Lexi's Diary

I almost laughed. "Baby, you have my word. I will not set foot in your room."

"Not even to put away something or whatever. Mom always respected my space."

"And I will too. I promise."

"Thanks...Mark."

She disappeared through the door. I watched her drive away in her car. And then my mind began churning. Why couldn't I go into her room? What was so important? Hell, I wouldn't have gone in anyway, but the after she made a point to tell me not to, and then made me promise, and then even mentioned her mother, well...it made me suspicious. Did she have drugs in there? Or toys? I gulped. Maybe she just didn't want me to find the messy puddle of pussy juice in her sheets.

I glanced at the clock. I had to be to work in 30 minutes, which meant I had about 10 minutes to get myself together and get out of here. I returned to my room, grabbing a few things I needed, my phone, my watch, my keys, then into the bathroom, brushing my teeth, combing my hair, shaving, things I'd skipped earlier.

What the hell was in her room? I stepped back out into the hall and looked at her door. Yes, I had given her my word, and if I respected her privacy, I would not open that door. I had been a bad father and staying on this side of the door made me a good one. But wait a minute. She couldn't even be bothered to call me dad. So maybe I couldn't be bothered to obey the promise I made.

I opened the door. There was nothing shockingly out of place when I stepped in, except a few messy clothes slung about. My eyes naturally went to the bed. It was already made, the covers perfect, but I did not touch them. For all I knew this was a test and she had carefully placed things around the room in an effort to catch me, like that cup on the edge of her desk, waiting to fall off if it was nudged. Well, I was too smart for her.

Nevertheless, I did walk around and peek from place to place. I really wanted to open her drawers though. I was curious to see if she had put her clothes away. That was all. I opened the first one. It was full of socks and panties. I stared at them. God, I just wanted to plunge my face into that pile of panties. What the hell was wrong with me? Those were my daughter's! Goddamn my mind. How had it become so filthy overnight?

Oh, I was possessed. My hand lifted and started to sink into the panties, like a submarine taking on water. I couldn't stop it! I could feel silk, cotton, and lace between my fingers. I argued she would never know. No one could memorize the position of a disorganized panty drawer. I rubbed them between my fingers, feeling them, touching the crotch. My cock began to stiffen in my pants.

I felt something else too: the binding of a book. I carefully spread the panty sea apart. At the bottom of the ocean, I found a diary. Lexi kept a diary? I pulled the black book out and stared at it as if it was made of gold, as if it held the secrets of the universe, as if it was the key to winning my daughter's love after years of neglect. I forgot all about the panties as I opened the book, flipping to the most recent entry, written this morning.

September 2nd, Tuesday Morning

Dear Diary, OMG! I've gotta make this quick! I think I just saw Mark's cock! Yes! He was hard in the bathroom! It was covered by a towel, but I saw it. I couldn't believe it. I'll write more when I have time.

"Shit!" She did notice. Damn it. Let's see the previous entry.

September 1st, Monday

Dear Diary, well, I'm here. I met Daddy again. I mean, Mark. I'm going to call him Mark from now on. I don't want to think of him as my daddy. I was scared it was going to happen just like I thought, and guess what? It did. I don't know if I can stay here, thinking of him like this. I can't even look him in the eye. It's like if I do, he'll read my mind and know the truth. Oh, god, why am I like this?

"What the hell..." ...was she talking about? And she was intentionally calling me Mark so she wouldn't think of me as her daddy? Why?

August 31st, Sunday

I'm freaking out, Diary. We're leaving tomorrow. I can't even think straight. I keep telling myself the daddy in my head is not the same daddy I'm moving in with. They're different people: fantasy versus reality. But the fantasy has been getting me off for as long as I can remember. I can't even cum anymore unless I'm thinking of my daddy. But now I'm going to see him every day? And he's going to smile at me while I'm thinking about all the nasty things I've imagined him doing to me? I hate this. I don't want to live with him. I don't even want to know him. I'm so scared of him. But I want him so bad. I hope it feels differently from whatever's in my head. I hope I don't even think he's the same person. I won't let him be the same person. I'm going to call him Mark when I see him. He's not my daddy. That big fat cock I saw that hooker sucking on is my daddy's, not Mark's. Mark's just a stranger. God, why am I thinking like this? Why can't I fall for a normal boy and cum like a normal girl who doesn't have to imagine her daddy fucking her? I hate myself.

"Oh, my dear god," I said out loud. "My daughter has a fetish for me. I can't believe it. This can't be real."

