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Click here"That's right. You are." His voice was once again hard and controlling and i wondered what i had done wrong, what had caused this sudden shift. He turned away from me and walked across the room, sitting in a chair opposite me.
I never took my eyes off him as he settled into that chair, stretching out before resting his hands on his knees.
"Crawl to me." He instructed, and without hesitation i complied, my bikini dragging along the floor, the concrete unforgiving against my knees. I stopped at his feet, my eyes once again on the floor.
"Take your bikini off, top and bottoms."
I took a deep breath and reached behind myself, untying the remaining knot on my bikini top, letting it flutter in the ground before undoing the two knots at my sides that held my bottoms in place, never once moving from my position at his feet, on my knees.
"Good girl, now come closer, I need some attention."
I assume there is more to come? It doesn't stand alone so well. It seems like the beginning of a story...she dies...goes to this place...meets this "man"...chooses to be his...
a good set for the coming story.
I also think the beginning is a bit long. I think a few sentences to discuss the nature of a moment in time and how it can change everything is fine...but with several paragraphs like that it makes it too hard to get into it.
I did want to read on and was disappointed when it ended. Maybe you can continue it...
I remember reading this story years back, and I had to go and find it again. It's just as good as I remember it. It's a lot more character driven than most submissions which is nice. I was just hoping there would've been a sequel by now.