All Comments on 'Camping Out'

OMFG!

That was amazing!

As a Boy Scout decades ago, me and a friend of mine (with whom I'd been in a relationship already for a long time) and fellow Scout would have a lot of fun when our Troop went on camping trips... we always tented two-gether...

I'll be honest, I didn't get as far as any of the good stuff. I know this isn't a professional writing site but there are a few things in here that made it hard to read. The two biggest ones for me were:

You change tenses back and forth several times in the first few paragraphs

You seem to have a genuinely weird hang up about peoples' race ethnicity

A lot of people probably won't notice the first, but it drove me nuts. You didn't just use different verb tenses, you changed literary tenses. It's like a movie changing back and forth between different kinds of cameras.

The other is... well, off putting for other reasons.

I would have liked to have read the story after an edit.

Didn’t care for the stuff talking badly about Jewish people.

Thanks for the comments. I need to clarify a couple of things:

I apologize for the error of not respecting tense sequence in the first paragraph.

The descriptions of characters includes their ethnicity. There is not intention of racism. It's simply descriptive.

No matter, again thanks for your comments.

Simon

It is not unusual for guys to enjoy each other on camping trips. Hunting and fishing too.