All Comments on 'My Sister's a Witch!'

This story just absolutely BEGS to be continued!!!!

I especially loved the homage' to Douglas Adams. There's a lot of things to love about this story. ♥ ❤

I'm troubled by some minor issues. Like apparently Lilly is 18, but she has enough experience and training to even outshine Merlin? I would have enjoyed her being extremely strong and talented but still growing in knowledge as we follow her journey to becoming the White Witch around age 21. This was kind of hinted at when you revealed that losing her cherry would increase her power. 🧙‍♀️ 🧹 🧙‍♀️ 🧹 🧙‍♀️

Maybe Ryker can become her sidekick now. He can have a dual purpose, not only as monster bait, but having sex/making love to Lilly bringing her power to battle the forces of evil! Please consider giving us more in this story line! 🙏

amazing story, cant wait for a part 2, loved it

Oh, *please* do a part 2.

Hmm. Cute story, but the pacing and world building both felt a rushed. On the other hand, that may well have been intended, given Ryker's world was turned upside down. (Though if so, perhaps a longer intro before it all gets dumped in his lap might help accentuate the effect.)

I liked it, and would certainly continue reading, but it doesn't draw me in the way some of your other stories have. (And I love the notion that witches take ideas from stories they like, or vice-versa.)

Holy crap that got my juices going, by the end my panties were soaked! Plz make more I love the characters

A very different reality....but I really enjoyed it. Looking forward to the next instalment!

But borrowing from Hitchhikers? Hilarious! Loved this romp.

This is just ridiculously, sexy, good fun. Loved it.

I loved it ,like a fantastic journey keep them coming.

Great story need a chapter 2 or part 2

This was fun natured story. Enjoyed reading it and offered something new and different. The only thing i dont like is the fact sister can read his thoughts and to me takes away a bit of the spontaneous moment and emotion of the sex. But still a very well written story!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ still 5/5 for me for the imagination and creativity of the sexual build up. Would definitely read a pt.2.

Excellent work, as always!! More please?

I have three sisters all older and not even in the wildest spell cast be able to get my sexual attention. I really like the 20yr old sexy white witch. The story was a journey on a path never followed for me. I write fantasy for myself and never once has a family member been a witch. I've had a mind reading neighbor woman able to do sexual acts in my head. She was nothing like anything in this story. I want the big badass white witch now and I don't even have a younger sister. If only my parents had given it one more go. Awesome story, I really liked it. I'll be reading more of your writing; thanks the story rocked.

Quirky, fun and sexy.

Wow! So I was reading this without paying attention to the author’s name and thinking ILOVE this story. Got to the end, wanting more, looked to see if other stories and TOOFY! You are far and away my favorite author.

Great start. Yeah it felt a little rushed. It was still a great start hope you plan on adding on to this story

Awesome story! I too would like to see a part 2.

if you dont continue this series, i JUST MIGHT CRY... wow

Cute! A nice variation of the MIB theme. I am hopeful, this is the first part, more chapters will follow, won't they?

You are pretty good. I also personally prefer your sci-fi/fantasy writing compared to your incest one. Not that your incest writing is bad or anything, I just prefer more fantastical elements. This seems to be a blend of both. Though the introduction of fantasy elements here are a bit rushed. I look forward to your work with interest.

Really enjoyed. One of those rare stories that is actually a story that contains some sex rather than a sexting paragraph that may contain plot.

You could do with a proof reader though. Some of the typos were jarring and sometimes you seemed to forget who's perspective you were writing from.

But I'd love to read a second chapter

Great story.

Magical.

Wonderful work.

Very hot.

Very sexy.

Very romantic.

Definitely need a second part.

The second part could show that the brother is also a kind of wizard from the real world, the world of finance.

But it's not as sexy.

Although this author will make a simple story magical and sexy, too.

> Got to the end, wanting more, looked to see if other stories and TOOFY!

@anon, there might actually be a Toofy reference in this story if you go looking...

Great, hope it's just the start, will brother now start to gain powers?

Very good.

It's a funny thing, that dialog and quotation marks are some of the things that need teh most careful editing, and suffer the most, on this site.

