All Comments on 'Just Once'

Marcie becomes Maria

Even a regular contributor like your self needs a good proof reader

Hopefully this is the LAST story for Kali's intriguing story of infidelity. This particular story had added another person with a son. That took away from the base of the whole story about Marcy (Marcie in this tale) and her lover, Dr. Trey and how they planned to cuckold Rick, like it or not. Overall, this story doesn't match up to the last few (from last week) but was better than the first ones that were posted ( right after Kali left the ending open). This is worth 3/5 stars.

Great as always Mr. Webb

Likely the best of the JO progeny thus far. The death by a thousand cuts approach to ruining Marcie's fuck fest was well done. The MC's relationship with young Jacob was a refreshing mix of paternal affection and childhood innocence not commonly seen in LW. On top of all that, who doesn't have a soft spot for the generous, encouraging mentor called a Little League Coach?

Colombia, not Columbia

5⭐

very good result even if I do not appreciate the small revenge on cheaters in Colombia.

The best way to do this is to move on with your life and live it to the fullest.

Thanks for sharing your talent.

Good story!

5

A different ending that really covered the bases... hahaha couldn’t resist.

Got the war time right which made the story move along easier. The baseball and live interest seemed to ease the tension without seeming forced. The childish pranks on the cheaters was awesome and realistic. All in all I really liked this ending for the realistic tone it set.

Good story. Really two stories where I felt I was reading an altogether different standalone story. Anyway, this was a good read. Not sure why, but I really was gleeful that the Nielsens' in this story divorced. I felt that Leslie was really the one who is enjoying their sharing lifestyle and Vincent just went along as Leslie was apparently the aggressor for sex session not Vince. The author was still consistent on Marcie's character. Again altogether a good sequel for Kalimaxos' story.

Thanks goes to the author for the effort and sharing of this one.

Just amazing! I have followed, I think, all of the Just Once follow-ons to Kalimaxos' tantalizing story, but this is easily the best. The best written, altho many were very well done. With a suitably happy resolution for the poor husband, and an uncertain future for the cheating frau. You win the prize. I just haven't figured out what that is yet. One thing I have learned reading Literotica is that retired Army Intelligence guys have super-human willingness to break the law to help out a buddy and with science-fiction effectiveness. That didn't spoil my fun at all.

It's Colombia, not Columbia!

Meh.

Let's be clear. A fling is at most a weekend of sex. Its short. That's why it is called fling. I understand that 6 weeks is a fling compared to twenty plus years. But what she asked for was a full blown affair. Hardly a fling. She really was a delusional selfish cow of a character.

Best version. Fun read. Had to laugh at his various methods of revenge on the idiots.

Good story, and well written.

It must be a challenge to write an original conclusion, after so many others have tried.

As always, StoneyWebb has submitted a 5* effort. Thank you.

One thing is clear: Marcella should not have left her husband that letter but simply fucked Trey on the down low. 😀

Once again, we have a cheated on husband who was a fantastic lover, something you don’t get to be without a lot of practice, but too noble to screw someone else until officially divorced. Just once, I’d like to see one of these noble husbands say, “I’d really like to, but I have to make sure that there’s no evidence against me, legally, before the divorce.” That, at least, would seem more realistic.

So, has anyone tallied it up, to see whether it has been M Maxos or Mr Anderson who has inspired more new endings?

great ending version. No nitpicking here, like the spelling o Kolumbya!

I think this one is the best of all follow ups. No ex-seal stuff like jumping out of the plane to abduct the doctor or some other unbelievable shit. Just something to ruin their time together even though still illegal and would carry some prison time. But nothing over the top and thats a plus. Then he faced Marcie like an adult and not like a psychotic kid. All in all, very good resolved. I got a question to whoever likes to answer, is part of his pension really worth half the amount of a house? From what Ive read its not a small house in a pretty good neighbourhood. And couldnt he also claim part of her pension, in the original part she worked also her whole life. Its something I was wondering for a long time because where I live the income disparity between gender is negligible and most of the time even zero because of laws, guidelines, ect.

Yep, a good conclusion to the story, well done Stoney.

I really enjoyed your tale.

