All Comments on 'A Slave to the Servants Ch. 22'

I loved it and cant wait to find out what happens!

I guess after the hype about the last chapter I was expecting something more, i guess my own imagination was running away with me!! But frankly I found this chapter a let down. Chapter 21 put emotions at a high and this whilst giving more information about the structure of Pateria had my emotions dropping like a lead ballon. I did like that she was pissed off and they were somewhat (minorly) regretful about what they had done, a bit more emotion from the men would have been nice to see, especially Christof who seems to have lost most of his empathy for ciara. The reason I don't use Rachel, her earth name, is because I still feel she's a slave and is for all intense purposes property/a possession, the brothers are still controlling her.

Too short in a read also I was expecting 4 page and praying for 5 or more, which I think would have given chapter 21 a good backing for after she was 'punished' and levelled out the story, Im hoping there is a build up to the next twist in the story, in the next chapter. The last one left me sitting on the edge of my seat and clicking refresh repeatedly today, but now I fear I've worn my mouse out for no reason I just hope the next one can revive my spirits to continue to read this great, imaginative story.

Also was it me or did something just seem missing from the story? I can't put my finger on it!!

3/5 not a favourite but I will continue to look for the next chapter... Thanks DW

i agree this chapter was a bit of a let down also think the story has run it course

Is that all the fallout we can expect from her beating? Mild regret from the men and a shrug from Ciara? That's really disappointing.

this one ended far too quickly for me. I've become an addict :)

I was expecting more fallout from the 'punishment'. This chapter just ignored the emotion that the beating brought up. It was completely glossed over and that was disappointing. Ciara just shrugged and accepted it. The men need to see the consequences of hurting someone they supposedly care for. Complete disappointment in an author that I had previously enjoyed. DW you can do so much better as an author.

We can't stay at maximum intensity all the time or the story will turn into an extraterrestrial "Indiana Jones." A lot has happened among beings for whom change had been rigidly avoided. Change that will have to work its way through their lives for stability to return.

The new Keepers represent a titanic shift in Ciara and Rose's lives. There is dignity to be had in the writing they are now doing. Instead of being pets, they are becoming productive.

When you stop to think about it, the new face of Ciara's life is as revolutionary as her being taught to fight and being a mother (of sorts).

This is a more thoughtful chapter than the last, but critical nonetheless. The tension about the consequences of Ciara's actions remains. The story can still fly off in many directions.

Plus we have some serious baby making to get to. Who will be the next dad? Will the Women be satisfied with single births, or will they want twins? Much excitement still to come.

Yeah I was kinda hoping for a much bigger stand on Ciara's part..the scene really just didn't sit well it me..kind of like a battered wife scenario...he says' he's sorry...girl overlooks everything that happened....

Don't dig it.

i am glad that Ciara did lash out in anger and made Her Men understand that using extreme punishment will not make her learn better, she also made them realize that she is not like them in that regard, but they still don't quite understand but they are learning i think.

i was hoping that the Men would feel a bit more guilty then They did but then i realized they are not Earth Men and probably don't know what guilt is. Or perhaps its not a concept they understand. But Ciara did make them understand that if they kept up that kind of extreme punishment all it would do is make her fear them and that they did understand.

i found it amusing that Evan jerked the Administrators chain during lunch and was doing that on purpose. You would think they(Administrators) would have realized that. Also had a giggle at the description of them when they were back to the Keepers since they obviously don't know how to travel in the woods. Ok i will stop my rambling now and say thanks for the posting and keep up the excellent work and can't wait for the next chapter.

Donna

ok, at first i was pissed off AGAIN that ciara took a passive road after her punishment, but on earth she would have had the ability to let it run it's course and she would have been able to tell these guys to get lost,(among other things) but she's not on earth. Her reactions have to be more understanding and compromising. i know, i know, they beat the crap out of her and someone should have hell to pay, but something else came to me as i was reading this chapter, these men didn't beat her to be cruel to her, they did it for 2 reasons, the first because they truely care for ciara and didn't want her taken from them so they genuinely believed that they were teaching her a lesson, and the second is, they live what they learn. this is WHAT they know, this is ALL they know. so this is what they do. once ciara tells them about punishments and pain, how it affects humans and then suggests that not only are there are other ways to punish but gets them to agree that she would also have a say in her punishment they listen to her and then wind up agreeing to it all. because they really do care about her. i think what this boils down to is ignorance. it was ignorance on ciara's part that caused the problem and ignorance on their part causing them to punish her in ways that are extreme and cruel to humans. but the important thing is that they both learned lessons and are willing to see and understand each others points.

they boys did feel bad also, dw gave many examples of it during that scene, expressions on their faces, things they said about how they felt during the punishment, the different looks they gave each other to ciara's reactions. this was a bad thing for them all. ok, so that's enough from me. I'll just shut up now.

dw. i was wondering how the heck you were going to make sense of this, but you did (at least to me). thanks for the great chapter 22. 5 stars!

