Mercenary

A week before finals, my roommate at the time, Moss Farnbach, invited me to a party in West Chester. Even today, Moss is a pretty transparent guy. He's a party animal, but one with more than a minimal sense of responsibility. He's also one of the nicest and most honest people I had met at school, hence the reason for us being roommates my last two years.

So I take Moss and two of our friends to the party. I know I'm the designated driver for the evening, that's Moss' M.O. and a good reason for being invited. It didn't matter; I was looking forward to being on a different campus with different women.

It starts off as the typical frat bash: a packed house, kegs overflowing, a few fast dances with disinterested coeds, no phone numbers, and a lot of turndowns from girls with significant others milling around. A couple hours into this scene and I'm ready to wait in the car and listen to the radio until it's time to leave.

I'm slowly easing my way towards the door, trying not to be too obvious, when I suddenly feel an arm lock under mine. I turn and face someone who is undoubtedly the prettiest girl in the room, a blonde with a pair of the most mysterious eyes I had ever seen: one blue and one brown. They were hypnotic.

"You're not leaving are you?" she said leaning into me, her breathe warm on my ear.

"No, I've been looking for you." I returned with a pout. I've never been adept at comeback lines and that one I thought was very weak.

Those must been the right words because her face lit up. "Do you want to dance?" she asked while pulling me unto the dance floor. A willing convert, I followed without saying a word, all the while trying to memorize every part and line of this girl.

She was only a couple of inches shorter than my six feet. Her wavy blonde hair was long and hung gracefully over her shoulders. It reflected the twilight of the room like a halo around her. The effect was striking; it framed a face that I thought I would not soon forget.

I also kept thinking she looked like a model. With that black leather mini and those long legs I was waiting for the lights to come on and the paparazzi to come rushing through the door.

The song they were playing was fast and loud, while the dance between us was focused and competitive. Dancing with her was more like foreplay. Normally with girls I'm lucky if we look at one another only some of the time as we dance. With her our eyes locked from the moment we reached the floor. It helped that I was a pretty good dancer (I could thank my cousins for that acquired skill too).

We stayed on the floor through several fast instrumentals before a slow love song came along. As if on cue she grabbed me and snuggled into my chest. It was a gesture that caught me off guard. Given a few minutes of that it felt as if we had been doing this all of our lives.

The room by that time had grown unbearably hot, so when the song ended she led me outside to the porch. There were several couples in various poses scattered about. As soon as my eyes adjusted she was all over me, her mouth plastered to mine. It was all I could do not to fall down as my legs seemed to want to give way.

I can't exaggerate that night. It was magical. It ended at the door to her dorm room with our arms wrapped securely around one another and her tongue dancing across my teeth. That is how Moss found us before he literally dragged me back to the car.

Some five miles down the road the smile left my face. I was in a panic. In the mood of the moment I had never asked this girl's name, never given mine; no name no number...nothing.

I swung the car around in a wild u-turn at the next intersection. As we started to regain momentum I suddenly heard Moss.

"Peter, what the fuck are you doing? Are you drunk?"

"I can't believe I forgot to get her name", I said, actually talking more to myself but saying it loud enough for Moss.

"Paige Erickson? She already knows who you are. Don't worry, there's no need to go back, she'll contact you. You can bet on it."

I pulled over to the side of the road not believing what I had just heard. I turned to Moss grabbing him by his shirt collar.

Moss was caught off guard. "Hey, no need to get testy. She'll call. She already has your name and number." He was shouting. He must have seen my look of complete surprise as he unclasped my hands.

"She's my girlfriend's roommate. She told her all about you. She knew you were coming tonight and wanted to meet you. Get it? She wanted to meet you."

I sat there staring at him. She wanted to meet me. Me? She wanted to meet me? I kept shaking my head from side to side while a large smile became plastered to my face.

"Yo, Peter...can we go now?" came a comment from the back seat.

With that the spell was broken and we resumed our trip back to our own campus. All during that trip all I can think of was that gorgeous girl who wanted to meet me - Paige Erickson.