Well worth 5/5

This is probably the best of the endings. Of course I don’t know what one does to arrange a killer bees attack. And I can’t imagine that any off the shelf skin cream contains peanut oil, since so many people have peanut allergies. But the basic plot and execution are excellent.

Very good ending to this story. 5 stars from me

A good story, perhaps the best of the ends for me because it wasn't focused on only the failing relationship. Besides, I'm a sucker for kids. Thank you for your story.

somewhere east of Omaha

One of the top three story endings, probably the best if I'm honest. It had it all!

I enjoyed the read. However, I often wonder why the guy has to take his time to decide if he wants to end the marriage. He past behavior (not mentioned in this story) and her attitude and the letter should be enough. No need for a video as he knew what she was doing and he said they already had a full night of sex.

Not bad. Not great.

Pros:

— making the bitch’s time in Bogata a real treat 😈

— like every version of this, rejecting Leslie the Slut

— completing the divorce

Cons:

— The whole Kimberly and Jacob storyline. While nice and cute….just didn’t fit either the original K setup or the overall plot

— Marcie just didn’t pay enough of a price. In particular….from her kids

3 ***

One of the better takes on this.

Good follow up. Why do Doctors Without Borders have to go to the emergency room when something happens to them? Can't the take care of each other? And, please, they were in Colombia in South America not Columbia in South Carolina.

Best one yet

In this story, the focus should be on concluding the initial storyline which is between Marcy and Rick plus Leslie, Deirdre, and Trey. Instead of that, a new character (Kimberly) is introduced and that distracts the flow from the initial story. Even the end doesn't feel delicious and fulfilling because of that

My preference is, I want to know more about Trey's aftermath. He's the villain assigned to this story, so the consequence of all his accumulated bad deeds must be told, at least in passing even if author wants to portray MC as having 'moved on'.

Authors have to stop trying to continue the story, instead tell a new story inspired by that theme. I'm sure Just Once's similar storyline/plot by other author exist somewhere completed. Most of the stories just as February Sucks was feels like reading a reboot instead of continuation. They did not focus on the original story. If this is a standalone story from beginning to end, this is a good story. But as a continuation, it got distracted by new characters.

Well done, sir! Yours is one of the top follow-ons from Kalimaxos' story. You balanced his military experience/ethos along with a believable path forward for his life. Several attempts had him "doing nothing" while his wife was in Columbia, something that a loving husband with his contacts would never tolerate unpunished. His retribution wasn't over the top, but effective and she paid in the quality of her remaining life. [I usually avoid commenting too deeply on plot content as that is the author's prerogative and I respect that. I guess what i"m trying to say is your story was believable, sucked me into your universe for a time, and was a solid finish to the main story.] 5*

"As an Army intelligence officer, I had made many contacts and had many favors owed to me." - Please, stop this What would he do if he was just an ordinary guy without many contacts and favors owed?

/

"Marcie complained that Kimberly was depressing the property values of the entire neighborhood." - If you're not planning on selling, who cares? Lower property values means lower property taxes!

/

"Now I realized that Kimberly was very pretty, if a tad overweight. Still, the extra few pounds didn't diminish the woman's attractiveness." - Is it me, or is this sexist and condescending?

/

"Marcie admitted that she doesn't know if I cheated, but she has convinced herself that she is still entitled to this fling." - Even if he DID cheat, the Red Roof Inn hasn't been addressed. If the obvious is true, then she already had her "revenge" for his "cheating."

/

"Then I felt bad about my behavior and went to apologize." - Why?

/

Even if he DID fuck Leslie, she decided on her own to fuck Trey, no discussion with Rick or his permission granted. If he would have fucked Leslie, it wasn't anything that he asked for, and he had her permission; two totally different situations.

/

@Mrhappy4aa, this story doesn't need to "match up" with the other stories. The whole point is to have a different take.

/

Not to repeat, but could have done without the revenge things.

I liked this ending. Best of all the other versions.

Good ending to the story. Some revenge and HEA. One thing people say and write is "could care less" when they Really mean "could NOT care less".

Well done! 5 stars

I especially liked the Little League coaching angle here. My next story is partially written and coaching kids is a major part of the story. This story seemed as credible as any follow up to the original could. I enjoyed the ice cream part. I always did that with the kids on my team and they would often ask who won the game once they had the ice cream. It really didn't matter much to them. Coaches and parents are more concerned about scores and winning and losing. Participating on a team and making friends is winning. Nice story.

