Home for Horny Monsters Ch. 096

Even Death's scythe had been decorated, wrapped up in red and white ribbon. A fur-lined stocking with his name hung from the far end of it, bulging with candy and small gifts. He turned around toward the fireplace and waved at the flames.

Christmas Present chuckled. "Santa wanted me to bring him back. He's been a great help, but he should spend the day with his family." She looked out the window. "As should you."

Lily snorted and stepped away from the giant. "Please. If you think you're just going to waltz into my day with that hot body and some dommy mommy vibes in order to make me change my stripes, you are sorely mistaken. I can't be fixed."

"Shame." The giant stroked Lily's cheek with an oversized hand. "Regardless, I heard from my sibling Christmas Future that Mike will be getting a very special present from you sometime around three o'clock. Something about a hot elf roleplay fantasy?"

Lily smirked. "Please. I'm going to set the bar for hot elf roleplay."

"Do you think he'd mind if I join in?" The spirit's eyes sparkled.

Lily laughed. "He's gonna need a new bed, isn't he?"

"Perhaps." Christmas Present ran her hands through Lily's hair. "Until later, then. Just remember, this is my day. I'm always watching." With that, the ghost transformed into silver specks of light that floated through the floor and disappeared.

"Watching me the whole day? That's kinda hot," Lily muttered, turning her attention outside. "Bet she's been getting worked up all day staring at Romeo. Probably watched that romp he had with Beth last night, too."

"Lily, my dear friend!" Death wrapped his arm around Lily's shoulder and held up a cellphone. The Grim Reaper snapped a selfie of the two of them and tucked the phone away in his pocket. "I had the most amazing time at the North Pole! Santa said I can come with him every year to deliver presents if I wish! I'm going to meet so many children in the years ahead. Isn't that great?"

"Sounds kinda dark when you put it that way," she said with a frown. "But I'm glad you're happy. And who gave you a phone?"

"Santa did, of course. It's so we can stay in touch. I can even send him emojis! It took us quite some time to get the North Pole put back together, and we are very good friends now." Death pulled a cloth bag from his robes that Lily recognized as the one they had lost to the Krampus. "By the way, Santa taught me how to do woodworking. Would you like to see?"

Lily fought the urge to roll her eyes. "Okay, what did you make in woodshop? Is it a birdhouse?"

Death held out a rectangular package wrapped in green paper. "There are no birds at the North Pole, my friend. Here, this is for you."

Lily took it with a frown. "What is it?"

"If I told you, then why bother wrapping it?" Death chuckled, the blue fire in his sockets shedding tiny sparks. "Open it!"

She slid her finger along the edge, using her nail to cut the paper. With one quick movement, she unwrapped the gift, revealing an ornate frame with decorative inlays made of sea glass.

"I collected those on our trip together," Death said, touching the different stones. "If you are interested, I can tell you where each one came from."

"Not right now." She stared at the frame for a moment, contemplating its beauty. It looked to be made from a single piece of wood, and she had no idea how he had embedded the sea glass inside of it. "It's beautiful, Death. Thank you."

"I made it from oak, because you're the strongest person I know." Death pulled some more gifts from his bag and set them under the tree for the others to find later. "And it is the perfect size for that drawing Reagan made for you."

A chill ran down Lily's spine and she glanced at the Reaper.

"You don't have to put that in there if you don't want to," Death continued, paying no special attention to her. "And I know what you're thinking. I would like to reassure you that this frame is just a gift and that I still owe you many favors."

"Very many," she added, narrowing her eyes.

Death nodded sagely. "Indeed. And should you ever wish to collect, you know where to find me. Ah!" He knelt down by the tree and picked up a package with his name on it. He gave it a shake and grinned. "This must be a new tea I haven't tried yet!"

"You can tell just by shaking it?" Lily asked.

Death nodded. "It's a trick I picked up on the road with Santa. If you'll excuse me, I am very excited to try it."

She watched the Reaper leave, then turned her attention to the picture frame. With trembling hands, she summoned Reagan's drawing and slid it into place. It was a perfect fit.

It felt like the room was spinning. She set the picture down on the table and contemplated it for a moment, hot tears filling her eyes. Outside, she heard the others laughing. The woman in the picture frame looked like she would fit right in with the festivities, unburdened by a shameful past.

