Dead and Horny Ch. 12

"No!" Dana let out a cry and put her face in her monstrous hands. Her reflection was right, she had fallen so far from who she used to be. How could she ever manage to climb back out? How could she ever be worthy of Alex again?

You're finally getting it. The world is nothing but pain, and has been for a while. Why not stay in here with me and float? Her reflection grinned. There's peace in here, we don't have to worry about what's going on out there.

"I..." Dana was about to agree when a third figure appeared in the mirror.

It was Alex.

"Heya, Sparks." Alex smiled and the world came to a stop.

This was how it had always been with Alex. The entire universe could have been on fire, but as long as they had each other, it wouldn't have mattered. Without Alex, her world had come crashing down, and there had been nobody to help her pick up the pieces.

Forget about her, snapped the doppelganger. She is just a memory.

"No." Dana looked from Alex to the doppelganger. "How can you even say that? She goes far beyond a memory."

But she's gone! The doppelganger pointed at Alex accusingly. She died, and she isn't coming back! And we are never going to the other side to see her—because of you!

Dana swallowed the lump in her throat. "Even if that's true, how can you just choose to forget about her? What purpose does that even serve?"

Because I miss her! The doppelganger had tears streaming down her face now. I miss her and there isn't a damn thing we can do to fix it! Don't you understand? We lost! We will never be alive again!

Alex said nothing. The void suddenly felt like a dream about to crumble, and even Dana knew that what she was looking at wasn't the real Alex. But why was she even here? What had triggered this?

Go away! The doppelganger tried to shove Alex into the darkness. Don't you understand how painful it is to even look at you?

Alex sidestepped the doppelganger and pressed her hands to the glass. When Dana's eyes met hers, all she did was nod knowingly.

This Alex wasn't real, but Dana knew what she would have said if she had been.

The doppelganger tried to pull Alex away from the mirror. Dana stepped through the glass as if it wasn't there and grabbed her clone by the wrists.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I'm sorry for everything. But I can't live the rest of my life trying to be who I was. I can't be you anymore. It just isn't possible, it's too complicated."

Panic crossed the doppelganger's face. Of course. you can't be me again. You're not even alive!

"And neither are you." Dana embraced her former self. "You stopped living the moment that Alex did."

Her former self sobbed uncontrollably as Dana held her tight. The world around them shimmered, but she wasn't ready to go just yet. This entire trip she had been avoiding the awful truth about her situation. It was very likely that she would never be the same again, no matter what happened.

And she would have to accept it. If she didn't, she would continue to get lost trying to chase who she used to be. She didn't want to spend the rest of eternity trying to be that heart-broken college dropout, not when she needed to spend so much time figuring out who she was right now.

When the moment was right, she reached up and ripped the Dragon Seed away and tossed it into the void. In the darkness, she heard the roaring of a very angry dragon.

Dana's mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, her eyes settling on Lily in Alex's body. The freezing rain made her look like a drowned rat, and recognition filled her eyes.

"Heya, Sparks." Lily reached up and touched Dana's cheek. She didn't dare say anything else, afraid to break the spell.

They sat that way in the rain for several minutes, and Lily wondered if she would be fast enough to rip a hole in Dana before she could fight back.

"Alex." Dana's voice was little more than a whisper, and when she blinked, her eyes went from red to blue. There was a sudden recognition in her eyes, and she winced. "Lily. Help me."

"Always." Lily reverted to her original form and shoved her sharp nails into Dana's belly. Dana's eyes flickered back and forth from red to blue, but she held still as Lily searched.

When Lily pulled the Dragon Seed free of Dana's gut, they were both soaked in blood. Like a smoldering coal, the Seed steamed in the rain of the storm, its pearlescent surface covered in mottled black smudges.

Dana let out a loud growl, but was cut off when Lily kissed her. Mike's semen pumped through the hole in her tongue into Dana's mouth. She resisted at first, then wrapped her arms around Lily's neck and slurped greedily.

When they parted, Dana let out a gasp and covered her face with her hands. The ridge on her forehead was already smoothing out, and when she revealed her face, her eyes were no longer bloodshot.

