Fool's Errand

Meanwhile, Lyndsey had a similar restless night. Caroline had mentioned that Mason had been jilted at the church, but that was getting on for a dozen or more years ago. Now it seems that he had been unlucky in love again, much more recently, this time with a baby daughter involved. Why was this a secret, to be kept from his family and friends, yet be prepared to publicise this sham "engagement" just to play a trick on his mother? He seemed so open and honest and gentlemanly in the small things, like offering her his coat for comfort, yet in the bigger picture of relationships he was clammed tightly shut. This arrangement that Gareth was so keen on, to look good in Daddy's eyes, was looking decidedly messy.

Chapter 2

"Alan, it's arrived, the delivery van has just dropped it off!"

"What's arrived Sofe?" Alan looked up from his toast and tangerine marmalade to ask his long-time partner Mrs Sofia Lyndsey as she burst into the kitchen carrying a small parcel. She may have been nearly sixty, while he was ten years younger, but she was always so full of life and fun that she was more like a girl than a woman fast approaching retirement age. "What've you got there?"

"Bald wigs, from that theatrical suppliers I found online," she laughed tore at the wrappings and out emerged two flesh-coloured latex hats. She pulled one on, and her thick black hair disappeared under the strongly elastic hat.

"Actually, Sofe, that looks really good. Go check it out in the cloakroom."

She ran off down the hallway and a moment later he could hear her scream with laughter. She walked back in a little slower, beaming all over her face. "Go on Alan, try yours on."

He did. "It's really tight," he complained.

The phone rang, but the caller ID said 'Anna'.

"It's just Sis, I'll call her back later."

Sofia took a photo of Alan on her mobile and showed him. "All we need is a little foundation cream around the edges to disguise the join and we are set."

Sofia took a selfie of the pair of them and even without the cream, it looked quite convincing.

"So, at the last minute on say 30 or 31 March, after teeing them up for weeks about supporting little Eddie in his fight against cancer, we send this to Caroline and Mason and see if they fall for it!"

"Sofia, you are such a devil, but this could turn out to be your best April Fool ever!"

***

Mason collected Lyndsey, who was patiently standing under an umbrella at the hospital entrance. She was wearing a warm quilted jacket, grey skinny jeans, emphasising her slim and athletic appearance, and comfortably old well-worn trainers. She welcomed him with a warm smile. As he dropped her bag into the boot of the car, Lyndsey noticed the boot was full of baby stuff, a Moses carry-cot, a folded push-chair and a box of toys, as well as his overnight bag. She also noticed the baby seat fitted in the back, behind the passenger seat. Together they drove out to the bypass café, just a couple of miles away.

The inside of the car was warm, so she pulled down her coat zip and pulled off her scarf and laid it on her lap. Mason noticed it.

"The team's colours are green and white, so where'd you get the scarf?"

"Ah," she grinned, "one of my patients, Luke, is a fan and has six green and white balloons tied to the bottom of his bed. I mentioned I was going to the cup match and he loaned me his scarf."

"Luke Cooper is your patient?"

"Yes. He should have gone home this morning, but he reacted slightly detrimentally to the anaesthetic, so he'll have a 50/50 chance of being released today but even if he is, he won't be fit to go to the match. He said his Dad won't be going either, so was glad his scarf would be attending the game as his proxy. I'll give it back to him on Monday."

Lyndsey looked around the car's interior. It was clean, neat and tidy. She resisted the urge to open the glove compartment to check it out. She had a little smart car that Gareth always laughed at, but it was convenient and easy to park, and she always kept it clinically tidy. Gareth had two relatively new cars, a soft-top Porsche Boxter and a big 4x4, and both were filled with junk: old letters, newspapers, old cups, used parking tickets, just clutter that was rarely tidied and never hoovered out. On the other hand, Mason drove an old, nondescript family saloon, but it was shiny on the outside and clean on the inside. It even smelled nice, of pine cones and polish.

"I like how clean and tidy your car is," she remarked, looking for his reaction and noticing him smile. "Is it always like this or are you pulling out all the stops this weekend?" She noticed his smile grow, and she continued by explanation, "Gareth's cars are tips that I dread to enter sometimes."

