All Comments on 'Cracked Foundations'

What a truly lovely romance, I really enjoyed it, thanks.

Good luck in the challenge :D

And authentic on issues of construction and restoration in conflict and the sometimes mindless morass of navigating the differences.

Switching first person narratives back and forth between characters is jarring. It took my head out of the story a few times. Most lit stories are FPN because it is easy to write and works well with the linear progression of the average sex story. How about spicing it up with the third person point of view now and again?

The dialogue is too often cute, especially early in the story when the protagonists are just getting to know each other. And, there are some great huge paragraphs on page two that need breaking up.

Two good writers at work here.

The big paragraphs were not like that when we posted it.There had to have been some kind of formatting error when it posted that jammed everything together.

Will fix it latter. Thank you though.

Why do i only read about good people in stories. i wish they were there in real life too. maybe I am just a cynic nicely written though

and it begs for a sequel...

I think you need a sequel to this lovely story, in which the Historical Society, and in particular Norman gets what it/he deserves! I liked the detail you included about the project, but it wasn't consistent. There were times that it was very detailed, and others where things were glossed over. Still, an enjoyable read.

I totally agree with the "wanting a sequel" crowd! I enjoyed it thoroughly, and want to know who wrote it... guess I'll have to wait a bit, but if it's within the scope of reality, please carry on!

Very sweet. It made me feel good to read it.

One of the best I've read in the challenge. Would have liked the sledge to come out though. :)

I think one of the best things about the story was their interesting emotional pasts. Hers as a whistleblower made her seem strong and clever, even when she was tired and upset. His as someone who'd been neglected and in turn misunderstood his father, and who did his best for his own daugther so as to have no more regrets. They certainly deserved each other and a wonderful home.

Really enjoyed this story, love the build up and the back story, and the two of them coming together. Touching on the really simple things, like how Stan plays with his goatee when he's nervous etc. made me smile. I actually really liked the simplicity of two people not playing games with each other - ie. hard to get, not interested, etc. and once they got past their own insecurities simply said 'hey, I like you, let's get it on'. Man you killed me when he left her wanting at her apartment door, damn gentlemen damn you all! I was kind of hoping we'd get a couple of erotic encounters in before the end at least, but the story was great.

I am in agreement with everyone else calling for sequel, I'd definitely be up for reading that! Well done, it was a great story.

The writers of this story were Pennlady and MSTarot.

This is a romance story (and a good one).

While using her settlement to pay off the Hysterical Society is fine, I was really hoping for her to take down Bill Norman. Every sleaze ball like that, whether real or fictional, should be eviscerated.

Nice story though. Keep it up.

Right up until the end. Not that the VERY end was bad but the bit leading to it felt so rushed... I felt like I was cheated out of part of this story somehow... like I ended up getting the Cliff Notes version.

Maybe that's a result of the formatting - meaning each successive section actually having to wait on the previous to be sure it was headed the right direction... but I did like the way all the other parts meshed.

from homes & houses to relation ships. TK U MLJ LV NV

I too would have liked more satisfaction in the "Norman" subplot.

And you may have been told this (and I hope you can edit, either way) - the phrase you quoted is Greek, not Hebrew. Please note that I don't feel this takes away from the story EXCEPT for those very few of us who recognize that. I can even understand the character himself being mixed up about those languages.

Having said all that - this is a story that I will re-read and refer others to!

Too much unfinished business:

Norman really needs it broken off in his ass.

The evil ex needs to lose.

Rowena needs to be the third partner in their new contracting firm.

So where's chapter two?

I wanted that conniving little weasel from the Historical Society to pay! Even if it isn't part of the story, I loved it. Thank you!!

This one has correct words and correctly spelled words which make it a far easier ,

more enjoyable read than others.

It is still from the great story telling, great imagination the signed author shows in his or her other stories.

Thank You.

Note: Yes, I did read the profile saying a male is the author.

Thanks again, whomever you might be. -:)

It was much more romance than erotic coupling, not that anything wrong with that.

Very likable characters, and you nailed the rehab jargon...some experience there!

And quite enjoyed the changes in first person narrative.

Very impressive two author collaborative!! You complimented each other superbly.

And fact two probably why there won't be a chapter two, however satisfying it would be.

Definitely 5 + fave story, and author, and will check out Pennlady too.

I really liked the story. Just one little thing... The vocabulary for the structural elements of a house needs to he researched a bit. What you were calling beams are actually joists or rafters. A 2x member spaced at a regular spacing, usually 16" oc, and supporting the floor sheathing is a floor joist. If it supports the ceiling at the roof and is horizontal then it is a ceiling joist. If the member is sloped to support the roof then it is called a rafter. In residential construction a beam usually has multiple joist framing into it or it carries a load bearing wall.

I've been a structural engineer for 24 years and have designed and inspected many homes. I have also worked on many renovation projects.

I still like the story. 5 stars.

As Anonymous 11/20/14 writes below, the phrase:

"Ho tou Tektōnos huios"

IS Greek NOT Hebrew, but it DOES NOT say "is this not the carpenter's son" ; it is not the complete phrase from Matthew 13:55, in Greek it simply reads "the carpenter's son"

The complete phrase from Matthew, in Greek, reads:

"ouch houtos estin ho tou tektonos huios"

Of which the literal translation is: "not this is the of the carpenter's son" (word order in Greek is, as can be seen, quite different than in English). Of course, in English, proper word order, it reads: "is this not the carpenter's son" or "is this not the son of the carpenter"

Never the less, this story was a good read.

Very good story, but what would make it better is for Stan to start an investigation from the National Historical Society to give Norman his final comeuppance. I've personally seen how badly they can tear a new asshole into an affiliate that has allowed one of its personnel get THAT out of line.

Just my $.02

4 stars, only because of the ending. Needs to resolve both of their families discord.

Great story enjoyed reading it