Home for Horny Monsters Ch. 071

"What's that?"

Kisa fixed Beth with a hard stare. "My memories are like a bad CD. They skip over songs and play things on repeat no matter how many times you push those buttons.

"But the memories I do have? They're vibrant. I get to live through them like I'm stuck in a bad dream. And every time I wonder about being human again, I remember how I got here."

Her hands touched her throat, and she let out a sigh. "It was an accident. I got hit by a car just when my life was gettin' good. Both of my legs were destroyed. I came from the streets, and dance was gonna be my ticket to a better future. Instead, my life was over. That's when we turned to magic. We tried to mend my legs with magic we didn't understand. I think you know what happened next."

She stretched out and gestured at her body. Her tail twitched behind her for emphasis. "This was my cost. A transformation I had no control over. I came here for help and found Emily instead. She forced me to continue my transformation until it suited her needs. It was a sequence of events we could have never predicted, but it all started with jumping in blind. The next time you think that you know better, I think you should remember that you don't. If it's something you really wanna dabble in, you should speak to someone who knows their shit, like Ratu. And you should keep in mind that she doesn't even want to touch this book until she's better. If a snake deity with hundreds of years of experience is wary of this fucking thing, then you should be, too."

Kisa slammed the book shut, scattering the letters into the air where they melted into smoke. She handed the book back to Beth.

"Never rush into magic unless you have no choice." As Kisa spoke, her green eyes glowed. "You know why that thing has an apple on it? I think it's a warning. That book is full of forbidden knowledge and you're about to get your ass thrown out of the Garden for biting into it."

Beth sighed, then nodded. Kisa was right. The Grimoire would wait until Ratu could properly look through it. She looked over at Opal, who nodded in agreement. Even the slime knew better than she did.

"Here," she said, holding the book out to Tick Tock. The mimic opened its flaps and she dropped the book inside, then sat down with a groan and examined the smoldering mess she had left on the table. She was still hungry, and now the room stank of smoke.

She used a rag from the kitchen to wipe down the table. Luckily, the dark marble was unmarred by her culinary experiment. In fact, the table seemed to absorb what little light there was in the room. Curious, she ran her fingers along the surface. It was smooth to the touch, and felt like it was vibrating beneath her fingers.

Beneath the couch, she heard a clicking sound. She bent over to look but was interrupted by Lily, who knocked on the door.

"They're back," she announced, then pointed outside. Beth stood and watched as the mist swirled and billowed away, revealing the angel and his three riders. Death was already moving toward them, his pace casual.

"Guess I'd better go." She picked up Tick Tock as she stood, pausing long enough to grab the instructions from Opal before moving into the living room. Reggie and Jenny were already waiting by the front door, where the Rat King held up the Risk box for her to grab.

"Let's go start an incident of our own, shall we?" Beth took the box and then picked Jenny up and cradled her like an infant. In the back of her mind, she could hear the doll's maniacal laughter.

🏠🏠🏠

The caves were cold at first, but soon became warmer than the outside air. Yuki had conjured a few balls of foxfire that floated along with the group, and Mike relied on them to see where he was going. He also had a flashlight, but decided to save the batteries for the inevitable betrayal that would lead to the group being separated. They would be forced to escape the caves while being chased by spear-wielding boulder people who spat lava and farted fire.

The owl-woman, who had never given her name, was waiting for them at the opening to a large chamber. Flickering lights beyond the entryway cast long, ominous shadows through stalactites and soda straws on the ceiling which gave him an impression of a fearsome maw. He scowled in discomfort, half expecting to see a council of mythical creatures on the other side. They would all be sitting in a circle, ready to demand God only knew what from him.

He was wrong. The opening formed into a series of tunnels that contained glowing stones for illumination. Large columns vanished into the darkness above, revealing a massive chamber that was easily a hundred feet high in places. Holes in the bedrock revealed little hovels where Nirumbi families watched them from behind faded leather curtains.