I've enjoyed reading this whole story in the last 3 days. Thank you. How many chapters can we expect? I'm really curious to see how this will finish but also a little sad that all stories come to an end. -C x

Not much to say, but this story is excellent

What I like most about this chapter is how subtly it illustrates that Ciara and the men come from wholly different paradigms in terms of communication. The men don't say what they are feeling, though they communicate their emotions quite profoundly, I think. They just don't do so in ways a human would find satisfying. And Ciara is sometimes awkward in finding ways to communicate, because words have more concrete meaning for her than they do to the men; she's not able to communicate fully through subtle action the way the brothers can with each other. Of course I may be reading too much into it. I just like watching how these characters communicate. :)

I really liked this chapter. I have to agree that I was expecting more of a shout out/stand off between Ciara and the men but I also felt satisfied that the men ended up feeling guilty for it and that Ciara ended up showing how she felt. Not everything has to end up in a war to come to a compromise, especially if the love is enough in the relationship for both sides to listen, least that's the way I think. The rest of the chapter shows how much the men were willing to stand up for Ciara which I liked; first with the men facing off with their best friends and then with the whole compound. Thank You again for an amazing chapter, you guys always leave me feeling a ton of incredible emotions :)

The writing is, as always, amazing as hell. There's no two ways around the fact that DoctorWolf is an amazing author. However, with what happened at the end of the last chapter, I do feel that Ciara gave in too easily, wasn't hurt enough - She was beaten to the point of passing out, and despite the fact that 'this is how things are done on this world', human nature... is human nature. I honestly can't see her going through acceptance of the fact that she had just been beaten as soon as she woke up the next morning. Hurt, anger - yes, I can see those. However, I feel it should have taken her a few days to come to terms with it, understand their side... The speed with which it all happened was -much- too fast.

That said, this IS a fictional story, and certain allowances must be made for that. This is one of them - Perhaps DoctorWolf did take the punishment a bit far, and did take the recovery a bit fast. That's her right, as the author! This is her story, and while that was an excruciatingly hard bit of the story to swallow, it's a testament to her writing skills that it didn't turn me, or any number of readers, off this story for good. Any lesser a writer, and I would have said 'to hell with this, it's not believable'. As it is... I'm willing to just keep going with the story.

I think, as well, a large part of that is WHERE it was... The last chapter ended on that note, instead of ending after it had been fully swallowed. Try taking a week long break with a massive pill halfway down your throat! Hehe. Anyhow, if you read this LilWolfSpirit, I'm curious what your thoughts on the 'healing process' are...

As always, looking forward to the next chapter. Glad to see Ciara/Rachel putting her skills to a use and all, and glad that the outbreak of info was contained!

I think Ciara has settled back in to her old life too quickly. Trust is fragile and they broke their promise to her. They have made another promise not to punish her in that way again but can they be trusted? Actions speak louder than words. I'm surprised she's not still flinching from their touch. I guess the true test will be her reaction if they are angry or if she makes another mistake. As brave and strong as she is trying to be, her true feelings will come out eventually.

I like the way the brothers made their decision and the fact that they are willing to compromise. I also like the new keepers and the slaves' tasks etc. You have opened up another part of their world to us, which is great!

I'm back at 5 stars but I still think that Ciara's reactions are not quite right. Perfect when you look at things rationally but she is human. Lots of things trump logical thinking when it comes to humans. Emotionally and realistically, her actions were a bit off to me.

Regardless, I loved the chapter and am already looking forward to next Wednesday.

I loved this chapter. I loved that Ciara got the men to see her side of things, slowly. I love that although they disagreed at first, they came together to an understanding at last. I love that the girls are getting to go to a new keepers (which sounds more like a school then a daycare). I love that her men are willing to stand up for Ciara and the new principals that she has taught them. I wondered where you were going in the last chapter, but you def. knew what you were doing the whole time! You have an amazing future ahead of you as a writer!

This chapter was a good recovery from the last but I still think Ciara could have been more forceful in her argument against the "punishment." If she had asked if Damien ever beat his brother's genitals til they passed out if the message would've gotten across better?

I like that Ciara and Rose are doing something constructive. Looks like a revolution of sorts is starting with at least 3 families now.

DW I really have to compliment you on your work. Most books don't affect me much but like others I was really angry after the previous chapter. Just shows how good a writer you are at making us love a fictional character

If you was male DW I would marry you JUST for your imagination...You're off the hook girl!!!!

this chapter was okay. The situation got blown off quickly. Last chapter had us up high, then suddenly we're back to the bottomless pit. The plot is starting to even off with the slave/master thing so I have a feeling the story is gonna end soon. yeah.... there really isn't much to say anymore. Thanks for updating DW!

Not your best, i dont see where you're going with the breeding, slaveryvissue, and women/man network. :( but as always am in love with ur characters!

I like that you will be introducing new characters from the Administrator Keepers. I loved this chapter. I think it would be cool if they all found a way to go back to Earth. Haha. How funny would that be to see the brothers on Earth all confused in a city or something.

