All Comments on 'Gold Plated Lighter'

Storyline was good but you need a better proofreader and editor.

Reread your own story 5 or 6 times before submitting, that can help you find the mistakes. . Far too many typos and errors.

Decent premise! Bad translation!

My disclaimer: I like most of Winterfrog's stories.

But:

This story was the lowest common denominator LW story. It felt like it came out of some computer program that was preloaded with the basic tenants of the standard LW story and told: generate a story with a Scandinavian accent.

It took every standard cliche and included it in the story. Hey, at least it was austere: no random facts not associated with the basic premise to distract us.

Nothing new here. A lot of old here. Sorry. Thumbs down on this one.

Like Winterfrog, English is not my first language, however that's not much of an excuse to publish poorly written dreck. As a 'english-as-a-second-language' fellow myself I find it terribly difficult to read things where there are repeated misspellings or incorrect grammar issues.

One reviewer here even said to read what you've written aloud 5 or 6 times, and you will most likely catch your mistakes; I know I used the same technique for many years until I was satisfied with my wielding of the nuances of the english language.

As to the story itself, Winterfrog needs to stop prefacing every story with "my Scandinavian town"; I swear, every story of his starts with that same line in the very first paragraph. It's repetitious to the point of frustrating.

This story itself, well, I see it as 'boilerplate'. Nothing too exciting or different from the thousands of others just like it to deserve a comment on the plot or characters.

Thanks.

Tschüss!

...absolutely awful!

I want those five minutes of my life back.

We always look forward to your interesting tales - thanks for your efforts. Debra & Wayne

It's fiction, It's supposed to be for FUN< not a Damn English Assignment!

Winterfrog your stories are always FUN! and also a good read. Keep up the GOOD Work!

Rob Conners

The English was a little rough in spots, but not enough to distract from the story.

I say to the author, "Well Done", for a very good story.

Thanks

Your stories are pretty good, but you need an editor. For example you wrote:

"Be sure that I'll get you regret it." This is not correct. It needs to be "Be sure you're going to regret it." Which is grammatically correct, but still would never be spoken by a native English speaker. What I would say would be something like "I'm going to make sure you regret it." In another story you wrote you had a wife yell "Are you insane?" when a husband accused her of infidelity. It's grammatically correct, and you could say this, but in colloquial speech you would hear something like "You're crazy if you think I'm having an affair." Most of your mistakes are with prepositions to, for, at, of etc. This is understandable because when you think about it, often there is no real reason for choosing one over the other, and yet it brands you as a non native speaker. Most of the errors could easily be corrected if you sent it to an editor.

was a nice plot device... but I can't figure out why

he did not put it originally out of the circuit and advertise it as

found in order tp establish the identity of the poacher. Given

the existence of the pre-marital agreement I do not see why he

bothered getting pictures. The gold lighter was enough evidence and

it would have been fun to see what kind of story was invented to explain it's

presence! Basically the third time she refused on a Tuesday he should have said he was divorcing her to see what she would do...

Does need editing by a person who uses English as a first language. I agree with the previous commentor that the story would have been more fun focused just on the lighter.

I commented on your last story that it wasn't up to scratch for WINTERFROG. Glad to see you're back on form. Keep it up.

Always enjoy your stories. Good to still have a few writers posting here that won't put up with cheating wives.

I have always enjoyed the quirky phrasing that results from a language translation but this story was just very bad in some places as has been pointed out by some others. You need a better editor if you are going to publish in English. I like your story lines in general because the men are clear thinkers and take action. The women unfortunately are often weak characters and just act stupidly to set up the story. It would be nice to see stronger women that are more of a challenge for their men. I'm glad he had a pre nup. I've become convinced that marriage rights are non existent and the only way to get fair treatment is to spell out ahead of time what is expected out of the marriage and what the result will be if it ends, especially due to infidelity. There should be no rewards (50% of assets) for cheating. That works both ways.

thanks for another great story..

Don't wait so long for the next one. Cheers Roger.

A poor story that could have been good. Its refreshing to see stories where cheating is not rewarded and the people cheated on don't simply take it. That being said, more editing for grammar would really have helped the story. Slipping from past tense to current tense and from first person to third person certainly didn't help, either.

I liked the story. I abhorred the writing. Please find an editor who is literate in the English Language.

Ignore the idiots that haven't tried to learn a second language. I was raised and know english and I remember the trouble all had in learning to use it 'properly'. Your writing is getting better over the years, keep writing and I'll keep reading...even though I don't always like the outcome of the story.

automatically gets you 5 stars, bravo sir

He could have made it up with her for the sake of the children.

A confession and retaking of vows in the presence of family and friends would have been appropriate.

With children, he should have offered to continue the relationship in return for wild cards equal to the number of cheating sessions and confinement in a chastity belt whenever he had doubts about her fidelity. A few hard spankings would also not come amiss.

The "story" is pathetic and grammar is atrocious !

Why the hell do you "write" if you don't know the language???

I am the anon below you. I was impressed with your response and after checking found that you are absolutely correct. Good work.

Cheers. Ross.

