All Comments on 'A Slave to the Servants Ch. 20'

I just adore this story...it makes me laugh, cry, cringe & cheer! I love the world you have created and feel so lucky that you are willing to share it with us very week. Keep up the great work & I'll see you next week.

I look forward to when you update. I enjoy this story. However, for me its starting to get a bit redundant. Its not going up nor down. I just feel like I'm reading a journal.

Another excellent chapter. I am enjoying this story so much. Thank you for sharing. :)

At the brothers assessment of Ciara's fighting skill. After four days of intensive training, maybe she could best a shopkeeper. If he was young. AND unarmed.

I think that all this training and preparation is going to pay off someday. I still believe Ciara may start a revolution.

Each chapter seems fresh and new to me. The characters evolve, and groundwork is prepared for the eventual climax.

I love the story, every bit of it.

I look forward to it every week! Thank You!

I was jumping up and down when I found out Hanna secretly placed a letter between the Generals letter.

I just love the family they have become, I'm also happy to know that Damien has some type of pride with Hanna. I think he would of been a wonderful dad if he was allowed to be with her.

Truly enjoyable novel, lovely long chapters that allow us to get really involved, appreciate the regular updates, and what an interesting world! Not to mention the always totally hot sex. Well done and thank you. Cheers.

I love this series because you really develop each character. I find myself rereading this series for the story, not just for the sex. Though the sex is awesome! I was so excited when I see that a new chapter is posted. Seriously makes my day.

Love it,love it,love it.Look forward to next week for more!!!

cant wait till your next chapter >.< you seriously should consider publishing this :)

I loved this chapter! If I were Ciara I would talk all the time in the village! Loved the chapter! Can't wait for more!

Like your hinting at something and I hope it's not what I think, but we will see. Anyway another great chapter as always

i so loved this chapter and how grouchy Ciara was and the guys not knowing why, or how she didn't understand it herself. But to me it seemed like she was having a PMS day that all of us ladies suffer from..lol Can't wait for the next chapter hun and Happy Birthday to Steve & Monique...(i know i don't know them but couldn't help but say it..lol)

Donna

Are they preparing to run away? Why else would Ciara need to learn how to fight.

I am uneasy about the way Ciara and her family eroticised the punishment Damien gave her this time. Realistically, caning is very painful and 32 strikes from a cane is NOT light pain play--the resulting bruising and damage to her skin would not be trivial. And we're supposed to buy that it turned her on so much that immediately afterwards she wanted to have very rough sex with all of them? Where are you going with this, DoctorWolf? It's a slippery slope you're balancing on. I just hope that you don't turn Ciara into a stereotypical pain-loving slut/submissive female as depicted in many of the BDSM stories on this site. That would be heartbreaking.

If that is all you got from this awesome story it is sad there is so much more to it than just her getting a red arse and having sex. I for one loved Damien's reaction to what she did to him. That was priceless!!! She literately to his breathe away...ROFLMAO!

There is so much more of this brilliant story to come and it gets better and better with each chapter.

Yet again you have produced a chapter that is both unique and intriging. Love the story and cant wait to see more

I'm amazed how enthralling each chapter still is.....I'm not anxious for the destination. I'm enjoying the ride......

love this story please keep it them coming!!!

I love it. I love how you are giving Ciara more fight. I love how you are making the men pay attention to her as a 'human' and not just live this 'black and white this is how it is' existence. How the men have grown to respect and understand Ciara as a mother outside of their own trained understanding of breeding is nice. Even the reactions to the information about their own breeders makes the men more developed. The communication from Hannah was very clever. The detail on how the General knew was good. You leave no details out.

I am not into pain but you somehow make it interesting between Ciara and the men. You some how make their interactions very sensual. I am normally turned off by descriptions of inflicting pain, leaving bruises, getting beat up, and descriptions of gagging from deep throat but the foundation you have already created of their intimate relationship softens those details. The best thing about your writing is that you create a fully developed, descriptive story and weave in threads of eroticism. The story is fabulous with out any sex. It is just that good. It is a good story so there is no need for cheap, shocking, and extreme descriptions or character dialogue. The responses to arousal of the men you write is more than 'hot'. The way the describe the look in their eyes and way Ciara interprets their reactions is excellent. I can't wait for more.

I can't wait to see if they are going to revolt or run away wuth Ciara. I don't know where they would go but of course I am not writing the story. I hope this lasts a while. I think most were expecting it to end at Chapter 20 or soon after but I hope there is still great deal more to write.

