Best of Both Worlds - FTDS

"Will you do something for me, baby?" she asked.

After that? She hardly needed to ask. "Sure."

"I . . . I want you to have my ass. I never should have denied it to you, and one of the things I most regret was not stopping that jerk from taking it first. Please? Do my bottom." She got up on her hands and knees, lowered her head to the bed, and wiggled her hips. "Please?"

I probably should have been mad, but damn, her butt looked good. I knelt behind her, and kissed her pale butt cheeks.

"In my purse," she said softly. "Lube."

She searched through her purse after I passed it to her, and came out with a small tube. "Here. You can't use too much."

I lubed her up, and did the same for myself. I was as hard as I'd ever been, both nervous and excited. It wasn't my first time, that was shared with one of my 'dates' after we'd split up. I only wished it could have been the first time for both of us. It took some work, but I finally worked my way inside her back door, and heard the sharp intake of breath, and the subsequent moan. I only had an inch or so inside of her.

"Should I stop?" I asked.

"No!" she was quick to respond. "Please. Do it. Fuck my ass, baby. Your ass. Nobody but yours ever again. Take it."

It took a while, but I managed to penetrate her completely. I was surprised to hear her moan for me, and it didn't sound like pain. After coming once already, my stamina was good, and I was able to really enjoy myself. I fucked her harder, and she wilted underneath me, slowly dropping lower, until she was lying flat on the bed, her legs spread wide apart, while I continued to use her ass.

"My ass," I growled into her ear, pounding her hard.

"Yours," she groaned. "All of me, always. My mouth, my pussy, my ass. It's all yours."

She was trembling underneath me, and I was surprised to feel her orgasm. It pushed me over the limit and I erupted inside of her, forcing myself deep, coming painfully, gasping.

When I finally rolled away, she made a beeline for the bathroom, not returning for a few minutes. When she reappeared, she cleaned me up, then cuddled up close. "Damn, honey, I guess you liked that. It's on the menu now, whenever you want."

I reached down and rubbed between her cheeks, feeling the crinkle of her back door. "You okay?"

"Perfect. A little sore, but I love that feeling, knowing it was you that made it that way."

I caressed her butt cheeks, squeezing them gently. I kissed her shoulders, cuddling up to her, and was surprised to find myself responding. I lifted her leg and guided my cock toward her entrance, both of us lying on our sides.

"Again?" she giggled.

"You mind?"

"Never. Take me, baby. Make me yours."

The words stung a little. I shouldn't have to 'make' her mine. She should have been mine all along. It didn't stop me from pressing inside of her, and having a nice leisurely fuck. I was in no need to come, and fondled her body, playing with her. My hand dipped between her cheeks teasing her opening, while I thrust inside of her.

She tapped me on the arm, and when I looked up she passed me the lube. It was hard to conceive. I pulled out of her, applied the lube liberally to my cock, and pushed into her bottom. She groaned, whimpering softly.

"Okay?"

"Sore. Slow and gentle, please."

I took my time getting inside her, then we just laid my side, my hips moving automatically, taking her slowly. I reached around and played with her pussy, and she shivered. "Naughty girl, aren't you?" I teased.

"For you, baby. I'll be whatever you need, whatever you want."

It seemed to take forever, and I had to add lube twice, but in the end, I pulled her backward, two fingers deep in her pussy, holding her in place, while I drove deep and hard, coming again for her. She rolled over on her belly once I fell out of her, opening her legs wide and moaning.

I could see between her legs where she was red, and the evidence of my finish was dripping out of her. I got out of the bed, cleaned up, then returned and took care of her, feeling her tremble as I cleaned her bottom.

She giggled. "Hope you got that out of your system. I'm gonna need a little break back there after that marathon session."

I pulled her in close, hugging her to me. "Sorry," I mumbled.

"Don't be. I loved it. I love you, baby."

"Love you," I whispered.

She clutched my arms to her body, and I could feel her trembling. I kissed her neck, her shoulders, tasting her. "It's all good baby."

Well, maybe not all good, but better.

~ * ~ * ~

Later that week, we hit a rough spot. I invited her for lunch, and she bowed out, claiming she had a lunch business meeting.

Yeah. I'd heard that before. All I could think was that she was blowing me off for someone else. As she'd done in the past repeatedly. I got upset, then angry. I started to wonder where the glassblower was. Was he back in the area? Was she cheating on me? Maybe it was someone new. Someone from work. She certainly had enough opportunities.

She had never mentioned anything about moving back in with us. Was there a reason? Did she need her privacy, for her other lovers?

I was a bear at work, and not much better at home. My daughter Jennifer mentioned that I was a grouch. I wanted to yell, "I'm a grouch? Your damn mother is a cheating whore!" I didn't.

I didn't call her for a few days. I'm not sure I would have if she hadn't called me. She reminded me we had family plans for Saturday. Against my better judgment I told her when we'd pick her up. It wasn't a bad day, but I couldn't help but wonder what had happened at that lunch. As for Sarah, she seemed blissfully unaware of my angst.

