Key Chain Alarm

"Daniel, you never answered my question. What the hell is that black doo-dad that Tracey keeps on her desk?"

"Mister Peake. That black doo-dad, as you call it, is simply a small item that I made for my wife before we separated. I have no idea why she kept it or why she feels the need to display it."

"Well all that is interesting, but what the hell is it and what is its purpose?"

I decided it was time to end the interview. I knew that it was a choice that only he could make, but I felt the need to take control. "That is something that you will have to get from her, Mister Peake."

There was a slight look of concern on his face as I stood.

"Mister Hemmingway. Will you at least talk to her. Before you make any decision, please talk to your wife."

I noticed a bit of desperation in his voice that seemed out of context. He was a strong, dynamic man and the hesitancy didn't seem to fit. The small act of my standing unnerved him. He was by my side as I walked out of his office. His mouth was moving, but I wasn't hearing the words. He seemed to be talking faster as he steered me to her door. On the door was her name; no title and no position description. Just her name.

"Tracey Hemmingway."

We all have to face our demons at some time. Mine seemed to be today. Peake was still talking as I walked into her office. I didn't knock.

Her hair was perfect. Her make-up was perfect. Her suit and accessories were perfect. She was older, but more beautiful than I had remembered. She raised her head and looked at me from her desk.

Over the years, I would find myself dwelling on the bad things that she had done and my image of her deteriorated as my hate grew. However, the fact that I still thought about her as often as I did was a good indication that deep down I still loved her. I hated what she had done, but I never stopped loving her. As this crap filled my brain, I realized that I was standing there shaking my head slowly from side to side. I felt like I was trying to con myself. Her voice pulled me out of my reverie.

"Daniel. Nobody told me that you were coming. What are you doing here?" She started to get up, but I motioned her to stay seated.

I sat across from her, not knowing how to start the conversation.

"You look good, Daniel. You look even better than you did when I saw you in Houston."

This was not the discussion I was anticipating. How was I supposed to react to that? There was no way that I was going to compliment her on her hair or dress. It was a game that I was not willing to play.

"Mister Peake asked me here today so that I could explain what the doo-dad, as he calls it, is on your desk."

Her hand instinctively went towards the glass dome, but then stopped.

"That's bullshit, Daniel, and we both know it."

"He offered me a job; again."

"He was disappointed when you turned him down in Houston."

I didn't respond. I just sat. I had no idea where this conversation was going to go.

"I wanted to talk to you, but you were gone before I could catch you."

"Why would you want to do that?"

"At the time, I was still hoping that I could explain things to you. Now I know that there was nothing to explain. It was all pretty well out in the open."

I found myself regretting coming to see her. I was trying to figure out how to leave without looking like a total jerk. Hell, why should I care?

"Daniel. Did you ever want an explanation?"

"There is one thing that I am curious about."

Her look invited me to continue.

"Why did you keep the little alarm?"

"It reminds me of how stupid I was. I look at it and know that one mistake can ruin a whole lifetime."

"You only slept with him one time?"

"No. That's not what I meant."

"Tracey, before I leave, can you provide me with a reason that won't sound like a tired old cliche?"

"Probably not."

"You gave an explanation to Carly."

"Yes, but that was before it was too late."

"What does that mean?"

"At the time Carly confronted me, nothing had happened."

I just sat and looked at her. The conversation was not going the way I wanted it to go. Somehow or other I was going to have to listen to her tell me about what happened and why. I didn't want to know. If she was going to insist, I was going to demand the 'Readers Digest' version. I didn't want all the details.

"Up until about six weeks before you left, all Todd and I did was spend time together. We had lunch and saw a few movies. Todd knew what I was doing and agreed to help me. None of this was his fault."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"It was a plan, Daniel. It was a plan that I set up to make you jealous. Well, not to actually make you jealous, but to make you pay attention."

"What are you talking about? I was buying you flowers and things. We went out to eat on a regular basis. I was doing everything that I thought you wanted me to do and you are telling me that it was all my fault?"

"That wasn't what I was looking for."

I sat without speaking.

"It was never your fault, Daniel. I never thought about it one way or the other until after you left. Then I realized what I had done and how wrong I was."

"Damn it, Tracey. You are babbling. What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'll start at the beginning.When Todd started at the company I immediately noticed him. He was well-dressed, well-groomed, and well-mannered. He was everything that you were not."

"So that is when you decided that you wanted him?"

"No. That was when I decided that I wanted you to be like he was. I never wanted him. It was always you, but I wanted you to look like him and act like him. Just like you are now."