He laughed. "I clean the interior of the car every other Saturday, well Friday this week, so that it is squeaky clean for collecting Maisie. And, as she can be smelly, what with nappies and the odd throw-up and dribbling, I clean the car every other Monday afternoon. But even if there was no baby using the car, I still like things clean and orderly."

"Me too. Gareth's a complete slob, I'm afraid."

"You'll have to get him trained before the wedding."

"I'm not sure if he's trainable, he's lived on his own for too long."

"How long is 'too long'?"

"Oh, about five or six years, I think. He's two years younger than me."

"Cradle snatcher, huh?" Mason laughed.

"And what about you? Is Maisie's mother about your age?"

"No, she's 32, six years younger than me."

"I don't want to pry, but I was wondering why you appear to have kept her secret from your family?"

"Ah, well, to start with it was a marriage of convenience ... she was going to be deported and needed to marry someone in order to stay."

"She was an illegal immigrant?"

"No, not to start with, she was here as a student, studying nursing. Her parents are also nurses from Indonesia and now living over here quite legally. She came over before them on a student visa, but never completed her studies. She lived with a boyfriend for a number of years and while they were trying to have a family she had a couple of early miscarriages and, tragically, a full-term stillbirth. Her boyfriend wanted children and the stillbirth was the final straw, thinking she wasn't going to deliver, he simply abandoned her. She hadn't renew her visa and the authorities threatened her with deportation, even though her parents now live here. It was a mess, she was a mess."

"I can imagine. So how did you ..."

"A dating site," he quickly answered her started question. "It's not that I was desperate, but when I was laid off from the Army, I was rudderless and lost ... and rather lonely, I guess. She sounded nice from her profile, although there was no mention of immigration difficulties at the outset, so I arranged to meet up with her for the first of several dates. We got on well and soon we fell in love, or so I thought."

"So she was playing you so that she could stay in the country?"

"Possibly. They do say love is blind, don't they?" Mason paused. "I think she is presently suffering from post partum depression. Because before she had the baby she appeared to be affectionate and loving and I thought everything was going great. When she fell for the baby, after she had told me that she thought she was infertile, she was nervous about the whole thing, expecting another failure. But then she was over the moon once we had passed the first few worrying weeks and she started to show."

"So why did you not tell your parents about the marriage and pregnancy then? Are they prejudiced about her being oriental?"

"No, not at all. I kept quiet about the dates, because, well, computer dating made me feel ashamed, desperate, and I heard that a lot of people do it for reasons of promiscuity, involved in extramarital affairs, and, well you know."

"And you had been this self-contained tough soldier boy that didn't need help to pick up a girl, huh?"

"Yeah, something like that, but then Leone, that's her name, was also ashamed by having to use a dating site. She blamed it on her culture and when I proposed, she stipulated that she didn't want us to meet our families until we had been married for a year and she was certain that it was going to last. She cited her old boyfriend who abandoned her. She had already told me about her failed relationship, the miscarriages and her fears of rejection, so I went along with them. Then, almost immediately after the registry office wedding, she discovered the pregnancy and that added another level of insecurity and worry for her."

"Did you respond positively or negatively to the news of the pregnancy?" Lyndsey bit her lip, wondering if she had gone a question too far.

"I was over the moon, to be honest. Having children before I was 40 was an important milestone for me, knowing I would be 63 by the time the eldest would be 25 and ready to start his or her own family. Of course I understood Leone's fears, her explanation that she wanted to go to full term with the baby before we said anything to our families. Then Maisie was born early, underweight, and with breathing and feeding difficulties. She was in ICU for ten days and Leone was living the stillbirth all over again."

"So you continued to keep it quiet from family?"

Mason nodded. "Leone slept at the hospital all through Maisie being in ICU, and was only home with the baby for one day, not even staying for one night. I could see she wasn't happy but I didn't know what to do. I looked after the baby when she said she needed some fresh air and was gone most of the morning. Here we are," he added as the car pulled into the car park of the Café, and manoeuvred through to a space at the back of the parking area, out of the way of other cars and trucks and switched off the engine.

