by JukeboxEMCSA
That was the most anti-climactic story I've read in a very long time. I can only assume you are busy working on the next chapter? I mean, I like the way you write, but I feel there is so much that needs to happen here...
Love the Girl(tm) stories and this is certainly a step back in the right direction from some other recent chapters. Really enjoyed it but I must second the opinion that I would have liked a more climactic ending.
I’d been disappointed with your work lately but certainly not this one! Incredibly hot. People may complain it’s anti-climatic, but I think it’s great as is- your writing has always been about the act of submitting to hypnotic bliss more than the actual sex and that’s just perfect.
comment ...... same ....... as......... obedience is pleasureeeeee ! lol. cool storry
your stories lead your readers imagination, and keep us thinking. good four star writing.
I loved the story, and agree with some of the other about it a bit anti-climatic. Hopefully a 2nd chapter will resolve that... Great work though!
[quote] submitting to the hypnotic bliss[/quote]
Exactly. It's abundantly clear on night two that the Girl is targeting Jeremy as well -- the reference to the perfectly framed image and Jeremy clearly seeing those eyes makes it very clear.
So I went back and looked at night one. Once the Girl has Chandra "out", she glows her eyes, which would do nothing for Chandra -- but is the start of the "Lets see what triggers this on-looker" phase. After that, she's just trying things and seeing what has an effect; almost certainly noticing how he responded to the physical/comforting care.
This series is an interesting read, watching the Girls spread out, one more victim after another, even knowing their end-goal after the "factory" episodes.
There's a very different take on the "runaway AI" story, not nearly so "satisfying sex" focused so much as "satisfying values", that comes to more or less the same conclusion. "Friendship is Optimal", about a friendly AI that wants you to have friends...