"Okay. Then what happened?"

"I knew that it was bad in a marriage for one spouse to try and change the other one. A good marriage depended on each of the partners accepting the other one as they were. If I tried to change you, the marriage might go to hell, but if you decided to change yourself, it would be okay."

"Okay. That is the first thing you said that makes sense."

"When I started to openly spend time with Todd, it was so that you would notice. Either you would confront me about it, or figure it out for yourself and take action."

"Take action? What does that mean?"

"I was hoping that you would get a haircut; you know a regular one, like you have now. I was hoping that you would start dressing better and being a little more attentive. It never worked."

"I never knew."

"I know. The horrible thing was that Carly figured it out and confronted me. She didn't know why, but she did know what I was doing. Todd and I still had not had sex, so I didn't feel really guilty about anything, but I was a little annoyed at the fact that she questioned me. I was wrong there also. I screwed up with my husband and my daughter."

"You did have sex with him?"

"Yes. It wasn't his fault, it was mine. I know that it takes two people and I know that he could have stopped it, but he didn't.

I sat silent. I didn't know what to say and I had no more questions at the moment.

"About two weeks after Carly confronted me, Todd and I were alone at his apartment. We were drinking wine, which you know is bad for me. I was feeling really miserable that you hadn't figured it out yet. One thing led to another and Todd and I ended up in bed. Drunken sex isn't very good, but it is sex. We avoided each other for two weeks after that. I was a real bitch at home because I blamed what happened on you. You could have stopped it if you really cared. I had sex with another man because my husband didn't care about me. Really stupid."

"But you didn't end it?"

"I was so depressed by then that I had to talk to somebody and Todd was the only one available. A week later we were having sex on a regular basis and the next week you finally caught us, but it was too late."

"Well, I am truly sorry that I was so slow. I guess I should have figured it all out sooner and everything would have been fine."

"You are being a smart ass now, Daniel. It doesn't suit you."

"Were you ever planning on stopping it?"

"By that time, there was no plan. It was all just going day by day."

It was time to go. I sat quietly for a moment trying to come up with some clever repartee which never materialized.

"It was cruel and unnecessary what you did to Todd."

"Why is that?"

"Todd never did anything to deserve that. He never tried to seduce me. He never disrespected you in any fashion. He never tried to take me away from you or to break up our marriage. All he did was what I asked him to do."

"He made a few bad judgment calls."

"He has to walk with a cane for the rest of his life. It wasn't fair, Daniel."

"Yeah, well; walk a mile in my shoes and then tell me that." That was about as clever as I could muster up on short notice. There were tears in her eyes as I stood. I heard an audible sob as I walked out the door. Eight hours later I was back in Nashville.

Needless to say, Grady was disappointed when I gave him the news, however he did have a very nice severance package for me. I called Carly and told her about the conversation I had with her mother. I suggested that she make an effort to contact her, but she didn't seem too responsive.

A week later, I left Tennessee with a new pick up and a comfortable bankroll.

I ended up in Yuba City. Merrill Kohut had decided to sell his auto body shop and move to Hawaii. I knew the business and was certain that I could run the operation and still send Merrill and his wife a nice little retirement check every month. It was a clean operation just outside of town and included a small two bedroom cottage in the back. It was all that I needed. Ten men came with the business; I kept six and let the slackers go. I could pick up some new ones as I went along.

I was going to burn all those damn suits that I had accumulated, but I ended up giving them to the Salvation Army. They had a job interview program set up and the suits would come in handy for somebody that needed them.

My moustache grew back with a vigor. It seemed to be happy to be released from the constraints that it had been forced to live with over the past few years. In no time, my hair was long enough to tie back. Look out Willie Nelson, here comes Daniel Hemmingway. The business flourished and I felt like my old self. Things were going great until the week before Christmas.

When I arrived at work that morning, there was a small wrapped package on my desk. I looked at it for a moment and called my foreman in.

"What the hell is this?"

"Don't know boss. A lady came in early this morning and left it there. She said that she would be back at lunch time."

I sat for a long time without touching it. I knew what was in the damn box. There was no doubt in my mind. What I didn't know was what I was going to do after I opened it.

I got a hot cup of black coffee and stared at the box for a few more minutes and then started to unwrap it. For some strange reason I was being careful not to tear the paper.

My foreman came back in and saw me holding the black plastic object with about twenty little holes in it. He seemed mesmerized as I twisted and turned it between my fingers.

"What the hell is that Boss?"

I set it down and leaned back in my chair. "I'll tell you after lunch."