Is The Third Time a Charm?

"I fell asleep in the waiting room. It was morning and one of the doctors came to see me. I was afraid he was going to tell me my little Carly didn't make it."

I stopped talking for a few minutes while Julie started crying. It brought tears to my eyes also. She told me how sorry she felt and could almost feel how I must have felt. Useless, hopeless and able to do nothing.

"As the doctor approached me he said that Carly hadn't improved but hadn't got any worse either, that she was stable. If she made it, she was going to need a lot of medical attention. Then he looked at me and said, 'Not to give you false hope but she's a fighter. This little girl wants to live.' I started crying again."

"I asked the doctor about the baby's drug addiction and he told me they had to actually give her drugs until she got a little bigger. There was no way her system could take a total withdraw."

"He said he talked to Ellie about using drugs since she was the one who had the baby. He would have to report her but he said, after talking to her, they decided not to prosecute her as long as she went to a drug rehabilitation program. He also had her sign a form saying she would use some type of pregnancy protection so she wouldn't bring another child into the world like this. He said it was only enforceable if she ended up pregnant, then they could have her arrested. There was no program that I would be forced to attend. They couldn't prove that my usage of drugs lead to Carly's addiction since Ellie was such a heavy user. But deep down I knew it had to be partly my fault also."

"The doctor told me there probably wouldn't be much change in the next few days, seeing Carly was stable, and that I should go home and clean up. They would contact me if there was any change."

"I went back to our apartment and packed up my few belongings. Just about everything belonged to Ellie. I was able to get all my belongings in my car. Then I headed over to see an attorney. I decided I wanted a female attorney since I was going for custody of a child."

"After explaining everything to the attorney, she said we shouldn't have any real problems as long as Ellie agreed. She said she would stop by and talk to Ellie the next day."

"I went to one of my buddies where I lived before and asked if I could bunk with them till I find a place or decide what I was going to do. I dropped off my stuff and headed back to the hospital. The nurses held up their hands like 'nothing we can do but wait.' I asked the head nurse if I could go in and see my baby. She saw the tears in my eyes and said, 'Sure, come on. I'll take you to see her.'"

"As we walked up to the incubator, I started crying. The nurse had tears in her eyes also, looking down on this little tiny body with all these tubes in her knowing she's fighting to live. It had to be the saddest sight I have ever seen in my entire life. I put my hand on the incubator hoping that my little girl would know that she was not all alone. I know it probably wasn't true but I felt a connection to my baby touching the incubator. I told the nurse that I wasn't a religious man so I asked if she could say a prayer for my baby. I was all tied up inside and didn't know what to say. She said sure and we both put one hand on the incubator and held hands with the other. She said a prayer and I could feel a calm come over me. After the prayer we walked back out and I took my seat in the waiting room."

"I dozed off until I heard a buzzer go off and looked up and every nurse and doctor were running into my daughter's room. I thought, oh God please be with her. About five minutes later the head nurse came out and told me that Carly had a reaction to the drugs but they got it back under control."

"The next day my attorney and I went in to see Ellie. She said she was sorry about the baby but knew having it was a mistake. I wondered how a woman could be so hard core about a child she had."

"Ellie signed all the necessary papers for the divorce. Since there was no contest and no assets to divide, my attorney said it would go through quickly. She did mention that Ellie could give up all custody and parental rights to Carly but needed to keep her on the insurance so she could get proper care. Ellie agreed to it but said she wanted nothing to do with the child. In fact the next day she left the hospital without even seeing her baby."

"Everyday I went to the hospital I would sit and wait. I got my professors to assign me homework and used a laptop to complete more credits. It gave me something to do while sitting there day after day. Everyday I was allowed to go in and sit with Carly for awhile. I would talk to her and told her she was my miracle baby and would pull through. I told her that I would always be there for her. This went on day after day after day. We would move two steps forward and one step back. The doctor told me that every day that went by was in Carly's favor. It gave her body time to build up."