"How can this be?" muttered Bigfoot. He was still hunched over, despite the tunnel's height. "I thought maybe a few had survived their war with the tribes, but this? This is unprecedented. "

The owl-woman fixed Bigfoot with a stern gaze. "We are all capable of change. The Nirumbi, once fierce warriors who roamed the plains, learned long ago to live beneath the Earth and have forsaken many of their warrior ways. They have done this for many generations along the mountain ranges of your country." She directed this comment to Mike.

"But surely someone would have seen them?" He looked over at a nearby hovel in time to see a pair of adults grab a child and pull them back inside. From what he could see, the males looked just like the females, so he had no way of knowing gender. Did they even have males and females? Or maybe it was asexual reproduction? The thought of watching one of the Nirumbi slowly split into two gave him the shivers.

The owl-woman sighed. "Your people have, but do not often live to tell the tale. You see, it is easy to make a human disappear when you eat it and toss its bones down a well inside a cave."

"Barbaric." Velvet snorted from behind Mike. "So, what, they just catch and kill whoever they wish?"

The owl-woman dipped her head. "Some do. You see, the Nirumbi are at an important crossroads in their evolution. Many of them see the wisdom to keep to themselves and only feast on non-sentient beings. Others wish to return to their warrior ways. Leeds is the reason so many of them attacked you."

"Is he their leader?" Mike asked.

"In a way." The owl-woman gestured for them to follow. The Nirumbi he spotted gave him determined looks, but he didn't see any of the ferocity that he had earlier.

They continued through the tunnels, revealing that hundreds of Nirumbi families lived there.

"Did they do all this?" Mike asked, gesturing to the stone-cut homes. He was surprised when Bigfoot answered.

"No," he said. "These caves were already here."

"They were," agreed the owl-woman. "The Nirumbi are dying out. Despite having caves to live in, they still require the world above the ground to survive. After many close calls with the humans, the men with swords came and began an extermination."

"The Order?" asked Velvet.

"Yes." The owl-woman was walking down the tunnel, but her head turned a hundred and eighty degrees to face them. "Years ago, Leeds came to the Nirumbi and promised them a land where they could be free. In exchange, he needed their help to conquer it."

"That's a super dick move," Mike told her. "To just show up on my back porch and start shooting arrows at everyone."

"Your ancestors had no problem taming these lands with steel and gunpowder," she replied. "If you have a better suggestion for the Nirumbi, I would love to hear it."

"Why Leeds?" This came from Dana. "I saw all those creatures out there. Clearly, they didn't come help him fight. Why did the Nirumbi get to do all the dirty work while they just sat back? Except for the Wendigo, of course."

"There were a few reasons for doing so." Her head swiveled around and she took them down a narrow side passage. There were fewer Nirumbi living in this part of the cave. "The first is that he promised he could get everybody into this land. This was a feat that took him many years, and there were those who didn't believe he could do it."

"Opening a door doesn't make you a leader," Yuki said.

"Correct. What made him a leader was something he told us about called the Great Game."

Mike had been paying close attention to his surroundings, but now his interest was focused solely on the owl-woman.

"What did he say?" he asked.

"Only a human soul could participate in the game, and despite his demonic appearance, his soul is that of a mortal. The plan was to take this land from the current Caretaker by any means. He claimed that he could protect the vulnerable children of the forest, but only if he was in charge."

"What else did he say? And where did he learn about the Great Game?"

The owl-woman shook her head. "I do not know. Leeds is many things, but a reliable narrator is not one of them. I only heard this information third hand, and always after he had moved on. He has been preparing for many years now, and many thought he was a liar."

Mike nodded. "But then he actually brought them here."

"He sent out the call, and the children of the forest listened." The owl-woman stopped and turned toward Bigfoot. "You of all people should know that they have no leader. They were easily swayed by promises of a better world, much like you were."

Bigfoot held up his massive hands. "I'm not going to argue the point," he grumbled.

Mike looked at the owl-woman, and then Bigfoot. A thought occurred to him. "You don't want Leeds in charge," he said, "that's why you need me."