Ohhh, I can just see it moving on. The build-up is fantastic.

I laughed out loud when I read the part about Evan dancing like Ciara. Keep up the great character development!

Ciara should have told the them about the pleasure too... but that is kinda private. Thanks so much for updating!!!!!! I love reading about this planet you have come up with.

Excellent chapter as usual. I feel the family will be traveling soon.Happy for Hanna also.

Just wanted to say this was one hot chapter for me :]

I'm awed you dared to put some light bdsm in here and earlier, probably knowing some <em>vollpfosten</em> will vote you down for that. Thanks for that. Stay true to your story.

I know this is no discussion board, but occasionally I miss the possibility to comment other comments.

To A nony mouse: there was no single mention of a cane here! described was a whip-like instrument similar to a riding crop and Ciara herself referred to a whipping. Force is also a strong factor. Please read what you read. Understandably someone not comfortable with that might not see the finer details there, but please get your facts straight.

Back to useless speculating on the next twist... and I'll keep that to myself this time.

Well, I'd love to see a strong Ciara warrior woman, maybe in 'book 3' ? :p

But the way dynamics have been set up and her not being overly eager I don't really see that happening.

"You could best a shopkeeper, perhaps" --

"A young shopkeeper" --

"If he was unarmed"

Ahahahaha.

chapter 20 and i hope another 20 in the works!

it never gets old to read this and it certainly doesn't have a feeling of dragging things out either.

more more more

GREAT Story. Thank you!

LOVE IT!!!

I was wondering if Evan can hear her a little if maybe Hannah might be able to as well. Awesome as always! See you next week!

It is pure talent, after 20 chapters I'm still so invested in the story and the sex scenes still get me H-O-T hot! usually it gets boring and repetitive but you've got some skills Doctor!

I have been reading each new chapter and I like where the story is going.

As different as this world is, I love when you remind me of how relationships really are...like Christoff, my husband much prefers me to sleep nude so we can spoon skin-to-skin. :)

I started reading this story on a friday (its wednesday now) and I've been totally hooked since. The range of emotions in the story and the ones you take the readers through are incredible. I love the character development that has occurred through the chapters so far...I can't wait for the next one!!

I thought for sure she was going to visit them during their vacation in the mountains. I love the letter she sent! I'm so attached to all the characters.

i think you are looking at this the wrong way, You are looking at this as if D/s or BDSM relationship is all about that, IT IS NOT...and i would know *chuckles softly* i classify myself as a slave. i am what is called a natural submissive and believe me when she (Ciara)was taking the PUNISHMENT of her choosing she barely felt it and it is and can be a erotic high and afterwards it will amp her up for sex with Her Men. To feel Your Partner caress those marks is quite arousing. And i know for sure when they had sex Ciara entered what is called subspace. *smiles wickedly* i've been in that state and believe me when i say i do and don't feel it, its like watching what is happening at the same time as feeling it. It is the most intense feeling i have ever felt and i am sure is the same thing for Ciara.

Ok i will get off my soapbox now and *blushes* but i couldn't help but comment on Anon's statement.

This is one of my absolute favorite stories on Lit. I count down the days until the next every week. Keep up the good work.

Thanks again for an amazing new entry! I read and vote every week!

The story was amazing as always, but started a bit fast, picking up from the cliffhanger as it did... I had to go back and re-read to figure it out, ha. Still, amazing story... Amazing amazing story. Don't stop writing!

The story was amazing as always, but started a bit fast, picking up from the cliffhanger as it did... I had to go back and re-read to figure it out, ha. Still, amazing story... Amazing amazing story. Don't stop writing!

To Anonymous @ 10/12/11:

Depending on the strength of the caning, and whether or not it is designed to arouse or punish - you could be right or wrong. I feel it sad that you are so certain that you can't even harbour other ideas. As a slave said earlier, yes, it can be erotic, both for the slave and the Master. 32 strikes may be a -lot- if the punisher is delivering hard blows, but a riding crop can also deliver lighter blows while marking the flesh, doing less damage, leaving a sting, etcetera.

In short, you choose what you read, and this story is written very well as a fictional piece, and you over-analyzed that one bit a bit too much, in my opinion.

