by JimBob44
I hope there is a prt 2 coming? Maybe have them bere his children and what happens to the reverend?
loved this story and hope you have a few more chapters in the works
thank you
I read from this site a lot and my favorite stories are the ones that are actually a story. This is a prime example. I even think you left some room to expand it if you wish. I know I would continue to be a fan of it.
Don't you dare leave us hanging like that! LOL...Good story will be looking forward to part 2
For the most part a very well written story! Good pace and several unusual plot twist! Requesting more of the series!
I hope you keep going with this story, not just "jacking off" material, has substance and intrigue. I love it, Thankyou, I actually gave you a 5....😊
Really enjoyed the read.
I agree with the comments this story really does need a continuation.
VERY pleased to see all who commented on your story actually have names, not nameless, this makes a change.
It entertained me as long as the brain's critical facilities were not engaged ( just as the author intended ) .
I never rate nor comment on stories. Hell, I barely read any stories over two pages. Yours kept me reading though. I hope this is at least a two to three part series.
I hope this is just the start.....I've enjoyed many of your stories, but this one seems to just open the door for much more. Rayne and wendy will open more doors I think as they keep going.
Please kind storyteller, lead us down the path to so much more. Your enjoyment is definitely our pleasure. And our enjoyment also.
Thank you kind sir, your humble readers............GP
Story was good, a little long, but good. The ending left me wanting more and by now it's time for a sequel. The sooner, the better.
Noticed a lot of iffy sentences in the middle of the story, mostly Wendy's speech, where the definite article was randomly left out.
There was no comment about her not speaking fluent English, so it seems like the author was just sloppy.
The shifting POVs seemed a bit weird, the different story elements were just too disjointed, unless there's supposed to be a sequel, both the addition of the roaming killer, and the psycho reverend seemed nonsensical, they never connected back with the main thread, so they felt superfluous.
The author's time would have been better spent to leave those parts out, as well as the unnecessary rape, and focused on Julian and the two girls, fleshing their story out a bit more.
Ib if you honestly missed the connections of the additional story lines then you simply weren't paying attention. I'd suggest rereading it but it likely wouldn't change your opinion anyway, so I'll just suggest that you don't sweat the small stuff.
Sign of a great story - I was sad that it ended. That's how happy it made me.
I've read 3? JimBob stories and I'm becoming addicted. Good thing I'm retired with lots of time to read. Those little (unrelated?) side trails within the story - yeah, they're interesting too.
Paul in Oklahoma
The story felt real. As if these people and their problems actually exist. I'm surprised it came to an end.
10 out of 10
If you write for people's enjoyment. You shouldn't have killed the baby 😥😢 that was heartbreaking
The constant back and forth between the various scenes kept the story fresh and alive. Reminded me of Tom Clancy's style. Did get a little lost in the reverend's stream, though. Not quite sure it added a lot.
Excellent mastery of dialogue and dialects. Steamy sex.
Thank you!
-a
Like alextasy said, the Reverend bits feel tacked onto the overall story. Also, I find that JB often tells stories of random strangers who fall in love based solely on their sexual attraction. That's not terribly realistic. I've seen so many couples who have a sexual based relationship and really don't like or respect or admire one another.
That said, I do like JB stories where people take charge of their futures and find a little happiness despite tough circumstances.
I usually read about half of the first page before I decide to read the rest but you had me at her hair reaching her calves. Of course her being a complete bombshell helps. I hope to see great things in this story
Would have liked a little more clarity on the retribution to the rapists and later the reverend. Great plot and good dialogue. Maybe a follow on?
good story, except the random murders and the whole preacher thing had no relationship with the story ...make them a clear part of the plot and the story will rate higher
I really enjoyed this story - Would have liked to know the ending of it. I found the reverend sub-plot as a story unto itself and not adding anything to the main story arc. Not a bad thing, just pointing it out... 5*
A great story.
Love your characters. Just reading your Loving Wives and incest stories first, then others later.
You are an excellent author to explore, lots of enjoyment reading your works to come.
5/5
I enjoyed this story but with no follow up it remains to confusing. The were to my side characters and they took away from the story, I really wanted to read about Derek's brother dealing out punishment on his brothers killers. A second part would be a very welcome gift.
An enjoyable, well written story, but I can't help feeling that there should be more; the ending seems forced, rather than a developed part of the story, almost as if the author has decided he'd written enough and brought it to an abrupt closure
The inclusion of Wendy in the brother-sister fuck fest just spoiled the story!!
Those men gang-raping Wendy didn't seem to worry Wendy when she was flipping through the porn selection
WENDY IS A PUSHY BITCH....THE STORY WOULD BE BETTER WITHOUT HER TAGGING ALONG WITH THEM
After a second reading, I appreciate the characters a bit more. Reevaluated as 4 , rather than 3 stars... 4 Stars for sure.
Too many unconnected stories going on more or less in parallel.
Impossible to guess why you wrote this.
Great story, but a Baptist minister would never do what he did, a Catholic priest would. That absolutely destroyed your story for me. I kept reading though. Other then the Minister part, it was a great story. You should never put anything negative about Christianity in a story like this. Just leave it out altogether is the best thing to do.