All Comments on 'Ashley's Tale - Demon's World 06'

Firstly, I'd like to point out just how awesome this story was, and Just how often I was checking for updates, to the point of being the very first view haha. Very nice and tidy ending, with a nice little hook on the end if you and your creative mind decide to keep writing along this story. You really should be in the top three hall of fame, let alone the whole list, but oh well. I can try by voting 5's, you've made a loyal fan out of me!

All the best, and once again another fantastic read,

Dennis

You have done such a wonderful job on this story I am sorry to see it end. I will be checking out all of your stories from now on thank you for taking the time to write

And the earlier ones, too. The first few chapters of Jezebel were pretty rough, but with the practice your skill has grown. Still some rough spots, but your storycraft is pretty good -- solid characters, good dialog, and an amazing productivity that I am seriously jealous of. Keep it up! I look forward to your next series!

I have just finished reading all three in this series and I just had to add a comment, One Heck Of A Series of Stories. Couldn't stop reading, would have read them even without the sexual scenes. I just have one more comment, if you are not a published writer, you should consider it, you are very good. I have thoroughly enjoyed your storytelling and I will be going on to your other stories on here now.

Hoping you add on to this story you have created . maybe go on now from her child's POV on how everything has changed

I love this story. Wish there was more. But I also like a number of your other stories, so just want to see you keep writing.

Great read hope you do many more

Good work, I was totally captured by Ashley and friends! I hope you do many more....Thanks

Really. What a wonderful story. And what a truly heartwarming ending. I don't really know why I put off reading these stories of yours that are set in the same universe. I guess I've been kinda jaded when it comes to succubus protagonists on Lit for a while, now. In a way, I'm disappointed in myself for not giving them a chance sooner, but I'm also happy that I didn't get around to them until now because I've been having a really hard time finding good stories on this site that I haven't already read.

It was really hard for me to start reading the "Ashley's Tale" story because I really missed Jez and Sandy, and it also took me a long time to come to like Ash. She really didn't become likeable for me until she started shedding her insecurities, which is kinda odd for me because I tend to fall for women who are a little bit broken. In her case, though, you did a good job of making her feel uncomfortable, if that was what you were going for. I loved Bonnie straight off, though.

In the end, though, I am glad I stuck with it, because it really turned out to be a significantly better story than the original. It felt like you really matured as a writer between the two stories. It also had a sorta strange shift from a generic story in "Jezebel's Tale" to that classic private eye genre story feel in the sequel. I really wish Jez could have made more of an impact in this story, though. It sorta seems like she would have had more of a purpose to fill at times, even if witches are capable of more powerful magic. It also seemed like Ash's family wasn't as involved as they should have been, giving how important family was to them in the first story. It just sort of felt like the world didn't quite mesh up with that of Jez's story because of those issues.

But otherwise, like I said, I loved both stories. Most of the characters were likeable, and all of them seemed believable for the most part. The plots were interesting and a lot of fun to read, and the world you built was fantastical, but at the same time grounded in a believable reality.

Obviously, I'd love to see more. It would be fun to explore not just the furry race, but also other mythological races. I could imagine dwarves being high-tech like the elves, with their legendary excavation skills and craftsmanship, and it would be interesting to meet dragons, with their magical skill and ancient intelligence (Seriously, how would humanity react to a giant reptile that can fly, wield powerful magic, and... What if they were pacifists?). I know it's an old story, though, and you did leave it at a good stopping place, but I still find myself wondering how their little 5-person relationship ended up. How does Bonnie choose between practical immortality and the pain of having to watch all of her human family die off? Does Ash give in and start passing out "pendant of youth" enchantments for her mortal relatives and all of their loved ones, or should the philosophical and moral issues block her from doing so? So many interesting concepts to explore.

Anyway, thanks for a great couple of days worth of entertainment!