I spent an hour going through that diary. When my boss called, I told him my car battery had died, but I was on my way. Of course, I didn't leave until I went through the entire diary. My daughter had been fantasizing about me for years. I was her imaginary fuck toy, the one who got her off in that twisted little mind of hers. She creamed every night imagining it was my cock, the cock she saw that day with the hooker, driving in and out of her young, unfucked cunt.

I blamed myself. Yes, my daughter was sick, but it was my fault. I had never been there as a father, so she had created a new father in my place, one in her head who was loving and caring and some kind of sexual playmate. Of course, the hooker incident had pushed her over the edge.

I hated myself as I stared down at that diary. I had created a monster without realizing it. Lexi wasn't a pervert. I was just a bastard who had warped her. Goddamn me. But what was I to do about it? How was I to fix her?

I put the diary away and headed out to my car, driving to work, turning over my problem. Once I made it to the scrap yard, I jumped behind my forklift and started moving pallets in the warehouse.

Oh, how my mind drifted. So my daughter was sexually fixated on me. That was deeply disturbing, but I suppose Freud had been postulating this a century ago. Why should it surprise me? More important was how to help her get over it. Maybe I could just be a jerk to her. No one wanted a jerk. But that was easier said than done. After all, what father wants to be a jerk to their little girl? And worse, what if it worked and she never spoke to me again?

"Harvey," I said to a buddy of mine at lunch, "you've got two daughters, right?"

"Yeah. One's mine, the other's a step."

"Has either one of them ever...upset you?"

"Huh? Oh, is this about your kid? She's moving in with you, right?"

"Yes. She did move in yesterday."

"Ah, fulltime dad again."

"Sort of."

"So what's your kid done wrong?"

"It's nothing she's done. I was just wondering if your daughters ever make you feel uncomfortable."

"How so?"

"Like your step daughter for instance. Did she ever..."

"Ever what?"

"Ever do anything inappropriate?"

"Not really. I mean, she gets in trouble, does stupid shit, stole some stuff from the mall. That what you mean?"

I sighed. "Yeah, I guess."

"Mark, it's like this. Kids learn what parents teach 'em. You teach 'em good, they do good. You teach 'em bad, they do bad."

I put my head down, thinking, and if you teach them you're a pervert, they grow up to become one as well. What have I done?

Lexi was home when I stepped through the door, sitting on the couch. She looked up at me, meeting my eyes, and then she looked away. "Hey, Mark. Welcome home."

"Thanks," I said, taking off my boots. "How was your day?"

"Fine," she said, climbing up and moving into the kitchen.

I followed her. She was putting together some bread, lunchmeat, cheese, and slicing a tomato.

"What are you doing?"

"Making myself dinner."

"I thought we could have dinner together tonight."

She glanced at me and then looked away. "You go ahead. I'm just gonna have a sandwich."

She had the sandwich together now, but it made me angry. Maybe she felt uncomfortable around me, but the only way she was going to get over it was by actually being around me. Maybe what she needed was tough love. I grabbed her plate, pulling it right out from under her, and threw it into the trashcan, breaking it.

"What the hell?" she said.

"You're not eating by yourself. In this house, we eat together."

"Don't be a jerk, Mark."

That needed to change too. If she could identify me as her daddy, it might break her of this sick fetish.

"Don't call me Mark again."

"Excuse me?"

"You can call me dad, father, daddy, hey you, but don't call me Mark again."

She scoffed. "I can call you whatever I want."

"No, you can't. It's disrespectful. You want respect, then treat me with respect."

"Why should I, when you you've been a bastard my whole life? You fuck hookers and you're a drunk. So fuck you, Mark."

I heaved an angry breath. "That's it. You want to live in the past? Fine, I'll treat you like a child." I grabbed her wrist, yanking her across the kitchen.

"What the fuck?" she cried.

I shoved her up against the table, bending her over, my hand on the back of her neck, holding her down.

"Let me go!" she screamed. "You fucking psycho, let me go!"

My other hand raised high into the air, and then it came down, swatting her on the ass, right across her skirt. She cried out.

"Ow! Ow! You fucker!"

"One!" I slapped her again. "Two!"

She screamed and kicked her legs, but I swatted her ass harder.

"Three, four! You still want to live in the past, Lexi, like a spoiled little brat?"

"I fucking hate you!"

"Good! Five!" I shouted, slapping her ass harder as she screamed even louder. "Anytime you want me to stop, just start acting like an adult, and I'll treat you like one!"