This story was just meh, for me. Very little emotion, very flat. The wife never grew or showed any understanding for what she did. Very shallow. When I read these stories that's what I look for. The cheater needs to understand what they've done, and what they lost by their actions. This wife seemed very two dimensional, like a four year old caught stealing a cookie, no growth.

Very good story. I don't normally appreciate the "I was in military intelligence" stories, but since it resulted in some fun adolescent pranking it was fun. I do like a happy ending and nothing ends a cheating story as well as finding happiness. Add in a couple of good kids and that's an ending I can endorse! Thanks for sharing (the story).

Nice ending

Best StoneyWebb BTB so far. Five stars

good story, but I am tired of stories that have Rick magically using his military intelligence contacts to create havoc in Colombia. I'm starting to root for Marcie!

This story is the freshest and one of the best finishes yet. 5 *

This is best ending so far. Well written and logical. A good read.

I think this is the best of “ The Rest Of Story “

Nice version.

Excellent 5 star story! The cheating slut got her just reward!

Definitely in the running for the "best of the rest".

The wife cheating with a doctor on a Doctors without Borders trip theme was explored by Richard Gerald in his stories, Unfaithful and Always Faithful in her Fashion.

"But I could care less what she thinks." This phrase, written the way you have it, means the opposite of what you wanted it to impart. The correct phrase is: "I couldn't care less".

"But I COULDN'T care less what she thinks." On the care-meter, if there was such a thing, you'd be registering a Zero; bupkis, nothing, zilch, nada, zip. You absolutely don't care at all, there's NO way you could care less because you're at zero.

However, "But I could care less what she thinks", means exactly the opposite. If you COULD care less, that means you care SOME, you just don't make it clear how much. You might care a lot, we don't know because there's no way to quantify how much in such an ambiguous statement. The only thing we know for sure, is that you still care about her.

It's okay, we know what you meant, but I thought I'd point out that you're saying it wrong. A lot of society gets it wrong too, I guess because it's a tiny bit easier to say it the wrong way. Just thought I'd mention it.

I liked your story and gave it 5 stars. It seemed "happier" than the others. Thank You.

What do you mean "treated you" you cheated on your wife! You were not man enough to fess up to it and you got caught. Then she decides to get a little and tells you upfront and you whine? You go off and pursue your career apparently without any consideration to how hard it is for her and you get mad at how she treated you? What a dick. This is why they used to require commanding officers permission to marry. I would ban it.

Story had promise, fell short, anger issues. LOVE. Slap hapy papy #9

One of the more better versions. 5 thumbs up

Good version.... our hero should definitely score a new hottie to run off into the sunset

That was fun.

Well written as usual, even with the odd spelling mistake which didn't matter and yes probably the best so far...I have a funny feeling there will be more. Thank you Stoney good work.

PS. Did I really just read sbrooks comment complaining about a description of someone in this story as being 'sexist and condescending' ...on this site...heaven forbid.

Not bad, I give it 3 stars. My biggest issues were that actions against Trey and Marcie were childish, no problem with him getting revenge but the path he took was just corny. Other issue was his relationship with Kimberly. Would think after how his relationship with Marcie he wouldn't so quick to jump back into marriage.

Stoney, thank you for not having Rick become supper sex god and have four more children that he wouldn't live to see grow up. It was great that his older kids were happy to include Jacob as one of their own.

five stars from me

Interesting take. I was caught up in Rick's comeback story, and reports of Marcie's misfortunes almost started to feel like a distraction. Was resolved pretty well, ultimately.

Same story, same ending, few minor detail changes but otherwise “same old same old.” This story can’t really have any other ending unlike say “Feb. Sucks” which has a little wiggle room.

This is one of those that needs to be autopsied. Let's look at the pieces and see what the evidence indicates. Just like an autopsy I will comment on each discovery as I cut down into the body of the story.

"I tossed and turned, trying to figure out why Marcie was doing this." Why is he denying what Marcie told you in the letter? What is the basis for his supposed puzzlement? Marcie wants some strange, some romance, its a perfect opportunity for a sex vacation away from a marriage for which she has little or no value. Maybe you meant to convey that he is trying to figure out why Marcie has lost her respect for her husband and her marriage?

