All Comments on 'Neighbor Girl'

Great start to a series. Keep up the good work!

Lovely premise.

But sex it much too rushed.

She takes off her top, bares her tiny boobs, and doesn't ask him if they're too small?

She sees her first live cock and doesn't get familiar with it with her hands? And his balls too?

He goes fown on her and she doesn't ask him if he likes the way her pussy looks? Or tastes?

You wrote: "...beware chest..." What is that?

Four stars -- mostly for concept.

A bit to quick for me

Very hot. I felt the sensations vicariously through her. Glad she was on the pill already. As for the hymen, mine was gone way before I ever had sex due to ‘toys’. He ought to invite mom and dad over for a nude BBQ and swimming.

It would b interesting for a woman to rewrite this storyboard from Jessica's view.

LOVED the story. Hope there is a chapter 2.

Thank you for the comments. This is my first attempt. Hopefully it develops into a nice series. "Beware chest" is obviously a typo, should've been bare chest.

I can't for next time either!

8 inches of solid muscle? Guy is three times her age and she can't resist? Guy is a widower - creates all the more sympathy, right? Rub on the sunscreen - is there any other way to get a girl out of her bikini?

If the story had the slightest bit of originality it would have rated more than the two stars I gave it

Nice concept, if overused, but seemed way too rushed. Also desperately needs the touch of a decent editor, with innumerable spelling and grammatical errors.

Those people that criticize you horribly hard little coward pussies, so ignore them the way they talk to you. They may have valid points, but the way they bring it out is downright mean and hateful. I loved your story and I think you need to continue and continue practicing writing, because from what I can tell, you have a great imagination that needs to be flourished.

A decent fantasy. I agree an editor could help make it even better.

i thought the reason for these stories was to basicily get off, who cares if a word is misspelled or th ere is a comma in the wrong spot? it dosen't matter!

Good Job for your first story! Yes, this storyline has been used before but I liked it and obviously even those who made Comments on Editing enjoyed it to the end. But now you need to think of a Chapter 2. Does Mom come over when Jessica starts Junior College nearby and you have another opportunity to share your pool, deck, and more?

Thanks.

I like the elements of this story although it's a little short on character development. It's more like a "just the facts, ma'am" type of tale. One thing I wondered about, if she's a virgin, why is she on the pill? A little explanation can go a long way to add some backstory or flesh out a character. I would suggest an 18 year old virgin might need quite a bit more finessing/seducing to get to the point where she's ready and willing to go the distance with a 50 something neighbor guy. Also, one last thing, another 8 incher just seems superfluous to the story. I've been around a long time and seen a lot of cocks and 8 inchers are very, very rare. Good luck on the next installment.