All Comments on 'How to Destroy a Perfect Marriage Ch. 06'

What a lame “ending”!

Made the whole story a complete waste of time.

2*

Any time you dip your pen in the racist bottle, it's a huge fuck up. You did, and maybe you'll live it down, maybe you won't. You get the one star for going there.

... and that's the only thing that marked this whole series down to 1*. A divorce (amicable or acrimonious), counseling leading to reconciliation, opening up their marriage for partner-swapping, jail time for arson or grevious bodily harm, etc. even adopting an emotional-support animal would've been a more thought-out ending. This just fizzled into a spank on the wrist, and left a sour taste in my mouth. Sorry, better luck next time.

Why bother with the journey if it ends in Hoboken? "Let's go home and forget this even happened" is a good takeaway for the reader also.

I didnt hear the characters at all say anything that fits the victim culture you professionally offended twits hang your hats on? feel free to be quiet from now on with the attention whoring ok , I didnt like the story end at all but that crying racism crap where there is none.. well that gets it a 3 from me .

danoctober

I have to say that for most of your tale you had me onboard...but your vague, insipid and rushed ending paragraphs ruined the tale that you had built up prior. The original premise also was a little tired and worn. Wife talks hubby into letting her have strange with apparently nil consequences...well that is a fucked up plot if ever I heard one. And if you read similar stories by other authors touching on this same plot, you learn pretty quickly that the situation never turns out to be a roaring success.

My issue with the ending was not that it seemed a RAAC, it was that it was so fast and didn't show the ending good or bad in detail. You wrote a lot for this series and it's a shame that you didn't take the same time for the aftermath of the situation. A good end can make or break a story.

You set up the big final confrontation, then skipped over the conversation and just ended it! At the beginning of the chapter, Dan says to himself, "Tell her the truth." But then he doesn't!

This chapter turned into Carl and Janet reconciling, but I didn't care about them, the point of the story was Dan and Carrie's marriage. However, the fact that Carl was Janet's ex-husband was a good twist and a perfect way to help mend Dan and Carrie's relationship...

Why didn't Dan say to his wife: "You loved fucking your fantasy man far more than you've ever enjoyed sex with me. It made me realise that you were never that into me and I can't possibly ever compete with the sex you two had together. What future have we got when I know I'm always going to be second best to your three hour fuckfest with a BBC?"

You raised that question and had Dan torture himself over it for 4 chapters, but it's never addressed. Carrie still doesn't even know how deeply hurt and insecure he feels after she emasculated him like that and what specifically is bothering him.

If I wrote this, I wouldn't have even had Carl there. At the point Dan asked the question above to his wife, both Carrie AND Janet could have interrupted and told him that he was a much better lover than Carl. That while Carl could just pound away like an animal, that wasn't making love; what Dan could do in bed was ultimately much more fulfilling. Carrie just needed to say that being fucked like a piece of meat was hot as a one-off, but she felt hollow and ashamed of herself afterwards. Likewise, Janet could tearfully agree that she'd never had anyone make love to her like that before and she would choose Dan over Carl every single time.

Dan needed a massive boost to his ego to get over Carrie demolishing it. Finishing this with a threesome, where both girls are tender and loving with him would have done that. It could have been a "thank you and goodbye" from Janet and a "I'm sorry and I desperately need you" from Carrie. Both girls telling him that he was the best and Carrie putting aside her jealousy to make Dan feel like a god in the bedroom would have been a great way of putting all this behind them.

You set this up nicely with the mother-in-law laying down the law with her daughter: "Her mum had neatly spelled out to Carrie her only job right fucking now was to get Dan back in the house... tonight!" Carrie needed to atone for being a selfish bitch and truly make amends with her husband to repair all the damage that she alone had done to their marriage. They are teetering on the edge of divorce... this story needed a dramatic effort from Carrie to fix things.

sorry ,but this whole story could have been a 5 * NOTHING resolved ! Dan has yet to explain his feelings to Carrie..i think you got tired of your own story and ended it "happily ever after" ....proly not sorry great story plot tho..ty...stlcris

You had some good little twists but I agree with many of the other comments: There was no climatic ending. It finished with a weak whimper.

What damaged this last chapter the most were all the errors in spelling and missing words from sentences plus word duplication and wrong additional words being added in. I had to read, then re-read, many sentences just to make sense of them. You are a better writer than this. Good luck with your next effort. Cheers.

I enjoyed reading the series.

Regardless of your chose of ending, You created the perfect forum for "exchange" & it surprised me that you didn't expand upon or exploit more from the four main characters prospective viewpoint from the dialogue in the hotel room?

Anyway thanks again.

You skipped the part you built this whole story up to.

I was loving how this wreck was unfolding even though the equity was a little convenient, I absolutely love equity or at least some form of balance, then you skipped the conversation that everyone was looking forward to and absolutely needed because of how you built and directed your story.

While I greatly appreciated this installment, it was left very incomplete and had an incredibly disappointing end simply because of thoughts and conversation that was left out.

I do very much appreciate what was here. Do not get me wrong on that point.

I'm not even satisfied with Janet and Carl. You raised good questions about their relationship and glossed over the answers as well.

I can only give this a 3 for simply being incomplete but not for otherwise entertaining content.

I sincerely hope you finish this one far more effectively. I believe the deranged players of this tale and the perverted readers deserve it.

Thank you.

There's an easy way to identify the shittiest writers on the site. They're the ones who employ the "lobotomy RAAC", where nothing is actually resolved, but the writer magically deletes people's memories and emotions in a way that would require a power drill to the temple in the actual world, or in a competent writer's story.

A sudden, unsatisfactory ending. She has no idea what she's done to him. She's quite a selfish cunt. He should make her play his submissive and do whatever he wants to her, instead of worshipping her body. She needs much more payback. She should just be his piece of meat for a while, worshipping HIS body. He needs to take charge of this bitch.

The end did not bring closure to the real problems you put on the table with this story. Why write 5 parts with deep emotions and then everything is "cleared out" in few short paragraphs without any depth?

But what took me down even more were the many mistakes, missing or severely misspelled words. Why don't you involve an editor? Your readers - I assume that others see it like me - are distracted from he flow of the story whenever a homonym is used the wrong way (like "know" instead of "no").

Dan, you have potential - use an editor!

So in the end, Janet and Carl did all the talking? That wasn’t exactly Dan and Carrie hashing out their issues. So they fixed their marriage by NOT communicating... makes about as much sense as fixing a leaky roof with heavy rain.

Then there’s Janet... she went from cutting Carl’s balls off, to sitting on his lap hugging him, in seconds. Hard to understand how her anger just disappeared.

The only plausible part, was Carrie’s mother’s words and actions.

The series was very good, but the ending disappointed me.

d wanted out. Not even a nice big bow.

Besides having to fill missing words and read past misspelled words that might well be the most disappointing and poorly ended multi-chapter stories ever written. Did someone piss you off? This was so fully undone that it had to have been written that way on purpose. I am sorry I read it and even more sorry I reread chapter 5 to refresh my memory.

I truly wish someone else would take this premise, this plot line, and do it the justice it deserves.

