All Comments on 'Dream Drive Ch. 10'

Awesome just got your book

I've asked for confirmation, and O_R has said it will most likely be multiple years, due to school.

On the other hand, he's also said he has some other ideas floating around in his head, and he's got the sequel to Contractors coming up Soon^(TM), so it's not like he'll vanish off the face of the net for the next few years, alright?

:P

I wish him the best of luck.

o7

1:30 in the morning and bit drunk. Lo and behold, the final update of dream drive. I have work tomorrow morning but I had to read it. Thanks. Been waiting for ages

I've been waiting for this for a while now. Excellent finish to a great story. I understand that you are continuing your other work but I am looking forward to the next part of this one as well. Thanks for the hard work you put into it.

Ravenstorm

I love your story, it is qualitatively worth purchasing. Were you to continue the series as purchasable books, I for one would be buying. Thank you and good luck with your future endeavours.

good shit as usual

Thanks for the final chapter

A great ending for the first section of this awesome story. I eagerly await more, though I know it well be some time, I really appreciate you saying that you will come back to it eventually. Here's wishing you the best for your future endeavors. ^^/

It's me your little brother ur story is rich in quality and imagination ur the best

Also read contractors. All great. Going to look for similar well written books / stories. I'f any of you have recommendations please share.

Keep up the good writing OR. Looking forward to more.

Thank you for your time and effort, i look forward to the next story you publish.

----- As for the person that asked for suggestions:

https://bato.to/forums/topic/22141-where-can-i-find-recommendations/

Lots of good stories here from a range of websites/communities, and a some not so amazing ones also.

Okay, so I, a lazy fucker who never comments, rates, etc on stuff like this. But holy shit, this has been one of the most thrilling entertaining surprising and flat out exciting stories I have read. Ever, and I read a LOT. A lot of published books have a more professional overtone to them you notice after reading stories unpublished stories online. This one however, rather then been full of mistakes it's got a raw feel to it (in a fan-fucking-tastic way) it has so much damn potential I wouldn't be surprised if you made this into a book series. It's been great reading it, will be looking into your other books too. Yeah. Sorry for the long ass comment, just... It's fantastic. Well done.

he needs some agility and compulsion though

Great story. Chapter 10 was outstanding. Just sad that it will take some time before there will be available.

Thank you Over_Red **************

If it can be called a subgenre of sci-fi/fantasy, then the whole "video games but real" niche has a new entrant. I feel pretty confident saying that with a professional editor and dedicated attention from the author this could become the best story of its kind. It's already (IMHO) better than Sword Art Online and at least competes with Ready Player One. I will eagerly await whatever future the story has.

Why must it end.

The short story is that this has made me feel like no other story I have read before. I am very interested in the books you have written and others you will write in the future, in this series or any other.

This is a rant I wrote after reading chapter 9 about the entire series so far:

This is hands down the best science fiction I have ever read. Much of the reason is that you seem to know what you are talking about in every subject, from horses to economics, from serious futuristic technology to medieval weaponry, and from Native American tribal traditions to gamer and modder culture. Most of all, I like your take on what a real genius is, and how they act. I have never seen comprehensive knowledge of so many aspects of the world from a sci-fi author before. I am generally not a huge fan of science fiction because the ridiculous and frankly quite stupid fictional worlds most science fiction authors generally build draws attention away from the real point of the story. The fantasy aspect you create in the game world is excellent as well, and it mixes beautifully with the video game theme. Although a devoted fan of fantasy, I have always found magic and the mystical worlds a little hard to connect with on a personal level (I don’t have access to powers or magic). Offering a video game interface to connect the users to the magic makes everything so much more relatable without taking away the wonder and power of the fantastical world.

This is also one of the best works of fiction I have ever read in general, due to the development of Charles, Rachel and MIVRA. I started to get a little bored, with Jackson and Chani (who are quite frankly very classic heroes, though relatively well done ones) slowly accomplishing very little in a world with so much promise until I met them. Charles is approaching the quality of Raskolnikov from Crime and Punishment (possibly my favorite character in fiction). I love how Charles is so evil, yet so good, so caring yet so unkind, so hateful, but so dedicated. I have always been fascinated by strong artificial intelligence and I was simply blown away by the stunningly well put together A.I. character of Mivra. I have a strong personal aversion to most A.I. characters because they seem like a computer program given consciousness through sheer complexity, which is both ridiculous and ethically disturbing. Mivra seems like a human given computer abilities but with human restrictions. Not only do I think this is this more reasonable technically, but it also makes for a legitimately interesting character growth. I am personally quite disconnected with Rachel, because I have never really known anyone with her particularities in real life, but even still, she was inspiring. Quite frankly, I am so inspired by the beautiful imperfection of these characters that I really feel no pressing need to continue reading the series, because I am just basking in the perfection you have already created. And I loved your plot as well. I have never felt the same about any other work of fiction (other than perhaps Crime and Punishment), so you must be doing something right.

