All Comments on 'God Laughs Ch. 03'

I don't know who wrote this one, either, but I think it may well have eclipsed the first two chapters, and that's saying a lot! Can't wait for the next chapter. You are writing the most original story I have ever read on this site.

I'll eat em up as fast as you write them. Five stars.

The mad masters unleash another zany tale of the preposterous and delicious. I love it. I have an idea about who wrote this one. I think I have chapters one and three. By process of elimination, I may get chapter two. Now if only we could introduce some acrobats and trained zebras, the menagerie would be complete. Onward!

so many characters, we are still in discovery mode, and it is not that interesting three chapters in. Maybe if the first three chapters were all presented at once, that might make more sense, 3 pages of light, easy setup the drama prose.

We know the party is part of some scheme by hubby and wife to avoid or end a blackmail scheme by Amber's boss, but other than that we are clueless.

Being in sales and making a career of meeting customer expectations, my expectation for this was very high due to the author's involved and it is falling quite short.

First, HDK better get his bulldozer out of the pool before the Board of Health gets there.

The pachyderm, boy, girl, African, Indian, extinct Mammoth, cloned Mastodon?

Somebody better do something about the neighbors before the community association gets involved! Forget the ATF, CIA, NSA, State Police, and FBI, if the Community Association gets wind of this... well I tremble too think.

I thought it was Brad Paisley, (Jimmy Dickens), "Me Neither".

Oh and what poor taste, deriding a small person just when the "mini me" guy died. Have you people no empathy or whatever? "Have you no shame."

And oh yeah, "Stay Gold Pony Boy".

===

Now a real concern, and this gives me the shivers. This is in the wrong category! All the bottom feeders are in the LW section. Someone needs to alert them to what's happening over here. This is a silly and fun story so far, but come on, who's reading it? You've got to go get your audience! Who's going to guess which author did what if no one reads it? Now, "Go get em Red Rider!"

I mean, "Who's going to fill those slots? Who's going to stand that tall?"

when we decided to post in this category. The last posting in Chain Stories, before we started God Laughs, was over a year and a half ago. I have received emails asking me where the hell the story I have been promoting is located since it is not listed on my page. Readers had no reason to peruse chain stories since it was essentially dormant. Now, as the good doctor once exclaimed, "It lives!"

It is interesting that a reader is disappointed in each chapter, but keeps reading each new chapter as it is posted. That tells me that the story is compelling in some way, even if the humor is not always appreciated. For me personally, every chapter has been right in my wheel house. I laughed my ass off. That could indicate to readers that these writers have some serious issues and need understanding and kindness. There are some sick puppies amongst us. (I do wonder where the tiger went!)

One MINOR quibble, and it may be due more to my own lack of insight and discernment, but I'm not really able to see a sign of each writer's unique style.

Maybe later we'll see the Black Ops team or one-legged lesbian that will tell us that the chapter was written by Todd!

...but I have to say the execution over the last two chapters is a little disappointing. Both have been rehashes of the first chapter, with a handful more zany characters introduced. It’s like hearing a really funny story from the guy sitting next to you at a bar. Then, after a few drinks, he tells you the same story, not remembering that he already told you. You smile politely and nod.

We get it. There was a zany party/orgy, with midgets and animals and circus freaks and sex toys and homos and albinos and big-breasted women. Everyone wakes up the following morning and tries to piece together what happened. Then a bunch of feds show up and start questioning the guests. And we learn that all of this had something to do with a blackmail scheme for Amber’s boss.

We learned all of that in Chapter One. We’ve learned nothing more since then. (Except now there’s another unsolved mystery about a box.)

It feels like the writers are a little too tentative. Either they don’t want to take this story too far down the road or they don’t know which direction to take. I’m hoping the next installment advances the story by at least half a day.

"Johnny's dead. Told him about beating the Socs, I don't know. He just died. Told me to stay gold. Dally's gone. He couldn't take it, he's going to blow!"

The story is a real treat. thanks

Swingerjoe and Pattillie keep asking, "Are we there yet?" Some people can drive through the Grand Canyon and and keep asking, "Are we there yet?" I'm enjoying the ride, and these chapters can keep going forever just like this, as far as I'm concerned. Keep it up, authors.

It was the authors of the story. We wrote this for us. We are very happy that others are enjoying the story, and shared it here in case they might, but we are satisfied with our production values, and our process. This story is about having fun, taking what someone else gives you, and seeing what you can make of it. Imagine taking chapter one, as the second writer. What are you going to do? You cannot write "the end," because there are six more authors to come. You can advance plot elements, but you stay within the confines of your task, which is to make moving toward a final resolution both entertaining, and consistent with what came before. Fun! A writer's ultimate challenge.

"We wrote this for us." Now, that is funny and if true it wouldn't be posted on this site.

If this sentence - "This is a chain story written by Jezzaz, Todd172, Stev2244, Harddaysknight, Girlinthemoon, Qhml1, Oshaw and blackrandl1958." - was not the lead in for each chapter, what would be the comments and scoring on this "story?"

