by TxRad
Good story! Would have liked to know what happened to his father, but still good. 5*
Hope you write more chapters to this story. An exploration of sorts for the whole family. Maybe some of Jesse's family will get involved too.
Great story! This would be a good one for a chapter 2. We just met the characters and have to say good bye, Shame, they seem like such fun folks. Would be nice to get to know them better! 😉
Cheers
SAGE
Too rushed, slow down, you got talent son. And lots of possibilities to display it on.
I agree with Klitomatic, too rushed....you write fine, just slow the story down.