by lovecraft68
Fantastic story. Your writing style is great. This is real erotica not just a sex story.
I loved the character development. A sweet sappy story that really made me care about the characters. You have a real talent. You said in your intro that this was a stretch for you and you didn't know if you had it in you, but hopefully you do.
As you said at the beginning the story took a while to unfold but it was certainly worth persevering to the end. I thoroughly enjoyed it, thank you.
This was an excellent story...nice build-up to passion and beyond. Keep up the great work!!!
I loved the story and the story line, you have done a very good job and you seriously need to consider putting out a book, you would do very well with it.
Even without the erotic part (truly erotic rather than sex) it would be a great story.
As some comment said, if it was part of an e-book, I would gladly have paid for it.
I am bookmarking your name and looking forward to reading your contributions.
That was an especially warm and tender story with a wonderfully romantic ending. Not so much an erotic story as a romance with an erotic ending. I look forward to your future submissions and will now look to see what else you've already written. Thanks.
I think you should do more like this, a lot of learning to love someone different but not too different!
This was a beautifully written story. I really enjoyed the start and the build up of repartee between the main characters. The 'Courtship' was very subtle on both their parts, as each was experiencing what the other was feeling. The 'Dinner Date' was the ice breaker and the ending was brilliant. A love story par excellence.
Please write more like this as the romance with a tinge of the erotic is a welcome change.
Excellent story, well written, holds the reader's attention. The story line builds the momentum to the actual point of coitus and the orgasmic climax.
In reading other's comments all I can say is ya me too I feel that way and the ones who are not positive can go fly a kite
Excellent character development and when they finally overcame their inhibitions that was nicely erotic. Great story!
Your story was well written and slowly built to it's climax while showing that "Good Deeds" usually get something good in return, and that doing the right thing (Payin it forward so to speak) always provides a suitable conclusion to good events.
First time reader and I enjoyed the story very much.
.. beautifully developed. Perhaps we all have a fairy godmother in our lives if we only listen. Thank you
Gorgeously written! Such a beautiful flow all around, as usual. So very sweet, touching and romantic. The sex scene described in wonderful detail, VERY HOT! I was squirming with delight!
That was a story you feel good about reading. The plot was intriguing. The characters were believable, and the ending was a great climax. Please write other stories like this one.
One of the few stories that I enjoy reading here. And its because of the way you write.
Thank you for that. And please, do not stop this. There aren't enough of your kind of writer around here right now.
but please use 'dessert' consistently, nobody eats 'desert'. :>)
Well done... I like the story and the development very much. I was short enough to keep my interest while being long and detailed enough to be a great story. One of the Best.... Keep writing.
Very well done! I much prefer this type of story. Excellent character development and pacing. Gladly gave you a 5.
JC
Very well written. There's the beginnings of a best-selling book here!
Your story was not only extremely well written, it was thought provoking, touching with that wonderful erotic edge that is so hard to capture when writing. Thanks for sharing!! Cheers Lance
I loved this story, not only was it well written but it was filled with warmth, tenderness, passion and no small amount love. It was a pleasure to read.
Keep up the good work Laura.
KLN
This is the type of story that I personally look for. Yes I enjoy the sex in these stories, but not at the expense of the story itself. And your writing is some of the highest quality I've seen on this site. Keep up the great work.
...the humor was delightful, especially the exchange among the diner customers. We'll written!
Nice character development. Keep working on it. Great story idea and well crafted. Sorry to be anonymous but it's all I can spell. Thanks.
I just sat here and could not stop reading to go to bed, i had to finish. You drew me in right away with your characters, and the way it all built, slowly coming to where you brought it...well....i loved it...it was so worth me looking again for the kind of story i knew someone would write...thank you, i thoroughly enjoyed it, and running off to see what else you have written....(angel)
This was my favorite story from this challenge. I'm gonna have to reread this one. (I'm in the middle of another book right now, so Karma will have to wait. ;-)
This is the best story I've read in a long long time. Good job
...means the universe is rewarding your kindness, or lack thereof. I don't really see Karma at work around me, so it was nice to find it in a story.
It's been a while since I read one of yours, but I see you haven't lost your touch. It was quite a change from your usual edgy writing to something sweet, tender and possibly even heartwarming.
Just keep writing them and I'll keep reading them, and enjoying them.
No rabid sex no wild parties just a gentleness that unfolded as it went along.....a beautiful story of the two of them and how their lives intermingled over a period of time....starting at the diner then her being thrown out on the streets and finally moving in to the flat....so tender...no rush just a gentle build up to the climax.....loved it - so tender - so loving and very moving...just brilliant...well done....
An excellent story that caught my attention. Each page that I turned was a great read. Please write more like this!
Realistic, but at 8 pages needlessly long.
I too believe in Karma, and have been rewarded many times over for even the smallest of good deeds. You take the filth out of what God has meant to be beautiful. I think that you are writing what Literotica should have. Thanks!
