All Comments on 'Audrey's Awakening Pt. 04'

Your character development and storyline are very engaging! I was looking forward to this chapter to see them come together as true lovers. Unhappily, the climactic scene was rushed and lacked real erotic impact-not to mention being unrealistic. You should have taken your time and made it a true love-making, not a "wham bam" coupling.

Sorry if I have disappointed you, but the fact is Audrey and Jessie are not in love. They have both merely submitted to physical desires that have been long repressed.

I could hardly wait to get to the next chapter

Adjoining rooms was a smooth social distancing suspense plus!

Thanks for sharing.

Jeez. What’s with the eyes having heart attacks, again? Why not...

His eyes were out on stalks.. or

He almost had a heart attack as his eyes took in her beauty.

It spoils a good story as it’s so bizarre.

Trust me, I never mean to be so redundant but sometimes with such a long narrative, I have forgotten what has gone before. I'll try to pay more attention

I guess it is too late to have him stop calling her "mom". It is really taking the love out of their relationship now that it is very sexual and (dare to say it) loving. The whole buildup of the trip and the dinner, and the nightcap is one of the best descriptions I have had the pleasure of reading. The feelings and thoughts going through Jessie's mind and narrative is extraordinary and refreshing.

I do have one little thing about after Audrey came home and Jessie called up Dana. It would have been very late at night when he did that and she was able to get some really good rooms for them for the next couple of days. A bit of the stretch of imagination there. I have been to that hotel and for sure it is fantastic with the seating and watching the water and light show outside is fabulous.

I enjoyed the plot, the development in the story and her enjoyment in the discovery of her sexiness and beauty ..but...I think at this point Jessie should be addressing her by her first name. .not " Mom"....that's a bit weird...otherwise very enjoyable and entertaining!

@Blueman5410, I totally agree. In hindsight, I would surely have modified his rhetoric.