by twistedjoe37
I enjoyed reading chapters 1&2. I can't wait to read the remaining chapters.
Pacing is perfect. Giving us enough time to savor every word without leaving us panting and drooling for more. Take your time and do it right. Great quality makes for a great story. (pay no attention to the nit-pickers)
You wasted an entire chapter telling us what we already knew. Honey and Daddy fucked, Heather knew.
I think a good author can imply a long time span without actually creating a story of long duration. In this chapter, you should have had Heather act on what we already know she will do. Unless you plan an unexpected twist ;-)
With the nitpicker, unless you're plowing a field, don't go back over old ground too much. Think about how directors cut out scenes that slow down the plot, or states the obvious. You basically repeated the scene, when we were looking for action with the sister. It wasn't bad, just unnecessary. And when people give advice, they're not NITPICKING, they're trying to give constructive advice. Nitpicking is getting irate when someone says 'out' when they meant 'our.' Or when someone gets upset when someone puts a story in the incest category that has incest with a reluctant theme and gets pissy about it, when it could be in both. This story would have been great as a stnadalone, but it was just a repeat, oh am I repeating myself, and have all you little kids, scared of criticism, begun to criticize me, because I've already said that? Then, I think my point is made!
A good read. I also look forward to the story progression if you have intended this to continue.
Everyone. Heather is still very much in the story. Some things are worth waiting for.
TJ
I love the story and where you might go with it but I agree 1 paragraph is enough to cover the previous chapter if people need more they can read the 1st one first. Keep the story coming we love it I think your meant to do great things.
This story made me so wet, can't wait to read chapter 3! Keep up the good work as your stories make me wet!
WELL THIS IS GETTING BETTER I LIKE THIS KIND OF STORY NICE AND SLOW
AND TO THE FINAL POINT" SEX" !! THE WRITER HAS A GOOD HANDLE ON THIS STORY AND WHERE IT GOING ,YOU CAN ONLY WONDER HOW ITS GOING TO END ,BUT HAVE TO READ IT CHAPTER 3 TO FIND OUT FOR SURE,OR YOU WILL NEVER NO FOR SURE.
I GIVE THIS PART (CHAPTER 2) A 5 STARS PLUS......................"R".........................
Oh my gosh this is making me so fcking wet!! With every paragraph I would push another finger deeper in my tight pussy. Gosh., and when I read all the dirty talk, I just have to lick and suck my hard nipples!!!
I disagree with the others who complain about same ole' stuff. Wrong, pt#1 was a new innocent relationship, #2 was about an accepted & continuing relationship. Heather was in fact brought in; and as a matter of fact she threw her hat into the ring when she asked dad about his fantasies whereupon he lied because he is not planning incest. He's the one being reeled into it by the girls.
So; let the seduction continue.
I still do not see sluts; and don't see anything wrong with what they're doing or thinking. Life is a mess; we are here to help each other and share.
Thanks;
DKP
PS; one page doesn't allow for a lot of development. I've read stories with 20 - 50 pages and your storyline could go there very easily w/o bothering me. I'd read every bit of it gladly.
Please write more.
""
"Did I do good, Daddy? Was I a good girl?"
""
Fuuuuck. I got hard just reading that and hearing her say that in my head in her little girl voice!
...and I think I'd have to sneak down the hall to my other daughter in the middle of the night and crawl into bed with her, naked, and wake her up a bit to let her know I was there cuddling and sleeping with her for a while:)
More seeds planted, hehe! 🔜
ok I read it anyways I was happy Heather didn't get involved and actually ok with it!
He should shove his cock inside honey while they sleep naked, would've been better to keep his cum in her pussy