by beachbum1958
I just adore Harry! He is perfect! Cut him open and puppies will spill out?! How sweet! :-) I loved the anal sex scene... Very yummy! :-)
As always... Thank you for another great story!
So well done, Dialogue lite and entertaining. Publishable. Leaves reader wanting more.
A bit rough in spots; needs a solid final proofing and edit. Some of the dialogue needs phrasing and punctuation work. There's a smattering of missing words, double words and awkward phrasing throughout the first two chapters, my gut tells me the second needs a bit more than the first, though I might have been paying more attention in the second.
Some of the issues might also be dialect differences between British English and American English; phrasing, turn of word, etc.
Good character development, obvious & authentic feeling love between the main characters and delightfully well done love scenes. So far, the pace of the story has been even and just the right 'speed'; doesn't drag, but not too fast, either.
I'm curious to find out how 'The Father' ends up finding out about the illicit love between half-siblings. (You just know the old copper will.) Is the third chapter heavy with drama and tension and a chance of the relationship being forcefully severed, or will all be smooth sailing for the two young lovers? Guess I'll find out in the next 30 minutes...
Thanks for sharing and for all the hard work of creating this wonderful love story.
Absolutely delightful! You are a master of language, particularly of humorous language. Don't stop writing,. ever!
---Der Meister-finger
The story is the best part, I just think there is too much sex. I would have given 5 stars
if there was more story and less sex.
I know this site is for incest but the balance of sex and storyline is way off. I didn't think I'd ever say this but I'm starting to lose the storyline because of all sex. Too much of a good thing . ⭐️⭐️⭐️
the story line is great. you are a brilliant writer. there's not too much sex!!!! the anal scene was really over the top. fantastic. but what makes your tales so wonderful is they are both very sexy, and are just great loving fun stories with terrific characters. i hope you plan on writing more - you seemed to have slowed down.
5 STARS - as always.
I have been reading your stories for the past few weeks and aside from the wonderful amorous scenes, exciting the mind and body, your plots are riveting and heart warming. I love how you build the scenes and finish with an epilogue that leaves the reader fulfilled as being part of the story,
Signed Nick the professor
Sweet Story
Like Aussie1951 from 4 years ago, i feel there is too much sex. Without the dialogue between the main characters to break up the sex romps, it is difficult to even get a "sense" of how much time has past for Harry and Sai Fong since they became a couple; just one weekend i think?? And if that's the case, Sai Fong would be walking bow legged by now given their furious activity. I have a list of my "Most favorite brother/sister" stories. This is One them. For other readers of brother/sister incest, try "All I Need" by "Anomic". It is comparable.
With that said, i am enjoying the story especially beginning with pg. 2 or 3 of this chapter where the tenderness and expressions of Love began to emerge. The engagement ring, plans for the future, etc were great. And humor is always good. Sai Fong's "syphillis" story was hilarious as well as Harry's sense of impending Doom of what will happen when their dad finds out the hanky panky.
Lastly, I love reading about Asian women. I try to read every story i can find featuring at least An Asian female (siblings, cousins, etc) Especially if it involves Incest. Taiwanese, Chinese, Japanese, Filipinos, Vietnamese, etc!! Doesn't matter though i have a special soft spot for Taiwanese females for personal reasons. But They are All beautiful with beautiful features like Harry's reference to "China doll". So, a special thanks to the author for this story line
If i can't rate a story as a 5🌟, i don't rate it at all especially when it is already rated in the 4.7-4.8 range. I don't want to pull the overall rating down. -dave