Otherwise the story was very good and I rated it 4**** and deducted only 1* for the physical violence.

but you have to light up somehow. Read the warning labels on your vows. TK U MLJ LV NV

to the "fuck-chamber" with you all!

Maybe it should be called the "cuck-chamber" for those turds...

"Please take me back. It was only this one time..."

DON"T CHEAT ON YOUR SPOUSE

CONSEQUENCES ABOUND.

See I am trying to be nice...

HA

I would have given it a .001%, but you got my 5....bill

LOL

"1*" !!!

abruptly buggered cornhole, he gulped hot semen, betrayed!

all cheaters deserve nothing in life hope she catches a disease.

I usually like your stories and this was a good one til I saw you allowed that skank to stay with het spouse for 3months. That fucked the story.

It seems that once filed the parties often remain in the same hose until they fond new accommodation - and co-exist but are then free of obligation to each other - a strange p[rocress but seemingly enforced not just voluntary -

Quick but good -

And that is that Anna who lied quickly when she got caught as to the number of times that she fucked Robert, nowhere in this story did Anna every explain why. I also noticed that after she was kicked out of her marital home she moved right with Robert and then not much later explaining to friends that before she got caught she and Robert were about to breakup (of course there is absolutely no evidence of that since she was caught fucking Robert. She went to say that she felt that everyday with Robert was worse than any day with her ex-husband and family, Of course it should be noted that the day she said that she also was probably looking forward to being fucked by her now roommate. With the consistent behavior of deceit and falsehoods and her consistent infidelity her character is this story is very despictable.

and you cant even smoke green grass TJ U MLJ LV NV

if not how can you get satisfaction. TK U MLJ LV NV

no wimps here

The story was ok but due to the grammer it doesn't flow.

you need a proof reader and editor real bad.

I had to stop reading as the grammar was not good. I appreciate that English is a second or third language, therefore, you need a proof reader.

for anything bonnietaylor2/vastiesmith2 approved.

And now everyone thinks he has an even smaller penis cuz she wasn't satisfied with her husbands dick and went looking for something bigger!! Too funny.

I liked the part where the cheating couple's underwear looks like the Ukranian flag.

Wow, I wish American laws on p*** over the internet where as light as Scandinavians. If we sent pictures of two people screwing to a business like he did we wind up in jail for a quite a while especially since we sent it from our email address. Got to love your guyses laws

You need to find a proof reader/editor to clean up the language errors in your stories before you post them.

The story wasn't great but not bad so I gave it 3 stars.

I'm still reading your stories. This was submitted in 2010 and I've seen a great improvement in proofreading and editing.

Don't know about the meaning in Panamanian but in German schwanze, as you probably know, means tail or more crudely dick.

B.T.B. Extraordinaire!.......I enjoyed it immensely! ★★★★★ WOOF!

Love the Frog's stories. No beating around the bush. Search, find, fix, and destroy. No prisoners.

This sentence really caught my attention: "I will never take Anna back though Anna says that Richard and she are expected to split up in the near future." They are expected to split up in the future? Do it or don't do it. If you plan, you're just calculating. Not a ringing endorsement for a future wife. Good story.

Looks like you wrote the whole story drunk as hell or in mid of a half sleepless night.

Hey anon below....you make a wonderful misogynist. You do realize that a STORY or STORIES in no way prove your comment that was "Same as many other stories on this site. And reinforces my oponion, simply that a woman is nothing more than a life support system for her CUNT". Facts and reality should reinforce opinions, not stories written by good and bad authors. I guess Fox News is your MENSA.

Another good original finding of cheating. Well done.

For the rest of BTB amateurs here read this:

"My marriage was crushed in pieces so there was no reason for me to let that cheating asshole Richard have a happy marriage with his lovely wife. Action had to be taken as soon as possible."

This is how 99.99% of real men would react, not like in regular LW BTB stories where they "fall down on their knees, cry, throw up, do not want to hurt children, do not want to hurt the other family, leave the house with suitcases, find hotel/motel room then another apartment ..." and superbeautiful dream rebound is immediately waiting for them all the while whining about "unjust" legal system.

Of course, with a lot of sermonizing monologues toward the wife while she goes knee-walking and begging for reconciliation for many years leaving thousands of text messages and making hundreds of phone calls, crying and professing her love.

What is it with people & the word "mistake" when they make excuses about things.

It's a Decision...plain & simple!

He screwed her, it was her decision to get screwed & he decided to screw her....no mistake as in picking the wrong penny candy from a store shelf!

This wasn't a bad story. however I can tell English is not your first language, you should really think about getting an editor before you submit work. it was difficult reading this.

@FantasyTrain All mistakes are decisions. That's the bloody definition. People make poor decisions that why we call them mistakes, because they are decisions that they wish they'd made otherwise.

I think you're confusing it with the word 'accident' which traditionally means something outside of your control, an 'act of god'.

Everyone make mistakes, does things which produce outcomes they hadn't intended, however obvious the inevitability of outcome might be to an outside observer. We generally forgive people for mistakes based upon severity of outcome, remorse and their learning from it.

Terrible grammar in this story. Difficult to read at best. Please Try using an editor to establish a good English format, otherwise this if one can read between the lines, it can be navigated.