All Comments on 'Dance of Death'

Holy hell this story was good when is the next chapter?

Lovvvvvves It!!! Doing Damn Good Buddy!!! Cla Clap. Lots Remind Me Of Sumone.....;)

It could have been so much more.

Sweat dripping from orange scaly skin isn't really all that attractive. Scaly skin probably shouldn't sweat, even if we're talking about an alien creature. It's counter intuitive and tends to interfere with the suspension of disbelief. On top of that, orange skin probably strikes most people as more weird than exotic. Ditto scaly. Even those with a bestiality fetish tend to prefer mammals.

Saying "Nechtrins are the most beautiful species" pushes an idea that a lot of readers wouldn't agree with, putting them off. The protagonist might think that and even say so, but you basically told the reader they should think it too.

Finally, I wondered if this wasn't some kind of lame spoof or weak joke. The green top (hair) and orange skin of the Nectarine, oops Nechtrin, girl. Who likes citrus fruit...

Fruit fetish?