by Xarth
For a first-time story, this is very good. There is potential for more stories with these characters and I, for one, would love to hear more about how their relationship develops.
it seems to me that if she was treating him so badly he would have found a way to be out of the house as much as possible. saying at dinner that he was thinking of going to college out of state or out of the country. or ask a friend if he could stay with him or go camping for the whole summer instead of just hanging around feeling crappy anything would be better than that.
Very well written and the characters have potential to continue if you so choose. I pray she is on the pill because at 18 last thing she needs is her deadbeat brothers child. Send them to collage together so they have a future lol. I can't wait to see what is next for you.
I would have liked it to be a little longer, but you managed to pull off a good story that still has potential for another chapter. We just got to the culmination a little rushed.
Re: LUSTY's comment about the pill, Yes that is one option, and so is the Morning After pill.
Keep writing, this one is well written for a new author.
A good build up and an erotic ending, but I still wanted to read more of their love affair.
I would imagine it would be hard for them to keep their hands off of each other while their parents were around after their first fuck.
Thanks for the read
Its a great story and definitely needs more but i can't help thinking i read this story before .....
Good job. Sure it was a quick read but sometimes it's better to just get the story out and done than to try for to much. Looking forward to reading the others.
You need to learn anatomy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hymen When you figure a woman's hymen is outside instead of inside; you might have a good story.
RS
Dude, you will be saying that to a lot of writers on this site. It seems that most girls lose their hymen long before they even have sex so the majority of men haven't seen one before.
I liked this story very much. While I would definitely read more of these siblings, this had a great ending, and I wouldn't expect more.
where is the character development? where is the real background? why would he want to be around her when she treats him like shit? wheres the plot? this needs to be three times longer to get to the same place and needs a second chapter to finish it off properly.
That's how a brother typically reacts when he sees his kid sister's cute little cunt for the first time. A brother is so naturally attracted to his sister's adorable little twat, a sister is so drawn to her brother's big meaty cock that it takes the most stringent social and parental pressures to keep that cock away from that twat. Here those pressures are useless, as the boy and girl give the finger to dumbass society and bring what the brother's got between his legs together with what his sister's got between hers. The boy goes into a fuck-frenzy, his sis cums like crazy, and he unloads his brotherly balls up into his sister, giving her every last drop of the creamy semen in those balls of his. Just the way it should be between a loving brother and his beloved sister.
How about some chest hair for that sexy brother? Some hairy between the pecs for Kaylee to stroke?
Haven't gotten past the first few paragraphs yet.. As soon as he knew his gf was going to ditch his ass in europe he should have gotten her stone drunk, loaded her in the car and drove to some dink town in the middle of nowhere and left her passed out in the town square. Put her passport and i.d. In an envelope and mail them to her parents. Third class postage. Bitch.
Dumbass has to stick his dickfinger in every first coupling he comes across. An inexperienced owlife dickwad.
Nobody gives a shit. So don't think that you're special, because you aren't.
I didn't realise it was your first literorica story until I read some of the comments.
I like that you had Kaylee say how hard it was saving herself for him, otherwise it might have been a bit like one other story I read where the sister's motivation could have as easily have been from abandonment issues rather than sexual attraction. That would have felt wrong to me. Mind you, I can understand how most under-30 guys would not even consider that they might be exploiting their sister in such a situation.
Anyway, it was a great story, although would have been more realistic if after they cleared the air the sister had started off with just being overly affectionate for a while, saying it was just because she'd missed her brother. Could have made for a good sexual tension build-up too.
He keeps talking about doing stupid,shit. Duh, cumming inside your virgin sister with no birth control. What a dip shit! Whats he going to do when his 18 year old sister has a baby, before she can even get her life started. Condom, dumb ass, until you can get her on the pill or an IUD, or something.
Otherwise a good story!
I enjoy your stories and you write well.
What i would really like is if you were to continue them a bit more.I don't need to hear about everything as they put their kids through college but a little more than a chance first encounter would be nice. This comment would apply to almost all of your stories.
Seriously, i like the way you write, but you're killing me with only tbe first chapter of each story. Please add a chapter or two to some of your works. You get a really good story going then it seems like you bail out.I guess i'm selfish.
Keep up the writing but don't give up so soon. Thanks anomanus😁
These stories are all good as single shots, but, whilst not expecting a salvo a few more may set us a quiver.
I never realized this was the oldest story on your account, but it's definitely always been one of my favorites. It's just as satisfying as some of the longer ones, even though it's less than a page long.
On that note, I disagree with the others - all these stories end right where they should. No need to drag out a good story into a bad one. Keep up the fantastic work!
Wanted more explained with love happening among the duo, although nice story
love reading about bothers and sisters as much as i do father and daughters.
good writing but all your stories are formulaic, which detracts from causing a lack of arousal. older brother, younger sister. bj, come in her snatch. rinse repeat.
True love finds a way. Very enjoyable incest/first time story, well thought out and written with great attention to the bond between the two characters. I appreciate your and your Muse's imagination (memory?) and abilities to bring it to your story. Thank you for sharing your vision and talents.
Someone mentioned somewhere was this was my favourite author's first submission, so I had to read it. Lovely.