I really wish that this chapter had more material on the personal relationships. The battle scene was great but it dominated and while it's definitely important, its not whats been holding my attention (I mean, it's not like Jackson would end up dead. That wouldn't make for much of a follow up).

That's not to say it's not a story that doesn't deserve 5 stars. Really hoping that it won't be years before you continue. And of course signing up for the mailing list. Also, while you work on the sequel to you published book, you could consider publishing this as book 1 free and writing a sequel that's not. Would certainly pay to read that. Either way, best of luck in pharm and I'll be waiting. Oh and certainly buying the book that's published and sequel as encouragement!

I want to thank the author for both writing a wonderful story, and for letting me participate in a small part in the editing of the last few chapters. I highly recommend that readers check out his published book, Contractor, and be on the lookout for its sequel. I'll be excited to buy his next book, but I'll be even more excited knowing that hopefully he'll be able to come back to this story!

I want to hold this story in my hands and read it on paper! I hope that someday you can get this published! Eagerly awaiting more. Will be very hard.

What started off as a kind of interesting and better written SAO story evolved beautifully into one of the greatest stories that I have ever read. It started off kind of rough, but grew so organically and seamlessly that I am one hundred percent confident that the re-write will blow our minds. If the radioactive crap which is 50 Shades of Grey came out of a shitty Twilight fanfic, then I see no reason that this incredibly well written tale on an erotic website can't erupt out of its cocoon and sit shoulder to shoulder with the greatest works of fiction out there. I will be converting these ten chapters into an ebook format and rereading it whenever the urge to dissappear into Isis and GAU Boston appears. I will probably edit the sex scenes just so I can share this with as wide an audience as possible. I am honored to have followed this adventure in your wake and eager to explore your published book off of Amazon. Good luck in pharm school, and I hope it's not too mean to wish that you have a dramatic change of heart and write full time instead of possibly saving lives. Yup. Probably too mean.

I literally spent a whole day and read through your entire series straight through in one sitting.

This has been more enjoyable than most of the books I've read thus far. Please continue this at your earliest convenience! I cannot wait for further installments.

If this were a published book, I'd definitely pick it up.

I know a New York Time bestseller when I see one. You got the potential to make a great serie out of this. I love it 11 on ten.

The Cult still remains, waiting for the High Priest Over_Red to furnish us with more of the Holy Scriptures. Also, Those cliffhangers really are evil.

I really think you should compile this and have it published as a proper book, it is one of the best stories I have read in a long time. I even re-read chapter 1-9 before starting number 10!

If you do get to updating it and publishing it, I just want to say I missed a longer end to see a bit about the characters, the tribe and such. It felt like it ended a bit abrubtly.

Dream Drive just 'cost' me some essence ...errr... days in writing up my PhD thesis.

Some much for stuff taking time, and school, university what so ever;

However, I don't begrudge the two days of reading - they were well spend with a splendit story, containing great plot, mixing together a bunch of my favorite topics:

-Medieval themed world with magic

-role-playing (games)

-computer science

-future technologies

Well done, this definitely has made it one of my top 5 Literotica reads!

Best

-Shaya

Thanks for this wonderful story!

I really would like to buy your "Contractor" books - but you sell them only in Amazons kindle format?! :-(

Best story evver.

Hi, loved your story as always. I especially liked how you handled this 'final battle' with this chapter, a very epic way to close this first story arc. The excitement interspersed with a little breathing room to let me regather before you jacked up the adrenaline - very nicely done.

Also, it took me a couple of weeks to read this chapter, as usual. But I'm off to get the pdf compilation and donate.

Love this story. Love you for writing it. Thank you so much ^_^

Chapter 10 was so good! I would have liked a resolve to the chaki/rachel situation but oh well.