"More," she begged, and Lily kissed her again. The Seed pulsated in her hand, and Lily realized that it would only be a matter of time before it found a way to call out to her too. She helped Dana stand and the two of them wandered the deck.

"Lily," Dana began, then looked around. "Where the fuck are we?"

"A ship," Lily told her. "Do you remember anything?"

"Um..." Dana put a hand to her forehead. "Only bits and pieces. I think...were we fighting?"

"Like cats and dogs."

"Lily, I'm sorry. I lost myself, I don't know what happened."

"It doesn't change anything between us." Lily squeezed Dana's hand reassuringly. "Don't worry about it."

"I remember being locked in the dark," Dana continued. "Primal instincts, rage, lust. I was out of control, I felt like I couldn't keep up with my own body. Oh, god, I wrecked a car by fucking it!"

"I don't judge you for the car, but keep the sky daddy talk to yourself." Lily found the original container and went inside. "Hey, toaster! I need you to hold onto something for me."

There was a loud pop and the mimic had become a backpack once again. Lily stuffed the Seed inside and zipped it shut.

"Don't give that to anybody until we get home, okay? Especially not Dana."

The mimic made a zipping sound that could have been in agreement. Lily turned her attention back on Dana. She slumped against the side of the container.

"I know I don't have any right to ask, but...can you help me?" She looked up at Lily. "I'm just...so..."

"Horny, right?" Lily laughed.

"Ugh. Yeah." Dana looked away.

"You know what?" Lily slid down next to her. "It's been a long week. I won't even make you beg."

"I thought you loved it when I begged?"

Lily laughed. "I love it when you do lots of things." She touched Dana's cheek, then ran her hand down Dana's body and stroked her thigh. "Any requests? I'll do anything. Be anyone. You just have to ask."

Dana let out a laugh. "Against my better judgement, I would like you to just be yourself."

Lily pressed herself into Dana while using her hand to spread Dana's legs. She let out a gasp when Lily nudged her clitoris with her thumb. They slid down the wall and onto the floor, and kissed each other as they took turns exploring each other's bodies.

They established a steady rhythm, taking turns fingering each other as they continued to kiss. Lily kept shifting her anatomy about just to tease Dana. Simple things like moving her clitoris, or changing the size of her breasts. She even gave herself three nipples on one breast that caused the zombie to laugh out loud before nibbling on each one of them.

Though Dana came close to orgasm many times, she would push Lily away and reciprocate. Surprised that Dana wasn't eager to get off, Lily spread her legs wide and relaxed while Dana's tongue played along her labia. The sweet heat of Dana's mouth radiated through Lily, and she trembled when she came for the first time.

Dana was moaning constantly now, but continued her feast. Lily altered her body again and allowed pleasure to tear through her body at every flick of Dana's tongue. Dana had been fingering Lily this whole time, but was up to three fingers now. With the addition of another digit, Lily came again, and then went limp on the cool floor of the container.

"Someone's in a giving mood," she muttered just as Dana sat on her face.

"Maybe I should have made you beg," Dana replied, then tapped Lily's forehead. "Horns, please."

"As you wish." Lily's horns curved slightly inward, and Dana grabbed them tightly. She gyrated her pussy on Lily's face, and Lily rewarded her by splitting her tongue in two. The upper tongue teased Dana's clitoris, but the lower tongue thickened and became a vibrating phallus that penetrated Dana's pussy.

This time, when the orgasms came, Dana was unable to hold back. She cried out, her voice reverberating inside of the container, but refused to let go of Lily's horns. Instead, she tightened her grip and squeezed her thighs so hard that Lily knew she could have cracked a human's skull in half.

After another half an hour of frantic riding, Dana came one more time before going limp. Lily grabbed her by the hips and slid her down until the two of them were face to face. She was surprised when Dana kissed her again, and then nuzzled herself into Lily's shoulder.

Neither of them said anything for several hours. The only sound they had was the passing storm and the creaking of the boat beneath them.

"I'm afraid of losing myself," Dana finally confessed in the darkness of the container. The storm had mostly passed by now, so the only other sound was the ship's engine and the slapping of the waves. "After what happened in the Black Palace."

