All Comments on 'Chloe and the Dungeon'

Great writing, thank you. Am now going through your back log !

05 onwards.....um...this is going to be very enjoyable. Again thank you for posting your stories here.

What a great chapter! Can hardly wait for the next one. Thanks for a great read!

Very well written; explicit and very erotic. Not your usual style, but a change of pace from an author is always appreciated.

I enjoyed this foray into BDSM - nicely done story that shows the quality of writing that we have come to expect from you. I hope this leads into several more chapters.

She knew him. That's all she needed. The Police arrested him, searched his place and he was done. 20 years to life in prison. Idiotic tale of stupidity.

I like your story do wish at the very least she could of proved her point that he was bad for what he did to her he said he was one of the good guys even if she liked it it was still rape

Good Start on an Excellent Story Line.

First, I'd like to thank you for a well written story with impeccable prose, spelling, and punctuation. The only criticism I have is that I thought your story was way too short. You certainly could have made this into 4 pages with much added value.

I like the way you set up the story line. It looks like you intend to end it here. I wish to encourage you to continue this story since I think you have so many possibilities and delightful outcomes.

I love the setup of two powerful characters, both having the ability to hurt each other in the real world. I am intrigued by the notion that Mark told Chloe that she is a submissive. Exploring that line could be delicious, especially since she seems quite the opposite...at least in her own mind.

Your sexual writing is excellent. Your description of Mark's contraptions was well done, and your descriptions of Chloe's reactions was adorable. You drew out the sex very nicely. I think you could even occasionally expand the episodes with her gaining more resistance ultimately losing in the end again and again. That could be so sweet.

I think this story has lots of potential to become an excellent series. These characters could go in many directions from here. They can engage in banter jockeying for position, etc. He could decide to keep her, or he could let her go and recapture her. He could keep capturing her and putting her through various machinations of your creative mind. Each encounter could build on feelings and her submissive side and his control side. Just a few directional thoughts.

Anyway, thanks for such a good story and I hope you are encouraged to continue it.

- J

Like a lot of stories on this site it was a stunning fantasy story, breathtakingly vivid and terrifyingly realistic as well as completely plausible. As a rape fantasy it is so fucking sexy it’s off the charts.

Then again it’s not actually a rape fantasy, is it? It’s a fantasy rape and the difference in the order of the words is absolutely profound.

Just because he used Dom like protocols checking her circulation etc does not make him a good Dom or even a Dom, neither was it BDSM.

Instead it was kidnapping, drugging, sexual assault and rape as well as severe psychological distress. All done by a thoroughly corrupt politician. Nicely and cleverly done there saying he had the criminal help with some FBI cases obviously trying to present him as a good guy. Duh, of course the politician isn’t a good guy he’s as much if not a worse criminal than the gang boss he mentioned.

THE GOOD BIT...

I do however think that this is a brilliant starting point for a full novel in the Dark Erotica genre. I’ve seen way worse examples of completely moronic examples of the woman falling in love with the bad guy. The one that springs to mind is where the bad guy commits a revenge killing of a couple, shooting them point blank which is witnessed in full gory detail by the couple’s young adult daughter (late teen/ early 20’s). He kidnaps her, abuses and breaks her and somehow the moronic woman falls for the killer. FML, was available on Kindle Unlimited but I didn’t bother reading it, too fucking stupid for words. The point is you have the beginnings of a much much better story. It’s obvious to me at least that you’re a talented writer.

Tess (UK)

I cannot comment on the bdsm side of this but I loved the story and the way it's written. I agree with Tess (UK) it could be longer and definitely warrants another chapter or 3 as the relationship is developed and beomes more than just be a kidnap story.