When writing this emotional of a story, some humor to lighten it up was a excellent idee. "They are generous with their halberds" is a good example of how you did this well.

From my perspective, focus on part 2 not rewriting :)

Would love me some more dreamdrive, keep em coming!

The only story that has ever had me more excited to read it through a second time. Purely because I know what's coming.

(Corny, I know, but my heart literally hurts when I think about how good this is)

I need more don't stop!!!!!

Simply great! I can't await the next episode!

Thank you an engrossing tale.

I have purchased your book and i will provide feedback once i have read it.

I look forward to your next installment.

Cliquegge

I absolutely loved reading this story. It is my goal to one day write with quality like this. You're an inspiration and I look forward to reading your published book and all that you write in the future.

One of the best i've ever read..

You have a outstanding

imagination, and writing talent.

i don't think i've ever read a

better characterization and their

developement, and believe me

when i say i have read a lot.

i have one

expectation though.

Not really a expectation but a

demand. please make Rachel

Jackson's second wife, in case you

don't plan to do that. Because the

Jackson-Rachel-Charles triangle

will make this very gripping plot in

further arc. Please. And i think

Jackson's gonna need Charles to

uncover this whole mess.

thank you

This series is one of the absolute best stories on here and I can't wait for more. Also what's the name of your published book I want to look at see if it would interest me.

Well, shit! I sincerely love this story, your imagination kept me enthralled since I read chapter 1! All I can do is sincerely plead you not get writers block and finish this stupid story because if I don't know how it all ends I might go mad!

Just don't forget about this story! There are thirty thousand people waiting ;)

Please go on with this plot!

I've read your ebook "Contractor" and - while it's sure nice to read - i find the Dream Drive plot much more intriguing!

Take this story, add the next story arc and get it published as a ebook (perhaps with even less sex scenes ;-) - at least me, myself and I will surely buy it!

Thanks for this excellent story!

regards

looking once in a while in hope for an update cause this story is I have to say one of the best ones i´ve read in a while.

It was amazing... Eagerly waiting for Tatanka ska in his next episode of ... DBZ..;-)

Easily the best story I have read in a while!

This has to be one of the best ... I just couldn't stop reading to post a comment till I ran out of material , and with that I so hope you find time to continue this fabulous story and bring it all back to life in the dreams of our imagination. .

I've read A LOT of stories on this site and this is a gem. Glad you informed us of a hibernation instead of just disappearing and you even gave us a time to start checking your profile for new works thank you for this story.

A Loyal Reader

Wow, what a great story! Thank you again for all of your time and effort that you have freely shared with us. As with all of the best books I have read, not only am I sad that I have reached the (current) end, but throughout the rest of the day I keep getting distracted remembering scenes from the story.

I will say that by the end I really enjoyed the time spent with Charles' character, and not just in Isis (although that was the best part). I love that he is so very competent at nearly everything that he does, and evil enough to be interesting, but his love for Rachel keeps my empathy engaged. I think there is some editing that could be done in earlier parts of the story to improve his parts, but given the choice between that and more story I'd choose more story. ;-)

Great ending with the climatic battle scene, plenty of opportunity to show Jackson kicking army ass and showing off his special abilities (and learning new ones - that's something that should continue through the entire series!), but having obvious weaknesses that smarter enemies take advantage of also (e.g. dependency on spear). I really liked the soul tear cliff hanger and solution with a new game mechanic - that exemplifies my favorite parts of this story!

I love that you saved Commander Tell'ad, and that Rachel bonded him. I think it was not only satisfying from a personal level because he is a character I have grown to love (honorable even while forced to work for the bad guy), but also smart to give Rachel a companion to help balance her jealousy of Chaki's relationship with Jackson so that they can work together going forward.

I was also impressed with the big reveal of Lucifer, and conveyed well his personality, both intelligence and flaws, and the overwhelming power and "this guy could crush you like a bug". And he's the one Jackson is ultimately working for at the moment! LOL Just fantastic. And the revelation of what the deal is with the tower, who is in charge of building it (it has always been cleverly ambiguous throughout as to who exactly the "angels" at the top are) is also well done. A demon revolt was definitely not on my radar of possibilities! I also like the twist with all Isis players being condemned to hell for their powers. All of this subject to Lucifer's lying, of course, but some obviously true. The death of the gamer when Charles crushed the chip was successfully very disturbing - well done!