"Carly started to gain weight. She had been in the hospital for about two months then. The doctors said it looked like her chances were good or at least better but now they had to deal with the drug use."

"I remember after two months she was released from the incubator and put in a real baby bed. I was allowed to hold her. The first time I held her had to be the greatest day of my life. She wasn't very big but as the doctor said she was a fighter. She was also starting to take on some characteristics. You could see her baby blue eyes and blond curly hair. She was behind on her growth but that was to be expected."

"It was great to see all the nurses come in every day and talk to her and hold her. They also helped me at feeding time. Carly was finally allowed to eat. She started with formula and then soft baby food."

"This went on for two more months. Carly was four months old when she was released from the hospital. I got a one room apartment and the two of us lived there. My dad sent me some money so I could have a day care nurse. It helped pay for the expenses the insurance didn't cover. I was able to pick up some computer jobs that I could do in the apartment. It helped Carly and me survive. At the end of the semester my mom and dad drove in a van to California to take Carly and me home with them."

"That was only the second time they saw Carly. They flew in after she had been about two months old. I remember them crying when they saw her. I don't think they believed she would make it. At that time she looked like a two week old baby instead of two months. But now they were going to be surprised."

"They came through the door and Carly was sitting in her play pen. She was about eight months old then but looked around four months. My parents smiled when they saw her. She was my little miracle baby and she was my total pride and joy. Now she had other family who would love her too."

"Well, Julie, that pretty much covers it. We moved back here and I got a job as a computer wizard. I didn't get a degree but because of my skills I didn't need one. I know one thing ... make that two things. I'm a computer wizard and a hell of a good daddy."

"Carly is a little over two years old. She is still a little small for her age but she's a beautiful little girl. She's smart and catches on fast. Her doctor says she'll be caught up to her age group in no time."

"Now I have two questions for you. First will you take Carly into your day care? I want to relieve some of the stress on my family. They've been through a lot the last year. Second, are you going to tell me about your life the past five years?"

"Well, Larry, as far as my life goes, it's pretty complicated and I don't think I can tell you about it right now. Not after hearing about you and your daughter. I'm a bit shocked, bewildered, I don't know what word I'm looking for. Then as far as the day care goes I'll have to ask my mother. She is half the partnership. I don't know if we're equipped to handle 'special needs children' and I would guess that she's not potty trained yet."

"Look, Julie, Carly isn't a special needs child. She plays just like every other child. She takes a special medication but that's it. And yes, she is not potty trained. Most two year olds aren't. Julie, I know you don't want to hurt my feelings and are worried about Carly. But I'll guarantee you will love her the minute you see her. I'm not wearing blinders. I know my little girl. Everything I'm telling you is true. Just give her a chance and meet her."

Julie looked up at me and said, "Okay, I can't make any promises to you until I talk with my mom. Please don't hate me if we can't take her. Stop by tomorrow around one and we will meet Carly and take it from there."

"Thank you, Julie, you won't regret it and it's been wonderful seeing you again. Will your dad shoot me when he sees me?" I laughed. "I haven't seem him since you ran out of my car."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Larry, I never told you. My father passed away over a year ago. That's one of the reasons we started the day care center. It helps pays the bills as well as the other benefits."

"I'm so sorry to hear that. I know you loved your father very much. Please accept my deepest sympathy even though it is belated."

"Thank you, Larry, I honestly don't think dad liked you. He saw me running in the house but never questioned it. He was old fashioned but very smart. He knew when to leave well enough alone. If he met you today, I think he would think differently of you. You have to remember I was his little girl and all men were the big bad wolf."

"Julie, can I ask a special favor of you? Would you kiss me goodbye in front of the guys. Just so the guys will see? I'd love to torment them."

Julie laughed and agreed. We stepped inside the door and went and sat down. The reunion was about over and the people were leaving. Once the guys were looking our way, Julie leaned across the table and kissed me. My God, it was the same as I remembered five years before.

