All Comments on 'Initiation Ch. 02'

"I soon found out, Laura Judy Jenny's mother and other aunts came over to me told me it was now their turn." There were just too many errors like this to be an enjoyable read.

------this old brain!

But keep trying you will get there. To be honest, I'm more into mMmmM/F than this.

Maybe I'm being realistic. (M/FFFFFFFFF ?????? Maybe m/FFFFFFFF works)

I liked the fact that the initiation ceremony was optional but, given that it was, I don't see why the absolute secrecy. There seems to be no reason why the initiates should not have at least a general idea of what is involved. This is particularly as the initiation was so very tame and didn't really live up to the promise of the build up.

But I hope it is taken as constructive criticism. In the story you are joined by your brotherS-in-law. You were joined by BROTHERS who happen to related as in-law. Now you could say they are IN-LAWS without the word brother attached (or sister or aunt or uncle, etc). Please remember this as constructive criticism /comment.