All Comments on 'Bad Heather Revisited Ch. 02'

I do hope you give use a part two.Want to hear how the family gets together.

That was a much better ending, you would have rated much better in the contest if this had been the story.

You have one dirty mind and that is the reason i keep coming back to your stories..

My your wicked mind keep on writing such depraved stories for our enjoyement..

~

Gary Andrews

(garyandrewsbodyguard@yahoo.com)

I really enjoyed the level of detail and the readability. The kinkiness made it it enjoyable. Please write more!

the first version of this was good, but i didn't really like the ending and while it could have continued from there and played out a couple different ways, i don't think the end result would have been as good as what you pulled off with this re-write, which is nothing short of amazing. i loved reading this story and i'm looking forward to reading your other works!

This was even worse than the first release. I'm sorry, but I nearly vomit reading your stories. Having men ride a woman to get through a business at a conference? What's the matter with you?? Stuff like that gives me the creeps. Don't worry, I won't be reading any of your stories ever again.

Broken bed... Heather... Lynn... who the hell is Janice?

You REALLY need to proofread your stories before you publish them. Or was this plagiarized and you forgot to change all the character names?

..and if others don't like them, maybe they shouldn't READ them. They must have missed the "Revisited" to understand that it was the same story, just with alternate POVs and endings. Maybe is should have read "Revised"...

As for all the nay-sayers, maybe they should keep in mind that this is under the "Incest/taboo" section, and avoid it in the future if the subject matter is unsettling.

BTW, I like this ending muuuch better than the others because it brought in Janice's POV and no violence to the ending. GOOD READ!!! Keep up the good work!!!

I just read through both versions of the story and this is completely different than your other version. This is definitely one of my favorite stories on literotica and its not even a novella! 5 stars

Harold needs to fuck Heather and Janice needs to show her about eating creampie.

yes this is the right ending , hopefully there will b more to this story

I just wish it was a little longer butt loved the storyline great

Great fantasy, just totally unbelievable scenario. The rewrite was a lot hotter. The shovel scene was UGLY. Another chapter (or two) could be interesting. Jeff & Lynn have to come clean with mom. It looks like Heather is anally inclined. Surely, Janice needs more than ONE spanking for concealing 3? weeks of whoredom. Maybe put both families at a BBQ, where the girls piss in the pool... please?

seems like the slut wife confessed to her getting fucked while away and got her just deserts....strange about the video...did mum know about this or was she just not taking any shit from her.....but at least they both got a good spanking....now just need to see what happens to Lynn and her dad and do they tell the mother and include her in the games too.....so good giving the girl a good spanking then sliding his fingers in to her pussy and getting her off.....perhaps the two families then get together and they all get to fuck each other....nice one....

I don't like this story. Both mother and daughter are complete sluts one worse than other. If I would be Harold I would divorced Janice and and left Heather to do whatever she wanted to do without any support from me, financial or other. She did not deserved anything better. Trying to break her family? Seriously? I hope that I won't have daughter like her.

Janice is not any better, she shouldn't sleep with her boss in the first place and what happened to her later on was nothing else but her own fault. Besides now sex with her would be quite unfulfilling for Harold(or anybody else without oversized cock) since she became so loose that even guy with huge dick said she was. It was not an excuse that she had to sleep with god only know how many guys because her boss forced her. It was her choice she could sue him for molestation and blackmail or record his insistences and blackmail him herself. Very few husbands would be kind enough to accept her with open hands like Harold did. No one would blame those who wouldn't. Truth to be told great majority of those who would probably have a fetish for cheating. Well at least she learned her lesson and won't do it again unless of course she liked her punishment so much that she will do it again just to recieve it once more. Although I don't think that she would have been forgiven second time.

The rewrite is much better than the original.

Love the rewrite, much better than the original version!

Excellent work on this re-written tale. Whilst I enjoyed the first edition, I found this so much more fun and enjoyable. Keep your imagination and pen flowing and your readers happy and horny. I look forward to seeing more of your work in this genre.

Once again, congratulations on a job well done. Sadly I was only able to award 5 stars, it was worth so much more.