I've been waiting for the next chapter, and this was a disappointment. I thought you'd done a good job showing that Dan had committed his own ego's harikari by watching the video (too often), and then you made him instantly whole again by reducing Janet down to a revenge fuck that made Carl feed bad. It felt like it was going toward Dan needing a clean slate and fresh start, and then maybe getting stopped by MIL and his kids would make him choose Carrie, but he went Door #3 and swept all his pain under the rug. The lack of resolution, combined with the weaker-than-usual editing and typos gives the impression this story just needed to get off one's plate.

2 maybe 3*, but i not feel that generous. Again the problem with a RAAC ending or at least with one hinted its the lack of remorse and "redemption" of the cheating spouse/mate. Here Carrie was set in walk away in anger dead set in not allow that Dan sleep with another woman while she looks... I dont say that two wrongs make a rigth, but while we see that she suffers the crisis she doesnt work to save their marriage, the mom its the one who got to slap her into... action?

Again just walk and talk but she doesnt act. So despite of the well written the end was predictable and dull.

You said in chapter 1 "An exercise in writing of a first-time simple flash story in LW's section". A three month long six chapter flash story? Hate to be at your house when a storm comes and the lightning flashes, bet it lights the sky for days.

good that came out of this is, both partners should have asked themselves 'what do I really want?', and the honest answer would've a reunion. They would have been too miserable without each other. At least in a flimsy way, Carrie has some justification; she got his permission.

she should dump him pronto, he had the chance to say no, fuck him! or better still don't, find someone who can fuck.

No but I stayed at a Holiday Inn once. To all of you complaining about the end go back and reread it. Dan and Carrie had problems and as the final passage stated, 'It's time to move on and start something new. As far as I am concerned, we lived happily ever after'.

If I understand what an RAAC is, this story didn't fit the criteria. Other than money spent on the final room and drinks there was no monetary costs. Dan didn't give Carrie free reign to fuck every swing dick out there and Carrie didn't agree to let Dan dip his wick in every vat of wax to please him.

As far as Dan and Carl are concerned they both inflected the worst kind of pain you can get on each other, the thought that your spouse might like sex from someone else. The same could be said for Carrie and Janet. Janet was a hairs breath away from wanting Dan forever.

Where there error's in writing in the story, yes but the quality of the story overshowded those. For your effort if for nothing else I give you a five.

This is a perfect textbook example of a author who cannot write a story or least come to conclusion to his own story. This us kind of an has interesting plot and shows that the husband has been crushed and emasculated and humiliated by one's wife did.

Yet in the final chapter there's almost no conversation at all between what the wife did and how the husband is feeling or reacted to it. Almost no compensation of any kind.

This is completely on the fault of the author who doesn't seem to understand that the purpose or reason for conflict in the story is to resolve it in some manner or another. Simply pretending the conflict doesn't exist or pretending that it has been solved is not a satisfactory way of ending a story this convoluted and this complex.

Just a awful stupid terrible ending

What sort of an ending was this? A 'I got tired of my own story lets get rid of it?'

You didn't have to continue the story, It could have ended sooner and leave the end open. Any erotic story is about life and fantasies, and at least in life the future is uncertain. Deep down we only control the present. Arthur Conan Doyle got also tired of his brilliant creation Sherlock Holmes and ended killing him wanting to write about something else. Don't do that in the future. Leave the end open and if somebody wants an end to it, they can imagine their own one. Any way the initial premise of the story was interesting and shows nobody really can predict the consequences of actions. Thanks for the story.

Is that a proves conclusively how twisted and evil and destructive the wife's actions were.

The other guy Carl is a pussie hound who is trying to reform and work and save his marriage. If I read the story correctly human circulated from his wife and kids were quite a while and wants them back. Moreover Carrie came on to him in a lied about the husband being ok with what she wanted to do.

Janet had deep concerns over the mental state of her friend Dan. Moreover she did not specifically go out of her way to humiliate Carl with video That she and Danny made. That video was to show Carrie how much pain and suffering her husband Danny was going to. It was not directed at Carl.

Danny remains a shower stupid and pathetic loser who should have walked out of the marriage back and chapter one

All of this will create an caused by Kerry. A matter how hard daddy tried he could not become a large black man with a huge cock. He was her obsession her fantasy much what sure the marriage and none of that is ever talked about in this ending.

Suppose they actually reconcile and then at some point down the road 3 months from now 6 months from now...etc... Carrie is in the mood and wants to have sex with her husband again. How is Danny suppose to operate with this hanging over his head and her sexual fantasy obsession never talked about or resolve???

And they really really want it to be great. But they have just one little problem. They don't have all the talent and intellect and resources to build a complete whole air-worthy plane. But they really really want to build a jet, and they told a lot of people they are building a jet, and they put every bit of talent and energy and resources they had available into building the jet.

And they end up with something that looks like a jet, sounds like a jet, it even takes off and flies like a jet, kinda. One more little problem. They forgot about where the jet would fly to, and how it was going to land. So they ended up flying the jet around in circles until it ran out of gas, then it crashed.

They should have started by building something they actually had the talent and resources to complete. Now the jet is a wreck, and they just look foolish.

Ambition is nice, but just takes a dream. Success is hard, and takes a lot of time and effort and hard work, and talent.

I'm not sure what you are capable of, but this story crashed and burned. Its obvious you tried to make it up as you went along, and I would say that was a poor idea.

A great plot idea, with all the best subplots and suspense and drama totally ignored or blown. So Carrie knew and socialized with Carl for two years, before she fucked him, finally. I'm sure during that 2 years she never had carnal thoughts about Carl, until she watched a BBC video. Right. I'm sure over that two years Dan never asked Carrie about her trips to the playland, what she did, who she talked to, who the kids played with. I'm sure the kids never mentioned their new friends they played with at the playland, for 2 years. It all just somehow never came up in their day to day close intimate harmonious marriage, for 2 years.

I wondered why you glossed over just how Carrie went about finding a black cock god to fuck, in two days, without any questions or input from Dan about who this guy was, how Carrie found him, how did she know he was safe and clean, and had a big cock. How did Carrie know Carl had a big cock before the night she fucked him? Guess that was just luck. Right.

And Dan is OK now, because Carl is angry with Dan that Dan fucked his wife Janet so good. Just one other little problem. Carl is still the best fuck Carrie has ever had, and a much better fuck than she has ever gotten from Dan, or ever will. And Dan will know that, every time he tries to pleasure Carrie, and compares the contrite scared Carrie's faked orgasms with the mind blowing heart stopping orgasms she had with Carl, the first time she ever fucked him, supposedly. Hey, he can watch the replays anytime he wants. Yeah, this marriage is definitely happily ever after. Like the jet.

Hope you can make something out of the wreckage, at least learn something from your mistakes. I suggest you work a little harder and a little smarter on your next creation. Sad, this could have been really good.

P.S. How many times had Carrie seen Carl after she fucked him, and what did they talk about, at playland. Guess Dan won't bother to ask her that, or ask to see the texts and messages they shared on her cell phone, before and after she fucked him. Happily ever after. Right.