"Was I willing to throw away a twenty-four-year marriage?" Why are you suggesting the husband is killing the marriage? Marcie has already done that. Here you make your MC look stupid or self denigrating. Its a common and cliche' line many author's throw into the husband's contemplation, and lowers your writing to copy catting.

"Marcie complained that Kimberly was depressing the property values of the entire neighborhood. I tried to tell my wife to cut Kimberly some slack because she was struggling financially. That didn't go over well, so I stayed out of it." Do you realize you just revealed everything we need to know about Marcie and her dumb shit cuck husband in order to understand the entire story? Marcie is shallow, cruel, unfeeling, and almost devoid of normal human decency. And this clueless poltroon who supposedly wants a loyal loving virtuous wife married this empty bitch, and makes a point to allow her to exhibit and act out her contempt and disrespect without any confrontation or challenge. And he's Surprised that she develops the same disrespect and contempt for him? Marcie is a borderline sociopath, and this cuck wimp enabled her arrogance and entitlement. He deserves everything ounce of shit she dumps on him. Maybe he should have done a little bit better job of getting to know the real Marcie before he married her? Unbelievable.

From there the story is just one plot cliche' after another. Juvenile revenge antics, finding a better woman, Marcie regretting her adultery and pleading for forgiveness, the husband living happily ever after and Marcie becoming the medical community's bike. Too contrived and convenient to be realistic; in the end some kind of betrayal revenge cartoon.

I admit you had almost no substance to work with from the beginning, but you are the one who tried to make it a silk purse.

Thanks for the effort.

I really liked the build up between Rick and Kimberly.

GREAT last chapter!!!!!! Congratulations!!!!

I was expecting a yes from him when Kimberly proposed having a baby together though.... ;)

I like that you provided more insight into Marcy’s personality,

None of these stories have the solution of Rick taking the letter to the hospital administrator post haste. I would have the administrator ordering Marcie to return immediately with the other nurse, leaving the doctors there. The end results could come from this action.

Good story

Good story Stoney Webb. Your stories are always a pleasure to read.

Thank you.

@sbrooks103x You seem to me to be a person that tries to put down stories because you yourself can't even come close to having writing skills needed to be considered mediocre.

"As an Army intelligence officer, I had made many contacts and had many favors owed to me." - Please, stop this What would he do if he was just an ordinary guy without many contacts and favors owed? He wasn't an ordinary guy so it doesn't matter. Get over it!

/

"Marcie complained that Kimberly was depressing the property values of the entire neighborhood." - If you're not planning on selling, who cares? Lower property values means lower property taxes!

Some people feel entitled to stick their nose where it doesn't belong. Ever had that feeling?

/

"Now I realized that Kimberly was very pretty, if a tad overweight. Still, the extra few pounds didn't diminish the woman's attractiveness."

Is it me, or is this sexist and condescending?

It's most likely you.

/

"Marcie admitted that she doesn't know if I cheated, but she has convinced herself that she is still entitled to this fling." - Even if he DID cheat, the Red Roof Inn hasn't been addressed. If the obvious is true, then she already had her "revenge" for his "cheating."

Obviously that was part of Kalimaxo's story and not part of this one. Not all bases need to be covered to be a good story. Don't you ever leave part of a conversation out if it isn't needed?

/@Mrhappy4aa, this story doesn't need to "match up" with the other stories. The whole point is to have a different take.

If this how you really feel what is with the last comment?

/

Not to repeat, but could have done without the revenge things.

Then why repeat it?

So you can see that you are a Capt Obvious.

/

"Then I felt bad about my behavior and went to apologize." - Why?

/

Even if he DID fuck Leslie, she decided on her own to fuck Trey, no discussion with Rick or his permission granted. If he would have fucked Leslie, it wasn't anything that he asked for, and he had her permission; two totally different situations.

/

@Mrhappy4aa, this story doesn't need to "match up" with the other stories. The whole point is to have a different take.

/

Not to repeat, but could have done without the revenge things.

@kencoro your comment contradicts itself

..." a new character (Kimberly) is introduced and that distracts the flow from the initial story."