"That was the Seed's fault," Lily replied.

"Before that," Dana continued. "After I ate what was left of those guys Tick Tock killed."

"The toaster killed someone?"

"Lots of people."

Lily listened as Dana explained what had happened in the basement, then looked over at where the mimic sat with newfound admiration. She knew that Tick Tock was capable of eating someone, but a hallway massacre was above and beyond what she expected.

"Anyway, once he was done, I was hallucinating, and I saw Alex. She told me I should eat, so I did." Dana sighed and shifted in Lily's arms. "And I know it was just my mind, I get it now. But the same thing happened after I ate the Dragon Seed. It was so easy to convince myself that what was happening was my own idea that I just went with it. I'm not even sure who I am anymore, and it feels like every decision I make takes me further from who I used to be."

Lily twisted Dana's hair around in her fingers while pondering her response. "It doesn't do us any good to cling to the past," she said. "Knowing who you were is important, but not nearly as important as knowing who you want to become. You need to give yourself a lot of leeway for the mistakes you're going to make, because it's possible you're going to be spinning your wheels on this for a very long time."

Dana shifted, then pressed her face into the crook of Lily's neck. "But what if I do something unforgivable? What if I can't live with myself when all is said and done?"

Lily stared into the darkness, her lips twisting into a grin.

"Nobody is beyond redemption, Sparks." She gave the zombie a squeeze. "And I'll be there to kick your ass when you take it too far. Every damn time."

It was almost a week before the ship made it to port. Dana was forever grateful that Lily had brought things to keep her occupied. The two of them spoke at length about many things over different card games (of which strip poker was always an option), and Lily had even brought an e-reader loaded with books along with a solar charger.

The car was a total loss, but still a better place to sit than on the cold metal floor of the container. When bored, the two of them would sometimes go digging through other containers to pass the time. Eventually they found one with a luxury SUV inside that became their new base of operations.

Lily filled Dana in on all that had happened at the house while they were gone. Apparently, Mike had been able to catch Lily up during her most recent feeding, and the tale of a pocket universe in the upstairs wardrobe was an interesting one. There were stories of magic rats, an evil fox demon, and apparently the society had gotten themselves blown up in a trap set by Mike inside a mirror universe. Lily had actually seen the blast from several miles away while flying over the city.

Dana would never have believed half of these things if she hadn't been tossed back in time by an elder god's wet dream (as Lily put it). Such was her world now.

Once they were close enough to the coast of California to receive a cell signal, Lily borrowed Dana's phone and made a couple of calls. The first one was to Eulalie and Velvet, to let them know that she had found Dana. The second one was to Mike.

Dana wasn't sure how to feel about Mike at this point. When she had left, it had been rather abrupt. He had been nothing but kind to her, so she wasn't certain how he would take her return. The conversation from this side didn't sound threatening, and if anything, she could hear relief in Mike's voice.

As for the magic they had collected, she had failed to get everything on her list. The Seed was the most important, so all she could do was hope that Ratu could find another solution to her problem. There was more than a little dread that the naga wouldn't be able to find one, and Dana thought back to the times she had been shot. Her brain had been so scrambled that her existence was nothing more than fragments of memories coupled with a few floating thoughts. What would it be like if she was destroyed completely? Would there be just enough of her left to realize that she was trapped in a horrifying state? Or would it be the blissful ignorance that came with complete annihilation?

There was no way of knowing, and she preferred to never find out.

Once back on land, Lily and Dana rented a car to get home. They took the scenic route, stopping only for gas and the occasional succubus snack. Dana got to see the Grand Canyon for the first time, a sight that should have filled her with wonder. Instead, it was only mildly interesting and unable to move her emotionally.

Yet another dead girl thing she would have to live with.

They were almost home when Lily asked if they could make a detour. In no hurry to end the trip, Dana had agreed. The GPS took her somewhere she was unfamiliar. When she looked over at Lily to ask about it, she saw that she had turned into a girl of maybe eight or nine.

"Dare I ask?"

Lily stared forward for most of a block, then nodded. "I want to see the building where the society was. I was in so much of a hurry to get back to you that I just kept on flying, but now that we're here, let's make one more stop."