With all the misspelling, typos, and after looking at posting dates it feels like the author rushed through the ending. Nothing really seems resolved in either of these marriages with this ending; it gives more of a picture if further and bigger problems down the road. The two couples continuing on like this without serious therapy and real resolution are headed for further and bigger issues. After all the angst portrayed in previous chapters to ignore everything that they've gone through would be like ignoring a crumbling/failing foundation of a house; eventually the house will come down.

The only thing that would make sense of such an ending, on Dan and Janet's parts; is if they plan on continuing to have a romantic relationship behind their spouses backs.

With this ending it just brings into picture that there is the two failed marriages, not just one.

And, really makes one question the Carl character even more; feels more like the false promises of a serial cheater.

I agree with all of the comments regarding the technical writing problems and the failed plotting in this installment. But at a deeper level this piece as a whole reflects what is worst about LW in general - authors seem to believe that in order create dramatic tension they have to create weak male characters. While there is a very tiny percentage of men who are submissive (effectively allowing marriages to be run by their wives) or cucks, outside of the audience here they are exceptionally rare. In this story Dan October could have created a powerful, psychologically interesting story if when Carrie said she wanted to fuck a black man (or any other man for that matter) Dan had simply told Carrie that since she thought her wedding vows didn't matter he was leaving and she could have gangbangs for all he cared, or some variation on that. Instead, we get a wimpy husband who goes along with it and then blubbers endlessly about it afterward. We see this again and again - as in the absurd story in which the wife goes out and fucks 38 men in a clinical study for "science", the many stories in which the wife announces she's "going on a date" and the husband fails to take action immediately, etc. Someone commented about that the story is racist, and someone else couldn't see it. Whether it's racist or not is for others to determine, but "Carl" does fit a fetish stereotype that also infests LW and is a very weak plot device - the tall, hugely hung, incredibly potent, and amazingly skilled black man. For authors, here are a few facts: height doesn't correlate with cock size; black cocks on average are no larger or smaller than white cocks; blacks suffer from diabetes, obesity, and heart disease at far higher rates than whites (all of these impair sexual performance). Yet, we get a steady diet of cuck/wimp fantasy in which black men are portrayed as almost animalistic (this was common among Southern racists generations ago). If someone had the knowledge and talent to write realistically about black men and blacks in general in LW, I think most readers would find the stories far more interesting than most of this dreck.

as I think it was written tongue-in-cheek to reflect your feelings re the poor editing that was done. The mispelled words, dropped words, inserting wrong name etc. Nicely done, that was funny.

If your comment was not sarcastic wit, then you have some editing you need to do.

I though it was entertaining story, I read all chapters but agree with the others the ending was not satisfactory.

I really enjoyed this story series. A lot of thoughtful dialog. But, the ending seemed like the author had to get the kids to soccer practice! It’s probably because I liked the story so much that the ending was disappointing.

"What sort of an ending was this? A 'I got tired of my own story lets get rid of it?' "

Too bad about that...you 'had me,' right up to the denouement.

A few constructive criticisms: Dan, you write a compelling narrative; character development is better than most on this site; you create and use tension to build suspense; and you seem to both craft, and follow, a well-developed story line. On the other hand, you really could use a rigorous editor (and/or a few remedial grammar lessons).

Used to check every day for it and then when it finally came and I saw the really low ratings, it kind of killed my hype for it. I enjoyed the story, but the ending wasn't really what I expected. I thought after a couple months we would get some closure.

It seems like nothing changed for Dan. He might stay together for the kids, but he's not really in it. He will mostly likely try to keep the marriage open, at least for him.

Did gloss over it and miss it? was there a criticism of the ending by a quality writer of stories on LW?

Get some Dragoonman72

I hate to admit it, but I also enjoyed Harry's comment. I've read his comments going back more than ten years, and the old boy ain't illiterate. He's not very nice, but he does write well. I also agree with Annonymous "no sale". He pretty much said it all. As one who had followed this series, I had hoped for a definitive ending. We didn't get it.

Unless you're a fat ugly useless middel aged racist White Loser dont bother reading. Useless totally useless! Only appeals to members of that useless ilk! Fuck them and the orange horse they rode in on!

Well your getting your lumps on this one. lol. The jury has spoken. Here's the problem. This so called ending sucks. Big time. Great, after 6 chapters you pulled all the characters together and we even found out who was fucking who. But how did Dan and Carrie continue on? This is not a particular bad chapter, it just sucks as a final chapter.

Sort of a 'dollar store' ending. Should have been a better ending.

A very strange ending to an enjoyable, well written story.

Nonetheless, thanks for the read.

How about fixing this ending....please. or perhaps FTDS could/would.

I enjoyed how you kept raising the stakes, up to and including in this chapter. Finding out that the wife saw the lover socially for months leading up to the event, and probably afterwards, seems like that would be *huge*.

... and then the story just kind of stopped, with all of those issues unresolved. Felt like you had either wrote yourself into a corner or just got bored, so, eh, let's just say it works out, somehow, the end.

I know the English flunkees and polyamorous cretins will cheer, but you really NED an editor, not spell correct or whatever lame-assed program you are using to finish your writing for you.

The mistakes are as simple as you being too lazy to read your own work. The second grader who tried to make sense of it on first pass and got lost is ahead of the game intellectually. The grammar is horrendous. The lack of proper punctuation only compounded the possibilities of what might be hinted at in your sentences.

I haven't even come close to covering the morality of your "topic". I think it would be senseless until you learn to use to use words properly.

When you have such a difficult task to wrap up some conflicting events, it is hard. You did well, though, for me, I wish you had addressed the plot threads you created. such as, Dan's feeling of inadequacy compared to Carl. You made a brief mention of Janet's comments, but what did Dan hear and think about them?

Jumped the shark with the revelation that Carl was Janet's ex. So much for soothing Dan's ego and convincing him another woman would want him if his wife doesn't. He was essentially just a revenge fuck for Janet. I had to stop reading when Carl showed up to pick up Janet. Judging by the comments, I missed a lazy, magic wand RAAC for both couples.

If you hired someone to finish the story for you, as it seems, you need to get your money back. You were robbed, my friend. As we were robbed of a good ending to an interesting story.

Thanks for the story. Don't give up on writing. You have potential. Consider this a learning experience in what not to do. We're none of us perfect.

Cog

Just because you ticked the BTB crowd off so nicely!

It was pretty bloody obvious who Carl was as soon as Janet started questioning Janet and it answered a question I had - where did Carrie get her bit of spare? A bit too bloody convenient though and if Janet was so pissed off at him, why would she call Carl to give her a lift other than maybe to drive a wedge further between her and him and Dan and Carrie. Why then the quick collapse back into Carl's arms, after all he just proved he was happy to screw a married woman while obviously pining for and planning to try and reconcile with Janet. So that part was a dud for me.

Tip toed around Carrie's mum's fling again to no real purpose, it wasn't used as a warning to Carrie or an inspiration for Dan. Another dud.