My only problem is how to convince my hubby he needs to find 4 other guys so I can be their slave too- and worrying literally nearly constantly if Nu-Reeh is going to "Make" the guys treat her differently or poorly! Forever the addict-thank you SOOOOO much for feeding my addiction.

PERFECT way for Hannah to communicate. I got so excited reading the letter my daughter came to check on me! Wonderful plot twist. I loved it. I get such a giggle at her having to put up with 5 male egos. Still I'd rather do that than eat live worms!!! Ewwwwwwy Thanks again!

Man if I were a slave to these servants I could die happy! Loved the bdsm and can't wait for the next chapter!!

This is the best story line i have read. I even have my wife hooked on it. She thought i only read it for the sex but i read it for the people. If it is not belivable it is not as fun to read. You have a great gift please keep this story going. If you decide to publish this story i know many of us would gladly stand in line to purchase it. Keep up the great work .

Mjp191

This is the sexiest chapter I have read. You are doing an amazing job with both the storyline and describing carnal pleasure. My excited imagination and erection thank you.

Please continue....I only came to this site to see if you had added more to your story

Seems like there's something else going on, not just her missing Hannah. Are there more twists and turns around the corner?

Loved the chapter as usual. Looking forward to the rest.

Love the story line AND the writing! I found it several days ago and just completed Chapter 20. I'm hooked!

I just found this story and could not stop reading, the details in the development of the world and the society and the growth of the characters really made me looking forward to each chapter and it was very difficult to take breaks in my reading. I look forward to the next chapters. Thank you for sharing your writing.

This chapter was my favorite so far! Thanks again for sharing your talent!!!

I'm the anonymous commentor who questioned the eroticising of Ciara's punishment in this chapter. First of all, I LOVE this story, and I realize that there is alot more to it than that scene! But I felt it necessary to point out that her punishment was not just a sexy spanking, it was 32 strikes of a "thin, firm rod" (excuse me, nigil, but that sounds cane-like to me, no matter what you call it!) And yes, I know that the force used can be light or heavy. Semantics aside, Ciara herself described her bruising as "heavy and red," yet is proud of the welts and marks on her body, and is so aroused that she has very rough, even painful sex with her men, making her sound like a stereotypical submissive/pain slut. That IS a slippery slope as far as the story's direction is concerned, and I have every right to question it. PhoenixCodes thinks that I overanalyze and "can't even harbour other ideas." All of you are missing my point. This story started out to be about a strong woman who tries to stand up for herself despite her circumstances--not a woman who gets turned on by pain.

BDSM elements--some quite extreme--are turning up in many of the other story categories on Literotica and it is unsettling. I am far from close-minded sexually or I wouldn't be on this site, but it disturbs me that many Lit stories depict women who are sexually turned on by being hurt, degraded and abused, and depict men who get off by treating women like pieces of meat for them to beat and cum on.(Obviously, I DON'T mean this particular story! I know the brothers care about Ciara.)

All of this has me struggling to understand the whole BDSM dynamic and trying very hard not to judge, as I feel everyone has the right to be who they want to be, as long as they don't infringe on the rights of others. I am attempting to find out more about BDSM by reading through the boards here, FetLife, and other blogs written by submissives. But I have to admit, when I read how some subs are proud of the extreme amount of pain and brutalization they can take from their dom, and look at it as an offering of their love and submission, it makes me sad for them. So if I sound like I'm overreacting as far as this story is concerned, that may be why.

Pleasureseeker, I have been reading this story and thoroughly enjoying it. That being said, I really appreciate your comments. I also agree it's a slippery slope and I hope Doctorwolf can keep from sliding down and off the edge.

I love the story. it is very well written and very much entertaining. though my mind is one that sees things differently. I see the writing and the story, not the erotica. not a bad thing just who i am. I do ask one thing that may help the story its self. not to criticize your proof reader but during some of the erotica parts he tends to over look some of the grammar mistakes, I assume because he is aroused. having multiple proof readers is never a bad thing and rereading what you have written you will catch things you didn't notice before. Keep writing, it is good stuff, but never forget to reread what you have written, it may even help with what you are trying to write.

if you have any questions about submission or being a slave, i will be more then happy to try to answer your question, i refer to myself as a slave, but what i am is a natural submissive, i've been in BDSM lifestyle for close to 24 years now. If your not into the lifestyle, you will not understand it, you may try to learn about it but you'll never truly understand it. Not all subs are pain sluts as we call them, but we do enjoy some pain, if i were in Ciara's place i would be in the same state. As i said feel free to contact me, i will try to give you answers to your questions.