The owl-woman's head twisted to look at him. "It is. You see, some of us have doubted Leeds' intentions all along, and his efforts to displace you have created a momentary breach of trust. The Nirumbi do not wish to continue feeding their warriors to your guardians, and many of the others fear retribution. The warriors of the Nirumbi are the next generation, and between you and the Wendigo, they have already been halved. We now find ourselves at a tipping point where all that we want is finally within reach, but the cost has already been too high. We have seen the company you keep, and wonder if there is a better way."

"They want my permission to stay, don't they?"

The owl-woman sighed. "They do. We are tired of fleeing from your people, Caretaker. The Order has forced us to remain hidden from your world, which means we cannot retaliate in kind as our homes are bulldozed. This place is a sanctuary, an untouchable piece of paradise where they can live and be free."

"I doubt this." Bigfoot sneered at the owl-woman. "Even if the Nirumbi are planning on playing nice from now on, I saw the creatures of the forest you had gathered out there. Some may be happy to piss away their days without bothering anyone, but you have a collective who's-who of man-eating monsters up there."

"Really." Mike looked from Bigfoot to the owl-woman. "I'm not keen on hosting creatures that will fight and potentially kill me or my friends."

The owl-woman nodded. "And yet you did not see them attack you. But I do not expect that to be the proof you need to change your heart. There is more to see."

They followed her through a large cave with thick stalactites. The dripping water sounded almost like rain, and he could see thick tree roots up above. How far down beneath the ground were they?

"While Leeds is gone, it may be possible for you to win over the forest children by agreeing to let them stay, but I understand your hesitance. I would tell you my own story before we get to our destination. You see, I am one of these creatures that Bigfoot would warn you about. My sisters and I -- we used to hunt and devour humans."

"Tale as old as time. Please, continue." Mike waved his hand for her to go on.

The owl-woman looked back at him as if judging his comment, but continued. Her soft voice barely echoed in the cave. "You see, we didn't need to eat humans. Not only were they easy prey, but their parts made great materials for rituals. But we paid a price. There were once five of us. I lost three of my sisters to the tribes of this land. We only had ourselves to blame, if I'm being truthful. After their deaths, it occurred to us that maybe we were, in fact, wrong.

"My remaining sister and I decided that maybe it was time to understand the human world better, but we erred. We took a human child from his village and tried to raise him as our own."

"That didn't go well for you, did it?" Mike asked.

"It did not. Though we tried to offer the boy the secrets of our magic, thinking it would be enough, he betrayed us instead and returned to his people. When he led them back, we were caught off guard and our home was destroyed. My sister died, but I was lucky and managed to escape." She stopped and put her hand on a rocky outcropping. Her clawed fingers ticked on the stone like an old clock.

"What happened, then?" Velvet asked.

"I am the last of my kind. When I die, my legacy goes with me." The owl-woman suddenly looked tired. "So I decided to try and become family with the others of the land, to pass on my knowledge. I encountered the Nirumbi decades back, and they revered me as an elder. Many of them came to realize that the old ways are gone, and it is time to adopt new methods of survival. That is part of the reason why I am here, the others look to me for guidance as well. I know that Leeds will outlive me. I would see the Nirumbi become something better than even I could be, but they will not do so with Leeds in charge. He hates humans, and will spend his life forging the children of the forest into a terrible weapon to use against them."

She turned to Mike, her eyes suddenly wide. "But we cannot guide the children of the forest without you. Take away their reason for fighting, and Leeds loses his power over them. They are capable of learning, and I am not afraid to teach them the ways of peace."

Mike shook his head. "So, you want me to, what? Forgive them for nearly killing me?"

"Yes." She bowed her head in supplication. "But do not speak your decision yet. For we have arrived."

Mike looked around but saw nothing out of the ordinary. Bigfoot, however, let out a grunt, then frowned.

"This way," he said, then crouched down to crawl through an opening that had been hidden in the wall.

The darkness was difficult to navigate, but he found himself in a large chamber. Up above, large stony spikes glistened in the light of the foxfire. Multiple levels in the chamber made him realize that it had been carved out of the rock. The others came through and stood silently behind him.

"Where are we?" he asked, his voice gobbled up by the dark spaces above.

"The cave of the dead. The Nirumbi fear this place," replied the owl-woman. She pointed out into the center of the chamber, and Velvet gasped.