Dan's big thing through the 5 chapters has been how much better Carl had been than him and to prove he was right when Dan walked in the room, he did nothing, when he said Carrie must be missing out on something he did nothing, when he got pissed at Dan for fucking Janet, Dan did nothing. On any of these, unless the man was totally destroyed, which I don't believe he was given his actions with Janet, someone in Dan's shoes would have been at the throat of Carl. Again a dud.

On a similar theme, Dan's emasculation has been such a big thing and this was never really addressed, at least in the body of the text. Given how big it has been, it is one of the things that really needed resolving for the reader, even if it was they agreed to counselling to resolve it. As I read it and I think others too, Dan went home with that impression still deeply seated in him and no retraction of his vow never to have sex with her again. A big dud given the focus through the series.

"What I do know is we need to take a break from all this nonsense and not talk about it anymore." This is just such bullshit, the last thing that will save the marriage is to not talk about this anymore, unless of course every final thing was thrashed out in the hotel that day, including resolving Dan's obvious depression. No talking = either then end of the marriage or Dan's suicide or both.

It really wouldn't have hurt to have done an epilogue, a year later everything was hunky dory, because....

Finally, really REALLY, get at the very least, a proof reader. Some of that became so hard to read, it was only that I had got this far I worked myself through it. Though people are probably thinking that may not be such a good thing :)

I enjoyed this entire story, but really don't get the ending. What really has changed for Dan? How does this change the fact that he feels he can't compete with Carl? Or that his wife apparently enjoyed sex with Carl more than him. These doubts are ingrained in his mind. They may try for a while, but I can't see them living happily ever after. The ending seemed sort of rushed. I think you should drop the last few sentences and write a continuation of how they try to really put their narraige back together and deal with their elephants in the room

You are in serious NEED of an editor! You can't claim copying and pasting in the portal changes what YOU have written like you did in a comment. Words missing in a sentence can change the whole meaning and make the reader not want to continue. Your constant use of your when it should be you're is really irritating as well as the repetitiveness. The continual woe is me paragraphs that filled each chapter, saying the same thing dragged this out 3 chapters longer than it should have been considering the piss poor ending.

Too much early focus on the wife's Mom on this installment. Explains Mom...but who care about Mom? Besides, Mom's past situation is not really a similar kettle of smelly fish.

Didn't like the final showdown, series of coincidences, or outcome. Somehow, Dan's cool now because Carl hurts too and he is tired of talking about it. His world is in balance, water under the bridge, now let's go watch movies and eat pizza.

This installment 2 stars. The series: 3 3/4 stars.

Before you attempt ANYTHING else find an editor! Learn to proof read. Check for typos.

You cannot possibly produce any story worth reading until you learn the basics of written English. You are the absolute worst that I has read here! Even including the non-native English speakers.

anonjerry

It is so frustrating when authors forget to deal with the source of the angst in a story!! How did they deal with Dan's self loathing and feeling of not being enough? Carrie never heard his pain and hurt. It was glossed over again like so many authors do.

It was a great story, but the Dan never said what he needed to say. Everyone was honest but him.

Nearly unreadable! Possibly the worst I have seen on this site including stories by non-English speakers.

This one went off the rails because of your lack of an editor. The incomplete sentences, improper English grammar, and lack of necessary punctuation made reading nearly impossible. Sorry, I usually like your work.

Janet started to rebuild it, then what does she do? Knowing full well how Dan was feeling she not only invites the source of this pain to the hotel, she shows affection, sits on his lap and finally leaves with him.

In Dan's head this would only confirm that Carl is the better man, irrespective of what is said. Really surprised that Dan made no attempt to beat the living shit out of Carl the second he came in, but then what chance would he have against the better man.

They're, their, there

Worse and worst...

Seriously. If you did not have it in you to finish the story coherently, why not a quick note saying that you could not mange it. Apologize. Move on.

That would have been WAY better than the mess you provided. 1*

This looks like it was the very first draft, with predictive text kicking in here and there, illogically replacing nouns, adverbs and possessive pronouns in annoyingly random fashion, with missing prepositions and nouns, all confusing the actual meaning of a large number of sentences.

So much has been left out. Carrie has one hand resting on Dan's car speaking with Janet for as long as Dan is queuing to book into the hotel, walk outside and hold a long conversation with Mom-in-law, but only the latter (and far less interesting) conversation is recorded for readers to feast on.

This confrontation takes place shortly after 9am (say within half an hour) between the time Carrie rings Dan's office to find he has taken a day off to visit his doctor, and she spots him in the front of the hotel where he's booking a room. Allowing another hour for the rest of the episode to play out in the hotel room, waiting for room service drinks that must be delivered on the backs of a bale of turtles, the next thing we know, it's 5pm and Janet's kids have to be picked up while Carrie's kids must be bloated on their all-day breakfasts with a Granny who's gone doolally in the hotel restaurant.

Janet should still be hung up on Carl who is still pussy hounding only a week before he tries to inveigle his way back into his family, yet she succumbs to his charms once more with him after say not much more than that Carrie politely asked him to stick his dick in her for a night of lust. Really? Now, if in tears of regret he had sworn to Janet that he had been so devastated by the loss of his marriage that he had never had any relationships in past 2 years, and was only persuaded to "help" his long-term platonic friend out to save her marriage, then Janet's reaction might have been more believable and resolved by 11am at the latest. Even so, Janet has already said that Carl has little chance of getting back in her pants because his big cock can't match the love that Dan can give her So, what were they doing for the next 6 hours? If they were enjoying an orgy, then we readers want to know ALL about it!

As for Dan. He may still love Carrie but he knows ... absolutely knows ... that Carrie was blown away by Carl in the best sex she'd had. There is no way that he would meekly return to Carrie with his limp dick between his legs.

Carrie may want Dan back at any cost, but she is the wanton hussy that kicked this off and batting on a swampy wicket.

The logical outcome is that Carrie and Carl leave together, while Dan and Janet use the room for the rest of the afternoon (with or without room service) and the next day Dan files for divorce.

That's it? That's how you finished it? "They lived happily ever after"? If Literotica had a category for the worse story ending of the '2019' year, this would win hands down. No one can top how you crashed this story with a rushed ending. You killed the whole story in the last couple of chapters on the last fucking page. Boo!

I followed this story for a year on and off. I enjoyed it and found mildly entertaining. It was all over the place, but it was a fun read. Sometimes I felt the comments after each chapter were a bit over the top with the criticism. I agreed to disagree. But danoctober, you deserve the shit your getting now for chapter 6. That chapter itself was okay, but I agree with everyone who hates this ending. There was no ending here. From the comments I read, I have no problem with including Carrie's mom or including Janet and her husband like some other commenters, but this story was about Dan and Carrie resolving this. That Janet stuff was 'only' a part of the story, a chapter, not the ending. Do the right thing and add something more. Do an epilogue or something. Not for the people that hate this story, but for the people who followed it. As a reader, I can say honestly there is no real ending here. Don't let this be the end. Maybe someone else can finish it. If you are not going to finish it, give permission for others to finish it. This could have be a good loving wives story. You killed it with the ending. Sorry, but that's the truth.