Cheers, Den

This chapter could use some more proofreading, what caught my eye the most was seeing Janice and Lynn's name switched around several times though mostly on the first page.

aside from the problems with proofreading, on the homefront, the rewrite was better, but I absolutely detested the addition with Janice in New York, both the whole scenario and having it fixed with a spanking, and overall it just felt superfluous and a distraction that really killed my boner.

The New York thing should have been a whole other story on its own, rather than intermixed with this one, and the husband's reaction could have served for a nice little revenge tale against the company and perhaps extended punishment for the wife, or outright divorce.

Please add an update with Lynn and Jeff and her mother. Also Heather and her mom . Maybe even a little swapping between both families.

I've left my comments about the improvements from the rewrite in the comments section for part 1. Here I just want to say: this story is FANTASTIC!

I've read some folks didn't like Janice's cheating in New York. I thought things were going to end quite differently when I read the initial cheating scenes. After reading them all, I think the Januce scenes are pretty essential to the outcome. She wouldn't have been nearly as accepting of what was going on at home without a really guilty conscience. And I don't think Harold would have been as forgiving had he not had his own misconduct in need of forgiving. The cheating wasn't okay, but could you honestly say that Harold's playing with two different teenaged girls (one of them his own daughter!) wasn't cheating? It's not like Harold should get a free pass while Janice is considered an evil whore. Nobody in this story is innocent. I thought the relationship twists were necessary for the depicted ending, and I thought the depicted ending was absolutely fantastic.

The original hit a little bit close to home, my first wife tried to orchestrate a similar scheme with our niece to bump up the divorce settlement. This rewrite is much more enjoyable.

Much better than the original

Couldn't get better

They say ‘ things that are worth doing are worth doing right ‘ , well you did it right . You carried along your storyline in its natural progression in the rewrite without taking it in a dissimilar , bizarre direction , as you had done in the original version . This version was brilliant and illustrated your very talented skill !

love this one and the ending was exactly what the wife needed and the duaghter also. maybe if more guys did that to the wife that want to cheat it wouldn't happen.

THE SPANKINGS AND CARNAL PLEASURES SHOULD HAVE BEEN BETWEEN HEATHER ONLY AND HER FATHER...NO NEED FOR FUCKING LYNN.....THE FATHER DAUGHTER JYST DRAGGED

Thank you. I can't say I want to be in either Harold's place, but this one is at least not to blame for his issues.

THANK YOU for the rewrite. I do like a happy ending in my fantasy reading.

i liked it overall ,but the hard spanking was a little too much for me .

It’s fun to see how you changed things up. It becomes as much a game of reversals as an effort to maximize the sexiness. Well done.

Fine! But maybe at the last, Heather should have joined them.

LeB

Especially since there were two of them they had a gold mine in exposing the boss’s perversions. They should wait for their bonuses and file suit against the company.

Wouldn’t need to worry about references since they would both be set for life.

That was just an aside to the main story, but needed to be made O. K.

Bill S.

Yeah, I liked the previous re-write and I like this one too even though it's a little on the extreme side. Looks like they are going to be a very happy family.

That was 100 times better than the original, much better ending.

Saw in a blog that you had re-written this entirely, but cannot find it anywhere

Can you provide link or site?

Thanks

Good job, thanks for sharing your work.

So the mom becomes the company whore who gets paid for fucking management and customers.

In the last paragraph she claims she won't do it again but as the company whore she can keep the promise only if she quits her job.

But what does that have to do with the relationship between father and daughter ?

Do not remember what her father did to motivate her to carry out this elaborate scheme but given her sexual attachment to her father at the end do not see why she goes ahead with showing her mother the video.

Neighbor girl Lynn being involved is believable;e. Having her father involved is not.

Cannot tell if you intended this ending as humor or not.

Man the stroy is good the writing too, but not for me... the two fathers scene and the mother gangbanged by 50 people or 50 times.. Kill me now and i had such hopes the first chapter.

Soooooooo much better than the original. Although I REALLY hated the way that Janice was treated by that asshole Roger, he needs a good kicking, preferably in the balls with steel toed boots!!!!