Note: You can change font size, font face, and turn on dark mode by clicking the "A" icon tab in the Story Info Box.
You can temporarily switch back to a Classic Literotica® experience during our ongoing public Beta testing. Please consider leaving feedback on issues you experience or suggest improvements.
Click here
He vaguely remembered his finger slipping in her ass, and thinking, one hour Rita, that's all you got, before I get this again!
- COMMENTS
Anonymousover 9 years ago....what you have not read, Anon!
A great deal of QW's material challenges me. I loved this story! More, MORE!! Please add to this one, as it has more waiting to be said.
That said, and I 've chided you for this before, QW. You need editorial help. This was very rough. A war of commas and fragmented sentences, massive misspellings and broken ideas....dreadful difficult to get through.....this story, like most of your contributions, begs for a good house cleaning.
Please take more pride in your work. Revise, clean up, rewrite, adjust and polish the story. Ask for help, if you can bear it. You have an ability to convey feeling and make people seem real in your stories....but the presentation is technically very rough (almost like a rough draft) and so reduces you to an irritant for many readers.
Some will simply criticize without reading, because you make the task too difficult for them.
If you make our task more pleasant and easier to execute (by making your stories easier and more comfortable to read), you will probably experience fewer criticisms of your efforts and so the gratitude and praise will predominate.
Take the time, make the effort to smooth out your telling of a thing. It will be worth it.
Oh, and for the record, I LOVED this story. Tough as it was to read, it resonated with me.
Anonymousover 9 years agoNot bloody likely.
I now know this author, and will not read his(?) work.
Out of fairness, I will also not vote, because I haven't read it, even though I know the rating would have been 1 star.
Good luck to the rest of you.
SEVERUSMAXover 9 years agoStill, the title intrigued and so I read it. Not bad, overall, except that the guy was a little whiny and the otherwise hot sex was partly messed with by such unattractive details as brown shit stains on Harry's dick. I could have done without that image. Still, the developing love triangle shows promise, a lot more than typical qualitywheat work to date.