If you could 'see where she's going with it', then it wouldn't be a good read that keeps you on the edge of your seat...

It saddens, amazes and frustrates me some of your readers do not understand that to have a truely well rounded story you need quieter moments to develop characters and lay ground work for future chapters. This is not a short work that needs everything spelled out as it happens! Some things need to mature. You can't expect to harvest grapes and get a fantastic wine straight away. So why expect it with a story like this? The 'fallout' may need to age before it can be felt. I think that for now, Ciara has had to bury her feelings as the boys do not completely understand what she was trying to say. I'm not one to tell a writer how to write or a complainer how to complain but, I'm sure I'm not the only one to see that 'the Punishment' will have far reaching consequences for the family. I wonder if it would have made any difference if Ciara had mentioned that physical pain is not the only kind of pain? If the boys can only understand that a lesson needs to be learned through pain, why not show them other kinds?

I am interested to see what part the Administrators and Fufi have to play in the story. I think there is a lot more to Fuji than meets the eye, at the moment she is a bit of an enigma but I can see there is more lurking beneath the surface.

I have to confess, I've become very invested in this story. I really enjoy the way you are developing it, teasing it out. When I started reading it there were about 12 chapters up. I wasn't really looking for a long story to read but after the first chapter I was hooked. I ended up wasting most of the day reading! I'm so impatient to read the rest, I hate being interrupted in the middle of a good book, and this it seems is no different. Thank you so much for filling my mind with a whole new world. - Mel :)

I love this, their is no way ciera could go back to earth. I would love to see her and her family settle and make teir own compound. live like the old days.

Thought this chapter was fab! Totally made up for her treatment, Im so glad they've promised not to do it again and realised she was effectively turned back into a slave. Guilt doesn't suit the Brothers, so I'm glad it was over fairly quickly. What I loved most was this new turn of plot! I love the Administrators Keeper compound. That is really cool, I can't wait to see what else they get up to there. I also love that the Brothers are sharing with Basin's family and Fuji's family. I would like to learn all of their family's names too. Great chapter!

Please publish and let me pay for the privilege of seeing this tale unfold

ciara and rose have an Ipad!!! lol keep up the great work DW!

and agree with everything that..Gimletedge,lilwolfspirit and Huntesangel and several others have said.

I loved Evan's behavior at lunch it had me lol, the way he was pissing of the admin...bloody brilliant.

To Wildsoul don't fret there is so much more to come and I look forward to reading each and every chapter.

Thank you DW for this brilliant tale.

Willie

from glancing thru the comments, i can see its not just me hanging on every word and wishing for another page!

yes your writing has enslaved us :)

I still love the story, but agree with others - the beating scene in the last chapter was just too severe for Ciara to get over it (so to speak) so quickly. Regardless of Ciara's realization that she shouldn't have shared the knowledge she did, the punishment still seemed like a huge breach of trust between her and the men. I can understand her still loving them, I just can't believe she trusts them again so quickly. I would have like to see them have to work hard to regain the trust they destroyed.

I remember reading a mention that there was probably only going to be 23 or 24 chapters (a coment back in chapter 12ish?). Is that still the case, do we unfortunately only have one or two chapters of this story left???

I found this chapter short, and it did not go into as much detail as many of your previous chapters did. I too believe too little was spent on Ciara recovering from her punishment. She was in pain, a lot of pain, yet she still professed her love to Damien? Liked the flinching from the brothers though, they deserved that.

I found interesting the contrasting situations in this chapter:

Damien and his brothers punished Ciara for talking to Rose and Fuji, yet Rose’s masters were very angry with Damien and his brothers for not doing the same.

The General wanted to seriously hurt Ciara and her men protected her, yet they were certain he wouldn't do anything to the other slaves.

The Administrators found it is best to have their slaves be productive, yet were quite upset that Damien and his brothers allowed Ciara to feed herself and even them.

LOVE IT!

I love the series, but I think the guys need to suffer for what they did to Ciara.... Not physically, but emotionally. What they did was not okay and even though they don't understand where Ciara is coming from, they need to suffer for what they did to her

i have checked this website everyday even though i know weednesdays are your submission days, but i love this story and i have never got into a series so much as this one!

Another fantastic chapter, i luv reading this epic saga every week. I love the men and think that Ciara/ Rachel is one tough cookie. Yes her punishment was harsh but she's on an alien planet, I think she's lucky to be alive actually. The men love her and thought they were doing the right thing, it's what they know, how they themselves were tought afterall. They will make up for it later I'm sure. Their behavior with the administrators was clearly orchestrated to begin A change that will eventually take place in this world hopefully. A bit of a women's liberation movement maybe. Anyways I luv luv luv this story and will be shattered if there is only a few more chapters left, as another person mentioned above. I need to find out what happens wen Ciara and her men have a baby boy!

