All Comments on 'Desperate'

decent effort tainted by lack of editing

i loved it, wish i had a josh and my husband was as understanding as ray

and just think she gets paid for this wow, i would almost pay to have that job and josh and the new young black lol

Story was ok but moving from 1st to 3rd person, almost at random, detracted from the story itself. This needed some serious editing.

Word usage was also aggrevating: "except" and "accept" don't mean the same thing.

Learn your craft; learn how to tell a story.

Overall, this was an extremely good story. Not disgusted by the big black cock, it fit the story just fine. Maybe a little editing help would be nice but you have written a good story. It is the type of story that cries out for a second chapter but that is up to you. Well done.

Those uneducated animals can hardly wipe their asses. They lick it clean.

Loved how the couples were able to mutually work everything out great and erotic read.

Thank you

Danielle

if she loved Josh more she should have moved to the island with him, if I was Ray and she had Josh's baby I would leave her

Great storey, loved it. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Excellent story. The desperation took them to unusual places. but it all worked out just fine. Sex was enjoyable for all concerned.

I loved it. Reading about the desperation and then the happiness and success of those 2 young people was priceless. Their continued happiness showed they made the right decision and were the better for it. Great writing and very sexy and erotic. Those emotions were felt in the words leaping off the pages. I could read stories like these all day long,.