Adding in someone that can read minds, read thoughts that were not in quotes, and responds to them, is something.

Five for you, because I cannot give you a 4.5 to 4.7, and will not give you a 4.

Well, that was weird. Normally when I see a story with witches and magic I give it a pass. Lately, though, when I see a story authored by Shakna I find I can't pass it by. I gave you four stars for your creativity but I really couldn't enjoy it very much. Just goes to prove you can't please all of the people all of the time, I suppose. Looking forward to your next tale. Thank you.

Begs for a sequel. The comments about editing are well taken but do not detract from your fine effort here. I'd like to see where you take this.

Thanks for sharing. 5* Slainté

A little weird, but l absolutely loved the story.

What an imagination you have. More please, this is the story that SHOULD have more chapters.

More please

Scores 5/5

I totally enjoyed the story. I loved the build up as well. This story begs for a sequel

Great stuff. I realy would like to read more it seems like a great start to a potential series.

Great story

love it! if you write more it'll be enjoyed!

This is without a doubt the worst sex story I've read here in a long time. Maybe go write for harlequin, but fuck right off out of literotica. Oh and the restaurant at the end of the universe? That's a book by Douglas Adams, and rest assured, you aren't him.

I loved this story. Don't pay attention to that last anonymous comment. Keep up your good work!

... or maybe better yet, demand, a series be spun off out of this?

The story is total B.S. But I loved it. It is actually well written. I usually get bored and stop stories with over 3 pages, but this one kept my attention and I wanted to find out where it was going next.

Nice twist on the subject. Well done.

Great stuff! Please continue. Also if I can shoot an idea your way, please do a story set in this where this guy or someone who’s an aphrodisiac like him is kidnapped by a league of monsters who want him for themselves like perhaps some creatures like a Fairy, Nymph, Vampiress, a Demi born from either the Greek or Norse pantheon, Jotunn, Arachnae, Werewolf girl, Oni girl, Mermaid or Goblin girl, you could use some of these, none of these whatever you want if this idea is appealing to you. Some of the girls may like each other, others may just be part of a reluctant alliance to keep him for himself and away from other monsters, I just really hope you continue/expand this universe!

Love this! We need more! Let me know if I can suggest some ideas for potential stories, don’t mind if you don’t make them just wanted to throw some ideas out there.

Fantastic start for a series. All kinds of hijinks possible. Ignore the detractors and write.

Loved it!!!

Please write more.... :)

The first time I read it, it was just another story. However, my mind kept coming back to it. The supernatural aspect combined with relationship I find very appealing. Great story!

I thought it was great. You created a whole new universe and made it like it was real. You created ideas that were not known to most of us but made me a believer. Great job.

Truly Fantastic. Very creative, unique and fun to read. I will say just because you protect someone, demanding they be yours isnt love. However, it's only a fiction story. Really well told and looking for a follow up. 5/5

... absolutely needs to continue!

5 Stars, an Instant Favorite, and I truly hope to see more, SOON.

Thanks!

I loved this story. Refreshing!

That is a grrat story. I love the world youve made so easily.

Keen to read more

Oh please, oh please write a second part to this

I loved this, and wish there was more, wish I had a sister like Lily

Another one that needs more chapters.

This is the first Literotica story where I was more engaged in the story than the sex. The sex was good, no doubt, but I cared about the rest of the story too. That's something new for me here.

We need more of this please.

Go read 'Hallowmas - Wicca Sister'

I realized about middle of page 2 that I’d read this before, but I still couldn’t stop. So you get a double helping of 5* from me. Despite a few minor edits, it’s nearly perfect. Thanks for sharing. More would not be a problem.

Tc

Totally fun story. Loved the concept. I've read some of your others. You are talented. Thank you for sharing!

This needs to be a novel length at minimum, and a series would be awesome. Great story, I agree with Drummond_someday the world created here is incredible.

Beachbum1958's 'Hallowmas - Wicca Sister' tells a better story and is just done better all round, go read that then read this again and see if I'm not right.

Well that one rocked!!!!

