All Comments on 'Fibonacci's Window'

I guess it really doesn't mean a lot, does it?

This is the type of story you can read any way you want: beginning to end; end to beginning; front to back; back to front; and sideways to sideways. However, it can be very disconcerting.

Boyd

That was the biggest load of shit I have ever read, why the hell would you waste your time even typing that crap. Congratulations you are the biggest LOSER!

This is a very sweet story, chock full of empathy and insight. This is the first story I read where I actually cared about the protagonists. Nice head job too.

I hope you get over your laziness and get back to the terminal to write more.

This is either brilliant or crap but I can't tell. All I know is that it doesn't make a tiny bit of sense to me.

I enjoyed reading this - original, entertaining, short enough to hold my attention, but not erotic (to me anyway). I'm glad I bothered to read it, but then didn't know quite how to rate it, hence the middling mark (fuck, two and a half out of five, 50%, not good, not bad, 50 wasted cents out of 100, 18 letter e's in this sentence).Would have been twenty one if I'd written eighteen instead of 18, but then the statement would have been wrong. Is there a number that works in the sentence?

Good effort BlackShanglan, thanks.

A fine look into the mind of an obsessive.

And how a thing as simple as love overcomes that obsession.

I especially liked the progression. At the beginning, numbers, nothing but numbers. At the end, the numbers are gone.

A very original piece of work.

Well done, Shang!

Obsession, counting, what's not to like?

REALLY stupid

I am assuming the male character has autisim. I am sorry to say I've never thought about how difficult it would be to have any relationship when you don't fall with in society's norm. I liked getting a peek into this world. Thank you.

Can I rank this 61803?

I don't know how others will receive this, but I found it an amazing read! You're to be congratulated on an unique approach. The story style fits the protgonist very nicely. I, for one, look forward to more of your writing ...

this is the most confusin story i had eva read!!!!

Very unusual, it's always interesting to see life from inside someone different to most of us, and your writing does that.

Huh, who woulda thunk? Well, I loved it, at least. But I'm glad you didn't make this a multi page epic, or I would have gone nuts. :)

You're too intelligent for your own good Shang...that's why you've got people pissing on your story.

You need, at least, half a brain to understand the depth of the humour you've demonstrated in this story.

That's only the second one of yours I read but if they're all as good as this one you've just got yourself a new fan in me my friend.

They're flaming THIS?

WTEFH??

Okay... well, obviously they don't have the brains the gods gave my cat... then again, neither do I - but I still loved it!

To understand this story the reader must pay adequate attention and possess the ability to place themselves inside the mind of the main character.

It's a very sweet and surrealistic love story.

Well done.

Absolutley amazing. I love it. Transporting, touching, and moving.

Harry Leg

I think you said it best; "It's fucking amazing."

You're incredibly talented; if I didn't adore you and your work quite so well, I would be positively green with envy. Excellent work.

But rounded up to where it should be...

I loved the ending, don't think I could do decimal ciphers after orgasming either.

You've obviously been watching Monk. A great job of getting into the mind of an obsessive compulsive with a nice twist at the end. I can see where folks who don't pick up on the narrator's OCD may wonder about the writer's sanity, but we know about that already, don't we?

Rumple

and I still love it.

Kinda Jack Kerouac meets OCD- interesting to see how it jumps right in, right into the middle of the character's day/impulsive train of thought. Good use of erotica too, not overdone like so many. Find it iteresting enough to read more...

I loved this when I read it in the challenge, and I love it still. It can be challenging to enter the head of a person who isn't "Normal", but then, are so many of us confident of our normalcy? You handled this narrator with cleverness and compassion. Yes, it's a rather difficult, even experimental story, but certainly not so much as to make it unclear or unreadable. I really think you should look to publish this somewhere beyong Lit where it will garner the attention and reward it deserves.

And no, this is not a paid endorsement.

I'm having trouble with words at the moment, I'll confine myself to shielding my eyes from the brilliance of yours.

It's beautiful, courageous (the writer and the writing, and, I guess, the characters). Didn't read it on the forum, wasn't up to speed either to enjoy or participate. I'm glad I waited.

into an obsessive mind. Brilliantly written. As Liar said, I'm so glad it wasn't any longer or I'd have gone nuts trying to read it. If you weren't such a lovable horsey, I could easily hate you for your talent. Mat xx

This story leaves me breathless and floating, just like your main character. Everything else flies out of my head. I am awed by how wonderfully well you capture the moment, and how sweet that moment is. Beautiful piece of work.

What's it say that I completely got this? Heh. I thought you did a fantastic job. This is an amazing piece well worth the "E" accolade that it has received. You showed the compulsions flawlessly, but didn't overshadow that personality of such a person. It is an amazing thing to be locked in ones own head and not be able to find a means to express oneself. Often times the only way to know how such a person feels is to be directly in their head, which you put us in. Thank you for such a much needed and interesting journey into a world that most people dare not venture, and ignore or shun out of fear from lack of understanding.

just now. What a touching, insightful, evocative piece.

I love you, Shang, and if you ever figure out your gender I want to either have your babies or give you babies.

*double bucket of dark chocolate Maltesers*

I loved this Shang. This is the first of yours I've read, and it's really funny because the whole reason I read it was because of a comment you made that it's not doing well in the votes. I loved it! There's times that I have so many things running threw my mind it's so nice to find that one person that makes you loose track for even an instant. Beautiful.

as so many other people have said- to get inside of a slightly different mind...

and I have nothing to say about the writing itself, either, simply, utterly satisfying!