I love this story!!! I check every week for it. DW you are an excellent writer, I agree you need to publish. I liked the way it was all handled it made sense to me.

But now to the musing that has been pounding my head....I have a question and wonder if anyone else is thinking the same...will the five father all 24 of ciara's children? I have been playing this around in my head and i am thinking while the mens owner might have said yes no one else would touch ciara that another group of women will basically make her an offer she can't refuse, as they might want a hannah from their favorite group of men....anyone else think the same or am I borrowing trouble?

jen

Have to agree with Minnesota61 and others who felt let down with Ciara's seemingly easy acceptance of her punishment in the last chapter. What DW has yet to address is the extreme and personal nature of the punishment. There is no comparison between the men casually taking their back whippings and the way they deliberately opened up her genitals to beat her most vulnerable area, her clit, to the point of unconsciousness. Why didn't Ciara point that out to them? To hurt her so badly in the place that they usually pleasure her is a particularly cruel act. How can there not be emotional repercussions for her down the line, especially when the men expect to have sex with her again? It will be interesting to see how DW handles this--will she ignore it or address it?

Without a doubt, DW is a masterful writer. While I sometimes don't like where she is going with the story, I always want to read more.

I liked that this chapter was a bit calmer than the last. I would like to point out that Nuh-ree hasn't said she wants 24 babies from Ciara. That was the maximum number of female babies that could be born from slaves without disrupting the current genetic makeup, and was determined by Hanna and Ra. I love the other family's and the administrators reactions to how the men are "not treating thier slave properly." I also like that the men stood up for how they treat her and basicly told them to mind thier own business. I like that the slaves at the administrators keepers have jobs just like the men.

I look forward to next weeks chapter, maybe because it was calmer it felt too short... or maybe im just greedy

I agree with pleasureseeker5 that whole beating her clit till she passes out and then her seeming easy acceptance of them afterwards seems odd...

Why wouldn't she have asked her 'brothers' to give her back her name when she became their sister? How are they going to handle this added reason to hate the men if she has a subsequent daughter? How is she going to want to be with them again without fear? And, when do we get to see Hannah again! If a person can adore a character, I adore her! I'm looking forward to subsequent chapters!

I think it is funny how people seem to be stuck on the 24 babies thing.

This chapter was good, but I wish it had ended with sex.

The slave's loose lips have already started the eroding of their way of life. It has started out small, but w/the bros. unwilling to go back to their old ways, this "rot" or the correct "knowing of how the planet works" can't stay a secret forever and ever. The bros. are proud and unrepentant of how they have evolved.

She more than deserved her punishment. At least, her wounds are not deforming or permanent.

It was simpleminded and exceedingly dangerous of her to share so much info. Yes, in her grief over losing Hannah, she was indiscrete, yet there is no going back in time. She can't take the words back or halt consequences.

Compared to the bros., she has made only a shallow commitment to the switch from slave to sister as evidenced by her putting the family in hazards way.

The damage she did is permanent.

This chapter was awesome! Completely worth the wait [grumble grumble]. I liked that Ciara was pissed about the beating and managed to convince the brothers not to do it again. I also liked how they reacted to her fear of them the next morning. Serves them right! I'm absolutely hooked on this story!!

I am so glad about how Ciara reacted to her punishment. They needed to be told that pain only creates fear and that the way they treated her made her a slave again. The scene with the elegant Administrators is hilarious. How can men be truly effective ordering other men when they can't even handle a walk in the woods? Oh, yeah. Sic the women on them! Ha!

...this story, you're going to need to consider having much stronger consequences from the last chapter. Even if you plan more fallout for the boys from their treatment of Ciara, this chapter doesn't allow enough time for her to move from the level of emotion she shows at the beginning of the chapter to the midpoint. I like that you are emphasizing slave behaviors (not sitting on the furniture) and that you're continuing to show a reduced level of trust, but it seems that you're glossing over the events of the last chapter. I still can't help but continue to feel that the type of punishment administered to Ciara was out of character for the men and out of place in the story. You've tried to write this away by indicating that they were attempting to hide the evidence by beating her somewhere no one else would see and that the potential repercussions of her actions merit the severity of the act. They could have beaten her across the soles of her feet to achieve the same effect. Even then the reader would still need more time with higher tension. Perhaps a time lapse during the chapter and a little exposition. All in all, the story is very strong, but this wasnt your best writing. You've ignored your characters a bit at a time in the story when readers are craving character development in favor of moving the plot along too quickly.

