All Comments on 'Neighbors'

First, you have an interesting definition of "to cheat". Second, you have a convoluted definition of "to lie". Let's face it; dressing in his usual work clothes, driving a couple of blocks, waiting a short while, and driving directly back is hardly "full disclosure" behavior. And, unfortunately, the ending was rather predictable. Aside from those elements, it was a pleasant story.

-- KK in Texas

This was a very erotic love story with a happy ending.

The sidetrack from the original agreement was obviously a way out for both couples, although it was unexpected.

I liked the story very much.

Thank you,

Norman

This is if not the very best, one of the very best <B>short</B> stories. "He" was confident and yet showed little if any arrogance.

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That said, I didn't like that bit with the three teenage boys. It was cheap, slutty, and worse (as you noted) dangerous.

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While you usually treat women very well in your stories your hero often uses them in some way without apology. There are a couple of your stories that I quit reading because of that. <BR>"Leaving the Navy" is my favorite of your stories and two of the reasons it is, are that in addition to being a great story, the protagonist is (in no order) not arrogant and he never uses any of the women.

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I realize that none of my complaints here relate to your writing skill, but they do relate to its quality**see note**. Skill will get people (me included) to read or begin to read all of your stories, even if I'm not sure I'll like it. Quality will get people to reread your stories, even if the subject is unpleasant.

**Note: Quality may not be the correct word here, I used it because I'm addressing reading enjoyment. I'm not talking about the difference between a "feel good story" and a "thought provoking story". I'm referring to the feeling/conviction that the subject was well handled and the character were consistent within themselves. All of us are much less random than we think, nearly all of us are creatures of habit. Many of us can be taught to recognize that and use it but most are not. When people we know do something that is out of character, our family and friends are surprised and concerned, even if the action is a positive.

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<I>-- srgeek --</I>

You do write well, and the story is erotic, BUT all four broke vows they had made for life, and it only takes the first serious disagreement or argument for one partner in one of the "new" marriage to say, "If he/she broke that vow like I did will he/she break a committment to me or cheat on me just as easily." I was closely acquainted with the experience you discribe - one of those marriages of partner exchanges has lasted very successfully for 40+ years; the other ended in divorce, suicide and tons of unhappiness for multiple family members.

You write like I'd like to live, and that makes reading your stories such a treat. Every time I see a story by you, my heart takes a leap of joy. Oh, boy! Hurray. You never disappoint and always leave me (and your other readers) with a sense of love, joy and happiness at what you wrote.

Liked characters, story, and sex;

BUTT ten years without a clue/discussion / etc. ,

and then both couples decide to move secretly ?

Did I miss a paragraph or three?

With a different ending it is a 100; however, ten years and no innuendos or touching? I agree with the ending but it was abrupt on the part of one couple which was out of character for their usual conduct. Something, smoother, awkward, some difficulty and culminating in mutual discovery of all their similar choices and ending with the wives squeeling and jumping into the arms of their new husbands. I think that scenario would have been an enjoyable ending. Oh, and verbally sparring with the highschool kids and baring the boobs, aahhh no and kissing them...no way; however, the two of them are a little more adventerous. Okay, basically, a pretty good story.

The request for a different ending is declined. You want a different ending, middle or even beginning... write one. I wrote this one just as I liked it. I still like it.

As for the incident with the teens, it was right out of real life. Maybe not everyone's life, but right out of my life.

And leave the ending alone. It was a bit of a surprise to me. I thought for sure we were going to have another 4 person family here. And I don't get what people's problem is with the bit with the boys. She wanted a little adventure and trusted Pete to protect her if the boys didn't respect her boundaries.

I enjoyed reading the story but I find it hard to believe that 4 people could change partners after a weekend when they have been happily married for so long. Of course the story was better for the ending it has just a bit harder to swallow.

I'm in a marriage where we love each other, but don't meet each others needs. The result is that each day, our self esteem slips just a little more, we splash frustration on each other, and the love slips just a little more.

Your way is better. Thanks for the inspiration.

I have it that both couples were - by the time they planned their getaway weekends - ready to walk away from their 10 yr marriages and change partners. Although done in a light-hearted way, it strikes me as magical thinking that the hiker would address her neighbor's husband as 'husband.' More magical thinking that all four are on the same timeline. Pretty think stuff.

The stories we all remember are the ones that are about the exceptional, the special the ones that depend on unique timing.

Who can tell us about the battle 2 days after Little Big Horn? Who was the leading Indian chief? Did he live? Very few takers I am betting (not none I also bet but)

The story - the movie - the fantasy we remember is the one about the coincidences, the fortuitous happenstance - serendipity. So when someone writes a story that requires all the stars to be aligned - it is the one we want to read - the others are dry boring tales about nothing - right?

This was something lol

Notting Hill

Notting Hill

In the intro, you said that Alison Krauss wrote the song quoted. While I agree that she did an amazing job singing it, she did not write it, nor was she the first to record or have a hit with it. "When You Say Nothing At All" was written by Paul Overstreet and Don Schlitz, and first recorded by Keith Whitley, who took it to the top of the country charts in 1988, some seven years before Alison recorded it (for a Keith Whitley tribute album).

The song "When you say nothing at all" was written by legendary songwriters Paul Overstreet and Don Schlitz and was originally performed by Keith Whitley.