Overall, definitely my favorite story on the site, and among my top anywhere, honestly, commercial or not. I very much enjoy the erotic parts, but they are not the main draw. I eagerly look forward to checking back here in the future and finding the next story arc started! Thanks again.

This is the second time I've read Dream Drive, and it was fantastic, as always. I cannot stress enough that you should continue this story.

I know that a lot of people have complained about the parallel Charles-themed story line. Regardless of whether you keep them as is, change them, or get rid of them altogether, I have this word of advice for you: whenever you have a parallel story, switch back and forth between the two storylines more often. It will help keep a reader on the edge of his/her seat, and it will help prevent either story (particularly the secondary story) from bogging down. In addition, it forces you to break up each story, which is helpful to the reader so that they know when there's a good stopping point.

I honestly loved your story. It reminded me of good manga. Especially Sword Art Online and a dash of Ghost in the shell with a tad bit of the Matrix for good measure. Just glad Jackson wasn't the "chosen one".

I guess the best compliment I could give you is that I would have paid for this story and its inspired me to want to start writing again.

This stuff is totally awesome and I actually stumbled on it after that reference from Tristan's Tale.

Your material had all the major stuff I look for in a book. Terra incognito: new terrain, strange costumes and costumes but easy to relate to. Personality: each of your characters have their own styles and reasons. Tai jitsu: awesome combat skills and fight scenes and weapons. Cool and logical magic.

I better stop writing before I create a spin off.

Awesome job awesome job.. I'd totally pay to read this

One of those totally brilliant all time favourites, whose name you always remember... very few stories have caught me like this... Danica.... Shadow Dagger... and now Dream Drive. Please please please continue.

Hmm... I could've sworn Jalak died in the second lightning blast. Anyway, that was a great conclusion to the story thus far. Great magic system, cool skills, and well developed characters. Just hope Jackson doesn't let Rachel get between him and Chaki. I'm not against a harem, but if it involves Jackson pissing Chaki off by taking Rachel's side when the two girls have a petty argument I would be extremely unhappy. To say the least. She is his fiance after all. Maybe he can be impartial later on, but not with a soon to be wife.

and i anxiously await... yet again tied to world created by another. will i see the end?

Hi! This is a fantastic story, so detailed and so clever. I feel that its of the quality that it could be published and sold in stores or kindle or whatever.

I really hope that you will consider continuing this story if you aren't all ready working on the next story arc.

Fantastic work, please keep up this creative tale.

-Nate

I Absolutely enjoyed the ride till now(atleast that is what it felt like). Anyway can`t wait for future developments. Peace.

I just blew through this entire series in the past couple of days. I finished last night, and I feel like a piece of me just died with the realization that there won't be anymore updates for a while. I decided to sleep on any comments, lest they just be mashing the keyboard attempting some kind of praise, and instead producing nonsense letters strung together.

I loved this story. I was completely enthralled. You have a beautifully crafted world with well thought out rules, and have a great cast of characters. I find myself wondering if Jackson and Charles will be able to cooperate in this new world, or if they really are destined to fight one another to the death. I worry for Rachel, being caught in the middle.

I want to know what selection Rachel picked for Tell'Ad in her bond. Likely Legion, but I guess I'll have to wait an indeterminate amount of time to find out.

You've given readers -- particularly ones who are also gamers -- a completely second level of engagement by consistently posting Jackson's stats. I'm constantly wondering what his next upgrade will be, practically frothing at the mouth whenever he drops Essence into something. I want to see him do new and exciting things, but still love see him being temporarily outsmarted, or outmatched by superior skill, such as against Katran. I also love seeing him using such moments to his advantage to further himself and monopolizing on the ability to grind his way to greater heights.

I look forward to the wedding -- I'm really hoping Jackson doesn't find a reason to waffle about it any further and just commit already. Is it quick? Sure. But he should just buckle in and enjoy the ride. His best decisions seem to be based on impulse. It's only when he begins to overthink things that he stumbles.

I probably found this story at the worst time. I am in the midst of finals week and wanted to read something for a quick break. I checked this out and have been awake reading this til 3 in the morning, I just couldn't put it down. Eventually I fell asleep and continued reading when I woke up until I finally caught up. This was an amazing story and I can't wait to read more. I don't think you need to make any changes and I wonder where you will go from here. I am off to take my finals but afterwards I will have to track down your other stories in hopes that they are at least half as good as this. :)

FTaku, out

Love the story! Can't wait for the second arc. Hope to see you back soon!