Did anyone else get a NAZI work camp flash at the new keepers compound?

honestly, i'm kinda at a loss as to how to take this chapter...i felt let down about how quickly ciara/rachel accepted the situation/punishment but the chapter does sufficiently point out the differences between paterian and human culture and society...i felt this chapter was too short as well in that i was expecting there to be a couple more chapters left yet there seemed to be new characters and subplots being introduced...either the last two chapters are gonna be 10 pages long or there will be more chapters coming to sufficiently tie up all loose ends (either way a win for me lol)...and please, to those who disagree with others' comments, let them be...they're entitled to it as do you to yours...the author also reserves the right to take these comments or leave them...DW always leaves a disclaimer to make comments whether good or bad...hmmm, maybe dw should make a forum where people can discuss the merits/demerits of each of the chapters of this story LOL

this is something that i am beginning to understand about these guys. we've all heard the expression "with out guile" i think that fits them perfectly. i've noticed that they basically say what they mean and mean what they say. they've never told ciara a lie or lead her to believe something other than what they say. they haven't pretended to feel feelings that they don't or try to make her believe they don't feel something when they do. they are an open book for her to read (with even some pics thrown in), and they expect the same from her, how many times have they asked her "what are you thinking and be truthful"? they place high priority on honor and family pride, bravery, honesty, and loyalty. this is so evident especially in this chapter. after all the trouble that is appearing just so far, they still protect ciara against their friends and their superiors because they feel her as family even though they know that she made the mistakes that she did(loyalty), they complimented her on how she accepted her punishment(bravery), Evan was pleased with her response to him because she showed acceptance of her responsibility for her actions(honor). Drama, deceit, and pretense are not part of their makeup, if they think it or feel it then she knows it.

After having commented on your story for the first time last chapter for the purpose of voicing my strong displeasure, I thought it only right to comment again on how well you smoothed things over. I really appreciate the continued growth of the story, world, and characters. I would probably still read all your chapters, even if they grew dull with redundancy because I do so enjoy what you have crafted. There are my positive two cents to counterbalance last week's negative two cents. :)

This whole world is a Nazi camp: secrets, insane punishments, lies and betrayal. Ciara should have been as angry as the General after the last story, and just as free to express it, if she is truely a "sister". They feel she will learn from pain, maybe she should whip them to get HER point across. Are you trying to display Stokholm Syndrome in Ciara? Any sex, eating, even her swordfighting training is simply for her masters' pleasure. This story was bland, not any better than the last one. Need more character development: more who, less why.

I think the punishment was in line with the characters because of exactly the reasons you have pointed out in the story all along and continue to point out- the men are warriors and are used to learning and reinforcing lessons through pain and have been taught their entire lives one thing about slaves- that they are completely dependant on their owners. That includes being taught new behaviors. They are just now trying to unlearn all those old doctrines and ways. They did not think their new "sister" would be able to see the error of her ways and learn just from the consequences of her actions without physical punishment. You write that Damien HAS in fact used corporal punishment to reinforce rules for his brothers. It is how they protect themselves and how they grow. I did, in fact, hate the way the last chapter just ended like that and did not like that Ciara was being hurt, but it is simply part of the story and I have sincerely enjoyed every single word you have written in your story so far, even if it makes me cry, shout at the comp. screen, or get mad. Please keep up the good work for your loyal followers and devoted readers. I do have to agree that the new keepers seem kinda creepy. At first I was like, 'yay! this is gonna be great! these slaves are able to talk freely with their masters!' but then it turns out the owners are a bunch of aristocrats and goodness knows that is bound to spell trouble. I don't get for one moment that Ciara has totally gotten over her punishment or any such nonsense. She just has to deal with it as life continues to go on. She may be coping a bit better and understanding things more from her talk with the men and hopefully now having reached an agreement with them. I think we will continue to see this point play out in the story. REALLY anxious about her having to be a breeder still! Your story keeps me on my toes. Don't listen to the naysayers.

I was not happy with the last chapter at all. But this chapter made me okay with it again. I like how Ciara got angry and I think we should see more of her spirit. Great job on smoothing things over, can't wait to see how you work the rest of the problems out.

It's hard to tell what you're actually trying to convey at this point. Sometimes I feel like Ciara/Rachel is doing a really good job of being as understanding and accepting of her new situation as humanly possible/rational, and other times I feel like she's straight off the deep end and has ZERO self respect left, and that's why she's doing so well.

She might as well be Fuji at this point.

I can't tell if I should be critiquing that Ciara just took her beating like a bitch and then shrugged it over the next day with very, VERY mild repercussions for the Warriors, or if that's what you're going for. She's learned and developed quite a bit from the first chapter, admittedly, but the fire from the first chapter feels like it's been all but snuffed out.

What happened to the girl who was screaming at her captors, glaring directly at the five who were about to purchase her at the auction? The girl who didn't care if the auctioneers "killed her for her bravado"? Where did that go?

This chapter moved the story forward a bit, but I feel like the immense build-up from the last chapter flopped and fizzled. All of the incredible tension that could have arisen from the people she's supposed to love and trust beating her into unconsciousness and then we get this? I feel like I've been punk'd.

My sincere recommendation would be to get a second, additional editor who is a WOMAN and could help read over certain things – like this – for earnest believability.

I know this story is far from over so stop fretting.

Huntersangel I love your last comment and I totally agree.

I love the brothers,although I must admit that Damien is my favourite. Sigh.

Funny how most of the nay sayers are anons.