I feel like the character Dan in this story who was fucked over by his BBC loving wife. It's like you just wanted to clear your desktop for the weekend and shoved everything in the trash. 6 chapters of detail and then nothing. The whole story was on the verge of intense until the last couple of chapters at the end. So what happened? Run out of steam? That danoctober is a total dickhead move. This is a terrible ending. Wish I could give you a lower score. 1 star for wasting my time.

Janet leaves with her husband, but author earlier writes, "She still loved her ex-husband. As for sex, Dan all she needed." Did the ever get together again?

Until toward the bottom of the 2nd page. I could see by your typing that you were getting excited in the sense that you were writing out a stream of consciousness. Almost frantic....maybe how you lived it yourself, IDK. I'm really sorry for you if that is the case. In a way, it felt like not quite peaking and not quite cumming, nothing resolved, not feeling satisfied and unsure what to do or how to do it. Perhaps in time and reflection you may be able re-write an ending that will satisfy both your readers and yourself. My unsolicited thoughts.

Wonderful effort. Keep it up. Thanks for the read!

I didn't find it as unsatisfying as others. Dan got over it because he rocked Janet's world. Carl had to deal with the same insecurities that Dan had. I also would have like a longer exploration, but I see what you were trying to do here.

Dan and Carrie never really have the candid conversation towards which they’ve been working. Without that clearing the air and the resultant blueprint to move forward, the ending feels rushed and incomplete.

The reason the ending worked was because most of the problem was in Dan's head. With the meeting with Carl and Janet Dan realizes that Carl wasn't this mythical character he made him out to be. He kept imagining that he had never satisfied Carrie in their whole marriage. She must have faked it with him. Then he sees Janet, Carl's wife of many years, tell Dan that she totally satisfied him and wanted him sexually again. Seeing Carl feeling vulnerable made Dan see things from a different perspective. Most of it was in Dan's head and that typically is the reality when the spouse cheats. Was I not good enough. Did they like that other person better. Was he better endowed, was she sexier. So to me that ending worked perfectly because it brought the conversation going on in Dan's head out into the open and he realized the other guy had the same issues, same concerns, same weaknesses.

The writing could have been better, but the angle of the story bringing things together was really good. And the story wasn't left unresolved. They were committed to making it work, but it's going to be a long road for them to get back on track. The story ends with them getting on the right road again. We don't need to be told of every curve, every setback, every stall along the way.

I hated that first chapter, because Dan seemed like one of those people that set up their loved ones for failure so he had a reason to feel sorry for himself, to be mad at them, to have someone to blame. His wife comes to him with her fantasy, and I believe her when she says that all he needed to say no and explain why not. Now if he said no and she did it anyway, then that is the test. But a couple should be able to come to each other with their fantasies, with crazy dreams (like I want to leave my secure job and start my own business) and at least have the other spouse hear it out agnostically. The other spouse should be open to trying it out, except when it would be something that would really bother them, like this was for Dan. Then they need to speak the fuck up and tell the other spouse. Not set them up for failure like little whiny loser bitches that Dan acted like who want others to let him down so he can go feel sorry for himself.

Another writer could finish this story. I could write my own ending. But I don't want to read my ending. I want to read your ending. You said after the first chapter this was a 'first time writing exercise in LW's', so take ownership of this story and finish your exercise with a proper ending.

I have to admit that it seems imṕossible to find a true resolution to the situation. In fact I felt that the best thing would be to exchange hubbies. But I doubt that Carl would accept that idea.

A couple of notes to commenters . . .

1 - Carrie did NOT cheat. She had Dan's permission, and he even went along with her. He did not express his reservations, and that's really on him more than her. That being said, she was so excited that she was indeed somewhat insensitive to the possibility he might not really be on board. But I thought his after-the-fact excuse for not speaking out and being insistent was pretty lame.

2 - Dan DID cheat. Even if they didn't carry through with sex, what he was going to do was being done behind Carrie's back, without her knowledge, way beyond what she had agreed to. That's cheating.

3 - Since Janet and Carl were separated . . . neither was cheating, unless you look at the request to try and get back together as binding from the moment said . . . though you could call Janet's willingness to be with Dan behind Carrie's back as sort of cheating.

Dan -- Cheater

Carl -- Maybe a Cheater

Jenny -- Maybe a Cheater

Carrie -- Not a Cheater . . . the only one who played by the rules THAT THEY SET UP (not what we want, but who they are). Carrie was the only faithful spouse there.

Sorry, you may not like it but that's the rules as set up here.

This is not a RAAC story. They all went through a ton of stuff to get back together. Both couples were appropriately separated for a period, and Dan saw things as a new beginning, (and it's doubtful Carrie will be insensitive in the future).

Now it wasn't perfectly clear that Dan dealt with his insecurities, but the ending hints at that.

Those wanting to burn Carrie somehow . . . Why? Why do you side with the cheaters against the only one who didn't cheat?

Good story . . . a bit manipulative in that it was told in such a way as to provoke ire TOWARDS THE WRONG TARGET by some readers who claim to hate cheating, but manage to reverse in their minds who's actually guilty of cheating (as written anyway -- really telling us much more about those readers). Very, very well done!!!

I recommend you reread the first chapter. This story isn't about cheating, it's about how Carrie destroyed her marriage by crushing her husband's ego.

She started fantasising about getting fucked by a black guy and going totally crazy for him as she cuckolded her husband... which is exactly what happened. Carrie knew that Dan would let her have whatever fantasy she liked, because she ALWAYS got her way. They both say this in the first chapter.

"Dan never denied me anything and knew how crazy I could be."

"How could I refuse you? You knew I wouldn't."

She abused his devotion to her to indulge in a very harmful fantasy, which totally fucked up their marriage. They were watching porn together when she asked him to let her screw another guy for real, at which point her husband immediately lost his erection, they had a brief chat, then he went to bed alone. You'd have to be the densest person alive (or totally self-obsessed like Carrie) to not realise your partner hated the idea if they reacted like that!

Carrie was a selfish cunt and the vast majority of this clusterfuck is her fault.

However, Dan isn't blameless in this mess. Dan was way too passive in that relationship and should have told her to forget her fantasy because it was never going to happen. If she ever fucked another guy, their marriage would be over. But that's not the character of the husband in this story. Carrie was the dominant partner in their relationship and she steamrolled her adoring husband into letting her get her way again... to disastrous consequences.

After Carrie turned into a cock-crazy slut for another man, she crushed her husband's self-esteem... She had fucked Dan up so badly, that he was no longer able to have sex with his wife, because he was now a mess of insecurities. Dan giving up on Carrie and intending to start an affair with Janet was just a consequence of him no longer being able to get it up for his wife.

I found the ending to this story disappointing (after such a promising start!), because Carrie never really properly addresses Dan's shattered ego. Janet making love to Dan gave him a bit of confidence back, but he was still absolutely convinced that Carrie much preferred fucking Carl to him... and despite that being the main reason for their marital difficulties, it was never resolved.

And a pitch that didn’t make it to the plate. I know that the author is a better story teller than shown here. This story is incomplete, for instance, how does Dan regain his confidence in his intimate relationship with Carrie?

I believe I understood your points, but I think you may have missed part of mine, and I do have some slight disagreements.