If you wrote the whole thing again. I really can't point out what I disliked. But the whole thing left me with broken expectations. The romance, the mysteries, the characters, the developments in the story. I don't even know where to start. But one thing's for sure, I feel disappointed.

A clif hanger means that a story does not stand on it's own. Writing a series is one thing, but writing a series of books that do not stand on their own, is unkind. When i buy a book i check if it is one of those and i either do not buy or buy the whole series in one buy.

Btw, to my ears shined is wrong, should be shone

I'm not a gamer, so some parts were a little foreign to me, but I still enjoyed this first arc. I'm concerned about the relationship between Jackson and Chaki. They appeared to make a good start with a chance at a solid future, but now Jackson seems to have distanced himself again. And, I do not like the character of Rachel. I'm fine with flamboyant personalities with idiosyncrasies. However, she seems flat out rude and overbearing. It also comes across that she's as bad as her brother when it comes to jealousy and behaves like a spoiled brat. Please, don't let her wreck the relationship with Jackson and Chaki. I think that if that happens I'll just have to give this up because Jackson will have not been the character I imagined him being. But, it is your story, so we'll just have to see where it goes. Looking forward to more.

Really enjoyed the read, the potential for the sequel is staggering.

Can't wait to see what you come up with

A lot of stories on this forum get's mixed up with sex and hence loose the sensual charm , you have written a brilliant piece and worth re-reading.

A fabulous first arc, wish to give us a second arc soon instead of leaving us on a cliffhanger, but since it's been more than 1 and half year between the next installment and this, this definitely will put a bit of strain to keep following up.

Pls finish this for god's sake

The people complaining about Charles are morons, he's the best viewpoint in your story, even if his storyline is placed somewhat awkwardly. Don't pander to the complainers, he's one of the best heroes/villains I've ever read (I refuse to narrow him down).

I could not put my phone down for hours at a time! I can't tell you how many times my phone ran out of battery and caused extreme heartbreak lol! I wish I had the skills and abilities to get this turned into a movie haha! I gotta say, I was hoping that at the end after all of the build up, Rachel Jackson and chaki got down and dirty lol! That could make for an interesting scene!

Please continue writing this fantastic series!!

sad story is dead

I know you're super busy with school, but I hope we see more of this story. I have fallen in love with the world and characters. It is also very well edited. I found no mistakes which made me happy.

Sure there may be some discrepancies between certain religions and some books that you are refer acing but in the end this is your story. Your world your rules. If people don't like it then they can just not read. Simple as that

I bought your book. You picked the wrong career. Have you even seen the kind of stuff "authors" can sell online these days? You're leagues ahead of half he scifi/fantasy on the Kobo store.

Just had to say...I really liked how you handled the Chaki-Jackson-Rachel triangle. You didn't write Jackson as the kind of guy that would pull shenanigans - and he didn't.

That little dig during the flashback, where the Doc suggested putting Jackson and Rachel together and Charles refused...wow. Maybe the single greatest moment in the whole story.

That Rachel didn't end bonded with Jackson. I will probably missspell his name, but "Thallad" is just not very interesting compared to Rachel, Jackson and Cheeki, and I think having Rachel be part of the Bond would open for some really interesting story later om. It could also easily fit in with the tribal costums of having more than 1 wife.

I rarely comment anywhere, but your writing is top-notch! If you rewrite this and package it as an online book, I'll definitely buy it. I'm thinking this and the concluding stories would make an excellent trilogy and you can put me down for a purchase of all three books.

I'd really like to see Jackson, Chaki and Rachel remain in their three-way relationship. It would be very interesting to see all three of them married, both because of the difference between the two women and because Charles is on the way. His arriving to find Jackson and Rachel married (not only to each other, but also to Chaki!) could make for an exceptionally interesting subplot to the whole saving-the-universe main story.

Thanks for writing and please come back to continue this excellent story!!!

As I stated last week, gave your first chapter a read, since I've never veen into games, didn't expect to like you story...Glad to say I was wrong...Thank you for the time and effort you put into it. Looking forward to checking out your book.

I enjoyed the ride so far and hope you continue the story. Thank you for a well written and intriguing story.

As an avid gamer and reader, I thank you for posting this awesome story for us readers to enjoy for free. That's awesome of you! I can see why this is one of the most highly rated stories on Literotica.