This was by far the best 'full story' I've read on here, from the beginning to end you had my attention! I'd actually like to read this in even more detail.. make it a full book, it's that good honestly, and has sooo much more potential detail that can be added to each character!!! I've cried, laughed out loud, smiled, and was turned on throughout this read! This could be a best seller for sure!!! Thumbs up and keep up the good work!
1. Love this story! And I love your style in general as well.
2. Two words best describe whoever left the anonymous comment dated 12/29/13... and they rhyme with "clucking grass-bowl".
It was a long story,,,,,true. But it took that much time to become familiar with the characters and we were introduced to some special people.
I loved the soul searching and the honesty,
The sex was sweet and hot at the same time.
Very well done.
This is what I've been looking for, and so rarely find on here. You have crafted a beautiful story with a great understanding of your subjects. I really identified with Joe, as a man who has lost his wife and tries to come to terms with life alone. Thank you for writing it.
To the author of the negative comment 29/12/13, get a life! You couldn't have written a quality story like this, so dont be so disrespectful.
I loved this story, so full of hope and the joy a second love can bring. Sometimes I just like to read a "feel good" story once in a while. 5 from me for a job well done.
I absolutely love the way this was written! Full characters who could be felt as real people, with real emotions. This is not smut, this is a well written, deep storyline, and you handled it beautifully. I love finding gems like this, and the gentleness contained in the storytelling was absolutely perfect. Thank you for posting this, this was a refreshing and wonderful read, great job! And although I'd love to see more of these two, you also did what many authors struggle with; you successfully gave the story closure at the end. Perfectly written!
Damn, this was a damn good read in general! Even without the sex scene, well written and engaging story. Bravo!
While reading the first few pages I kept thinking, "god damn get to the sex already" the story was very corny but the sex was great
I really had fun reading this story! I even found myself laughing along with the characters and at their "witty banter", as I refer to it. This story was really well written and a great story all around. I enjoyed going along with the characters and felt really connected to their back stories, despite not having a similar one to either of them.
There are two things, however, that have bothered me since I started reading your stories: 1) There seem to be a significant number of missing, misplaced or unnecessary commas throughout your stories. I'm totally sure that could be remedied with a little proof-reading from a second set of eyes though, so no worries. 2) The use of the words "to" and "too" have been used backwards in few instances. Such as "You are to sweet" and "You are going too the store". Just a little more editing things, so again, no worries! Just maybe want to borrow another pair of eyes.
Love your work!!
Really liked this story!! I've realized something about you LC, you are extreme. Your work is either really wonderful or extraordinarily abysmal. But you did hit this one over the fence. Not that the eventual outcome wasn't fairly predictable - he obviously preferred her and would eventually fall for her. But their individual stories were interesting, which is not always the case in erotica. But you do need to work on your spelling and using the correct form of words. Thank you, I was entertained as well as aroused.
Thanks for a true love story
Funny thing happened while reading this story. I didn't know anything was not correct in spelling until reading a comment. I usually get really irritated at such things. That is the mark of an outstanding author.
Length was what it took to get the story accomplished. It was not rushed nor did it drag. If you had made it shorter to satisfy some readers you would have done the story a disservice. It was perfect.
This is a page turner. When you broke the story after the Hal encounter, I was left with the question of what happened. The way you answered was perfect.
The underlying moral of the story was excellent.
Your talent is commendable. I hope karma comes back to you, the author. You deserve it.
I really enjoyed this story. I have to agree with another comment left for you, it is the best story I have read on this site. I hope that in the future you are able to write more about Joe and Karma...... Excellent Story
To give it a 5. I'm almost living the story except for not as much age difference.
I thoroughly enjoyed Karma, from her self-reliance to her eventual change of, or I should say recognition of, heart. Joe was skillful in his tenderness and true in his emotional range. You are a gifted writer and extremely good at conveying both sides of a delicate dance. Thank you so very much.
and these two are good people. I am happy for them.
lovely story.
Great story! 1 of the more important things in life - what goes around comes around. Thanks for putting into words much better than I could have. ;)
LC68, you really are one of the best writers on this site and this lovely story justs proves it!
Frankly, this type of story doesn't come often to this site. You write well, and this was on incredible story. I think I knew where it was going to end up, and you certainly did a wonderful job of bringing it all to a close. Thank you!
This is an excellent story, well thought out and presented. It brought tears to my eyes with the wonderful feelings that it brought out.
great writing, but you could have shortened it! I mean 7 pages!?!?! WTF
It was well worth the number of pages and the time to tell the story. I know the category is mature because of the spring September aspect but it is really a romance. It was very tight with out being hurried. I hope you have some more with the same quality. Now ro look.
REALLY ENJOYED THE STORY THINK THAT THEY BOTH NEEDED SOMEONE AND IT DOES NOT HURT IF THEY LOVE EACH OTHER 5 STARS PLUS
I DO HOPE THAT YOU HAVE A FOLLOW UP STORY ON THE COUPLE. IF NOT MAYBE YOU WILL WRITE ONE. A GREAT READ BUT WOULD LIKE TO READ MORE ABOUT THEM
RON
Karma was GREAT! As you mentioned, it took a while to "get to the fun stuff", but the wait was well worth it! HOT HOT HOT!