First, parts of my letter were intended to counter claims by OTHER readers that Carrie cheated. Yes, I share your viewpoint that it was not about cheating, but for those who saw it as being about a sort of cheating, I was pointing out that technically, they had the wrong target if saying Carrie was the cheater.

And yes, I read she knew her husband 'wouldn't refuse her anything', but that means within reason. If she'd told him, "It's my fantasy to club a child to death and have you film it.", we can be pretty sure he'd say, "No!"

With a statement like the above, it becomes incumbent upon the person who will be offended to set the boundaries, and when necessary, say that it's more than they can handle, and may destroy the relationship. (Note that she also thought HE'D enjoy it, and it would expand their sexual horizons.) Now in retrospect, she thought that was 'stupid', but hindsight is 20/20. She WAS selfish and somewhat insensitive, but I still put a share of the blame on him.

Look at it another way . . . the author wrote about a scenario that many men would find offensive. Suppose we modify the fantasy only. They enjoy exploring their sexuality (just like in the story). Her fantasy was that she wanted to have a threesome, her, another very attractive woman, and Dan . . . the three of them really going at it. Now perhaps Dan is really put off by this, in fact just as put off as he was by the original scenario in the story, but he goes along with it and does NOT strongly object or refuse. Other than the fantasy itself, the rest plays out as it did in the original story. Do we still think of her as abusing Dan and being totally selfish, or would we be more likely to say, "Geez, Dan you should have said something . . . she thought you'd enjoy this, a number of guys would.". I'd concede that far fewer would enjoy the actual fantasy in the story . . . but regardless of whether any given person would like it or not, if a suggestion totally repulses a person, as hers did him, he really should have made it just as clear as he would if she'd asked him to kill someone. (Use your words, Dan.)

Also, minor, but a point of word use . . . there are two definitions for cuckold. The traditional (and more accurate) requires that the wife have sex with someone else WITHOUT HER HUSBAND'S knowledge. That was NOT the case. He knew, and to some extent, gave reluctant permission. The more recent (and a bit more colloquial) is when a husband is aroused by feelings of humiliation associated with his wife sleeping with another man. This also was NOT the case. He obviously was NOT excited about it - so in no way did she cuckold him, though he did almost make her a cuckquean. We have tended to corrupt both definitions in the U.S., but I think we can communicate the situations and feelings more accurately (especially in LW) if we use the term appropriately.

I'd sort of hoped that would happen too . . . But I think the author wrote Dan as the type who simply tends to hit a 'Reset' button on relationships, rather than being straight-forward about working through his associated emotions. I guess that can work too. In this story, it's written as though it did. After the four of them talk . . . he just sort of 'resets' . . . it makes for an interesting character. Though it might seem to fly in the face of what we CURRENTLY consider psychologically healthy and complete . . . maybe it simply works better for this character. Again, this is another slightly different way of looking at a person that I really enjoyed. More good work from danoctober!!

Yeah, fair enough. From a strictly "who was cheating" point of view, I can't find any fault with your analysis. I also agree wholeheartedly that Dan wasn't blameless. He definitely should have told Carrie how much he hated the idea, but the guy was very passive and always indulged every fantasy she had ever had.

Where I disagree was the threesome analogy. Carrie fucking a black guy was all her fantasy and obsession. Dan wasn't even an active participant in the sex... she expected him to just stand there like a gimp and video her getting fucked senseless for three hours. Carrie didn't suggest it for Dan's benefit, this was all to do with her getting massively turned on by watching interracial cuckold porn.

Using your example of a threesome, this is the way Carrie broached it:

You're watching threesome porn with your wife. She's into it and getting turned on, then you suggest actually looking for a hot girl to join you for a fuckfest with you as the star. Your wife goes a bit quiet, answers you with a few clipped replies and reluctantly agrees, then says she's tired and goes to bed alone.

Instead of realising she's upset and that you've badly misjudged the situation, you spend the next hour spanking it to threesome porn, getting yourself off twice before going to bed. You then believe that the previous nights discussion was a resounding success and arrange a threesome. What could possibly go wrong?

That's the level of blind self-delusion that Carrie exhibited when she got this rolling. She was so obsessed with cucking her husband and riding a BBC, that she totally ignored the extremely obvious signs that Dan wasn't into this... at all. The fact he lost his boner the instant she mentioned it was a huge red flag, but the selfish slut didn't really give a fuck about her husband.

The reason I don't think Dan could just get over it, was because the last 5 chapters were all about him torturing himself with feelings of inadequacy. He had convinced himself that Carrie would never be satisfied with him in bed again, but she never does say anything to change his mind. He gave himself PTSD watching the video of her getting balled over and over again... you don't get over that with a quick chat.

Sorry, not buying the analysis. Carrie cheated... probably.

By which I mean: The author dropped a large bombshell in the last chapter, informing us that Carrie's fantasies about getting fucked by a black man with a large cock just happened to coincide with her becoming friends with a black man with a large cock, and then never followed up on that.

We can, however, draw some pretty reasonable conclusions that what Dan saw was just the culmination of a months-long emotional (and probably somewhat physical) affair that, even if it didn't cross the line completely with full sex.

Because the guy himself was kind of irrelevant to the central "Carrie crushed Dan pyschologically" storyline, where he came from was also kind of irrelevant. I'd just assume she posted a Craiglist ad and he's a random guy from the Internet willing to have sex with a random woman from the Internet.

But now we know that that wasn't the case, there's a whole backstory we can fill in, a dance of conversations and flirtations and God-knows-how-much sexual touching, leading up to that night, and enhancing the whole fantasy haze she describes she was living in during that period.

The story doesn't come right out and say she cheated, and it's likely she waited until that night for full sex, but I have a very hard believing that she didn't cross a lot of lines before then.

If this were a story with human beings in it, there'd be some obvious questions now from Dan about how exactly she got Carl up to that room, what had happened between them before, and how much contact she had with him after that night. This, unfortunately, is not that story.

Once again, danoctober, I enjoyed this story and the ending. It made me think, and during the course of the story I'd find myself switching sides and re-apportioning responsibility for the situations. Good stuff !!

Powersworder, you make many good points here.

" . . . . but the guy was very passive and always indulged every fantasy she had ever had."

Yeh, he really was . . . that aspect of his personality made it difficult for me to take his side, (and drove me a bit crazy at certain points in the tale).

However, as to characterizing my example of a threesome being inclusive, whereas as having Dan watch and film as leaving him out . . . once again, I think that is seeing things from our biases. That second definition of 'cuckold' that I relayed earlier - As much as that idea of humiliation is in contradiction to the core of my being, there are a small number of people who get into that. Now Dan wasn't one of them, but he was not completely clear to Carrie on that (regardless of how obvious it might seem to many of us).

So again, her main faults as I see them were her selfishness and insensitivity, and perhaps allowing herself to believe that maybe Dan would enjoy her fantasy scenario on some level. His were (to sum it up) his refusal to communicate his true feelings. This coupled with his (unnecessary) insecurities, was a recipe for disaster.

