by Lost Boy
Wow, I really missed the editing - as it stands the story is confusing, but the material is convincing. 4 stars atm, will revisit to see if some editing has taken place. The story material is worth 5 stars. Good luck on your health problems.
This is a confusing mish-mash of conflicting themes and universes. Lovecraft and Emma Watson? Branch Davidians and aliens? Sci-fi Tech and passionless sex? Implants and sex drones and futanari droids? Too many themes moving in too many directions and not enough motivation or explication to tie them into a comprehensible story. Two stars was a gift. Try again?
Excellent story, very abrupt ending. Needs a second part to explain all the unexplained things.😀
Lots of good ideas, perhaps too many. The main character’s name is an unfortunate choice, since the reader has to constantly determine whether Al means AI (artificial intelligence with a capital I) or Al (his shortened first name with a lower case L).
Enjoyed it. First time reader of your work. This screams ‘serial’.
Will be digging into your back catalog.
~Spiny
A bizarre story at times difficult to follow, a typical Lost Boy story lMHO and l loved it for its sheer imaginative madness. More please!!!!!!????
5/5 for a brilliant adventure from left field.
Thank you and consider adding more to it, you have room.
Well done - complex. Hell I expected a Klingon to show up next. A challenge to follow the plot but still, nicely written.
First off Welcome Back
Second I enjoyed the story but then I have 5*ed all of your stories. I wish you a speedy recovery from your health issues.
This reads like a chapter of a much longer story. There is a boatload of stuff that went on prior to this tale and the ending didn’t really tie anything up. I’m a first time reader so I’ll be reading more of your work looking for Carcosa clues. Thank you for sharing your work with us. I look forward to your future submissions.
i felt like I was drugged reading this, massive narrative jumps ignoring all sorts of shit, like at the end
who attacked him, why did no one care, etc, etc, etc
Way too many years since I read Zelazny and never a fan of Lovecraft, so it took a while for me to start making sense of the references. I am sure that there are fans of this, but for me, it was too much effort for what I got out of it and too much of what felt like an insider's clique. I think you have some talent as a writer but this didn't encourage me to read more of your works.