Another road bump, but we slowly made our way forward. She never asked what my problem was, but she had to wonder. It was ten days before we got together again, and I might have been a little rough when I insisted on having her ass again. It was mine, damn it, and nobody else's.

She didn't complain, and was affectionate afterward. But I think we both knew things weren't 100% between us.

Things might have been fine, but there was another lunch she couldn't make, on a Thursday no less. Then she canceled our night out, claiming she had to stay late to finish a project.

Monday I was back in my private investigator's office. He was surprised to see that we were still seeing each other, and promised he'd let me know when he had news. I tried to act normal, and we still went out as a family. When we were in bed, I found myself inspecting her body, looking to see if there was any evidence of her cheating. I screwed her slowly, trying to see if it felt any different. Was she stretched out? Did her new lover have a big cock? Was he better than me?

Two weeks later, I had the meeting with my P.I.

"Nothing," he said. "No evidence that she's doing anything wrong. She goes to work, and goes home. No lunches with anyone but you. She doesn't go out at night, except with you. In my professional opinion, she's innocent of any wrongdoing."

Innocent? I thought. How quickly he forgets.

Of course, I realized, she's doing it with someone at work. Keeping it in house, so I'll never catch on. Ha! I'm no idiot. I started planning on how to get someone on the inside to spy for me, when it hit me how crazy I was thinking. I was losing it.

That Saturday, was another family outing. When we got home, I asked Sarah to stay a while, while Jennifer retreated to her room.

Sarah's not stupid. "Is something wrong?" she asked. "I feel like we're going backwards. Did I do something to upset you?"

I sat beside her, and held her hand. "I love you, Sarah. Ever since we were kids. I thought we'd be forever. I'd have trusted you with my life."

"Me too, baby. You have to know that by now. There's nobody for me but you."

I nodded. "I know. You haven't done anything wrong. I know that. I've even had you checked on."

"Checked on?"

"Followed for two weeks. I believe that you're not cheating on me."

She was slow to respond, and I saw the tears start. "Why? Why would you feel you had to do that?"

"That's our problem. God, I wish it wasn't so. I don't trust you. Twice you turned me down for lunch. Once on a Thursday."

"But I explained that! I never even left the building. They brought us lunch in."

"I know. And then you canceled our date. All I could do was wonder who you were with. Who you were cheating on me with." I lowered my head. "When we made love, all I could do was study you, looking for any evidence, if you were loose, if you tasted different, if he'd left any marks."

"There was no 'he'. Nobody to leave marks. I've been with nobody but you since . . . since you caught me. Not once in over four years."

"I want to believe that. In my head, I believe it. But it doesn't change how I feel. It was driving me crazy. I'm out another couple of thousand dollars, because I can't trust you. I wish I could, but I don't. I don't think I ever will."

"Don't say that, baby. We just need time. You'll see. I'll be faithful, I swear. I don't need anyone but you, ever."

"Yeah. You made that promise before. Before family, friends and God. You didn't have much trouble breaking that promise. Now I wonder how many other times you cheated on me, how many men there are out there I don't know about. You didn't cheat in the last two weeks, but how long before you do again?"

"Never! I swear! It was only the one time, and I regret that. I would never chance it again."

"You have no idea how much I wish I could believe that. I can't afford to keep an investigator on you indefinitely."

The tears were running down her face freely. "What can I do, Bill? How can I convince you that you can trust me? What's it going to take? I'll do anything."

"I wish I knew. Don't you think I'd give anything to be able to trust you? To have the girl I loved back? To put this all behind us?"

"We can do it. I know we can. You'll see."

"Maybe. I don't know."

~ * ~ * ~

That was the beginning of the end. I don't think either of us wanted that. But it drove me crazy. If she didn't pick up her phone when I called, I wondered why. If she was five minutes late, I knew it was because she was with 'him'. I had tracked down her glassblower, it cost a pretty penny, but the bastard was halfway across the country.

It was a week later before we ended up in bed. I couldn't do it. She was in tears afterward, and I wasn't feeling any better.

I knew I was acting crazy, but there was nothing I could do to change my concerns.

That was the last time we went to bed together. We hung on for another two months, until she showed up on a Sunday morning.

I let her in, and she asked for a chance to talk. We sat down in the living room, and she was straight to the point. "You're never going to trust me, are you?"

"I don't know. I want to. But I don't know how."

"It's been nearly five years. Five years. How long is it going to take? How long are you going to string me along?"

"String you along? I'm trying. You cheated on me, repeatedly, did things with that bastard you'd never do with me. You lied to me repeatedly. You hid things from me. You destroyed us, and my trust in you. I could have walked away, but I'm trying here."

"Are you? Are you really trying? Or are you looking for an excuse out?" she snapped.