Chapter 2 Julie's Past

After the big kiss with Julie, it brought back old memories. She was a really sweet person. I still don't know about her past and why she hasn't gotten hitched. I did feel bad hearing about her dad dying. I knew she was close to him. My life at least has straightened out. I work for a computer firm and also do repairs on my own. I'm glad I went to Silicon Valley for the training. I know I could never have gotten that kind of knowledge here. They had the best programmers in the world out there.

My life is finally turning around for the better. Hopefully no more stupid mistakes for this guy. I have my little miracle Carly who's been through hell for her two plus years of life. But now her recovery seems to be going well. She's bright, pretty and has a personality that will melt your heart. I thank God every day for saving her. I'm not a religious man like I've mentioned before but I'll argue until my dying day that God intervened to save Carly's life.

Well, it was time to bundle up my little bundle of joy and take her to see Julie and her mother. I knew that Julie was just trying to be nice to me about watching Carly in day care. She was always that kind of person. She might be mildly surprised when she meets my little girl wonder.

I put on her heavy coat and hood. It was pretty cold out and I didn't want her getting sick. I kissed her as I put the big old hood on her head. Hell, I could have had anything wrapped up in that big coat. I put her in the car seat and headed over to see Julie.

I pulled up in front of the house. They had a big sign in the yard, 'Marie and Julie's Day Care.' Just looking around the yard you could see the woman's touch. It was something woman had. I glanced over next door and saw there was a house for sale. I was wondering if Julie and her mom were thinking of buying it and expanding their day care center.

I opened the back door on my mini SUV and took out my little girl. If I could only find her in the coat and hood. I could remember back when I was just a tiny kid and my mom would put that old heavy coat on me. She would say, "Now go outside and play." Hell, I couldn't even get my arms together to make a snowball. Here I was doing the same thing to Carly.

I carried her up the few stairs and knocked on the door. I was met by Julie all dressed up in a beautiful dress. She didn't wear the granny dresses anymore. The first thing I said was, "Still wearing dresses at home?" as I smiled.

She said, "Old habits never die." Then she said, "No, I wear slacks because of all the kids. Mom and I just got back from church."

I looked at her and smiled, "Did you pray for me?" Which was a pretty common response.

She said, "As a matter of fact I did, and I prayed for Carly too." Boy, that was enough to make my eyes water.

We walked in and I sat Carly down on a chair. I took off her big old coat and hood and then picked her up. Julie looked at her and then at me. "My God, what a beautiful baby. I mean, Larry, she's absolutely beautiful."

I had put a little pink dress on her with matching panties over her diaper. She had blond hair with the little curl on her forehead, bright blue eyes and rosy cheeks from the cold.

Julie reached out for her and Carly went to her right away. I think kids can sense when people care for them. I looked at Julie and said, "Julie, this is my little miracle, Carly, and Carly, this is Julie. Can you say Julie?"

Carly said, "Du-ly." I said "No, Carly, say Juu-lie." She puckered up her little lips and tried again. "Duu-lly," she spoke.

I looked at her and said close enough sweetheart. Duly it is. I looked at Julie who was laughing and told her, "It would be easier for you to change your name to Duly than for Carly to call you Julie." Then we were both laughing.

Marie, Julie's mother came in the room. Julie introduced me and then her mom saw Carly in Julie's arms. She immediately held her arms out to Carly and she went right to her. "My God, how precious is she? Hi, sweetie, how are you?" Carly looked up at her and said, "Nanna." I said "No, Carly that's not nanna."

Marie looked at me and said, "She can call me Nanna if she wants to. A lot of the kids call me grandma. I much prefer that over Mrs. Morgan, or having the little kids call me Marie."

Again Carly said Nanna which made Marie smile. Julie looked at her mom and said, "Larry wanted to enter Carly in our day care, mom."

Marie interrupted Julie and said, "Of course we will take her."

Julie spoke again, "Mom, you know she isn't potty trained. I thought that was one of your rules?"

Her mom said, "Well, I'm changing that rule for Carly. I'll be the one to potty train her. After all I'm her Nanna."

I couldn't help tearing up over that remark. Everyone loved my little miracle girl but no one more than me.