That being said, a pat on the back won't do much to improve your writing, so I'm leaving you with these comments to ponder:

The story dragged at times, especially the entire chapter devoted to explaining Earth to Chaki, after Jackson logged off and brought her with him.

Rachel is an experienced gamer, so it's highly unrealistic when you have her constantly spending 100 more points in Agility without ever raising her other stats, especially Vitality. Even mediocre gamers know that they want to rapidly move away from the starting 50 Health Points. She was also made aware early on by Jack that the soft cap is 40 points. I feel that she would have raised Strength to at least that, along with Vitality.

The same holds true for Jackson himself. Dumping 500 points in strength was a bit of an overkill. I feel that someone as experienced at gaming as he is would have spent at least 40 in Persuasion to see how it affected his healing and runes. He now has 700 Strength and only 50 Agility? I realize some of Rachel's and Jackson's choices are probably made by you for story purposes, but it's to the point of hardly being believable. I also feel that after hearing Hale's comment about "deprive you of your primary weapon and you're weak" that Jackson would take that to heart by practicing brawling (no weapons), as well as at least one or two other weapons (such as sword and axe).

You wrote Hale's and the Mage's cloak having a shield spell that effectively made them invincible, yet when Jackson wears a cloak, the spell conveniently runs out of energy. After seeing how Hanta's combat runes got used up so quickly, why didn't Jackson's special attacks on the Mage's shield rapidly deplete the stored essence in the shield? True, the Mage had some gems sewn inside his cloak, but he also just came from a war zone.

Why on earth would a Golem guardian just stand there and allow a rattok to chew its feet off at the ankles? Clearly we saw earlier in the story that simply standing on top of a sleeping Golem is enough to wake it up. What good is a guardian if it allows itself to be destroyed without putting up a fight?

If you're trying to position Charles in such a way that he and Jackson are forced to work together, perhaps due to them both caring deeply about Rachel, be keenly aware that it's going to be a near insurmountable task for Jackson to ever forgive Charles for killing and dissecting his best friend. In my opinion, Charles is yet another bad guy that needs to be killed off eventually. Too much of a megalomaniac. Or perhaps have him sacrifice his life to save Rachel, thereby preserving Jackson's and Rachel's friendship.

Rachel needs to tone down on the constantly insulting everyone. These tirades of hers take away her likability. Rambling and being a nutcase is fine, but the constant insults for no reason can get a bit grating.

I really like your ability to give your characters different personalities. There are very clear delineations between Jackson, Rachel, Charles, Boonta, and all the main characters personalities. This is a talent you have that many authors don't have. Too often characters just become like NPC's in an RPG that are simply used to spout lines of dialog and have no differentiating characteristics.

I hope we see the continuation of this story this year! I plan on purchasing Contractor and Prisoner as soon as Prisoner is released. Cheers!

Hi Over_Red

Your writing is impeccable and the only reason I didn't give this first arc of dream drive 10/10 is simply because Jackson's response to ISIS seems to lack the sharp thinking that he otherwise shows . According to you Jackson is a gaming prodigy and an opportunist if his vitcoin fortune is anything to go by.

Therefore it seems to me that the first thing Jackson would have done on discovering that he has game abilities in the real world is to unload ISIS and load every game he ever played. Then he would have performed every special ability in each of those games with his experienced avatars to transfer those abilities to his ISIS gameplay since his ISIS menu is always on. Maybe some are ISIS compatible but some are not, I leave it to you to decide which to incorporate and what not if you rewrite.

Once he completes his multiple games to ISIS upgrade, Jackson would have returned to ISIS where he'd annhilate the rattok nest and get a lot of essence. Knowing ISIS is real Jackson would invest some points in everything to test all attributes. I'd say he'd ensure vitality and spirit are about the same at 150. Strength like 200 and 50 fir everything else.

at the end, where he abuses game mechanics. Knowing that ISIS is real and the tribes are facing an army with him and the spirit guides too far away to help, Jackson would have strategically gotten the optimal use out of the long range energy cannon before he broke it. He would have used his essence crystals to replenish his mana. Then he'd make the first shot with the cannon. Maybe with spirit guides help he fires another mana fueled salvo before using health for the two last shots and breaking the cannon. So total 3 or 4 cannon shots Result? He gets 6000+ essence

Within essence to spare, he'd dump 500 each into strength vitality and agility, 250 everything else except for spirit which he hits the sweet spot with 300. Jackson slaughters the army and unlocks the new abilities. Then adds another 250 to strength and vitality after his soul recovers thanks to spirit surge.