When I woke the next morning I decided to interrogate Moss a bit. He filled me in; Miss Erickson learned who I was from his girlfriend. I don't know exactly what was said about me but Moss thought it must have been highly exaggerated because his girlfriend said Paige was telling her sister about me before I had met either of them.

I was stunned. Here was this absolutely gorgeous girl in pursuit of me and I had no idea why. Moss assured me that I needed to 'play it cool'. It wasn't necessary to call Paige; she would most definitely be in touch with me. Given a conversation or two I would learn why I had been chosen.

Moss of course was at a loss as to why I was the object of her attention. He kept saying that I was one "lucky son of a bitch". If ever my stock was on the rise on campus, it was now. This was all too much for me. I couldn't concentrate on anything for the rest of the day. I was like a zombie going through the motions.

Sure enough, the next night, I get a call from Miss Erickson. That call lasted several hours. We traded bios. She was from Drexel Hill, I was from Philly. She had a twin sister and two older brothers, I had a younger brother. Her major was Education, mine was Accounting. We were both ending our junior years. She was getting out of a relationship that wasn't going anywhere and wanted a boyfriend who would be around more than a couple months. I applied for the position.

It was not your fairy tale romance. I still had to work and neither Paige nor I owned a car. So with what limited time I had available, normally on Sundays, I schlepped out 25 miles to West Chester on the bus. After only a few times of doing that I think Paige got worried about my level of commitment.

So on my fourth trip she decided that it was time for us to become intimate. It came as a complete but pleasant surprise since I hadn't pressed the issue. I won't say I hadn't thought about it. Getting into her bed had been on my mind since we first met. It's just that I wasn't in a hurry. I really did want to know her first.

Its late morning when I reach her apartment. Her roommate is gone for the weekend (compliments of Moss). The door opens and Paige is literally all over me. I'm treated to my very first blow job and an entire day of sexual bliss. After that, there are no more commitment issues, certainly not in her mind. Me, I was already becoming committed; the sex merely gave it a stamp of approval.

You see the thing about Paige is that she's not only very pretty, but she's also very smart. She entered college with SATs near 1600. I often wondered why she chose teaching as a major or West Chester as her school. Certainly she could have competed at any school in the country.

She also has a wicked sense of humor and a quick wit; and she's one very affectionate woman when she's so inclined. She was always ready for sex but I had to approach her. She never seemed to read my mood and initiate an encounter. I didn't mind. Our sex life was frequent and very satisfying. Paige was fairly easy to please. I learned that she really didn't like giving me oral, in fact, she wasn't a fan of French kissing either; but she loved my oral ministrations on her, and always seemed to enjoy intercourse.

When I was with her I was on top of the world. Paige can stroke a man's ego better than any woman I've ever met. These are all qualities to her credit, all qualities that caused me to fall in love with her. So it was no surprise to anyone when I proposed a few months later and then we got married two weeks after graduation.

However, on the downside, well, Paige is not always the most thoughtful person. She repeatedly forgot my birthday, and even after six years of marriage she still forgets I'm allergic to peanuts. But those were little things that crept up infrequently. The only big problem I faced in our relationship was her attitude towards money.

Paige had no concept of me having 'my money'. Left unchecked she would spend my money without a thought to our ongoing financial obligations. The idea of a budget was foreign to her for the first few years we were together. Even today, she grudgingly accepts that we must pay the rent before indulging ourselves at an antique auction or a trip to the theatre. I found all of this out the hard way.

During our year of courtship I learned that Paige was very knowledgeable about high finance. Of course this came as a huge surprise. Here was this girl who was planning on being a teacher of small children and she reads the financial pages for relaxation. She also had a subscription to Forbes which she read cover to cover. I was impressed.

So when we were first married she was in charge of managing the family finances. This was mostly my doing. Even though trained as an accountant I had no desire to manage our money. I thought Paige would be better suited for the job. As I said, she is very smart and since our money seemed of greater concern to her, then who best to manage it than her? Well it turned out that anyone but she would have been better.