"Authors have to stop trying to continue the story, instead tell a new story inspired by that theme.

Kimberly was part of a new story. How can that be distracting if you want a new story?

Do you want continuing story or new story.

Your comment was very distracting.

I agree with autopsy anon.

At the same time, the original story is already bad to begin with. It's obvious where the original author is leading the ending towards, which is some kind of emotional only ending where Rick will accept her infidelity as not cheating because of his guilt. Read the author's other submission and you'll figure it out.

@tralan69er

The new character comment is my review of this story, the new story comment is my suggestion to authors that want to continue Kalimaxos story.

StoneyWebb didn't start a new story. It was continued from Kalimaxos' story which does not include Kimberly.

What I was trying to say is, other author should write a new story from beginning to end . They can add as much extra character as they want, and they'll have more freedom to build side characters if done that way.

I liked this ending. One of my favorites - and I've read them all.

I liked the story. I especially liked the "Bad News Bears" angle, which drew in Kimberly. I was expecting the next Mrs. to be Deidre, but oh well, that works too.

On the minus side - I'm not good with the chummy relationship between Rick and Marcie post divorce. The living across the street, inviting her & boyfriend over for BBQ, everyone getting along, etc. does not play well in my mind... too much hate from the previous dirty deeds done by both of them. I just can't see either of them getting past what was done. However, that particular slant did not prevent me from enjoying a good story.

Thanks, Stoney

Another pretty decent sequel to the story that won’t die. I really enjoyed the seven plagues visited on the cheating bitch and her lover. That was hilarious. The kid’s baseball was good too, and it led to a happy marriage for him. Too bad Marcy might end up happy, but that’s Stoney’s ending.

Damn. Stoney, you took this tale and made a soap opera out of it. It was still interesting to read. I have not been dissappointed with any of the sequels. Keep up the good work.

Excellent version.

Two things.

The Uniformed Services Former Spouses' Protection Act (USFSPA), 10 U.S.C. 1408, accomplishes two things:

- It recognizes the right of state courts to distribute military retired pay to a spouse or former spouse (hereafter, the former spouse), and

- It provides a method of enforcing these orders through the Department of Defense.

I was married to the same witch for 14 years. She gets 14/20 of my retirement, even though I served 27 years. The bad news is that I'm still paying and it never ends. He literally broke the law by refusing to pay her alimony. No biggie...

Second, it's "I couldn't care less", not I could care less'.

Otherwise, great story.

John_sixfooter, actually thinks have changed.He can off set and have her sign away her rights to his retirement. The spouse waiver form, can be used. Most of the time it’s for the house. She gives up her claim to the retirement and her let’s her keep the house. I know a sailor that didn’t retire. He just got out. He needed to extend fir 6 more months and refused to do so if he had to pay her half. He got out then a year later got a government job and sold his time to it.

My feelings were similar to those of @fritz51, enjoying the story. I would have preferred Marcie to live a miserable life.

Good story except it did a massive disservice to the selfless work done by the volunteers who devote their time to help the poor in third world countries . It would have been much better to have had the revenge occur after They returned.

Nasty character you've created. Self-satisfied, yet a whiner. Sticking the baseball in was wasted. Poor story.

Just like the variations on 'February Sucks' I am enjoying the different endings to 'Just Once.' However, I have a few pet peeves regarding incorrect phrases. One occurs a couple of times in this story. Let me put it this way: if you could care less, then why don't you? Of course it should be for example "I couldn't care less about ZetaZilch's editorial comments."

A true “Loving Wives” story which lately have become rare.

Very well done & truly satisfying.

Bill

The South American country is spelled Colombia!

Still too nice! If you have the resources to prank the cheaters in another country, you can have them killed. Set it up to look like a break in at the hotel while they are in the same room. The police report will show that they were together, so both their reputations are ruined. The husband gets to keep everything, and no one has anything to say when he moves on to a new, better, wife.

ZK

He lost his temper and she ran to the guest bedroom all upset, then he wants to apologise for upsetting her. There’s only one thing to say about that…WTF.

We all have to accept the flights of fancy authors are wont to indulge in but really?

Could and couldn't care less has been covered.

