Kathy's Choice

And I was 35 years old now: if I didn't have kids soon, I wouldn't be able to have them at all. I was kind of afraid of that: I liked the idea of having children, and certainly liked the process of getting knocked up, but the idea of being pregnant, carrying that for nine months, and then screaming through twelve hours of labor at the end, that scared the shit out of me. At 35, I was still as skinny as I was at 20, and I liked that. Jack liked that. But time marches on, and now I was faced with a very adult decision.

Possibly ruining my figure was something on my mind, and here was Nick again, seeing the same girl he fucked eleven years earlier, the same tall, skinny chick he had nailed on that worn log in the sunshine, on the beach, with maybe a few passersby seeing it, the same tall, skinny chick who had fucked him back with such enthusiasm four times in his dorm room, the same tall, skinny chick who finally gave that huge dick of his her ass.

Man, that hurt like Hell, but I still did it, still gritted my teeth and took it like a woman!

Of course, Nick recognized me immediately. My figure was the same, I wore my hair the same, longer than you usually see on a lawyer, pulled back in a ponytail, and my face mostly spared the wrinkles of time. He said nothing about it, but I could see it in his eyes. He remembered. Even though his 'number' had to be well into three digits by now, he still remembered me.

Naturally, he wasn't married. A guy who is a great fuck but was never boyfriend material would certainly not be marriage material. A man who could pretty much bed any woman he wanted was not the kind of man who would tie himself down to one woman.

And he'd have bedded me again if I'd let him. Jack had momentarily excused himself to take a leak, when Nick whispered to me, "Once more, for old time's sake?"

There it was: Nick had offered. There was no way to keep the memories from flooding back, how he'd taken me hard on the beach, the thrill I felt as I was walking back, with everybody able to see how I'd just been ravished, the nights in his dorm room in which I had been fucked to the heights of ecstasy and the depths of exhaustion. The feel of his hard muscles against my hands and my body, and the constant amazement at the cock as strong and large and virile as the rest of him. The sensation of getting aroused just by his presence and his voice, the anticipation of being taken by a god of sex on earth.

Once more? Surely just once would be something we could get away with. Affairs, they get discovered, but one-night stands? They mostly don't.

But then there was Jack. A good, patient lover, a man with whom I meshed well, a man I could love and live with not just in bed, but all day long, through washing the dishes, cleaning the garage, taking care of our tiny Bronx back yard, a man I could sit next to on the sofa and watch television.

And most of all, a man I could wake up next to, and still feel the same delight I did that very first morning. I knew what my answer had to be. "No, Nick, never again. College was fun and all, but we're grown up now, and never again."