It was covered in tiny skeletons, hundreds of them. They were curled up on the ground, their remains undisturbed. Mike moved into the middle of the chamber, his heart pounding. The tallest of the lot were perhaps four feet tall, and he could see the spiked protuberances at the front of their skulls. They were mostly mummified and still had their clothing and hair.

They were goblins.

"How did this happen?" Mike asked.

Bigfoot grunted, then wiped his nose. "Many years ago, the goblins emerged from the cave. They attacked our family, and we retaliated in kind."

"I heard, but this?" Mike ran up one of the nearby ramps. The hovels here were similar to what the Nirumbi lived in. He looked inside of one to see a goblin's remains lying across several smaller goblins. "You killed all of them?"

"There was no choice, Caretaker. We could not reason with them, they attacked us on a daily basis. It came down to them or us, and we won."

"Uncle Foot?" Velvet looked at her uncle with a mixture of awe and horror. "There are whole families here."

"I know." Bigfoot winced. "For your parents, your survival was far more important. This was not a choice made lightly."

"How did you do it?" Mike shook his head in shock. The goblin homes were everywhere. "I thought they were immune to poison."

Bigfoot grunted. "It wasn't easy. Ana and Darren spent weeks mapping out this cave system. Once it was done, they figured out the passageways where the air was coming in and then sealed them off. The goblins here had rituals that involved the phases of the moon. When we knew they would all be here worshipping their gods, we set up generators and flooded the tunnels with carbon monoxide. It was done in such a way that goblins sent to investigate the noise died first. Their bodies were immune to poison, but they still needed air to breathe."

Horrified, Mike sat down on one of the ledges. From where he sat, he could make out the central dais of the chamber. A figure in ceremonial garb lay nearby, the fabric now moldy from the dampness of the cave. Velvet's parents had slaughtered the goblins while they had essentially been attending church.

"There had to be a better way," he muttered. But was there? If the goblins kept attacking them, then there would have been no option. Still, to see that an entire tribe of goblins had been wiped out?

"Evil is in the eye of the beholder. The goblins didn't see themselves as evil, they were just doing what they have always done. This was the price they paid." The owl-woman transformed and flew toward the top of the cave. "I have one last thing to show you," she said, after transforming back.

He didn't want to see. The owl-woman had already made her point. But he stood and followed. A cool hand found his, and he looked into Velvet's eyes.

"I had no idea," she told him. "I always thought they drove them off, or at least killed them in battle."

He nodded, then navigated his way up the path. The footing was treacherous, but Velvet had no problem with it. She supported him until they got to the top. The ceiling was low and the passage led to a narrow chamber.

"Here." The owl-woman pointed at the back of the cave. Mike clicked on his flashlight and almost dropped it.

In the back of the cave, a rudimentary bookshelf had been carved into the wall. There were a few books still on the shelf, but they had long ago turned into little more than paper mush. On the nearby wall, he saw that someone had drawn symbols in dark paint. In crude letters, someone had practiced the alphabet over and over again, until the letters culminated in a declarative statement that sat away from the others.

I LYKE TO TINKR

TINKR IS ME NAME

Beneath the words there was a series of stick figures that were clearly meant to be goblins. They were drawn with angry faces and clubs standing around a tiny goblin with tears on her face and knees pulled up to her chest.

"Tink," he muttered. He had never thought to ask where she came from, and she had never brought it up. What little he did know was that the other goblins hadn't liked her. Is this where Emily found her? How had the goblins come to be here in the first place?

"The goblins were ready to evolve. If one could learn to read and write, then why not more?" The owl-woman hung her head. "Alas, we can never know. If they hadn't been exterminated, this one could have led them to a brighter tomorrow. I wanted you to see this, Caretaker, so that you would better understand why we can never predict the future of an entire species based on the truths of their past. Good men can become evil, and evil men can find redemption. Why not an entire people? My story alone may not be enough to sway you, but this should. The goblins have been seen as irredeemable for centuries, but this? This is proof that they had the potential to change, to be better than what they were."

Mike reached out to touch the letters on the wall. How many decades had they been there?