by bluechick1976
I enjoyed this--but I have a weird thing for religious cults. lol I liked the clandestine nature of it, and the descriptions. Great job, good luck!
This is a great submission. You're writing is evocative and original. There's a thousand cheating wives and naughty school girls in here, but your character is already an original. I love running into good new writers on this site.
I'm not an overly crunchy-type, but I'm always turned on to the woods-sex scenarios. The way you describe Holly's body is really hot. It puts me in mind of a few of my own woodland adventures...I spent a summer in the Maine woods when I was younger, in love with a local girl. Neither of us were virgins, but we were having sex constantly, everywhere. Come to think of it, she was a Christian too. Thank god that didn't ruin it though!
I'm wishing I'd run into a Holly on my next hike.
Bluechick, you have the talent and the touch. I like your touch, it is soft and gentle and so your story was made lovely. Your description of his eating her was delictable and when he fucked her it was hard but not rough. No wonder she loved it. And your story was successful. It made my prick hard and hot and I`m know that is what you were striving for. How about a chapter 2. Keep your stories cumming.
John P
Absolutely loved your writing style. Not read any other submissions for this contest so far but yours is certainly a great start to get me going, can't wait to read more of your stuff. Rebecca xx
I've been reading stories here for more than 4 years. This is one of the best yet.
Literotica should advertise this author.
You're a woman who's taken my heart. Please continue with other stories. Jerry
Such a great story, I just wish you hadn't ended it so suddenly, maybe giving some idea of what happened after, such as dad bringing him home as hubby to be...
I would hope that you will continue with this very erotic story, with Ben and you continuing to meet at this spring and fucking...to the point that you accidently get pregnant with his baby, and onwards. I have always envied those hippie cults out in the wilds.
I thought this was excellent. got me really hot. Probably did the same to you bluechick. Hurry up with more
bluechick:
It is an easy read and well written. Congratulations. Thank You. Ronnie W.
and would like to see a chapter 2. New members of the church perhaps!
hey please write us another story. i dig your writing style . with stories like this, there is no work involved with pleasing my self. good job. and thank you. hey have you read My Wife's Teen Patient. One of my faves although i never commented on it. after reading it that categorie couldnt live up to my expectations . so i turned to incest/ taboo and its been pretty satisfying but yours is the best i have read since M.W.T.P. more more more
I look forward to reading more of your writing. Thank you and good luck.
I too was kind of hoping this would be part of the father's marriage scheme. Perhaps a continuation?
This is an extremly well written and very vivid story! The erotic sensuousness is sure to excite!
Great work!
I liked reading this - it seemed to have a born wild feel to it. The only drawback was that I think the end was too abrupt. Good luck with the contest.
the ending was a little too short but the story as a whole was good, hope to see you write more
That was great! I didn't want the story to end.. but to keep on going another page at least! Surely, she and he didn't have to leave very quickly! Not after that great "warm up"!