All Comments on 'Forbidden'

There were a few typos that got through, but over all, a very good read! I only wonder if it should have been put in the "Romantic" section as it is mostly a love story, and had very little sex!

Hey ignore that previous comment, seems like definitely the right section to me :) great story!

Many great things about the story - one that particularly liked is that Reyna could be a part of the (decidedly non-traditional) family without being a lesbian too. It was kind of a nice twist.

And the ending was great. It tied things together but gave a feeling that life goes on and that interesting times were ahead for them all.

Thanks for such a good read.

Simply breath taking! I laughed; I cried, I could easily relate to the characters. I absolutely loved it from the first paragraph to the last!

Superb story!

Please, only take this is a huge compliment, but I'm wondering if you are really Lisa Summers, writing under another name...?

I want to thank everyone for their comments, comparrisons and critiques. Just to let you know, I am who and what I say I am on my profile. I am a male published writer of a completly different genre. I started writing these stories as a way to grow in my writing and on a request from a friend.

I've had many requests of personal stories and commisioned pieces of work. I'm sorry, but at this time I am buried in the next novel lenght project for standard publishing. In a way, these stories have given me the background to complete this novel. There are a few more stories that I am planning to post on this site, that are in the editing process. As soon as the editors get them back to me, I will post them for your enjoyment.

thanks again

The Author

I absolutely love your stories, i would love to read another story about Jane a susan and all the family lol, you always leave me wanting more at the end of your stories and one day i hope to find the second chapter like you did with amber, just love your work

What a lovely story.

this is very original and heartwarming! keep up the good work. and remember that boundaries are only put up by man, the heart knows no limits.

What a ride, it had it all. Tears, laughter, love and a wonderful ending, left me feeling good about life.

No, seriously, I absolutely loved this!!! I'd love to read about the next couple years of their lives. You've got such enticing characters :)

Absolutely wonderful, enjoyable story. Thank you! ~ L

We want more ! Please continue

another good story, thanks!

I'm a happy ending kinda guy, so I'm happy you ended this on a high note.

Not that I would mind one, but I don't think a continuation is needed. You ended in a good place, and as you said, we can take it where we want.

Well done!

Jewish people speak either Yiddish (informal Eastern European Polyglot like pidgin English Hawaiians speak) or Hebrew (official Jewish language). There is no such language as Jewish.

Otherwise, great story

I'm not too sure why this is in the lesbian erotica, there's no sex whatsoever.

Very disjointed, sentences describing scenes really should be paragraphs. The flow is very fast and incomplete.

Bad news first. Throughout, the story was marred for me by some terrible spelling errors and/or misuse of words. The first was in your introduction: the word is "Copyright", not "Copywrite". The silliest was on the final page: the word for weight or fineness of precious stones and metals is "carat" not "carrot" (a vegetable). An example of misuse of words: you write that the security men are "replete" in their uniforms: I think you meant "resplendent" (look the two words up in a dictionary). Your editors must be either very poor or very careless not to have picked up on all the errors.

The good news is that the story itself is excellent. All of the main characters and their relatives were just the kind of people that would be great to know in real life. I loved the final concept of a vast and extended multicultural family. I've given the story four stars; it would have been five had it not been for the non-stop bloopers.

Loved how you pulled it all together.

Thank you for sharing g this wonderful love story with us!

Emotional, hilarious, unusual, thought provoking ........but above all outstanding.

Possibly there will be mutterings or thoughts about the lack of erotic content, but I personally found it to be engrossing from start to finish.

Thanks for a great tale.

This was SO good. Extremely well constructed, fluid, funny, heavily laced with witty prose. Had to finish it, once I started. Am eager to head over to see what else you've written!

Really liked this. The story was great and satire about religious prejudices and practices. I particularly liked the section about guilt! Lutheran mothers spread the guilt thick through the whole family

You write stories I can get lost in, love it.

Loved the two fight scenes. Whole thing was very well written. It kept the reader interested the whole way thru. I just wish it was longer. Loved all the characters. Well, the females and Susan's family.

5/5

J

I cried, I laught, I want to fight alongside Jane and like Susan I hope all will be good at the even if at some times theirs futures didn't look bright.

Well writen, great likable characters. Bravo

Sylvain

Simply said this was great.

This was simply amazing. I particularly liked how you gave Jane and Susan time to start falling in love before the chaos kicked in--a lot of stories like this feel like they jump straight from the first kiss to "I love you beyond all hope and reason." But it didn't feel like that was the case here at all.

My only complaint is that you didn't go *quite* far enough. All the signs seemed to be pointing towards the ladies to settle down as a polyamorous triad, but Renya wouldn't quite take that last step. (Though it's possible that this is just my own poly self grasping for good poly love stories, because seriously, this could have been a perfect one).

a long story but well worth it. you showed what real LOVE is! a love not only between three people but love from three families well done

Actually glad this didn’t turn into a polyamorous message. However, I wish that Jane had completely resolved her unrequited love for Reyna before she and Susan decided to commit. I hate the idea that Jane was settling because she couldn’t have Reyna. Especially considering that (unless it was a typo) Jane still wanted forever with Reyna.

Third time around ... and it's just as good.

That's just mean leaving at cliffhanger, eh still gonna give ya 5 stars.

I found the story to be quite good, excellent in fact, I gave it a 4, however if it wasn't for all the grammar issues I would have given it a 5. Don't get me wrong, I really loved the story but I'm blind and have to listen to a screen reader and when the story has spelling issues, it tends to be aggravating when listening.

Wow. Just finished the fourth reading, apparently, looking at my last comment!

Even after 4 years, this is still one of my favourite tales.

Being one of 6 kids, and having a mixed heritage partner for the past 30 plus years, whos late father was Moslem, there are many things here that I can actually relate with!!

Lol, maybe thats why I really love this story!

Really good!

This one deserves a sequel, so many options for how it could play out!

A really good read!

Thank you

Still the same problem though. You're just writing about people who want to be selfish. Or who are selfish and self-centered. They're not willing to give in to a complimentary relationship with somebody, the way Nature's defined relationships. They want to have it all their way, whether you call it self-centered or selfish or narcissistic. They're wanting the music to always be melody, instead of the harmony it's supposed to be.