Wake me when the robotic velociraptors cuckold the ASPCA agents.

Yes, really, believe it, or not. I could show the emails and chatter describing the formation of the idea as a way of building the writing community, but then you already know that, don't you? I could show you how we decided to do it as a writing exercise, just to see what we could do and the challenges it would bring to us, as writers, but we already said that. We posted it here, in this out of the way little nook of Literotica as something we enjoyed and thought others might enjoy. Apparently, apart from a few of the disgruntled, people are enjoying it. You already knew that, though, right?

Do you imagine, at this stage in the writing lives of these authors, having tens of millions of views among us, award winning stories in categories scattered around Lit., and as many stories as we've written, having sold more books than you have lived days, that we write for any other reason than the enjoyment of it? We do hope people are entertained by our writing, but we write because we love writing. Recognition? Scores? Awards? Red Hs? Blue Ws? We have those. This is just love of the craft, my friend. I won't address this again.

Ok , little lighter on the Hunter S. Thompson in this chpt , but ends heavily on the Hangover ! Lol . ( I keep expecting Zach Galifianakis to appear)

Plus I learned what a Quirt is ! That may or may not come in handy one day !

This is proceeding like a Tilt-A-Whirl , it throws you back in your seat and the centrifugal force keeps you there !

Please , more more more !

5*'s

P.S. at the top of every page , as soon as I read the User Name , Wagner's ' Ride of the Valkyries ' gets stuck in my head ! Subliminally !!!

It turned out to be so much fun we decided to share it. Someone already said it, but in case you missed it, we didn't sit together and plot it out, do character development, or create an outline. One of us would write a segment and pass it on. It's like improv comedy, you're not sure what you're going to get, so you try to make the most of it when it hits you.

So yeah, it's going to be choppy and repetitive at times. The segment I wrote took all of 42 minutes. I know, because I timed myself. And that's after reading the preceding chapters once.

I still think it's a decent product, and have to wonder why the guys that dislike it so much keep reading. It only takes me a page to decide whether to continue or leave a story. I'm too old to waste my time on things that don't please me.

We appreciate our readers, we really do. We would be nothing without you. Still, like I said, this was just an exercise, and we're like the midget and the hooker.

"Who do you think you're going to please with that?"

The midget grinned. "Me."

Maybe it's just because I'm HDK's alt, but this whole story cracks me up every time I read it!

interact with readers. Normally, we do not comment on our stories, but this is unique, so if you have questions, ask away. You must wonder what makes us tick, I know I do. I have been asked many times if my parents were married. If I am a Brit, and what used condoms taste like. Ask Todd about weapons. Q about BBQ's. Randi about split infinitives. Jezzaz about tinsel town. Stefan about driving VWs. GitM about her bra size. Oshaw about almost anything. Opportunities like this do not come along often.

Or at the very least, chickens. Maybe mutton if you're from Kentucky, or beef if you're from Texas. And I can tell you right now which sauce is the best. It's the one you're eating wherever you're at, be it vinegar, red peppers, and spices in the coastal Carolina style, or the sticky sweet sauce of the Piedmont area. It can be mustard based in Alabama. One guy in Texas uses mayo for a base. I'd have to taste that to give an opinion. My late brother in law was a renowned 'pig cooker', and he used A1 sauce and coke. It looked like dirty motor oil, but it tasted great. The variants are infinite.

Don't even get anyone started on how to cook it. You'd get your ass kicked in my part of the world if you used gas. Charcoal is acceptable, barely. I think hickory is overrated, and I use cherry wood almost exclusively, and inject the Boston butts with a little grape juice. I also use peach and apple wood, thanks to the many orchards in my area. I was thinking about mesquite one day, and decided the local wild hedge was close enough, and cooked over that. It was pretty good and I had a ball when my friends tried to pinpoint the wood I'd used. There was alcohol involved in that adventure.

I've eaten barbequed raccoon, deer, and bear, and it was all pretty good. Alligator not so much, armadillo and rattlesnake you would do well to avoid. I've got beaver on my creek now, and one ol' boy is determined to get one, to see what it taste like. I've even eaten barbequed possom, but they're better roasted, with a sweet potato in their mouth.

How come Q get barbecue and I get split infinitives? I don't want to stupidly talk about stupid infinitives. You talk to me it damn well better be about shoes.

It's disappointing to learn that your favorite writers are such dicks and assholes. The juvenile banter back and forth, we get it, you like each other and enjoyed this collaboration, but really the story is a 2 or 3 star so far. As to why folks keep reading in spite of the mediocrity of the story, it is because it was so hyped by people we trust that have delivered fantastic results in the past, ie the Westerns, the Mystery's, individually, etc. We are hoping to see the same quality as we have enjoyed in the past.

For you guys to be so sensitive to honest criticism, and dismissive of it, kinda diminishes you, you would be better not saying anything. Oh well, we are all human.