I would love to see more!
You made your fiction characters seem like real people we can care about, the toughest thing a writer must do.
Loved the character development. A well crafted story that can still progress as the lovers understand more about each other. Look forward to reading more off your work.
Thanks for an enjoyable story that made me care about the characters. Nice pacing and well written!
Great character development and plot. Best story I have read on the net!
Such a beautiful story - it made my cry a little, made me smile and touched my heart as well as my... lower bits.
So much more than I expected from a story I randomly clicked on for a quick read.
Thank you! x
Thank you for writing this story, I absolutely enjoyed how the young lady allowed the gent to help her in her time of need. And the steamy finale was so well written as well.
The way you wrote this story at first I thought it was going to be a big disappointment, but I kept reading and it was not very long until I was hooked on it so to say. The story had everything in it, humor, at the dinner, class, as in Joe, and of course the old fat disgusting Hal, but it did not have sex. Instead it had two people making loving because they were in love with each other. That in itself was better than just slam ,bam thank you maam sex. The love making meant something to both of them.
The story tugged at my heart a few times, but it was well written, had a good story line, was easy to follow, and most of all made sense. Thanks for writing and I do hope to see more of your writing here. Have a Merry Christmas and safe and wonderful New Year. Thanks again for the story. Jim
I love the development of your story, how you build up the relationship between the characters etc. I know its the end but I wish there is another story, a continuation perhaps of this one. I want to read Joe and Karma's story now that they are on a relationship.
Sorry for the bad english.
They are fantastic. The building up of romance then.......
Five stars and favorite author
I loved it!!! I love the build up but I think it needs a little more. I love your writing and I think that it would be fabulous if you wrote a little bit more to the ending. What happens to Joe and Karma is never really resolved and I think it should be. Other than that, I think it's great. Keep up the good work!
Excellent characterizations, good descriptions, vivid supporting characters (the landlord, the diner owner, the lady on the bench, etc), and a plot that moved along well. Oh yes, and a happy ending. I'm always a sucker for those.
Keep on writing please, and thanks for this one!
Fantastic story, would love to see more chapters of these two! ;)
Friendship then love then sex that's a relationship that will last. I do hope as others have said that you find a way to extend the story. Not having a creative bone in my body, I realize that may be easier said than done. Thank you for a wonderful story
Read this story long time ago...voted "5" then and will vote "5" again!!! Means a bunch to me for a couple of reasons. Was with a young high school senior lover when I was 42, out of the house and divorcing. It was very good for both of us.
I'm now in my 70s...widowed from a wonderful second marriage for a decade and have three young female friends who will have to remain friends I'm sure...but oh my do I wish not. Women my age are JUST NOT interesting at all.
Loved your story. Really like nearly all of your works.
loved it. fantastic story that is what i am looking for an emotional link. it seems no one has time to get to know each other also shows you should give people a chance.
Thanks (again) for sharing this piece. Well written in terms of characterisation and plot. The conversation part was good too, although their time in the fancy restaurant sounded a bit like report (when Karma asks Joe about his unwillingness to date).
On a more critical note (and out of context), it pales a wee bit as compared to "Home is Where the heart is". I don't know why, but that one still remains the better one for me. The emotions were raw out there.Anyway, that doesn't mean this one isn't a good read by any means. 5* for your effort.
Bard.
I never saw it ending like it did but knew that with the name of the story that something good would happen, just did not think she would end up with Joe. Keep it up, you have got a fan in me.
Cajun in Louisiana,
What can I say that hasn't been said , another great story, though I would have like to have heard the comments from the regulars where Karma worked if they had walked in arm in arm especially from that slut Maria, that would have been a classic. Plus I to think that ( Home is were your heart is ) was slightly better but only just. Well done , 5 stars again
This story deserve an ending appropriate to its content. A very well written story; deserving a "happy for ever after" ending for Karma and Joe and the children that would be fortunate having parents like them.
I didn't expect to read something that is well-written and heartwarming in an erotica site. Am a voracious reader and never a literary snob. But it is a fact that generally, people who troop to erotica sites are not really looking for literary jewels. So this piece came as a surprise for me.
I stumbled on this site a few days ago when I was feeling pretty horny and pining for a lover who is half a world away coupled with sadly finding out that my favorite old site is nowhere to be found now. I don't masturbate and never had the interest to learn how. But he was trying to encourage me to learn it because we're far from each other and reading gets me more excited than pictures and or videos. Instead, I found something that firmly supported my belief that sex is nothing without the heart. I won't settle for a stop-gap, I would wait for my lover.
Thank you for this piece.
I'm NOT a fan of older guy and a young thing, but this was good. 5*'s easy. I shouldn't feel that way since I want a younger gal and I'm older, but I know to keep up with a younger gal who loves loving would be hard at my age. I don't like what age has done, but that's reality. Daddy/Daughter is a BIG turn off to me and I NEVER read them EVER! Hey I'm a perv like everyone else just can't do that. Everything else is ok and I love this author.