...Doctor Wolf IS a female... I am Loving the story! I really enjoy reading it for the fictional piece it is. That's right, nitpickers it's FICTION!!!!! An entire alien race on an alien planet and you are nitpicking on REACTIONS?? That's where you find the problems? Enjoy the story; it's no fun if you pick holes in the story, just enjoy the ride!

Love your work DoctorWolf :) Keep it up ^_^

When reading this chapter I was struck by the thought that when Rachel is again pregnant she will again be bonded to the brothers and this newly reestablished bond will further shift their relationship with one another.

I love your storytelling and am deeply engrossed in this world you have created. Thanks again.

It will be interesting to see if there any after effects of the punishment when they're intimate again. Part of me does feel like she forgave them too quickly, but she couldn't talk throughout the beating because of the gag and appeal to them personally. Even when her men saw how she feared them and was angry at them the next day, they kept saying, 'it was necessary - you'll learn this time.' They're creatures of their environment, believing they failed somehow and looking towards others from the planet to teach them the "right way." But once Ciara can talk to them - really communicate - the brainwashing gives way to that belief that was nagging at them, that beating her was not the way to deal with the situation. When they allowed themselves their unique thoughts and feelings apart from the other groups of men, they realized that they had been wrong in hurting her. Ciara just understands them so well and when they're being sincere.

I see (and hope for) lots more of this story. It's fascinating, brilliant, sexy, intriguing, smart....5 stars as always.

Don't get me wrong, I've been following the story from the beginning and I love it. I watch for updates constantly. This is not my favorite chapter, simply because Ciara's attitude of late (the last several chapters) is just annoying me. Reminds me of a spoiled teenager. I do, however, like to see the further development of your alien world and culture. It's quite fascinating and detailed, so kudos to that. Eagerly awaiting more.

Yes, this is the type of punishment these men are used to experiencing-although whipping her clitoris was a bit malicious. All in all I understand the men's reasoning though. BUT, I feel like she gave in too fast for a human who has been violated by the ones she loves and trusts. She should be as true to her nature in this extreme situation as they are-angrier, more fearful, and distrustful. This chapter should have been more about her healing and the men earning her forgiveness & trust. I speak from personal experience-it isn't human for her to forgive abuse from loved ones and move on as fast as she did. Maybe she should have reverted to acting like a silent slave again instead of a sister(I don't know). I do like how they resolved it, and the agreement they came to.

I love all of these stories. If it were a complete book, I wouldn't put it down until I was done. Great story overall!

I love your story and I come looking for the next chapter each week. But I have to agree Ciara's attitude has been very spoilt teenager like. I think it's all getting to her head. I really think her family need to give her a wake up call. Besides that I love everything about this story. Can't wait for the next chapter

While there were many elements of this chapter I enjoyed, I don't think that the first bit was realistic. I know this is a fantasy world and Ciara is learning to live in it, but I don't think a person could "lash out" in anger so briefly as Ciara did after her punishment. I accept that she rationally understood the men's motivation and her own wrongdoing, but could she go back to being physically at ease around them so quickly? Could she just shut off the hurt feelings, the anger, the uncomfortable idea that they truly don't respect her as an equal yet? Since she's still a teenager, I doubt she'd have the emotional maturity to overcome something like this so quickly, despite the dicussion and agreement with the men.

If DW has already thought of this, I'm sure we'll see some of the fallout in later chapters. I sure hope so. That calming cream can heal the physical scars, but I don't think she can survive this ordeal emotionally unscathed.

I love this story! It's one of the few things that get me through each week. I do however feel like this part of the story just doesn't have the same feel to it. I used to be hanging at the edge of my seat, whereas now im just reading to follow up with the story. I just can no longer see where this story can go from here. I will continue to have faith in the next chapters, and the author!

Can't wait for more!

Ciara voiced exactly what I found unpleasant and distressing about her punishment in the last chapter; the 'healing period' is well named, and it's not just for the characters ;)

We are seeing the foundation of change in this chapter. I don't understand peoples reaction to this chapter. This is not earth and Cieara has been through a great deal on this planet and has come to understand its culture. She is not a 15 year old, she has survived hardships (even back on earth)much worse than the beating she received physicaly and psychologicaly.Yes she would be dissapointed, angry and a little scared but she knows this was the culture and she can trust these men despite this, because the change in their relationship has taken work over time and is a slowly evolving thing. I hope DoctorWolf will stay true to her/his vision of the story. Every little point that has been hit on in the earlier stages seems to have held importance or forshadowed a plot point later in the story. I find the introduction to these administrators interesting and I have been wondering when they will be introduced. I for one am not ready for this story to end as I am constantly suprised at how epic it is becoming. I am impressed.

still blame Ciara for the particularly brutal clit beating she received. Yes, she really blew it by telling all to her fellow slaves, but did the punishment really fit the crime? As much as I have grown to love the brothers, I can't sugarcoat or excuse what they did to her--it wasn't just an ass whipping, it was violent torture, applied until unconsciousness.