Julie asked her mom if she would take care of Carly for a little bit. She wanted to talk to me. Her mom looked at us and said, "Sure , no problem, come with Nanna, Carly. I have lots of toys to show you."

Julie looked at me and said, "I need to apologize to you. You told me all about you and Carly yesterday and I didn't tell you my story. I will tell it to you now but you must promise me that it will never leave this room. There are only about three people in this area that know any of it. Mom and dad were the only two that know the whole story."

"My God, Julie, of course I would keep anything you tell me confidential. You have my solid promise I'll never tell anyone."

"Well, let me began by telling you that I went away to college also. Not all the way to California but at least a couple of states away. It's not important for you to know where, in fact I would prefer you not know. Of course dad was old fashioned and didn't want me to go at all, but mom and I convinced him that I had a scholarship and it would be good for me. Against his better judgement he agreed to let me go. Anyway in my junior year I went out with my girlfriends. I was still kind of shy and of course all the guys wanted was in my pants which wasn't going to happen till I met that special someone.

Well, I went out with my girlfriends and we went bar hopping. I didn't drink and still don't but I went along and just drank pop. Somewhere, somehow, someone put a date rape drug in my pop. The next thing I remembered was that I was in the hospital. I had been raped repeatedly. I don't remember anything but the pain I woke up with in the hospital."

"My God, Julie, I had no idea. I feel so sorry for you." She had tears in her eyes so I put my arms around her to comfort her.

She continued, "The doctors told me that I was found in a motel off the highway lying on the bed. Someone had called the police and rushed me to the hospital. They did catch three of the men who took part. I heard their names on police reports but honestly never have seen any of them. Just a bunch of guys out to take advantage of a girl. The three were found guilty of using a date rape drug. Because I really didn't want to go to trial we plea bargained the charges. They were evicted from college and ordered to serve time."

Julie stopped for a minute to catch her breath. I continued to hold her gently. I knew that is what she needed right now, just to be held. I know why she didn't tell me the school now. She knew I had a temper and was worried what I might do.

"The doctors told me that I would be alright. All the bruising on my body would heal but there was a chance that I may not be able to have children. My insides were pretty messed up. Only time will tell. Of course you know I'm not the most sexually active person so I guess I just have to wait and see. I was in the hospital a little over a week and then my parents came and got me and took me home. There was no way I could go back to that school."

"I changed my studies to child care management and finished school locally. I chose child care because I love kids. My mom does too but will probably never have the grandchildren grandmas think about. So I did the next best thing. I convinced mom to go into business with me and she could take care of all the little ones she desired."

Julie started crying again. Damn, what could I do for her. Why do such innocent people get harmed? First little Carly and now Julie.

"I think that's why mom got so attached to Carly so quickly. We don't have any kids that small, besides her being so darned precious."

"I need to tell you that I never felt anything during the rape. To the best of my knowledge I was out the whole time. Every now and then I get a little flashback but don't know if it means anything. The police and doctors wanted me to go to rape counseling but I don't remember anything. There would be nothing to bring up. I sure don't want to be put under and them find things to be brought up. I can tell you that no woman deserves to be raped. It isn't fun and games, it's torture. I had to only put up with the after effects and that was bad enough. Why any man would think a woman would like it is beyond me."

"Well, Larry you now know my little secret too. That makes it pretty even. Please never mention it to anyone. I just needed to tell somebody and after yesterday and your story about Carly I felt I could tell you."

"Julie, your secret will always, and I mean always, be safe with me." I hugged her and gave her a very light and gentle kiss. Then Marie appeared with Carly.

I looked at Carly and said, "Well, sweetheart time go home. Let's get your coat back on, it's cold outside."

That was the beginning of my new relationship with Julie and her mom. Every morning five days a week I'd take Carly over and would be greeted by either Julie or Marie. They would take Carly and I would leave. They were always busy first thing in the morning. So I didn't bother them. I was always one of the last to pick up their kid. One reason was because of my schedule and the other was I got to talk to Julie.