All Comments on 'Click Ch. 05'

how on earth were you able to stretch this out over 5 long ass chapters?

I knew I was recognizing many places and names from another story But it all came together when Nick Shaw came into the story. I just wish the chapters came out sooner , all pain meds I take , I end up having to reread a couple chapters to jog the memory so I understand the new chapter.

Another great chapter :) I see now where this fits into your story universe but have no idea where you are going but I'm sure looking forward to the next chapter :)

Your Storyline bounces around so much it becomes a random series of short stories. None of which go very far, and are only loosely connected.

You could have easily spent two or three chapters just on the premise of the first chapter, and then went wandering all over with the rest of the story.

As it is the first chapters promise has become redundant / obsolete.

just like the rest of your stories.you start out with something interesting then go off on this weird fucking alien, prehistoric god, secret cult trip that makes me go wtf.

What the fuck was going on? Is that like a collection of short stories? Is it one story? shrug

You have a great gift in telling stories but it seems you have so much in your head that you bounce around quit alot. You have so many great story beginning within this story. Try and tie up all the loose ends then begin the next stage of your story. But still kept my interest.

Fucking amazeing!!!!!!!

I love your writeing style and story telling please never stop writeing these amazeing storys

The first two chapters were really good, then it went off the rails and just keeps getting more confusing. All this sci-fi nonsense is just boring and unnecessary and incredibly hard to follow. As far as I'm concerned, this story ended with Chapter 2

I'm so confused, this story has so much going on at once.

You have so many twists going on you are lost. Why way he having problems seeing in the janitor's closet when he has echo location and night vision. The one girl goes from on her knees to rolling over onto her belly!? And on and on. Now Carlotta is a twin !? You are working from a flow of ideas, but you need to chart out your story. It no longer fits together.

You have at least three different stories going on at once here. You randomly introduce new things out of the blue and completely drop old things without warning.

Also, you really need to get someone to proofread your work before you post. While your conventions (spelling, grammar, etc.) are decent enough to be able to understand your work, they are far from what I'd consider "good". You're right on the edge of having detrimental effects due to your lack of proofing. If you do have an editor, get a new one. Final note: Spellcheck is NOT sufficient proofing. At all.

I really gave it a shot after it started getting weird, because I loved the first couple of chapters. But when the story shifted from a well-written and highly arousing mind control/revenge story to this bizarre alien world conspiracy sci-fi, you lost me. I love longer stories with plot twists, but when the "Ooooo.... Nice!" stop and become "Wait... What?" it's just not arousing any more.

I added you to my faves after reading Mr Robinson, and I will keep reading your work, but this was just to much.

"I had to feel around blindly", really, for someone who can see in a "black" cave with NO light??

The title is a dead give away!

this story, could easely be published on paper, and sold through the regular retail chain. :)

Your writing is great. It has the twisted logic, that Roger Zelany used in his books "Chaos war".

Man (if that's what you realy are) you rock!

The sound a mouse makes when it leaves a story that abandoned it's category two long tedious chapters ago.

Much fun in this chapter and it's very yummy too. Thank you!

I do not care what the other readers are saying here in the comments...THIS IS MAGNIFICENT!!

Do I care the chapters are long...that there is confusion galore...that you are mixing Incest/Taboo and Sci-Fi stories?? NO, I DO NOT!!

I am enraptured with this!! So much fun, and the sex is 'adequate'...that is kinda tedious at times...still

Five**5**Star story!! 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🌋🌋🌋🌋🌋🔥🔥💥💥🔥🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌💞💞💞💞💞

Aaaannnndddddddd...If you have "clicked away" from the story/chapters, WHY ARE YOU STILL COMMENTING HERE?????!!!!!

MOVE ON, LET THE REST OF US BE!!