In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with being wildly sexually experimental, as long as all boundaries are clear. You can suggest anything you want, but when partners choose the experimental approach, they must be crystal clear with each other about where they stand, and must be sensitive to each other's feelings.

That's why I didn't take her particular fantasy as being that important, it was more of a misdirection of sorts, when it came to what was TRULY important. I don't care if the objection is as innocuous as 'You can do whatever you want . . . just always keep your elbow covered, I'll be highly offended if someone else touches your bare elbow.'. If that is a genuine, clearly voiced objection, then it has to be seen as a serious boundary never to be crossed. However, without the clear objection, indeed with reluctant acquiescence, there is bound to be confusion and misunderstanding, even if the person objecting had sort of hinted that baring an elbow might be somewhat of a problem, how's the (albeit somewhat insensitive) partner to know just what or how serious?

So with that in mind, I see the true enemy here as their lack of communication, coupled with a lifestyle they were not adequately prepared for. High levels of sexual exploration often involve fantasies. One can not be insensitive or selfish when it comes to a fantasy one wants, and one can not be submissive (or really even passive-aggressive) if it's something that one really does NOT want. The other agreement most successful explorers make, is after some such fantasy is over, it is again discussed briefly. If participants all love it. It can be done again. If one of both hated it. It's over, you LEAVE IT BEHIND, forever. This is the (somewhat surprising) path danoctober took for Dan in this tale. Dan may simply be incapable of analyzing and/or expressing his insecurities and conflict avoidance. He hated the fantasy, and it took a while, but his eventual solution . . . LEAVE IT BEHIND. Carrie, on the other hand, probably took the other route . . . over-analyzed it, and took on ALL (rather than only her share) of the responsibility and associated guilt for the situation.

The good of that - They got back together, each resolving things in their own ways, and becoming better communicators.

The bad (maybe) - They may be better communicators than they were, but they'll probably never be really good communicators. They'll probably miss out on things both might have enjoyed because Carrie will be afraid to suggest anything out of the ordinary, simply out of fear of the potential outcome, and Dan's suppression of true feelings will continue to feed those fears. They may live happily ever after, but they'll never be the explorers they once were, and this will probably apply to other areas of their lives besides sex. Maybe that's okay though.

Again, danoctober, I think this is better work than many here have given you credit for.

I do not not agree with the assumption she cheated before hand, which would ruin a rather unique take, and in many ways contradict the title. I certainly hope that was not the case.

For this story, I'm happy to assume what's written, rather that create scenarios that I think would betray this interesting conflict. I'm biased in part, I'll admit, because it makes it a more unique and (in my opinion) much better story if taken as written. Trying to stretch it so that it goes back into a 'wife-cheats,-cuckold-husband-wimps-out-and-takes-her-back' type of story.

If she'd been cheating, there would have been no fantasy (other than her being filmed part). So the ONLY fantasy was that he would film it, and the other part wasn't fantasy, because she was already doing it? I just don't see that as fitting the scenario provided It as makes more sense that subconsciously perhaps, the READER wants to see her as cheating, conniving, and evil . . . which fits a simpler, easier-to-feel-self-righteous personal narrative for the reader, rather than her actually being that way.

As written, they enjoy porn together, seemingly enjoying sexual exploration. They are different, but are in love with and happy with one another and their lives together. (If she was cheating, they wouldn't really have had a 'perfect' marriage. Cheating also would have been a form of lying, which would also ruin that initial premise.

Now, what personal character flaws could 'destroy a perfect marriage'. The flaws, as I see them, are primarily not the sexual proclivities of either, but more:

Her - Truthful to a fault (that is, even when she should be guaging reactions) - Insensitivity - assumption that her here-to-fore perfect partner's needs will match hers.

Him - Acquiescent to a fault (that is, even when he should be voicing objections)- Insecurity - assumption that his here-to-fore perfect partner's understanding of a given situation will match his.

Such assumptions bring them into conflict when her fantasy not only does not match his. He actually hates it, but is unwilling (or unable) to tell her. So the otherwise perfect pairing comes apart, and both lack the tools to save it (or it seemed).

Previous cheating on her part would essentially destroy this construct (and the meaning in the title itself). Plus it would render it just another, typical cheating and/or (humiliation) cuckold story.

As laid out, the story gives us many of the visceral feelings of the more typical stories (betrayal, anger, regret, desire for revenge, hypocrisy, and the most important - self-righteous indignation). It gives us all those, when as written, there is no need for any of them. As a result, we fill-in the needs for those feelings that meet the underlying criteria based on our biases.

This doesn't mean that your assumptions (or anyone else's) are necessarily wrong, just that a really interesting story becomes mundane if they are applied here. -- How to Destroy a Perfect Story. (Well, not 'perfect', but pretty decent).

I also liked how Dan's resolution messed with my perception and bias that all insecurities must necessarily be dealt with and resolved.

5 stars for effort. There should have been another chapter or 2. This story started one way then ended up another. Sort of role reversal for the husband and wife. That was the interesting twist to this situation which made it different. Not sure if this was a BTB story or something else.

What's frustrating for me is the ending. Forget the grammar Nazi's, sure you need an editor but it was still a fun little read. What I would like you to reconsider is to add at least one final chapter. This story is not complete. What happens to Dan and Carrie? They live happily ever after? Honestly, no offense, that was terrible way to end this story. All the way through there was so much drama and then you crashed it. The way you wrote the struggle between the emotional turmoil of the Dan and Carrie was seriously full of hurt. 6 solid chapters of a marriage on the verge of crashing and then nothing.

Again no offense, perhaps let other authors add the final chapter to this story. Personally, I don't think Dan and Carrie would have made it even with the children to consider. I feel Dan should have divorced Carrie and married Janet. That's the way I would have finished it. Carrie's fantasy would have blown up in face. Instead of Dan losing Carrie to a BBC, Carrie loses Dan to a superior black woman.

I've read some of comments here. That's the best part of these kind of story's. Don't listen to the bullshit. Please keep writing.

I can't believe how far you went to attempt a RAAC. And that's just what this feels like. There was a lot of realism in the first 5 chapters as Dan went through natural reactions to this kind of crap from an obviously cheating slut wife. There is no way any of that goes away just because of some absolutely improbable meeting of Janet's ex-husband and his should have been soon to be ex-wife months earlier. I don't recall this being such a small town they live in that same that preposterous would happen. This story may have the worst ending I've ever read in this forum. And considering what it started out as, that's a shame.

Great story. Well written. Yes it has editing issues but oh well doesn’t detract from the story.

My concern is the biggest issue was not addressed. Even though Carrie and Dan can try to get back together there is still the issue of his self confidence in bed. The hardest thing for him to get over was whether or not he was enough for her. Regardless of what she tells him it will still reside in his brain that he’s not enough and continue to erode his brain eating at him, rotting him from the inside. Always questioning until one morning she finds him hanging from a rafter in his garage.

I like the premise. And the first chapter was great.

But subsequent chapters were not as good. The "stream of consciousness" device is hard to pull off. Here it came across as stilted and disjointed. With the author writing both husband and wife's thoughts it was hard to follow and process.

Plus they vacillated so much I had a hard time find these swings to be legitimate.