Donna

Loved the sex scene in this one - particularly Ciara exerting her power over Damien when she gave him that blowjob. I'm really not a fan of the BDSM stuff that's been leaking into this series. I really hated the bondage stuff a few chapters ago and I hope that the 'punishment' ceases. I do think the way it was used here was a good compromise over putting her at the posts. You did use this very well, but I would really hate Ciara to turn into a submissive. Its a lot more exciting when she takes control - little Ciara, the weakling human woman making five grown strapping Adonis' weak at the knees and giving in to her desires is just way hotter them using her like she's a an inflatable sex doll/punching bag (the worst part of that is when she actually enjoys it! Where has her spirit gone then!?) If you are going to bring more BDSM into the stories, how about letting Ciara hold the whip next time rather than being the victim of it. I'm sure if she lost a bet with Damien (perhaps related to her new skills with the sword?), he might bend over and take it like man! lol That would be fun to watch. Ideally though, not too more BDSM stuff - there is a separate section on lit for that if that's what you're really into.

Also, you put English words into italics yet leave 'zipped' in regular font. Do they have zips on Pateria? You haven't mentioned any so far. This word would have no meaning for them.

Interesting relationships.

In defense of the BDSM scenes, I don't believe that you are overdoing them. I think that you are trying to give all of your fans a little something to cheer about and I applaud you for that. In any event, we all ought to know that variety is the spice of life; and among couples mixing it up a bit is what keeps things interesting. I had seen Dom-like tendencies in Damien from the very early chapters, during my first reading of your story, with his insistence on Ciara's obedience and his inability to take a joke; certainly he was like my Dom in this regard; so perhaps, that is why I was never surprised at how things had turned out when I read this first.

As this story has progressed though, I have become less interested in the sex and more in the complex relationships between the characters that you have woven. That said, for me, this was perhaps the best chapter so far because of the intense sex at the beginning and because the playfulness of Ciara's Brothers is so apparent here. I find the Brothers fascinating people and their relationship is something that I am beginning to envy.

I think that you are a fantastic writer and a master storyteller and I have enjoyed both of the stories that you have posted here on Lit. True there are still several errors in grammar and typos that need eradication, but neither you nor Steve is a professional writer or editor, and so I think that your readers should forgive those even as we encourage you to find a genuine editor so that you can have this published in a mainstream forum.

This is my second time through your tale. I decided to re-read it to comfort myself as I waited for your next chapter and I am glad that I have done this since I have picked up more of the details that I seem to have missed during my first read. It is funny how.that happens even though one would have sworn that the first reading was done carefully.

I hope that all is well with you. I believe that you are pregnant yourself and I wish you the BEST of luck with that.

Once she gained a bit more of freedom and CLOTHES, I immediately thought of Dobby from Harry Potter! She's a house elf... a sex slave elf, lol.

I really have come to love this series. And I think this sex scene was the best yet!

I could chEerfully throttle you, DW. I have not left my house in almost days neither slept, cuz I'm reading youR 'stinkingly' entertaining stories. You need to be arrested for putting out something this interesting.

Your stories are amazeballs, the plots, the twists, even the distasteful group sex. This book is so good I can't put it down. I love the way ou try to tie up loose ends. You are very talented and I'd buy your work in a jiffy. Keep it up!!!

I can't say I enjoy the BDSM scenes. It's definitely not my thing. I like that Ciara has received a few more things like clothes and the training, but I really don't like that at the same time the BDSM thing seems to increase. To me that seems to take away some of her recovered dignity. The guys can be wonderful one moment and sort of jerks at others, as Ciara realizes actually, one moment they give her liberties and the next they boss her around and threaten to beat her...

Still the story is great so I'll keep reading!

For all those who dont like the BDSM.....read something else! My Dr Wolfy-pooh, your are wonderful...please continue...no really...continue!

I along with other reader cannot put this story down I read it ever sec I have free time.

Thank you for the great story!!!

Like many of the other readers, I cannot stop reading this series. It is now six am. I was planning on reading a chapter and heading to bed three hours ago.

I would have bet that there would be no way Damien or Evan came around to Christof's thoughts regarding slavery and Ciara's position within the family. I'm glad that is a bet I would've lost.