"Damn it, Death." Grinding her teeth, she walked toward the front door, a coat and snow pants appearing on her body. She casually dodged the snow, crossing the yard to where Mike and Beth had built a small snow wall.

The snowball fight continued right up until Lily took Mike by the hand. He looked at her in surprise, then melted in her arms when she put her lips to his. She clutched his face in her hands, as if afraid he might disappear. The battle came to a standstill as her wings popped free behind her back. It was an involuntary reaction, but Mike didn't seem to care. When she broke the kiss, she stared into those beautiful eyes of his.

"I want my own room," she told him. "Here. For Christmas. A place that's just mine. I have a picture I want to put up in it."

"Uh, yeah! Sure!" He looked surprised, but genuinely excited. "Here, let's go inside and figure somethi--"

"No, not right now." She grabbed a generous quantity of snow with her tail and curled it up behind her. "I'm on Yuki's team."

With that, she smashed the snow into Mike's face, white-washing him until he fell over backward with a laugh. Beth grabbed Lily from behind, pinning her wings so she couldn't get away as Tink and Kisa pelted the succubus with snowballs. Abella swooped down and pulled Lily free, the succubus loudly vowing revenge on her attackers. When she looked down, it was to see that Tink was mooning her from atop her own fort.

The snowball fight was still stupid, childish at best. Laughter echoed across the yard, filling Lily for the first time with a different kind of warmth.

There was no place she would rather be.

The Jabberwock sat at attention, its serpentine neck elevated so that Yuki could sit on the end of his snout with a thermos full of hot chocolate. The others had gotten too cold hours ago, but she was content to sit outside and gaze out over the neighborhood.

A storm had blown in overnight, painting the world anew in a fresh white coat. Other than a couple of people out for a Christmas walk, the world was relatively untouched. Tomorrow, the streets would be plowed, and trash would start to pile up by the curb, mostly boxes and wrapping paper. But for now, it was perfect.

The front yard was a mess. Large chunks of yard had been revealed by displacing the snow, but even those looked small in comparison to the structures that had been built for the fight. She smiled, thinking about how happy everyone was to see a fresh blanket of the good stuff after waking. The fight had been Tink's idea, which surprised nobody.

With a thought, she commanded the yard to reset itself. Walls of ice fractured into soft powder that filled in the gaps, and a snowman with a giant carrot for a penis turned into three balls that unrolled themselves all over the yard. Within minutes, the yard looked as if nobody had ever been there, a blank canvas once more.

A chill breeze tousled Yuki's hair and she felt a presence behind her.

"Nice trick." Freyja sat down next to Yuki, causing the Jabberwock to snort. Yuki patted the beast, settling it down with her will. "Where'd you learn that?"

"Picked a few things up in the Arctic. You know how it goes." She offered her thermos to Freyja. "Do you want some? It's not as good as the stuff Santa has, but it's pretty close."

"No, but thank you." The goddess looked tired, her white hair longer than it used to be. "I thought I would drop by and see how you were doing."

"Me?" Yuki leaned back and smiled. "I'm doing great."

"I'm grateful to hear that." Freyja looked down at the yard. "I saw your snowball fight earlier. It looked like fun."

"You should have joined us." Yuki looked over at Freyja. "In fact, why didn't you join us? We didn't see you after the big fight. What happened?"

"I paid a rather large price for our victory." Freyja held out her hand. Curious, Yuki took it. "It took me some time to come to terms with it, but I finally have."

"Are you okay?" Yuki held the goddess' hand for a moment before realizing how warm it felt. "Freyja, what happened?"

"The world has changed, Yuki. As all things do." She gazed over at the house. "Have you ever wondered why the gods abandoned humanity?"

"Who hasn't? I know for a fact that gods exist, which kind of makes it worse. But who am I to question the will of the gods?" She opened up the thermos and drank straight from it. "You sure you don't want some?"

"We had no choice." Freyja let out a sigh. "During the battle for the North Pole, more of my memories returned. Disturbing ones. The gods didn't abandon this world on a whim, or even for self preservation. We were forced to flee from predators."

"Predators?" Yuki frowned. "Who would challenge the gods?"

Freyja's face twisted up. "We called them the Others. We used to call them the outsiders, but that isn't entirely accurate. They came through the cracks in this world, attacking the gods where they lived.