As I said. Conflicted. Worth a read but it lacks polish. 4 stars.

Plop! Very disappointing ending danoctober! Very disappointing! Like wtf? I read this straight through and could have read more, but you killed the story with the ending. Why? Take responsibility and simply FTDS!

The last couple of paragraphs summed it up. Cheaters and cuckolds everywhere, all is forgiven and they lived happily ever after.

It took you forever but you got there ... eventually!

How to destroy a perfect marriage?

Shouldn't it have been "cheating, angst and back together again"?

Six chapters of rubbish.

NVD - Good point . . . a realistic possibility as written . . . though there are people who never deal with their insecurities . . . coping instead by just hitting a mental 'Reset' button of sorts. I have to hope that's the case here.

Anony 2/19 - No 'cheating' in this story until close to the end, and even that wasn't really completed. Most of what happened was with a spouse's consent, albeit reluctant.

Wrong decision,he should have dumped her.

I must have missed the part where the stupid cuck decided to admit what a loser he was and suck the cum straight out of Carl

He left the cheating cunt becuase in three hours another man gave her more satisfaction joy and fulfillment than he had in his entire life

Why would he go back to a woman who doesnt love him and he knows isnt fulfilled by him on any level?

He got even with the bitch, got his mojo back with his lover's praise, got even with Carl, and the bitch got her priorities straight! All that was missing was a remark to the effect that her next fantasy may be deadly.

Fairly good story but the ending is missing something. There's no closure.

You're a very good writer and I enjoyed how you told this very exciting tale. I am a bit disappointed with 06. It smacks and feels a bit too convenient. As if you decided that you ending the story now whether we like it or not - or were you going onto something else? As if you decided to put a ribbon on it and tie it nicely into a perfect bundle. There is just too much important stuff that was happening off camera and you spoiled a very wonderful story. The only chapter I am disappointed with. Even though the feelings that went through him and her whilst they were examining WHY this was happening in their life - was a bit repetitive at times. ALL in ALL - I liked it very much. Will be reading your other stories as well! Thanks for sharing!

Needed more.

Yes she now hurt but...

She was willing to risk destroying her family for a reason.

I don't see how the husband could take her back.

Needed more to make a relationship that damaged better.

I hate to post negative things in comments. . .but that ending SUCKED! (so much so that I can't keep silent about it)

It was long & pondering, yet it still managed to feel rushed and incomplete.

It went in a totally bizarre & ridiculous (and not in a good way) direction that made no sense at all.

It felt super contrived and even seemed to ignore all the enthralling, deep, emotional stuff from previous chapters that drew me in. And just throw it all out the window to wrap it up in a 'Disney' style ending.

Honestly, as a rule of thumb, I hate final chapters for these stories. Usually because I enjoy the stories so much I don't want them to end.

THIS TIME, I hated the final chapter because I REALLY loved the story & didn't want it to end, AND because the final chapter was so terrible!

Sorry man, I love your stuff, but THIS was a fumble at the 1 yard line.

So everybody just shrugged and went home happy? Really? LOL. Sorry, but that's just stupid.

While like many, I didn’t really care for the ending. Still, it does fit the characters mindset. Self counseling via the attempt to gloss over / ignore the reality. A solution where nothing is solved.

Another chapter, maybe an A & B, one where they make it and one where they don’t?

"That's why I didn't take her particular fantasy as being that important"

The fantasy Carrie chose is the crux of the story. If it had been something benign and inclusive, they wouldn't have had any problems whatsoever.

IR cuckold porn is all about the inferior white husband being humiliated and replaced in the bedroom by a "superior" black lover. Carrie clearly spells out exactly what she was fantasising about in the first chapter, then goes right ahead and humiliates her husband when she acts out her fantasy.

Carl started taunting Carrie about how much she loves his BBC and she goes right along with it, screaming back how awesome it was. She utterly destroyed Danny's ego, humiliating the poor bastard and making him doubt his entire love life with his wife. Carrie is entirely at fault for becoming so obsessed with such a cruel and destructive fantasy... to the point where she doesn't give a shit if her husband is remotely turned on by it.

As for Danny's passiveness and letting her go ahead with the fantasy... When she browbeat him into agreeing to it, he knew their marriage was already doomed:

"I wasn't giving you permission for your fantasy. I was confirming what I already knew. I saw it in your eyes that night. An after that first conversation, I knew you would follow thru eventually with or without me. This way I knew for sure."

Carrie had worked herself up into a frenzy with her IR cuckolding fantasy, and porn alone wasn't doing it for her any more. Like a crack whore, she was desperate for a bigger fix, one that would destroy her life in the process. Ultimately, she shoulders the vast majority of the blame for this mess.

Carrie is basically just a selfish slut, who didn't give two shits about her husband's feelings. She didn't deserve a reconciliation after the way she behaved and she doesn't do anywhere near enough to rebuild Danny's crushed ego for them to have a cat in hell's chance of making it in the future.

...and the whole thing fizzles out. You didn't write an ending so much as you just stopped writing.

"The fantasy Carrie chose is the crux of the story. If it had been something benign and inclusive, they wouldn't have had any problems whatsoever."

Again, 'benign' and 'inclusive' are subjective. If he enjoyed filming, that would have been 'inclusive'. If he liked seeing another man with his wife, and would have been fine with anyone except a guy with red hair doing her, then it would have been perfectly 'benign'.

The problem (and what makes the situation interesting) is we inject OUR ideas of what is and what isn't acceptable . . . OUR ideas of what is not 'inclusive' and not 'benign'. But our ideas could be dead wrong as applied to each of them. Since this scenario was unacceptable to many (but not all) of us, WE claim she should have known, and that she was out of line. But really, if he agrees, it's wrong to assume she could read his mind. She might have been more sensitive, but that's about as far as we can go. He could have been more secure and assertive, and they both could have been more communicative, but again, that's as far as WE can go. They had an experimental sex life, so they might have done other things some would find disgusting or repulsive or whatever. Again, that's the reader's perspective.

We can't assume he thinks just like us. And, while she wrongly assumed he thought like her, in real life, none of us could really know what he's feeling until HE communicates it to us. Now, the author told us what he was thinking, so we have an advantage. But no one told her what he was thinking. And his behavior was ambiguous . . . he seldom if ever openly disagreed assertively (even at the end).

His mechanisms for dealing, especially as defined in the final part, were such that getting back together was the most likely outcome (even if not the most likely from the point of view of those of us who feel that they both should think and act the same as WE do). He is insecure, non-assertive, non-communicative, and generally not the type to analyze and work through problems (hints of this are given along the way). His M.O. seems to be: 'After a period of hurt and self-pity, put it behind you, hit the reset.'. Now, I suspect she WILL dwell on it, and it will impact her future actions, which is good, because if he won't be more communicative, she'll have to be a lot more sensitive. My hope though, is that they both would become more communicative (but these fictional characters seldom listen to me)!

And again, regardless of what one wants to call it, IF HE KNOWS, then he is NOT a cuckold by the original definition. If he does NOT enjoy watching it (and does NOT find it arousing) then he's not a cuckold in the new 'kink' definition.