All Comments on 'Becoming Just Another Family Ch. 05'

"Becoming Just Another Family Ch. 05:" - Twenty-six Year Old Unorthodox Single Brother, Ryan and Eighteen Year Old High School Senior Virgin Sister, Rachel.

The whole contextual atmosphere, theme and character roles of this story have improved from good to moderately exceptional. The contextual atmosphere, theme and character roles have improved to smooth reading, from scene to scene, from visual to visual, and flow of readability is much better. There's foreplay now with the lover's--as if they're in love.

Rachel has missed her period for about two months, she feels lousy and finally confesses to her straight-laced mother, she sees her doctor, with her mother present and finds out she's now pregnant. Her parents almost totally ostracize her, her mother doesn't even speak to her as she takes Rachel back and forth to school. Several days later her brother, Ryan unexpectedly picks her up from school and takes her to his (and his friend Gary's apartment. Ryan has gathered up approximately half her belongs, tells their parents that he's taking Rachel to stay with him as his apartment.

Rachel's life is in sort's of turmoil between happiness and sadness. Being with Ryan, his understanding, his love for her and their baby, she tells her best friend Tracy things "are getting better," but she tells Tracy she will tell much later what ails her.

Writer 'datura48' seems to have brightened up his story telling tremendously from Chapter 01 through this Chapter 05. I'm actually grateful that I continued reading this far; I find his writing and overall vividness and visual imagery to be greatly enhanced.