"What you don't know is that these Others surpassed us in strength and numbers. They couldn't be killed, at least not in a manner we were aware of. Many of us were slain, and the rest of us scattered. We didn't abandon mankind to save our own skins, though, I don't ever want you to think that." The goddess took her hand back from Yuki. "They were attracted to our power. That's how the Others found this world in the first place. We went into hiding to make this place harder to find, but that meant losing ourselves in the process."

"I see." Yuki looked over at the goddess. "So what does that mean for you now?"

"I'm not sure. But I had to make a choice. You see, as a goddess, I was the embodiment of many things. In a way, I have lost a right to many of those claims. There are those out there who still have faith in me, and it's time I do right by them. They deserve a reason to believe."

"So you're gonna be Freyja officially? Make a comeback?"

"In a way." Freyja grinned. "When the Others broke into this world, there was a man who had an insane idea on how to hold them back. He wanted to build something that would hold the cracks shut, like driving a screw into the edges of reality. It would be some of the most powerful magic that the world had ever seen, but it came at a heavy cost. He built several legendary artifacts, structures tied strongly together by our love of games. As long as these structures exist, the Others cannot come through and claim this world.

"Knowing this, I can't be the only one who survived. The other gods are out there somewhere, and I plan to find them. While the Others are locked away, we have the chance to build our strength anew for when they inevitably return. But we can't come back as we once were, this world is too different. New gods must rise to replace those who have fallen. Surely, this you understand."

"I do." Yuki's tails twitched behind her. "And I assume some of these new gods will be less than desirable?"

"Indubitably. I will need those I can trust to have humanity's interests at heart. Which is why I want to be the first to recognize you formally as the new goddess of winter." Freyja turned toward Yuki and bowed low with her hands together over her heart.

Yuki felt something shift inside her and gasped. "What did you do?"

"Recognized you and relinquished my title. During my fight at the North Pole, I was forced to choose. I couldn't be the goddess of so many things when my power was weak. My followers have prayed to me all these decades and never received an answer. And so I let certain things go. My divinity lives on inside of you, Yuki. I can feel it, like a distant heartbeat. I can no longer command the ice and snow as I once did. This power is now yours."

"But...that can't be right? I can't be a god, I don't even have all of my tails!" Yuki touched her chest. "It's not like I feel any different."

"And you won't. None of us became gods overnight. You now have a legacy to live up to as Old Man Winter." Freyja smirked. "Or you could always go by a cute name like Jack Fox."

"Ugh, no." Yuki wrinkled up her nose. "I don't want to be a god. I just want to stay here and be with my family."

"As you should." Freyja stood. "But now that I have recognized you as such, you are officially on the path. Your powers will grow, their boundaries set only by your determination. I will need others like you, someday. To become new beacons of light for the world, ready to stand and defend it when the time comes. And I shall become stronger, too. The age of miracles is about to return."

Down below, the front door of the house opened and Mike stepped out. He slipped something into his pocket and contemplated the fresh appearance of the front yard. He rubbed at his lower back and did a couple of stretches. Yuki noticed that Freyja watched him with a smile.

"You have plans for him, too." Yuki shook her head. "I can promise you that godhood isn't something he wants."

"I know. Some people chase greatness. Others have it thrust upon them."

"He wants what I do. A quiet life for his family."

"I know." Freyja grinned. "And that's what makes him so special." The wind picked up, ruffling Yuki's fur. Down below, Mike adjusted the collar of his jacket and zipped it up, oblivious that he was being watched.

"And what if I say no?" Yuki scowled at Freyja. "What if I don't want any part in this fight?"

"You don't have a choice. For you see, my dear kitsune, that man has become the Caretaker of several of these magical structures. Should he ever fall, it is possible that the world shall fall with him." Freyja's whole body became translucent as the wind carried her into the sky, and her voice became a whisper in Yuki's ears.

"Go forth, child of winter. Know that Freyja watches over you."

Stunned, Yuki stared into the empty sky. Below, she heard the crunching of footsteps as Mike made his way through the hedge maze to where the sundial sat. It looked like he was getting ready to reset it.

Eager to tell him what she had just learned, Yuki leapt from the Jabberwock's snout, commanding the snowbank below to catch her. Mike looked in her direction, then waved. He waited for her in the center of the maze.