I am NOT believing that all it took was "We want you to learn the lesson. and I promise not to do it again" for Ciara to forgive the Brothers. Ridiculous. I was expecting a full-on "dont touch me" and her being scared of them, like she SHOULD be. I agree, how can you beat your slave's clit until she's unconscious and then expect her to still enjoy you touching her there?! I'm still mad that the most she did was flinch when they touched her, there needed to be serious reprocussions for the Brothers after what they did, like her withdrawing from them completely, since they basically BETRAYED her and broke their PROMISE even if they don't see it that way. THEY need to learn lessons too!!!! >:l

If it were me it would take a long time to get over what they did to her. It is one thing to take a hit across the butt, leg, or even face but on your privates? I probably wouldn't be able to forgive for a long time. I am almost certain these beings are human. The thought that you use cruelty to protect a person is exactly how humans act. "Let me beat it into you." Let's see what happens next.

Keep going. We need more.

The new developments are bringing. I love how diverse and different this story is so thankyou and good luck with your pregnancy!

[The cliffhanger in the last chapter fell on its face spectacularly so just hush it over and start a new thread to distract the audience]

"You broke your promise, now promise not to do it again."

Wtf??

I could accept this from a lesser author, but from you I've come to expect a better resolve than this.

Aside from that the plot development is still strong and the 'distraction' is a good one.

> And I still do vote for Rachel since Ciara is a slaves name given to it by its masters. <

Thx again.

A nony m.

I stumbled across this story only a few days ago and have been completely sucked in! You weave such an amazing story with complex characters and engrossing plot twists. It is clear you thought this through and are a great writer. I am SO happy it is so long, because I am attached to these characters and the world you have created! I think you should consider sending this to a publisher - it is good!

I think the brothers need to be taught a lesson for the lie they said to her, they promised they would never hurt her. next time they want to get a little frisky with the ropes and spanking she enjoyed before, she needs to be super afraid, so that have overcome the fear they gave her when they broke their promise, and if should not be easy for them. loved the story until they broke their promise, now it needs to be made right, they need to understand they crossed a line.

At first I felt like many others: I would be a lot angrier for a lot longer than Ciera. But then I thought about the entirety of her experience, and what she knows about the training of the warriors, and I think the story went where it should. Being a physically weak person stuck for a long while in a vulnerable situation with very literal overseers would change the way you think. The punishment was excessive, and eventually she got that through her men's conditioning. I expect we will see it affecting their future decisions, and by extension, affecting the women as well.

keep up the great work!

So she's soothed with cream but that's only smoothing over the physical hurt - what's underneath?

She may have forgiven them logically - or lovingly, but the body doesn't work like that. Flinching is an involuntary reaction to someone/ something who causes you pain, a survival instinct. Not rational. In her place i'd freeze next time Damian, or any of them, as they were all there - goes near her pussy/ inside leg, as that's where they chose to attack. But then, maybe secretly she is a masocist and just won't admit it to herself.

Interesting plot - thanks for writing something so bizarre and captivating

I may actually stop reading this story. A weak heroin is distracting and annoying. She was AWFUL at the end of the last chapter and beginning of this one. This is highly illogical coming from the background she had where she basically had to raise herself and keep herself safe. Letting them punish her like that without fighting back and giving in and thinking "it's for my own good" is nothing like a real person in her situation with her background would do.

I Love that your characters seem to have good moments as well as bad. Much like your other devoted fans I have a hard time knowing that someone is screwing up but it makes the story so much better in the end.

You have a wonderful talent

Ciara SHOULD be infuriated. Even if you have her repress her ire so not to earn another of their 'trainings'. I understand that you might be simply showing us how her willpower has faded into slave mentality and some weird version of Stockholm syndrome. But still, for her to not have a stronger reaction to their abuse, their betrayal?... even if for a short period before surrendering to the brainwash. Humph! It's just disappointing. At this point, as a reader, and given her past, I was expecting more of her.

I've commented before about how quickly she healed, but I've found myself needing to come back and re-evaluate this chapter.

All I can say without giving you spoilers is, 'stick with it'. Yes, the last chapter and this chapter are hard to stomach, due to how they hurt her and how fast she seems to heal. However, if you stick with it, I'm sure you won't regret it... And may even be surprised later on in the series!

The mark of a good author is the shocking twists in her book... this is just one of those!

All these people comment and say she's annoying for not taking charge and that your story suddenly is terrible. Do any of them realize that, in YOUR story, if she had "taken charge" and simply acted out, she would eventually annoy the women and be killed? Also, all these people saying she was betrayed by her men, children are spanked/switched and they don't end up abused and scared. Yes, I know that this was more than a spanking, but seriously people! She can't change the world in a day! The men are treating her as an equal - they are doing to her similar to what they would do to each other. I have said it before, and I'll say it again, I love this story. If I were in Ciara's position, I do not think I would have reacted any differently. She is, literally, weaker than the men. She, simply, cannot fight back. These negative comments make me feel like people really need to consider the rest of the facts you have handed out with your story - unless they want Ciara to suddenly be bitten by a radioactive creature and gain super human strength so she can not only beat the men, but also defeat the women, and, while she's at it, end slavery forever!