In just a few months she proceeded to destroy our budget, have us behind on the rent and utilities and have us overdrawn in our joint checking account. Upon closer inspection I found most of our big purchases to have been on personal items for her or furniture and accessories for our apartment.

Her philosophy was to spend on non-essentials first and then delay paying on debt. As newlyweds only beginning to establish credit we could not afford to be so careless. This lead to a heated argument about the problem and it was decided that I would take over. The process worked for all of a month, until the very first time Paige had to ante up her portion for the house account. Then the wrangling began. This was the first time I had seen her temper.

She seemed to feel that the husband should use his income to support the family while a wife's income was to be used at her discretion for her own pursuits. I was shocked by her position. I tried every argument I could think of to win her over. Her belief seemed a throwback to her mother's era. When I eventually pointed that out she became self-conscious and modified her stance somewhat.

She paid her fair share but the resentment over paying tended to linger. I sought to mitigate the damage by budgeting a fancy dinner twice a month to her favorite restaurants. It was a tactic that worked. I couldn't reach her with my kind of logic but dinner proved to be a big hit.

My wife is very much a social animal so giving her a guaranteed public outing a couple of times each month met one of her basic needs. She is by nature very friendly and she projects the aura of a flirt. Fortunately, I learned this during our courtship and it was Paige who warned me.

This aspect of her personality had caused the breakup of several of her earlier relationships. While she was friendly, she assured me that she was also monogamous. It helped assuage my concerns that whenever we when out she stayed close to me. I saw how she shot down a few brave souls who approached her when I was nearby. She was almost brutal in her rebuffs.

In the evenings she would relate the lines men used on her during the day and her response. It didn't happen every day, but often enough. These stories were always a source of laughter for us and Paige seemed to get off on retelling how each guy (and a few women) reacted to rejection.

By the time we married, between her declarations of fidelity and the fact that she worked with small children all day, my inherent jealousy had gradually faded into the background. Therefore, it was not surprising that after six years of marriage I had been lulled into the belief that my wife would never cheat. Given our history, the reality of her betrayal was that much more painful.

So why did she do it? Was it about the money like my father suggested? Did she see herself getting a 'better deal' with someone else? Was that the driving force? I hated to think that it was money. Of course, if she were somehow attracted to another man because of his looks or personality that would hurt too, but if it was the money that would put Paige in a whole different category. I would be forced to re-think everything I knew about her.

As it were I WAS being forced to reevaluate our entire relationship starting from the beginning. Her actions brought even the smallest decisions she made into question. I was redesigning the person I knew as Paige Erickson Stuart.

I was suddenly enveloped I a whirlwind of leaves. While I had been pondering those questions the temperature had dropped and the wind was picking up. I couldn't keep my seat on those granite steps so I reluctantly began the journey home. There was no doubt as to my actions anymore, we needed to part ways.

I still wanted to take an inventory of our apartment. There was no point in delay. I noticed that I continued to carry Hollis' report under my arm, so upon entering the apartment I stashed the folder in my laptop case and started assessing our possessions.

Twenty minutes later, I realized that in six years of marriage we had not accumulated all that much in terms of readily saleable assets. After cataloging the living room and bedroom I decided to quickly evaluate the remaining rooms and then concentrate on a couple of projects for work.

Paige arrived home late in the afternoon. By that time I was in the living room writing a report on my laptop. She was in a particularly cheerful mood and walked over and kissed me. I decided to play along. This was consistent with her recent pattern of being home earlier. Her attitude prior to today was civil if not warm.

If today was the day she had decided to normalize our relationship after our argument of a month ago I would pretend to be relieved and thankful for the reprieve. It would buy time until she was served. Before I could say anything she had made it to the bedroom and I heard her rummaging in the closet.

From behind the door she called out. "Dana and Rob have asked us out to dinner next Tuesday. They're talking about 'Chops' in Bala. I accepted for us."

"That's fine. What's the occasion?" I responded.

