All Comments on 'Billionaire and the Sisters Ch. 31'

by SteveWallace

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AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago

Any chance you could stop adding people and different locations and maybe focus on some kind of a plot besides this banal polyamory where societal norms are immediately erased and absolutely no jealousy can be around in kubuya land to provide an actual plot of working through things? Ive been waiting for the orgies to stop and for you to actually talk about the original characters. Focus on them and how many ways they can fuck random dudes like tom carter or deke etc. Deke had his purpose as an instructor now he has more. Boring. Tom met on an island. Didnt way too much too fast at that point and ruined everything set up until then and now when he should have been gone in the same chapter he was introduced hes still here just providing a dick and random devised orgy combo. Boring. You keep expanding the core base but really dont develop the plot besides trips and orgies. Boring. Where is this going besides elsa screwing sean. You started to maybe form something but reverted back to setting up adding more people and a different location. Im not going to bother with it except to scan over until something worthwhile to an actual plot arise besides more of the same: Orgies and more different combos with uninteresting peripheral characters. Mark and elsa arent in love anymore probably never were because I have yet to see a chapter since early on where they are together and discussing their love or their relationship. They just say im so in love but im going to screw some else now. How about refocusing on them and work your way out to the other girlfriends? You started to with sheila then back to lame combos.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Previous comment.

I couldn't agree with you more. I started skimming quite a few chapters ago in case their was something interesting with the plot lines. So I can do a quick scan in just a few minutes. Mark is becoming annoying as is Elsa. Sex is no longer important. It has reached a similar level to masturbating. Something needs to shake this up. Some of the girls should be finding someone who finds them more special than one of six. And what's with Elsa bragging about the entire set up with some coworker? That is the only section of this chapter that was worth reading. It can become a plot pivot point if it becomes the source of major attention be some media that got wind of it. And it all comes back on Elsa.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Interesting

I think it would make a better story if you start to focus more on Elsa and Mark's love story. I think they would continue to make the story. I think it would be amazing if Mark would start getting jealous of how many men sleep with Elsa. He keeps telling her not to leave him. Thanks so far.

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userSteveWallace@SteveWallace
A note on the story Loosening Up: Yes, it has many many characters. A PDF is available upon request listing the characters and placing them in some kind of perspective for the reader. Just email me (see below). Well over 18 ... even 30, hell 40 is way back there, oh hell, o...