I've only just started reading this maybe two weeks ago, and already I read this like I'd read any other book! You make every chapter and page such a descriptive experience, I find I have to fight myself not to read it when I'm in public, or working on something. You have such a fantastic way with your writings, and I was captured by it from page 1. You have no idea how much it surprises me to find such a great story, that could easily be published I feel, on this sort of site. You have a talent for sure.

I love this story so much .I thought I'd just read the beginning again but I just can't stop !

I really enjoyed this chapter, it was interesting and funny. Thank you

Awwww. I had hoped Bane would keep his rings. He's quickly becoming my favorite and would love him having them all the time. I really love the way you keep the kinky bits fresh and exciting, pushing the limits some might even say. But I figure your readers must enjoy that dark pleasure. Still reeling from Bane taking the plug, forgot to mention that a few stories back. Kinky and hot!!

the mailed package with the secret letter was brilliant.

i have an idea of where this series will end...i will let you know if i am correct.

I hate and love this story. Love because I enjoy good fantasy and challenging scifi. Hate because I can't tell my friends and family about the great novel I'm reading, or why I suddenly want to talk about weird subjects like parenting flying children. I agree with another comment that the sex doesn't turn me on much, but I still enjoy what their interactions reveal about the characters. Well done.

I love this story! I wish we had more insight into the private conversations between other earth women and their owners.

Agreeing with both of the last two anonymous posters:

1. This would be a quite good novel even if you heavily edited down most of the explicit stuff. I hope DW does that or even did that, their profile was last updated 6 years ago…

2. I was going to comment on it a bit later but Rose has quite a story to tell, idk if DW would like to explore it because it seems like it’d cover a lot of the same ground as Ciara’s story but with 70 years of stagnation at the keepers. We get an “ending” of her tale along with Ciara’s in later chapters where we see some of that at least. DW clearly dropped a lot in the last chapters to finish the story so I wonder if the original plan was to look into that more.

More generally commenting on this chapter… the comments on BDSM are interesting because they were criticizing DW for possibly making Ciara into a pain slut or something. But looking in world I see that the danger being introduced is that paterians don’t know what BDSM as we understand it is. There are no limits established or even implied and there is not even a true understanding of psychology or physiology. That is *very* dangerous.

A previous commenter said “Damien is a natural dom” - sure that’s a surface reading based on the website we’re on ;). But there’s a lot more going on there. The brothers are often treated as separate by Ciara and commenters but are for most purposes they are one mind and *have been since childhood*. Damien is “dominant” because he is “first” and publicly speaks whatever the family consensus is. The way their bond works means that while they will debate, eventually some sort of consensus is reached if only to avoid pain. That consensus can be agreeing to disagree which is where their compulsive gambling comes from. Strong disagreement? Fine, 5 way bet, move on, see what happens. If they didn’t do that however, presumably there’d be enough pain feeding into their tempers and they’d spiral until they break. This means that when making a decision as a family if there is no immediate discomfort they barrel ahead as a unit and that once a consensus is reached there’s a lot of inertia.

How does this apply to Ciara? Well, she’s been part of their bond before and they could sense her strong disapproval of certain things and just avoid that. While they can and did “out vote her” when a majority felt strong, they also did just do slightly different things just because her disagreement for something was a mild pain point and it was no big deal to just avoid those things. This is what truly made her family in their mind.

Without the bond and thinking of her as family however we have a big problem. Now when they are making decisions she’s not “in the bond” to make a private equally weighted vote that causes discomfort. If Ciara is family and an equal “sister” then if there isn’t pain in the bond then whatever they’re planning or doing can’t be that bad. This is also why they just up and decided to get her a sword and the same clothes - go with the flow, this is how family works. She’s at a huge disadvantage say in the market in this chapter because she can’t talk in the family mind. She also can’t get the family feeling of “of course I need to learn to use a sword, it’s what we’ve always done”. The brothers

Spoilers… if you’re rereading you know some very bad things are about to happen because of these mechanics. They use the 5v1 thing to *rape* her. Further spoilers… this is why the “real” spouse bond works very differently. In an extreme disagreement t Ciara is supposed to be able to say “good bye” into the hive mind, turn it off and fly away from the 5 of them, then briefly flicking the bond on and off to ask if they’ve ready to listen to reason.

This is such a neatly crafted story with so much going on. I really can’t say that enough and I hope you’re still reading these comments.

Still good story,but the Men still treat her like a slave and she likes it. Still hope Hanna comes to the rescue.