"I'm telling Mom!"

I slapped her even harder, my palm going numb. "Six! Seven!"

"Ow, ow! Please, stop! It hurts!"

"Eight!" I shouted, slapping her harder. "Are you an adult yet? Do you want to be 19 or do you want to be nine? Nine!" I slapped her once more.

"Ahh!" she cried. "I'm 19! I'm 19! Please, stop! I'll call you Daddy! Please!"

I let her up. She fell into the chair and whimpered, her lower lip trembling, tears running down her face.

"I can't believe you hit me."

I folded my arms. "I don't like punishing you, but in my home, I expect respect."

She lowered her eyes. "Y-yes, Daddy."

"Go wash your face, then come help me with dinner."

"Yes, Daddy," she said, climbing up from the chair and leaving.

I grinned nice and wide. That worked so well! Haha, I couldn't believe it! I couldn't wait to read her diary tomorrow! Oh, I knew what it would say, something like, "Dear Diary, I am so over my father. He's the biggest jerk in the world. I can't believe I ever thought he was sexy. He's just a gross, mean, asshole. I'm glad he spanked me. Now I feel normal again."

I chuckled to myself as I opened the fridge and poked around, settling on a couple of chicken breasts. I seasoned them. By the time Lexi was back, I had the vegetables out.

"Chop the carrots."

"Yes, Daddy," she said, coming to the counter, taking a knife and getting started. She was quiet as she worked. I felt I should say something.

"I hope we can start new, Lexi. That's what you moving here means, a second chance for us."

She nodded. "Okay."

"Good," I said. "Past in the past. A fresh start."

She nodded again. "Yeah."

Once dinner was on the table, the silence did not improve. Maybe I had succeeded in fixing her fetish, but I was beginning to worry I had also succeeded in making her hate me.

"How was your first day?"

She shrugged. "Busy. I have a lot of homework already."

"Meet any cool people? Maybe some cool boys?"

"Not really."

"How do you like your instructors?"

"They're nice."

"Hmm. Oh, how'd the car run?"

"Fine."

"That's good. I had a friend of mine go through it. It may not look like it, but it's clean under the hood."

"Great."

"Did you call your mother?"

She looked up at me. "And tell her you spanked me like a child? Of course not. She'd probably call the cops on you, take me out of school, and make me move home."

"I meant, uh, to talk about your day."

"Oh. No. Not yet."

"All right."

Lexi put her knife and fork down. "I'm finished. May I be excused?"

"Wait. I thought we might spend some time together tonight, watch a movie or go somewhere, something."

"I have homework. May I be excused?"

"All right, Lexi."

Lexi put her plate away, pausing there at the sink. "I'll do the dishes later if you want me to."

"How about you wash and I rinse?"

"Yes, Daddy."

She left. I looked down at my plate. Maybe I shouldn't rush this.

Later that night, I was lying in bed, thinking about my little problem child. Then I heard a sound in the hallway. Lexi had gone into the bathroom. I heard the water run, and then she returned to her room. I waited for a moment before climbing out of bed. Down the hall, I held my breath outside Lexi's door.

"Mmm, Daddy," Lexi whispered.

Oh, no, not again. I knelt down and peeked through the keyhole. Once again, I saw her bare feet spread wide open, her little toes stretching.

"Ooh, fuck, Daddy," Lexi said. "I'm sorry I'm a bad girl. Mmm, please don't spank me."

Damn it! What the hell was going on here?

"Daddy, spank me with your cock. Mmm, slap my pussy with your long shaft. Oooh."

I felt like barging in and spanking her again.

"God, Daddy, put it in my wet pussy. Fuck, I want your cock."

I growled and walked away. I almost slammed my door, but I still had the good sense to close it gently. Then I lay down, glaring at the ceiling. Goddamn her. What did I have to do to make her normal? Normal like me? My dick was half hard just listening to her play with herself.

I rolled over. Clearly, this required more thought. I needed to scare her off, do something to separate myself from this fantasy. But what? Maybe the solution was to make the fantasy real. Well, not actually real, but just a splash of cold water in the face. I wonder what would happen if I actually came on to her? Or said something inappropriate? Maybe kissed her? Even showed her my dick? It might shatter her little fantasy, gross her out. Hmm. It was worth a try...

The alarm woke me the next morning. I hit it a few times to shut it up before I found the button. I stumbled down the hall and into the bathroom, peeling off my sweatpants before tripping into the shower. I turned on the hot water and sighed. There, now I was awake. I felt my dick throb and I looked down at it.

