by Cramnave
I saw part two, or this chapter, come up on a new story request and read both today. A third chapter hangs out there like a slow dropping pitch in the strike zone, but I hope you draw out the seduction just a bit more. A motivation of "I've never done that before so it might be fun," is a short cut to the action and leaves me wanting a bit more info as to why it might be fun. Your characters do not seem so empty headed.
I'm not saying this is how one of your characters approached the action, I am using it as an illustration of no underlying attraction being established.
4 Star
I have read both chapters so far and can't wait to see next chapter or chapters as you expand the characters and storyline.
Hope you keep the story going.
the seduction should take much longer! Building slowly towards the actual physical act heightens and intensifies the anticipation of that first exquisite taste! The taste of lips, of ear lobes, the nape of a neck, an engorged nipple, a heaving belly leading inexorably to the final destination! A pussy is not just a slit and a clit! There are thighs and taints (perineum) to pleasure. The mons pubis & labium majora to caress and savor before ever tasting the labium minor and vagina! Last but certainly not least an engorged clitoris to gently lick and tease until your partner can't help but fuck your face!
Any plans to continue on?
When your mind is re-attuned to where the characters have left off in their growth you should continue on.