I realise that this is your story...buut there is only ONE 'Restaurant at the End of the Universe' and that's Milliways (see H2G2 by DNA) not The Rest Hat - ?:>}

I have to say though, you really could have done the White Witch thing better. First, we don't really see any of the work or much of the backstory behind becoming the White Witch. Wanting to protect her brother isn't nearly enough of a backstory for becoming that powerful. At least an obsession with the arcane and stuff. And since she would become so much more powerful after doing *it* with Ryker, it doesn't make much sense for her to be as powerful as she is right now. Basically what I'm saying is either not make her the White Witch, but just a regular witch, or show her becoming the White Witch. It doesn't feel right otherwise.

Oh yeah,

I forgot the Doctor Who reference [The inside of the restaurant was utterly astonishing. Just for starters, the inside was larger than the outside. Instead of one floor, it looked like at least a hundred] - nice one 'Bruce'!

Fun Fact: Douglas Adams worked on Doctor Who aand Monty Python.

Hey Anonymous (05.10.22),

I'm sorry - but Lils' journey to become the 'White Witch' is irrelevant!

We ONLY need know WHY she did and that is explained succinctly enough...did we need to know in Star Wars: Episode IV: - A New Hope how Obi-Wan Kenobi became and Knight/Master - uhm NO. It wasn't salient to the plot of the film...hell they could've not mentioned it at all in the O.T. if they didn't want to make Luke a Jedi - and if they didn't it would have been a superfluous plot line.

And to your point about the levels of her powers, shakna wrote this story - not YOU, they worked within the 'mythology' that they created...yes, it may involve pre-existing 'lore' but they adapted it for their purposes.

It's just like my sarcastic refence about Milliways being the only 'Restaurant at the End of the Universe.

In short:

It's all made up and you DIDN'T write it!

"Don't Panic!"

Wonderful and very enjoyable story, thanks. Wouldn't mind a next part like the others mentioned.

Quite unusual but nevertheless entertaining. I found myself wanting to continue reading about this couple.

More please. would love another chapter.

Really good writing, excellent creativity, and a fantastic story. I will say that the author often has high emotion women in their story. Even so the tales are quite good. 5/5 (If the author wrote a tale of love without the supercharged emotions I'd read it too.)

WHOEVER WRITE THIS STORY MADE MY DAY THANK YOU FOR THAT STORY

More, please! Love the premise, and the characters!

So well written! But....you have beaten the reluctant brother genre to death. You obviously have the talent to write so much more. Thanks for this one.

Jetzt bin ich nach über 8 Jahren an einer Geschichte von literotica gefesselt und jetzt ist sie nur so kurz ich protestiere bitte mehr ich kann dir nur 5* geben aber ich würde dir dafür 10* geben wenn ich könnte!

@AndreasVonGlatz - Es gibt ein paar mehr aus der gleichen Welt in meinem Profil. Aber es freut mich zu hören, dass es dir gefallen hat!

As a Wiccan I would like to clarify a common misconception. We are NOT devil worshipers. Much lie the Catholic church we worship two entities a male God and what we tern as the female Goddess. Our religion is represented by a 5 pointed star, with a single point at the top (like on the *U.S. flag) which is called a pentacle. This is an overly basic description of our religion.

The satanic church is also represented with a five pointed star. However this star has two points pointed upward like horns with the single point downward. I can't help but chuckle at Christmas, when I see quite a few inadvertent pentagrams displayed by Christians who are ignorant of the difference.

Far, far too many trusting folks have been taken in by false Wiccans, Who are more interested in money and/or control, and sexual abuse.

More of these two please

Pretty good like it better than the others but unfortunately you did have a mistake you had her flying on a broomstick and wearing a pointy hat witches doesn't fly on broomstick wear a pointy hat and they can't go the end of universe the universe thing is different but the other 2 is a common mistake about witches for those few who don't know any better should done a little more research but all and all I liked it

I feel like reading stories like this will give me unrealistic expectations in a partner. I want the kinda love they share so badly but I just have to keep telling myself it's not real. It's fantasy. It's not real. It's fantasy. Great story though. I only have a few more in this series but every one has amazing.

Lovely story, also like your username, it's close to Shakma a movie about an evil, killer baboon