All Comments on 'Children of the Light Ch. 01'

It reminds me a bit of Starman and somewhat of some of the entities that you run into on StarTrek, I have the same problem with this being as I do with the StarTrek entities. How can a being with almost unlimited power and knowledge be clueless?

I get that it's connection to it's unlimited knowledge base, the Father, has been cut off. Yet it still seems to possess the knowledge of it's own experiences. It seems to be extremely old so it's experience must be vast. Yet it seems to never think much about it's place in the universe. All it considers is "the way". It is also a coldly emotionless and extremely deadly killer. If life doesn't measure up to it's planned needs, eliminate the life to allow for an new crop of different life in the future. It's a ruthless gardener.

What's in the future? It seems that life on "Earth" will not measure up to it's needs either. However, it needs the Father's permission to take sterilization actions. The Father is no more. If it is a rigidly programmed being it will reach an impasse, unable to act ever again. If it is not, why in it's eons of life has it not evolved a broader sense of purpose?

It's a little silly at times with the kids acting like kids while this being is playing out a scene on the cosmic stage. Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure in Heaven. I liked the story overall and it was quirky enough to elevate it another level beyond liking. It will be interesting to see how this evolves.

This is some of the best fiction i have read in here! A great start to the story, can't wait for more...

Took me by sunrise initially. Different than your other writings. Interesting start then evolved. Had to read twice to understand some of it. Keep writing!

I almost gave up in the beginning, was confused by the dialogue. Only stayed with the story because because it is written by Magmaman. Glad I kept reading. It even fits within the authors usual genre of the old guy and the younger woman. In this case it is a very,very old creature. Waiting for chapter 2.

An excellent job of telling a story from a completely alien perspective. And I love a story that makes me work a little. Good job!

A most amazing story, from a very creative mind. The only fault that I've found, is the lack of more chapters...Thanks for a great tale...5 stars!!!