He turned to face Lyndsey, one arm resting on the steering wheel. "Leone came back to feed Maisie without a word to me about where she had been. She didn't want to talk to me, ignoring my greetings and I didn't want to add to the pressure she was under, of create a scene. I left her feeding the baby while I popped out for groceries for the evening meal that I was going to cook. When I got back they were both was gone. I waited a day or two then I looked for her for days in places we would visit during the months leading up to the birth. Eventually, through some ex-Army pals, I found her at her parents' house about 70-odd miles away. I had still never met her parents and I assume that her turning up with the new baby in tow was a shock to them. Then. Of course, I showed up out of the blue, which was a shock; she had kept her parents a secret from me and me a secret from them. She refused to speak to me that day and has done so ever since, almost 11 months ago, and now my life is basically on hold."

Mason's eyes looked sad, as if he could cry any moment. Lyndsey cradled his head in her hands and, reaching up, kissed him lightly on his cheek. He didn't attempt to hug her, his hands hanging helplessly by his side.

"Let's go meet your friends and have a day thinking about other things, like your football, and we can deal with emotional things tomorrow, together, OK?"

"OK."

"I'm really looking forward to meeting Maisie, you know."

"And I'm looking forward to showing her off to you," he grinned, "I know you'll just fall in love with her at first sight, everyone does."

Lyndsey was glad that he appeared to be feeling much more upbeat. "How will your wife Leone take you showing up with a new and slightly younger girlfriend?"

"It may just shake her out of her apathy."

"You want to get back together with Leone again?"

"I don't know, it's complicated by other factors that I don't want to go into, but I don't think that's at all possible any more. Besides, the divorce will be official next week anyway."

They got out of the car and fetched their coats and hats from the boot. Lyndsey carried a small shoulder bag big enough for her purse, a phone and her gloves, Mason put his wallet in a side pocket of his camera bag. As they started to walk towards the café, walking side by side, they each naturally sought out and held each other's hands.

"I think we should hug and lip kiss every time we meet, Mason. That way it will become natural and should impress both your parents and my Daddy."

"Well, no complaints from me on that score, Lyndsey," he grinned.

"Ha! So, did your Mum grill you after speaking to your Aunt Anna last night?"

"No, funnily enough, not. But a text from Caroline said that her phone hadn't stopped ringing and she had several conversations with Mum, where she grudgingly failed to give her much information other than it was through us being a couple that had introduced her to Gareth on a blind date and that they were now going to a rugby match as a first date." Mason looked at her. "You are all right with this arrangement aren't you?"

"Of course, Gareth can take care of himself," Lyndsey said, giving Mason a sideways glance, "So, you and I, today, I am what, to your friends, a fiancée or just new girlfriend?"

"The truth. A new friend. Imagine that we've just met on a blind date and are out today to learn more about each other and what we can do when we are together," Mason replied with a smile. "I don't want to lie to my friends, but this whole April Fool thing between my sister and mother is ... well, it's just between us and my friends don't need to know the whole story. I'm glad you're not wearing your fiancée's ring today, that would certainly get the tongues wagging, might even put the team off their game!"

"So," she continued, "do you often bring new girlfriends to football matches?"

"No, you're the first, Leone could not be dragged anywhere near a football match," he grinned, "but I rang ahead to my friend Nora and she'll save you a seat at the breakfast table and you're booked on the coach, so prepare yourself for a grilling from Nora and friends."

"And as for my ring—"

"We're here."

He pulled open the café door and ushered her in ahead of him, then steered her towards the far corner of the room.

To Lyndsey's mind, half the dining room was segregated off from the rest of the café and the full section they approached was full of testosterone, a sea of male eyes almost as one turned to look at her as she came in. She was used to this and was unfazed by it. It was like every day in her life since she hit puberty. She let go of Mason's hand for a moment and waved at the room with a brilliant smile, then tucked her arm back into Mason's arm as a possessive gesture.

"Hi, everyone, I'm Lyndsey, a friend of Mason's. Good luck at the match today."