Columbia vs Colombia covered

Ex-Army with contacts - cliche

Not having sex until the papers are signed - cliche

What really concerns me is this is 2 of your stories where the MC expresses a sexist, patronising and potentially violent attitude towards women.

Kimberly was targetted as a tad overweight but it suited the woman... really? and the way you wrote her shopping list - "What I found was..." sounds like it was the 1st time he had seen her and was talking more about an object than a human.

Later he wanted to punch the shit out of Marcie... he didn't and didn't physically throw her out, but it makes me wonder what I'll find in your other stories, is it a fluke or a trend?

4 stars I just wondered who was doing all the tricks on the infamous pair could have made the story that more interesting. 'Good ribbons to bad rubbish' lol

This tralan69er dude is nitpicking comments instead of the story. He even got it wrong. Is he simping on the author? All the other comments are interesting to read until it got to him

Good story, a bit of fun reading his sabotage of their tryst.

one of the top 5 "sequels" to the cunts desire to get some strange. She was as arrogant as the democraps planning the afghani departure.

to kiteares, sometimes a slut just absolutely deserves a bithch slap that knocks her on her ass, more rarely, they deserve a flat knuckle punch right in the forehead, stunning but not as painful as the slap.

Marcie is a whore, pure and simple. Why did she leave for 6 weeks to f-ck that asshole doctor. She deserves all she gets, even disappearing and never being found...

I read it again and I still like it. The pranks are fun, but the happy ending is the best. One minor point: "I could care less" means "I care." "I could NOT care less" means "I do not care."

Good read... Frankly the husband is way too on the wimp side for any real suspension of disbelief to work for this reader. The original story centers around the one of the most cold calculated cuckolding betrayals ever written. There is absolutely no leeway on this one...the wife is a heartless harridan sociopaths in any story on this site. Her cold calculated betrayal displays public contempt for both the husband and the 24 year marriage. She cares for NOTHING except her own selfish gratification and even worse gets off to humiliating him in the worst of any possible ways. She coldly and calculatedly plans his betrayal for months....there simply is no ground for forgiveness in any manner. There is and for years has not been a marriage except in convenience.

That this wimp takes weeks to analyze this obvious fact of betrayal is one of the real weak points in the story., There simply is no common ground for any kind of reconciliation whatsoever. This extended dithering about the obvious is one of the real weaknesses in the story logic; a flaw which permeates the rest of the story. In short...it fails the test of proper suspension of disbelief.

Still the little league stuff is a good read and somewhat justifies the 4 stars I give the rest of this logically flawed sequel

very good, it pays to be proactive. 5 stars

This is a good read, one of the best of my friend Kalimaxos's work.

Best ending of the story, BUT a little over the top on the reprisals that took place in-country. But none the less, fun!!

One of the better stories I've read on this site & one of the best on this story's continuation. Well written. However, I thought that the continuing medical problems in Columbia was done a bit too much. And happy Rick found love after the slut. She left the marriage, he just did the paperwork. Even if Rick & Diedre, in Afghanistan, had sex that one time, how in creation could she equate that one timer with her 6 weeks in S. America? He should've also brought up, during the meeting, his knowledge of her activities in the motel when in Korea, but led it slide. This current trip was nothing more than a disrespect for him, of which he came on top.

Lastly, the saying goes: If you love someone, set them free. If they come back to you, they're yours. If not, they never was. 5stars on the story & how it's told.

Colombia not Columbia

This is one of the better endings for Kalimaxos "Just Once". The BTB part of the story wasn't harsh enough for my taste and what about some real payback for Dr. Trey, Rick should have sued him for destroying his marriage, but then that is the way it goes. I was glad Rick got the happily ever after but living across the street for Marcie that was a little much. 4 stars.

Much better ending.

Just fun to read the ending!

Bill S.

I’m in a battle what to rate this story. It was well interesting & well written & I like how Rick finds love & helps the baseball little league team. For that I’m considering a possible 5. But what happened in S America to both Marcy & Dr Trey was so over the top $ unbelievable to actually deminish the story’s strength greatly. It was almost as important to the story as what Rick did Kimberly & her son. That part detracts so much I’m giving it a 2.

In the end, no matter how much I like the 1st part, I find myself giving the entire story a high 3, but with no +s, it’s a 3. — Bob