Oh wait...that would mean rising against her lovers and protectors and simply casting them aside. Some people would like that, but I prefer your version much better! The good and the bad makes me feel like your characters are true characters - thank you!

This a great story.Love the characters and their development. I read this in sips. Thanks.

I actually liked this chapter more than the previous one, although a see a few baffled comments. I hope it gets even better!

WHO WON THE BET???

Well I have been reading this non stop for the last week. I have to say it shocked me a little bit when I first started reading with all the tasting of urine and all but I am totally hooked now! I have a little trouble trying to imagine the women being kind hearted like Hannah and Ra at all but I'm so glad they are nice :)

They all won the bet. They felt the keepers would spy on their lunch time and prepared for that. Did a good job of it too

Sometimes when im reading this i get really frustrated with Ciara and think if i was her id take every opportunity to fuck up their lives. Knowing that emotion turmoil can destroy and kill 5 of these men at a time is a major weakness i would want to exploit. Knowing that nu'ra has to answer to these men's mother if something happens to them is another weakness. Id try to take her out too. Id rather be dead than be a slave so the i wouldnt be to concerned with the consequences of failure. her love for them disgusts me.

But then i remind myself that Ciara is a survivor above all other things. She isnt vengeful and looks for goodness in others.Those are admirable traits and make for a well written/interesting protagonist. She has to rationalize and react to things as she does to keep her sanity and keep surviving.

But i do love that Hannah and Mia are in the story to appease people like me. :)

As least Ciara didn't just take it lying down. She said something, and the men did feel guilt. It was completely wrong of them to do that, but the relationship they have with Ciara as a Sister who is not bonded, is new to them. They are still learning how things should work in that relationship, and they made a gigantic mistake. But they did feel guilty over it. There should have been more, but at least it was something. I was sincerely worried that Ciara would just say "I totally deserved it" and move on, instead of at least somewhat speaking up for herself.

It worries me more that Ciara still deep down thinks of herself as a slave. But it was an important defense mechanism in a hostile world, one that's not so easy to change... especially when she still has to act the part around anyone but the Brothers.

i cant imagine the agony of getting a pussy canning or whatever that instrument of torture was. no wonder she blacked out from the pain. her body just shut down.

this chapter was not my favorite. i guess, as another commenter brought up, the only way the men knew how to reinforce the message was through pain but your description was not my favorite read of all time. almost too intense.

one more thing that doesn't seem consistent.

in the family, there are no secrets or lies. this only seems to apply to cierra...

I feel like Ciara was acting really spoiled. She doesn't realize how lucky she is that her 'masters' still love her and are defending her against their friends and superiors. She told the secrets of their society. She should of realized that is a major mistake. That's why they punished her like that. Even after it doesn't seem like she thinks it's that big of a deal that she told their secrets. She's focused on herself.

Ciara after beying beat up or maby rather tortured should react more sharply. she should feel the men more like traitors. They before already proven happy to punish her and this time it was simply the pain. The thing they said they will never do. After that should come the breakdown that comes anyway but later. This is the moment i feel it more logic to come. She should feel abandoned betrayed and alone. No hope but only pain, torture and humiliation to come. Her reaction is more like to simple lashing. This is more sofisticated situation. She would always remember Damine nad hes face while he delivers pain, hes voice counting the blows. That would be truly everlasting wound between them

I have read many of your submissions. I love the Slave to the Servants stories. I do think that she should have been angrier with the men for their treatment of her. However, this like the rest of your stories is an interesting layer to Ciara's character. The final scene was laugh out loud funny, I love how the Brothers were poking fun at the snooty administrators.

I think in this chapter you went with critics on last chapter wanting Ciara reacting differently. Her feelings and thoughts were different when she went to sleep and when she woke up and it kind of broke the story and made this chapter not so convincing. You, as an author need to trust your story and your characters even when your readers want them acting differently.

Can you carry this story on?? I know it was long and came to a ending but I'm sure you could think of something to make it carry on. Please, I love this story and concept so much! I've read it about 10 times

Bad boys 😂😂😂😂

So much pain and she behaves like nothing happened. This is not possible or has she been altered and is now not fully human?

Re anon: “ Trust your story” from 5 years ago (I’m bullying myself for multi year reply chains I guess)

I think this chapter and the last one are the most in need of a plot related editing pass based on the direction the story goes from here. Alternatives include exploring human coping mechanisms for abuse, perhaps they used just a touch of calming cream or something else. It feels too much like this is “complete” which can’t be further from the truth. As is the only hint of follow up is the “imagine what hannah would do” line.

Great but Most Humans do not like slavery no mater how Mutch they are punished, or they will break to be nothing but empty things.