Finally at the end, after he frees Shaka, the tactically sound move would have been to regroup with rachel and chaki before eviscerating the troops fast. With rachel, chaki and shaka supporting, he'd slaughter them in the narrrow cave entrance. This is more likely especually knowing what hale did to rachel, seeing the magic of the cubes, nearly getting killed by the mage who trapped him in a cage and knowing that it took several spirit guides to unlock the portal to Dis.

After that they either arrive to stop hale together or find him killed by the gargoyle and the golem saves them or they kill it.

Apart from the above, Very well done.

I finished this in 2 days, Absolutely loved it. Can't wait for more

I am just finish with Conteactor, and now i want to read prisoner, but i can not find it, can you tell me where to buy it, kindly regards bard@devenia.com

Awesome story. I hope you continue it.

This story reminds me of PantherParrabola's , "The Bonding Chronicles", which is one of my all time favorites on this site. I loved reading this and look forward to your other work. Thank you for this gift of literature!

YO! ARE YOU DONE WITH YOUR SEQUEL TO YOUR NOVEL YET? WE WANT MORE MY DUDE!

Any idea if the story will continue? Is it dead?

Hey bro, I get you have other things going on, but it's been 2 friggin years. Where's that next chapter?

I still love this story of being trapped in a game, and I'm really looking forward to its continuation. I wish it was safe for work so I could recommend it to my friends and family.

Fucking loved it!!

I've been waiting patiently, but every time I finish what you've posted so far I'm overwhelmed with sadness that there isn't any more. I just have to add my walls to the multitudes that cry out for your return.

Seriously though, I know you have Pharm school and other projects but is there ANYTHING that would help expedite your return? I'm already considering purchasing your other publication but I'm genuinely second guessing that purchase if it's meant to be a series. Im thinking you've taken a page out of GRRM's playbook and are just teasing your readers with tantalizing stories every 5 years. :p

No, for real, please consider getting a Patr.eon page to facilitate your turning this into a $ making endeavor. As someone who has already supported a Lit author there, I can tell you MANY of us would gladly help finance a project this well - loved. Especially if it means if comes out sooner.

♡ivy

Mr. Lonesome

That was too short. Only took about three extremely late nights around work to read, it is that good. Well and truly sucked in, and pleased with it :)

On one hand i really love this story and want to support you, but on the other hand i wonder if buying your other stuff might send the wrong message. I want this story to be told. What should i do?

Please come back to write more. Need to find out what happens next.

Fantastic. And a great pausing point. Not that I don't want more but you actually ended this portion properly which I had been dreading once I realized that this story wasn't complete about half way through ch5.

Love what you've done with this idea and how you've merged, religion, Sci fi, and fantasy all together. Great read.

And ffs have Jackson put some damn points in agility!

imma need more of that... fast... preferably now... no stress though...

Second time reading this, still hoping for more to follow.

OK so I relay like Isekai stories, and this was a grate one. Couldn't stop reading it. Thankfully my boss hasn't noticed the work that I haven't been doing... need to catch up on that now before he dose... its going to be a long night.

It was nice seeing the characters developed, some times in ways that conflicted with their initial presentation, but the story was good enough that I didn't have any problem with the minor inconsistencies. Its also impressive that so many elements tied in so well as they did given that I understand the story was not planed out in advance.

It has grown into a bit of a monster though, so much has been set up that even with so very much written it still feels like we are in the prelude... which is probably why I am feeling so incredibly unsatisfied with where we left off. ... I guess that the frustration I am feeling at where we left off could be taken as a complement to the author....

Dude, read a litle about Mary sue character types, and op vilains, you are writting yourself into a correr with Charles, and don't kill the Ai, please. Can't wait for next chapter.

????

This story was really good, but the addition of Charles was plainly unnecessary and, quite frankly, the bits that you did place was heavily underdeveloped. In any case, I hope you do continue this story given that this has a lot of potential, but do focus on adding more essence into the other upgrades

I'm disappointed that Rachel didn't end up bonded with Jackson, I really didn't want to see her with any other guy.

Any chance on an update on dream drive or contractor??

This writer must be dead after this amount of time with nothing released which really sucks because this should have been continued and published as a series