"Fine. If that's what you want to believe, so be it. Don't forget, you're the cheater, not me. You did this to us."

"I know. You're never going to let me forget that, are you? I fucked up, Bill. Big time. I'm not going to let that mistake define me. We could have a wonderful thing, if you'd only let us. I'd make sure you never regretted taking me back. I'd be the best, most loving wife and mother possible. You'll never find anyone better than me. Don't mess this up."

"You think I want this? This feeling of distrust and betrayal every time I can't get hold of you, when you're late, when you can't or won't meet with me. Damn it, I want to trust you! You've made that impossible. You did that, not me."

She stood and looked down at me, shaking her head. "I'm here for you. All you have to do is get your head out of your ass and realize I'm the best thing that ever happened to you. I've done everything I can to prove to you that I love you, and I want to make things right. Now the ball is in your court."

I didn't have any response, and let her walk out without saying anything. All I could think was that she was doing this on purpose. Trying to throw me off. The best defense is a good offense. This was supposed to make me think she wasn't cheating. Which of course meant she was.

That's what it had come to.

~ * ~ * ~

We tried for a while longer. Went out a few times, but we never made it to bed again. Five weeks later I went on my first date in almost a year with someone other than my ex-wife. It didn't go well. My head was still a mess.

A month later, I tried again. I was pleasantly surprised at how well it went. We had a lot in common. Bonny was seven years younger than me, but we had a remarkable number of common interests. It was on our third date, when I ran into Sarah in the same restaurant with a date of her own. I had to wonder if this was the guy she'd been with all along.

Strangely enough, it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. I was having a great time, and had high hopes for after dinner. My last date with Bonny had ended with a lot of kissing. I was counting on a little more after this one.

Over dessert, I asked Bonny if she minded if I said hi to my ex. She knew most of the story, and she nodded. I assured her that I wouldn't be long.

I walked over, and put my hand on the back of an open chair. "Hi Sarah, may I?"

I could see she was nervous, but that wasn't what I intended. She turned to her date. "Darren, this is Bill, my ex-husband. Bill, Darren, he's my friend Melanie's cousin."

I stuck out my hand and shook his, before sitting. "I don't want to cause any trouble," I said. "Darren, she's a great woman. Seriously. The problems we had at the end were mine, not hers. I loved her most of my life, and still care for her. So don't hurt her."

The look of surprise in both of their eyes was interesting. "Seriously, Sarah. I hope you have a great time. Don't let me interfere with your dinner. I just wanted to say hi."

I got up and returned to my table. I almost made it, before I felt her hand on my arm. I turned and felt her arms slide around me. "He's not you, but he's a good man. I think he really likes me. I hope you find someone as good."

"I may have. I guess it'll take time to find out," I said.

"Call me?"

"Of course. You've got Jennifer this weekend."

"I'm sorry. I'll always love you, you know."

"Me too. But it's not enough is it?"

She shook her head. "I guess not. I had hoped so. Thanks for stopping by. Now go back to your date, before she thinks you've abandoned her." She stood on tiptoe, and gave me a last kiss.

~ * ~ * ~

Bonny wasn't the one. For a while I thought she might be. She was fun, and dynamite in bed, but she and Jennifer never clicked. I thought that it might be my daughter's way of letting me know she was unhappy that Sarah and I had given up.

Heather proved me wrong. She and Jennifer are tight as can be. She's a widow and brought a six year old son along with her. She was cautious, and we were slow to connect, but I finally believe that I can love someone as much as I loved Sarah. And I would trust her with my life. Her boy is everything I'd hoped for in a son, and Jennifer adores him.

Sarah attended the wedding, along with her husband Darren. She was right, he is a good guy, and I feel comfortable with my daughter spending time with him. We're not friends, but birthdays and holidays throw us together on occasion, and I'm glad that Sarah found someone good and decent. He manages a Starbucks of all things; at least he's not a glassblower. Thank God for small favors.

There's not much else to my story. No big finale, no last minute discoveries of treachery and deceit. I had a lot of great years with a good woman, and raised a remarkable daughter. She cheated on me for a year, and as much as I wanted otherwise, that year of lies, trickery, hiding and deceit, destroyed my love and trust. Over time, the love recovered, but the trust was a permanent casualty. Que sera, sera.

It took a while, but I've moved on. I'm happy, deliriously so, with two kids, and a third on the way. My wife is beautiful, adoring, a prim and proper angel in public, and an insatiable demon in bed. My ex is a part of our lives, and I wish only the best for her, if only for our daughter's sake. As for me, I've been lucky. I've experience the love of a good woman twice in my life, and I'm hoping that this one sticks.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

While writing this story, the ending reminded me of something I read before. It took me a while, but I finally remembered that HDK's Things We Said Today. It was probably my subconscious inspiration for this particular ending, where an honest effort at reconciliation was attempted, but when something came up, the first instinct of the husband was distrust. Just sayin'.