"Do you think they're all dead?"

"I don't." Lily turned her head to look at her. "Hence the disguise."

"I'm not exactly inconspicuous myself," Dana replied. In response, Lily handed over a hat and a pair of oversized sunglasses.

The street was blocked off, so they parked the car and got out to walk. The building where the society had been located was fenced off with piles of rubble and fill dirt nearby. Dana's best guess was that the area was still being investigated, and she didn't dare get closer.

Lily held her hand as they circled the area, and there was no shortage of fellow onlookers. The building had been near a fancy business park. People were dropping by for a look while on a break. Circling overhead, a pair of drones watched the scene. They were unmarked, but looked expensive. She wouldn't mind getting the chance to mess with a drone someday. Perhaps now she would have the time.

After a bit, Lily led Dana back to the car. Once they left the area, the succubus took a deep breath and inflated in her seat to her usual size.

"So. what do you think?" asked Dana. "There's no way they could have survived that."

"You would think so, but stranger things have happened." Lily stared out the passenger window, her forehead on the glass. "Even if Amir was there, he survived. There's no telling what state he's in, but he's like the flu, that bastard always comes back."

"What of the others?"

"Anyone in that building is likely to be gone, but it doesn't matter. They were just a symptom of the disease, and Amir will rebuild. I've seen so many members come and go, they're all just a blur of bastards at this point. I can't tell you how many times they would send me out to blackmail or torment someone. Seeing that crater in the ground was pretty cathartic, knowing that they got theirs in the end."

Dana understood. She had felt the same way when Daryl had died, grateful to know that the man who had ruined her life couldn't hurt her or anyone else ever again.

"Do you think there's a way for Amir to ever truly die?" Dana asked.

Lily shrugged. "He and I will probably be doing our dance for centuries yet. That's what happens when you get tied to someone, you never truly escape them. Even if he did die, the damage that has been done can never be changed. It's a painful truth, but acknowledging it is the first step toward healing."

"I'm digging insightful Lily," Dana told her. "Who would have thought there was more to you than just a horny little devil?"

"Eat my whole fucking ass." Lily sounded mad, but Dana could tell that she was grinning.

Silence between the two of them made the last twenty minutes of the drive feel longer than they were. They drove by the pizza place where Dana had worked before dying. It was as busy as always. In a small detour of her own, Dana drove past her old apartment. The home was for sale, yet another sign that the world would keep moving on with or without her.

When they parked the car outside of the Radley house, Dana let the car idle for a few minutes, while her thoughts tumbled around her head.

"Are we going in?" Lily asked. "I won't rush you. We can keep driving around, you know. Hell, we can go up to Canada for all I care, just keep driving until we reach snow."

"I just...it still feels weird, you know? I'm supposed to live here now, but I also don't have much of a choice."

"There's always a choice. It's just that some of them suck." Lily leaned back in her seat. "And it's not going to be forever. You at least need to go in there and talk with Ratu."

"Yeah, I do." Dana put the car in park, then turned the key. When the car went silent, she looked over at Lily. "Promise me something?"

"Maybe." Lily arched an eyebrow. "I never make promises before I hear them."

"Promise you won't ditch out on me. If you ever decide to just pack up and go, tell me first. Let me decide if I want to go with you."

"Only if you promise me the same. I'm going to leave from time to time, cause a girl's gotta eat. But I'll always come back to see you. You have my word."

"Thanks. Guess we should go inside and face the music."

"I do have a question, something that's been low-key bothering me," Lily said. "When I put you in horny jail, how did you get into the car without breaking the windows? Wasn't it locked?"

Dana reached behind her seat and patted the mimic, who was shaped like a large suitcase.

"Tick Tock opened it for me. Used those tiny little arms of his to undo the locks."

"What a clever little toaster. Always looking out for you."

Dana nodded. "That makes two of you."

Lily gagged and made a barfing sound.

They got out of the car, and Dana reached into the back seat to pull out Tick Tock. As they walked up the front walkway, Dana marveled at the fact that the front of the house was now a different shape. Not only was the yard thick and lush with wild gardens, but the house now had a third story.