"Rob was promoted to junior partner and Dana wants to celebrate." She said as she came back around the corner.

"Honey, can you unzip me please?"

She leaned back into me. I felt reach back and then the palm of her hand came moving downward across my crotch. I jumped at the touch.

She giggled at my movement. "Oh, ticklish are we?"

I knew that tone of voice. Paige was in the mood. Months ago I would have literally pounced on her; today I was barely able stomach her presence.

"No it's not that. I think I bruised a couple of ribs yesterday playing basketball. I'm having trouble standing for extended periods."

"Basketball?"

"Yeah. We had a game at the high school last night. The adult literacy group graduates next week and some of the guys wanted to play a game with their tutors. I got hit during an attempted dunk. It still hurts a little."

By now she had turned around. There was tenderness in her eyes as her hands cupped my face. "Too bad, perhaps another time when you've healed." She then kissed me softly before returning to the bedroom.

I watched her walk away, her hips swaying in an exaggerated tease. Her figure was a product of great genes not ruthless exercise. She still looked more like a model than a student. If only she were as trustworthy as she was pretty I wouldn't be in this mess. I hated having ever thought that this woman would make a good mother for my children. What was I thinking....or WITH what was I thinking?

Anyway, that story about my injury probably gained me a week or more. If I knew Paige she wasn't about to follow-up on this topic for at least that amount of time. By then it would be too late. I sighed as I came to realize that now there was yet one more social obligation to meet: dinner with Rob and Dana.

My brother-in-law Rob was a pompous ass and his wife his perfect match. She was as materialistic as he was pompous. I also knew that Paige based much of her actions on trying unsuccessfully to outdo her paternal twin. While Paige had opted for college Dana went to work directly out of high school. She was as bright as her sister so I often wondered why she chose not to further her education.

Dana had married Rob a year before Paige and I tied the knot. When they married Rob was just graduating law school. Now he was an attorney with one of the areas largest law firms. He had been on track to make partner since the day he married Dana. I knew this because he never failed to reacquaint me with his progress each time we were together.

Dana was older than Paige by minutes. This accident of fate gave her license to dictate to her 'little sister' whenever she wanted, and she 'wanted to' in phone conversations at least once a day. She and I were never close; I thought we tolerated one another for the sake of her sister.

At five foot seven, Dana was several inches shorter than Paige. She was however, no less stunning in appearance. Blond, shapely, and sporting a truly sultry voice, this was one woman that could steal the spotlight from my wife by merely opening her mouth.

Dana Erickson Barrett also had a habit of overwhelming any conversation. Given both she and her spouse in the same room one would expect her to prevent him from ever completing a sentence. Years ago when I first met Rob I found him to be a friendly and likable fellow. He had a searing wit and a phenomenal memory. He also seemed to have a cache of really funny jokes and anecdotes that he used with ease during our talks.

Being both newlyweds and in-laws made forming a bond between us evitable, and we seemed on course to becoming fast friends, at least for the first few months after their marriage. Then Rob's attitude abruptly changed. He began to mirror his wife's rude behavior.

Our subsequent conversations became solely about his career. The happy go lucky guy I was introduced to was replaced by the career hungry egotist with a dotting wife/manager.

If there seemed to be one focus of their relationship, it was Rob's professional status and Dana's goals for their future. Since Dana and Paige conversed so often I became a party to their contests by merely being with my wife. I knew I was getting Dana's sanitized view. But hearing constantly about their accomplishments from my wife only steeled my desire to avoid them where possible. Dana loved to brag about Rob to Paige and my wife would counter with stories about me. I often thought that there seemed to be some secret score each kept on the spouse of the other.

Dinner was likely to be a supreme test of my patience as the women sparred. Rob for his part would likely encourage Dana during the night to sing his praises. Dana would oblige, and in doing so would manage to overwhelm the conversation as well as her husband. I never understood why Paige allowed herself to be a part of these performances. She would bitterly complain when we returned home. She did it after every outing with them.