"Hey," she said. "Freyja was just here."

"Oh really? How is she?"

"Fine, I guess. Gonna go out and find her followers and some of the other gods." Yuki gave Mike a brief summary of what she had learned.

"I see." He sighed. "Well, I quit expecting things to be quiet after our first apocalypse."

"Our last apocalypse," she corrected him.

"Probably not. The end of the world is relative, after all." He reached into his pocket and pulled out Tink's goggles.

"What are you doing with those?"

Mike grinned. "It's a surprise. Want to see?"

"Sure." She stood back as he pulled a small vial from his pocket. "Is that blood?"

"Sure is. A single drop of Santa's blood." Mike put his hands on the sundial, the lenses flicking into place. "I spent a lot of time in bed last night going over things in my head."

"From what I heard, you spent a lot of time in bed last night turning Tink into an air raid siren."

Mike winced. "Yeah, sorry about that. She was being a bit loud."

"More than a bit. And why does she call you her special hammer?" Yuki actually knew the answer to this, but absolutely loved seeing Mike turn beet red and squirm. "Also, I'm sure you both know this, but you never need to lube a hammer. It's a safety hazard."

Mike stared straight ahead. "God loves you," he muttered.

"What?"

"Just checking that you're not a certain succubus. Anyway, I was thinking about some stuff. Did you know that a drop of Santa's blood was what originally established the geas?"

Yuki shook her head. "Nobody knew where the geas had come from. We always just accepted that it was here."

He nodded. "Well, Santa informed me that I could use this to strengthen the geas even further. I talked it over with Ratu and I think we might be able to upgrade it. Make it even better than before."

"How are you going to do that?"

He turned and looked up at the house. "I've wondered more than once if the house was alive. On a few occasions, I've even spoken with the spirit that inhabits it. The North Pole has one, and so does the cabin. All part of some game I don't really care that much about, to be honest. All I want is to protect my home and my family from harm."

Mike held up the vial of Santa's blood. "Its rooms are already there, but forgotten. It changes shape before our eyes, reality rewriting itself to accommodate. Remind you of anything?"

"You think the house was built out of...an ancient one?"

"No. The spirit of this home is definitely grounded in our reality, but it makes me wonder: was it designed to mimic one? And for what purpose? Every time I get answers, it just creates more questions. Truthfully, the most important question I can ask is how to keep everybody safe." Mike set the vial down on the sundial and watched the stone timer click through its final minute. Once time ran out, a chill wind blew across the yard, making Yuki shiver. "So I'm going to do what the house does. We're going to hide in plain sight."

Mike looked at her, then back up at the house. "I will protect everyone," he said, raising his voice. "They say that home is where your heart is, but guess what? It doesn't have to be a place. It can be a friend, a lover, or a child. So if a geas can wrap itself around a piece of land, why not the people inside? And don't think for a moment that I'm doing it for you. I don't give a damn about your Architect or your game." He picked up the vial and pulled the stopper free. Yuki's ears popped and the fading light of day bent and warped around the opening of the vial.

"I'm doing this because I'm the Caretaker," he declared. "And these are the people I love." He dumped the single drop of blood onto the sundial, then summoned lightning into his hands. The air around him sizzled as he grabbed the sundial and gave it a twist.

The drop of blood became mercurial, coating the sundial in a silver gloss that Yuki could see her reflection in. Mike's magic was carried along with it, dancing across the ground and causing the earth beneath the snow to glow blue and purple. Mike's attention was on the sundial at first, and then he spun around and stared at the house.

Before their eyes, the house changed colors. Multiple variations of the home appeared, as if it was trying on different appearances. The Victorian home was suddenly a quaint cottage, then a stone fortress, followed by what looked like a fishing hut. It expanded rapidly, eventually settling on a proper manor with at least four floors. The structure had at least doubled in both length and depth, and large portions of the building had been replaced with intricate stonework. The turret over his bedroom was now matched in height only by the observatory on the opposite corner, and the placement of the windows indicated his room was now a private fifth floor. Balconies had protruded from numerous windows, which would allow their occupants to sit outside should they choose. Up above, thick stony ridges had formed, perfect for a certain gargoyle who enjoyed lurking