"What do you want? You're so demanding. Fuck off."

I gave my long cock a stroke, tilting my head back, the hot water running down my chest and over my shaft. I gave it a few more tugs and it began to harden.

Knock, knock.

"Huh?"

"Daddy?"

"What?" I came back.

"Are you going to be long? I've gotta get ready for class."

"Jesus, this girl," I muttered.

But then I remembered my plan. Wait, was I serious about that? Was I really going to expose myself to my daughter, let her see my hard cock? And would it really wake her up from her weird daddy fetish and repulse her like I hoped? I left the shower running and stepped out of the tub, the water dripping off my body and coating the floor.

"Daddy?" she called, knocking again. "Daddy, can you hear me?

"Yeah, hold on, I hear you." I turned the knob and opened it.

"Oh, my god, Daddy!" she covered her eyes, though her fingers were spread apart. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Relax," I said, grabbing her arm and yanking her hand away from her eyes. "It's just a dick. If you haven't seen one by now, you need to discover the internet. Hell, when I was your age, we had co-ed dorms. Kids were running around naked everywhere. How do you think I met your mother?"

Her eyes were bulging. "I, I didn't mean you had to open the door. I just, I just—"

"Calm down, Lexi. Are you 19 or are you nine?"

"I'm 19."

"Then come into the bathroom and do what you need to do."

I turned my back and stepped into the tub under the hot water, half closing the shower curtain. It was clear anyway. I began to shampoo my hair.

"You know," Lexi said, "I could totally tell Mom about this. She'd be furious if she knew I saw your cock."

I laughed under the water, wiping my eyes to look out of the shower at my daughter. She was just standing there, staring, her eyes going up and down.

"Are you threatening to tattle on me, Lexi?"

"No, I'm just saying if Mom knew you were standing naked in front of me with your big cock rock hard, you'd be in big trouble."

"So tell her," I said, turning off the shower and stepping out. "Show me I was right to spank you like a little girl. Is that how you want me to treat you again?"

Lexi shrunk away from me, keeping her eyes down. "I'm not gonna tell."

"Your mother doesn't scare me, Lexi. Don't ever think she does. Hand me that towel."

Lexi reached for the towel, pulling it off the rack, holding it up. I snatched it from her grasp, wiping my wet face with it, running it over my hair, taking time to dry my body in front of my daughter while she kept her eyes on me, staring at my cock that was proud to stand at attention for her. Then I wrapped the towel around my waist, taking my cock from her eyes. She seemed to wake up and look at me for the first time. I smirked at her.

"I need to shave. Do you mind?"

"Oh." She stepped out from in front of the sink.

I grabbed the cream and filled my hand, rubbing it on my face. Then I began shaving. I glanced at her in the foggy mirror. "Are you going to stand there and stare at me all morning or are you going to get ready for school?"

"But I can't shower with you in here."

"Nine or 19, Lexi?"

"I'm not getting naked in front of you. That's...gross."

I grinned. Yes, just the word I wanted to hear! She was grossed out! Completely grossed out! It had worked! I laughed out loud and she kept staring. I finished shaving and dropped the razor. But I didn't leave. I made her wait until I finished brushing my teeth. I winked at her.

"Bathroom's all yours, kiddo."

Lexi watched me leave. I heard the door close behind me as I returned to my room. I laughed again as I took off my towel and looked down at my cock.

"Good job, big guy. You scared the hell out of her."

I chuckled as I dressed. I couldn't believe it. That worked so well. Perfect. Just perfect.

In the kitchen, I started breakfast. I had it all together in no time, but Lexi did not appear. I headed down the hallway. The shower was still running. I knocked once.

"Lexi?"

"Um, yes, what?"

"I have breakfast ready," I called.

"Okay, um, I'm just finishing up. Can you give me five minutes?"

"All right."

I headed back to the kitchen, keeping it warm. In point of fact, it was ten minutes before she got out of the shower and went to her room. I glanced at the clock. What the fuck was this girl doing?

"Lexi?" I called down the hall. "Let's move or they'll be no time for breakfast!"

"Coming!"

I returned to the kitchen, taking the now overcooked food off the stovetop. When I turned around, Lexi had finally arrived. She was wearing a red and black checkered skirt today, with a white blouse.

"There you are. Here, I made sausage."

Lexi looked up at me as I put a plate of scrambled eggs, toast, and a long sausage down on the table. She sat quietly in front of it, forking a bit into her mouth. I sat across from her.