.. if you don’t like it - and for sure, you don’t have to - then my advice would be to let reading any more of this go, since there is quite a lot more of the same.

The thing is, yes, it’s a silly rambling thing, as most chain stories are. There’s not that much real attempt at plot, since that would require planning, and we didn’t do any of that. As has been said, this is more stream of consciousness improv than it is structured story.

I think that, for us, that was part of the attraction. None of us had a plot in mind or anything particular to make the story ‘about’, so to speak, so by definition it meanders and that’s part of the fun.

Yes, I can quite see that those expecting the normal fare we produce when we work alone might be a little disappointed; I’m sorry about that. I think though, you may be expecting this to be something it’s really not. I say that that without apology, but not as an attempt to demean anyone’s expectations either.

No one is dumb for wishing this was something else. It’s just not that though, and if it’s not to anyone’s taste, well... I’m sorry. It is what it is though.

Speaking a little for the others involved in this, I don’t think anyone is trying to be a juvenile jerk here. Just have a little fun and possibly open up a little with who we actually are as individuals. As HDK said, we almost never comment on our own stories, but here, we can let our hair down a bit more, so to speak.

Randi , dancing shoes , thoughts ?

HDK , What is your profession ? In my mind I'm down to Professor of Literature or head writer for Johnny Carson .

Q , notice you didn't mention turtle , wise choice ! ( Hickory , at least scaly bark type , is wonderful ! )

GITM , I'm guessing they've gotta be D's at least , due to your very large descriptive abilities ! ( the best in Lit , btw )

Todd , your thoughts on the 5.56 nato vs 5.45 by 39 vs 5.8 by 42 ?

Jezzaz , just how high is the smugness factor in Tinseltown ?

Stev2244, have you ever driven a Porshe at top speed on the Autobahn ?

And finally , Oshaw , what are your tips for cooking beef by sous-vide ?

I have been selling real estate for quite some time. I appreciate your interest and remember Johnnie Carson fondly. Thanks for the questions. I, too, eagerly await GitM's response to your question!

You appear to have some sort of bug up your ass. Much as readers look forward to stories by certain writers, we look forward to reading comments by certain readers. We very seldom interact on our stories, but we have abandoned any semblance of normal conduct on this story. We writers are now talking about what has made you so unhappy and why you are irked that we are having fun with a simple tale. Jezzaz expressed it perfectly. This may not be what you had hoped, or expected. It happens, but why do you allow this stuff to upset you? We are quite capable of handling criticism. Some of us thrive on it. Why hang in there now that you know you will disappointed, and that we really are assholes and dicks, which is not a criticism, but an attempt at an insult. If I didn't already know I am an asshole, I'd be offended? It all seems odd.

I see for your bio you are from my home state, Pa. I still have a home and property there. I don't remember running into any Patillies in my neighborhood, so I assume you are father west and/or south. Do you feel that your sense of humor and ability to enjoy life is representative of your part of Pa?

Yes, I did.

I owned a 911 turbo a few years ago and I have indeed tried that, but it's scary as hell. You need to get up on a Sunday morning at 4 or 5 a.m. because you need a lot of empty road.

Not everyone from PA is so negative, and I, for one, am enjoying this writing exercise very much. Can't wait to see where it goes... Thanks to all involved for sharing your talents!

This is hilarious and the effort to keep within the established boundaries and keep it rolling just proves the skill of the writers.

Anony's, until you write something and post it for all to critique you will never get it. I just submitted my second story now awaiting L release. There is a lot of work (and fun) in doing these. I just wish I had the devious talent and discipline these writers have. Hooyah!

And yes I post under another L pseudonym to minimize bias contamination/connections.

Hollywood is both more ridiculous and less ridiculous than you might imagine, depending on what your perception is by everyone else.

If you are hot, then no one is going to disagree with anything you say. They are just keen to ride those coattails as much as they can.

If you aren't hot, then the truth - as seen from any given perspective - will be delivered to your face in often the most brutal and blunt way possible.

And sometimes that can happen by the same people in the same week.

You have to understand what Hollywood actually is - it's a money making factory who's product is mostly The Young and to a less degree, Oldies who are still proven draws. That's it. Everything else that happens there is a result of that one main thrust.

Art is a very distant second to commerce _unless_ it's Oscar time, and then there'll money spent making Oscar bait movies, because EVERYONE is massively insecure, and EVERYONE needs some external entity to validate their existence.

Thank you! And you bet!

can think of shit like this? I've got tears of laughter and my abs are getting tired from laughing.

Laugh, giggle, chuckle, tee-hee, what imaginations we have here!

Hilarious. Making reading fun again. I am not quite sure about the critics. But will supply 5 stars in their honor.

I laughed so hard I had to catch my breath and my stomach muscles were sore. Sorry some of the folks don't get it.

Did a 7 year old Delaney jump the dozer into the pool? Practice for her K2 career?