Then she looked at Mason, who smiled back at her while he guided her towards their table. There were two spare chairs at this table. Here sat an upright gentleman who was well into retirement age bearing a grey moustache and a full head of brilliant white hair. Next to him on his right sat a hugely overweight ginger-haired young man with a very red face who was either a teenager or in his early twenties at most. On the left of the white-haired man was a slightly-built woman, also just as old but her hair was dyed to the colour of yellow straw rather than iron grey. The last member was a tall, slim clean-shaven man in his late 50s in a suit and tie. The other three wore varying sizes and styles of the club's green-striped jersey, although the last one wore a suit with a green-striped club tie, their winter coats and thick green-and-white scarves slung over the backs of the chairs.

"Morning all. This is my friend Lyndsey. Meet Greg," Mason said, quietly adding so the lad couldn't hear him, while he introduced her to the ginger-haired boy, "he's autistic but gathers numbers and statistics for me, having a photographic memory."

"You're beautiful!" Greg gasps, his mouth wide open, exposing his protruding yellow teeth with undisguised excitement. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen!"

"Well, thank you, kind sir," Lyndsey smiled her brilliant smile, "I like you already, Greg."

"He can't help saying the first thing that comes into his head," Mason whispered, "he recognises your beauty and simply cannot control his willingness to share his appreciation of you. You've nothing to fear, though, he's big and strong but he really wouldn't harm a fly."

"I'm Nora," the straw-haired woman who was in her late 70s said, rising from her seat and holding out her hand for Lyndsey to shake.

"Nora", Mason continued, "is a supporter because her son once played for the team in his youth and her late husband was also a long-time supporter and former team photographer, so she carries on supporting us. Bob," the old boy, in his early 70s, with the shock of white hair, "is a married retired plumber who used to be a past chairman of the club. And finally, this dapper chap here is George, who is the current chairman."

"It's a pleasure to meet you all," Lyndsey smiled, "and thank you so much for inviting me to your table. I am really looking forward to the game."

"We always save a seat at the breakfast table for Mason." Nora said, "we've ordered your breakfast, Mason rang me this morning and told us you were coming."

Greg says she's beautiful several times, which pleases and embarrasses her. Of course they are all curious about her, but Mason tells them that they only met last night and are still getting to know one another, so begs them to please leave the poor girl alone. The heaped breakfast plates arrive for the two late arrivals, full of sausages, eggs, bacon, mushrooms, hash browns and toast.

"I don't eat this fried stuff," Lyndsey leaned over whispered to Mason, "I can feel my arteries hardening just looking at it!"

"That's a good thing that you don't eat fried stuff, because none of this is fried, all of this is grilled or toasted," Mason grinned, "The bacon and handmade sausages come from Bennett's the Butchers, the free-range eggs are poached rather than fried and come from Manor Farm, which is completely organic. Our breakfasts are grilled separately from the other customers' food. The reason is that most of the food is supplied free or heavily subsidised, as all the suppliers are club sponsors, and we make up the small difference by all chipping in a monthly subscription by direct debit which pays for the breakfast, or at least the difference. Our subscription also pays for the coach trips. The team all breakfast together on a Saturday, even when playing at home, we have found it a great way to promote team bonding."

Lyndsey had heard about the famous Bennett's sausages, so she tried a slice of one first. "Wow, it's delicious!" And the bacon, she pronounced a few moments later, was the best she'd ever eaten. She proceeded to finish the breakfast.

After breakfast they piled onto the bus and Lyndsey was guided into a window seat near the front of the bus, while Mason sat next to her in the aisle seat. Most of the team gravitated to the back of the bus. The journey took about an hour and on the way they simply exchanged small talk about what he was going to do as part of his reporting and photography of the game.

At the away ground, they had to sit around in the rather shabby utilitarian clubhouse for half an hour before match started, as the team had to change into their kit and warm up before taking to the field. Then Mason took posed team photos of both clubs and the officials on the field before the game started. Mason had to troll around the pitch taking photos and writing down brief descriptions of the principle actions of the match. Lyndsey followed him around for part of the time, but soon got bored with that and settled down to chat with Nora and Greg in a small and rather dilapidated stand by the side of the pitch.

Just before half-time, Mason warned her that they had to show their faces in the board room.