All Comments on 'Jim Sees Dead People! Ch. 07'

Nice continuation. I think you need a new arc for the story, one that will keep us guessing as to what will happen.

This chapter was 95% sex. A tad too much. It's like the author is trying to make up for a weak plot by adding a lot of suck and fuck and hoping the readers don't notice.

It’s an interesting premise, and pretty engaging, but you could use an editor to catch the smaller mistakes you make that take away from the flow. The one that tripped me up this chapter was “hoar”…