I'm of two minds, to be honest. As a story, it's difficult to follow. The writing, however, is phenomenal. You captured the essence of the character, which is why it's hard to follow as a story, lol.

It would be hell on earth to be inside Jonas' mind, but since, I assume, that's the way he's always been, it would be "normal" for him.

Wonderful show of skill, Shanglan. ~Minx

What a great read this turned out to be! So far, I've read it three times and remain as captivated as the first. I am going to spend some more time with you reading your past offerrings. I, for one, would like to spend more time inside the protagonist's mind.

Congratulations on such a unique piece, Shang. Very interesting work. This was the first story of yours that I've read, and it definitely won't be the last.

...don't have any seizure disorders. If they did, then there would be brain activity from time to time and I think we all know they'd flatline an electroencephalogram.

If you want me opinion, and clearly you do because you’re allowing PCs, I think this story is totally righteous, Shangy baby! Unlike Liar, who enjoyed the story but was glad there wasn’t more of it, I would really have enjoyed a couple more pages of that. I so enjoyed the skill with which you pulled that off, darlin’! I doubt that I could have done it and I don’t doubt in the least that it was challenging. My hat’s off to you, Stud, and anything other article of clothing you care to meantion! Pssst…brains turn me on…*wink*…and you got a HUGE one, baby. *kiss*

Appropriate to the disorder.

Reminds me of my story "Thanks a Lot" except my guy is just plain crazy instead of having a particular problem.

Good effort! (Although I would have liked to see it a bit longer!)

Regards, DJ

I wonder if this is how a mathematician thinks, helplessly obsessed. Interesting piece.

I'm surprised you didn't use the Fibonacci series in your story.

This was a brilliant pice of work, Shang. In the mind of a savant. I was hooked at the first line and it just got better and better. Nice work.

You are a true master!

The more stories of yours that I read the more I am absolutly amazed. They are all so different, from such different points of view. Wow, I can't wait to see the rest!

This is amazing. I read it because of the mention on a thread in the AH. Actually, I didn't mean to read it. I just wanted to see what it was, but you sucked me in right away. As always, your writing delighted me and took me to a different place. Thank you.

brilliant. Incredible look into the mind of someone with a serious ocd problem. I was enthralled from the first word.

What a piece of mud! Your pseudo psychology is quirksome. Please continue with this series, I like it for all the right reasons.

at writing utter shite.

When a reader can't make sense of a story, the writer has a problem...

and came back to read it again.

And it's as kind, lovely, hopeful as I remembered.

"The stairs all have eleven but the last has twelve" is just gorgeous-- as his his realisation-- as much as he's able to understand this-- that he's causing her a lot of trouble with his OCD behaviour. And that she's willing to struggle, for him.

The subtlety of this is erotic in itself. You completely seduced me into his eccentric world and made me care about him and her, even though he's not overtly sympathetic. It was unique and wonderful. Magnificent horse.

Maybe you already knew that; maybe you didn't. Two, three, five, eight.

I'm not sure what the right title would have been. Thirteen, twenty-one.

But it's not 'Fibonacci's Window.' Thirty-four, fifty-five.

That much is clear. Eighty-nine, one hundred forty-four.

Perfect square's a good place to end.

You managed to make him sympathetic despite his obvious problems.

Shame some people have missed the point, but says more about them I guess.

Intriguing and sexy and just a little weird.

God.

I am not blaspheming.

What are you doing here, besides wrecking the curve for the rest of us?

Please tell me you're in print with international distribution.

God.

I'm sorry my previous comment is so inarticulate, and I can't figure out how to take it down.

I'm still uncharacteristically lacking for words, but all I meant was that--nothing against Lit, obviously--but your work is on a-whole-nother level, and deserves a wider audience.

I confess that the Bad Jealous Me is stamping her little foot and whinging, "How am I supposed to post anything ever again with the bar set this high?"

Good Perceptive Me is profoundly grateful to have found your work.

Thank you.

One of the finest pieces of writing on Lit. Thank you so much.

Indeed, it's one of the finest pieces of writing on LIT, just like Scotsman69 said.

Just about every word feels right and in its right place, not one sentence incomplete, not one sentence too much or missing. "Fibonacci's Window" seems darn close to what the word 'perfection' denominates.

From my point of view, however, there might be one frailty to this perfection: the somewhat subdued erotic intensity. But to demand erotic fireworks out of such a small package of first-rate short fiction would perhaps be simply too much, a 'too much' inadequate of minimalistic form.

And thus I, too, thank you so much!

Too bad, you're not publishing on LIT anymore.

Regards and best wishes

–AJ

with Mr. James' comments on your superb effort. It is indeed one of the best in all of Literotica. I am somewhat reminded of Dustin Hoffman's character in Rainman.

Great work!

Oh, this is good. I HAVE OCD. Trust me, it IS like this. Anyone who wants to explore it a bit more check out the rest of the genre. And next time please tell people what the Fibonacci Series is? I'm trying to be good and not tell her, but it's killing me.

A stirring peek inside a mind that doesn't see the world in an every-day sort of way.

Just "Wow!" I don't know what else to say. Except "Thanks."

Yes, that's it: "Wow, thanks!"

;^)