Nine Million Bicycles

"I don't mind. You can ask me anything, Paula," he said in a way that almost seemed to touch her.

"Thank you, Lake, but I think I'll hold off. I have to say, though, it's been very pleasant talking with you."

"Same here. And since I was thinking the same thing, I was wondering if you might like to get together again some time and maybe talk some more."

Paula looked him for a moment then said, "Well, if it's just talking...sure. That sounds nice."

"I'm gonna take a guess here and say you probably prefer tea to coffee. Am I right?"

"I like tea, but no, I'm a coffee drinker. I have two cups every day. Any more and it makes me shaky, but I've read where two cups can have positive effects like warding off Parkinson's Disease."

"I have three or four, but it's my only vice," Lake told her. "Well, I'll have a beer once or twice a month, but that's about it."

"I don't drink at all anymore. It's not that I'm an alcoholic. I didn't drink long enough to become one, but I did get in way over my head, and I never want to go back there again."

"I hear you. I had a problem with pain medication when this sciatic nerve thing was at its worst. Since then they've found a way to block quite a bit of the pain, but it doesn't get rid of it all. But the good news is I no longer need the pills, and it's manageable enough that I can lead a normal life again."

Paula realized how much she was enjoying his company, and decided to take another small stab at 'spreading her wings'.

"If you want to try this again over coffee, you'd be more than welcome to come to my house."

Paula smiled then said, "Both of you, of course."

''I would like that very much. I'll bring something for my righthand man here to play with, and he'll be all set."

"This has been very nice, Lake. Thank you again for asking me. Oh, and for taking a risk and calling."

"I'm very happy I did, and thank you for not hanging up on me," he told her with a bit of a laugh.

Lake asked for the check, and while they waited for their server to run his credit card, they continued to talk.

"Oh, would you mind giving my your address?" he asked just before they got up to leave.

Paula watched him pull his phone out then gave him the information which he entered.

"Okay. All set! We just need to decide when."

Paula smiled then went to get up, when Lake held up a hand.

"Please. Allow me," he said as he smiled at her.

It was just a cheap wooden chair in a three-star restaurant, but that, too, touched her as she allowed him to assist her.

As she stood up, she reached for her purse, and somehow it started to fall off the table.

Lake almost lunged for it, but didn't. When it hit the floor he slowly and carefully bent down to pick it up.

Paula was about to tell him to let her get it, when she noticed his shirttail separate from his jeans. In the two-inch area of bare skin, she saw a scar, and from her days of helping out in the ER, she knew with certainty it was a gunshot wound.

For the first time she realized that almost certainly had to have happened during the war, and the location was directly in line with the location of the sciatic nerve.

He stood up very slowly, wincing twice as he did.

"Here you are," he said, still smiling, but Paula could tell it was painful.

"Let me help with Connor, okay?" she asked so cheerfully Lake assumed she just wanted to hold a little boy.

"Oh, okay. Sure. Thank you."

Paula grabbed a napkin then said, "Is it okay if I wipe off some of the ketchup?"

Connor nodded up and down in an exaggerated manner, and that made Paula laugh.

She dabbed and wiped then told him, "Okay. We got it. You ready to get down?"

"Okay!" he told her as he held his arms up to let her pick him up.

"Wow. He just slides off the chair with me," Lake told her. "I think he likes you."

"Well, I like him, too!" Paula said.

She looked at Connor and asked, "Can I carry you outside or are you too big for that now?"

"I'm big, but I'm not too big," he told her.

When he put his little arms around her neck, her heart melted and she put an arm around him. She still didn't want to put him down when they got to his father's car—which was a pickup truck—but she knew it was time.

"I'll see you again sometime, okay, Connor?" she said as she put him in his car seat.

"Okay! See you later!" he told her as she tried to figure out how the two belts worked.

"Here. Let me get that," Lake said as he stepped in closer.

Paula stood up, and as she turned around to move, she was just inches away from Lake.

"Sorry," she said as she quickly looked away the stepped to the side.

Their 'encounter' was less than a second in length, but it stirred up some kind of very strong emotion she hadn't felt in...many months if not years.

As she watched him buckle his son in, Paula saw the gunshot wound again, and had to force herself not to ask about it—especially when he went to straighten up and winced noticeably.

"You all right?" she asked as he did the twist and turn thing again.

"Yeah. I'm fine," he said once he located the pain-free position.

As he turned around, they were once again facing each other but from around a foot away.

"You know, I didn't even ask if you work. So before we decide on when to get together again, maybe I should know if you're available."

"No. I don't know how that didn't come up, but I'm a school nurse."

She told him where and the hours she worked, and Lake said that was more than the hours he worked at KNOT.

"The bad news is I don't get a lot of hours, but that's okay because the low pay makes up for it," she said with a straight face.

Paula hadn't used that one in a very long time, and hoped it wouldn't come across as bad as it sounded.

When Lake laughed, she felt relieved.

"I'm obviously not a comedian," she told him.

"No, nor am I," Lake said.

"But you did make me smile and laugh today. Thank you for that," she told him sincerely.

"And you made me feel hopeful again. So thank you for that," he said, surprisingly her completely with that remark.

The surprise turned into understanding within seconds, and Paula said, "Hope. That's a powerful word, isn't it?"

"It is. Especially when you start to think there isn't anything to be hopeful about."

Paula sensed there was a lot more to his words than the obvious. Having lost his wife, and whatever this war wound was, it was very possible he'd felt hopeless at some point. And then there was her attempt to drown her own sense of loss in a sea of expensive Scotch.

"How does that sound?" she heard him asking.

"Sorry. I think I was drifting," she said without explaining why.

"I was wondering if next Saturday works for you. To get together."

"Actually...yes. I have Yoga class at 9am, but anytime after say...12?"

"Is one o'clock reasonable?"

"That sounds...perfect," she told him.

"All right. I'll...we'll...see you then."

There was an awkward moment as they tried to decide what to do when Paula held her arms out. This time there was an actual hug even though it only lasted for a second or two.

"I had a really nice time, Lake. Thank you again."

"My pleasure, and me, too," he told her.

Tuesday was Paula's first day back at work, and as she'd hoped, it was really good for her to be out of the house. And although she wasn't wild about telling her story to every person who walked in and told her they'd heard about the impending divorce, it was nice to know people cared.

There wasn't much for her to do until the children arrived the following Monday, but she carefully went through each new student's medical forms to ensure she knew about food allergies and the like.

Having free time allowed her to text, but because Eileen was so busy with her new job, Paula only received replies during her daughter's lunch time or after work. That was just fine, because Eileen loved the job and the people she was working with.

On Wednesday, Paula finally decided to tell her daughter about her 'lunch date' with Lake then wondered how she'd explain not saying anything for so long. And that caused Paula to stop and ask herself that question. She couldn't say it was because it was so trivial it didn't matter. After all, Eileen knew about the phone calls to KNOT, and would undoubtedly be thrilled to know her mom was finally spreading her wings.

And that caused her to wonder if maybe something else was going on. Possibly even subconsciously. But what would that 'something' be? She immediately ruled out romantic feelings, and after some thought concluded it was having someone to talk to. Someone who was both pleasant and intelligent.

She also had to admit he was a handsome guy, but why did that matter? Wouldn't it be just as enjoyable were he average looking or even unattractive? Perhaps Connor played a more significant role than she was aware of. After all, were Eileen to find someone and get married, she could soon find herself a grandmother, a thought that both frightened and excited her.

She waited until later that evening before calling her daughter, and even then she was hesitant to say anything. That is, until Eileen asked about her mom's 'future husband' at KNOT.

"Lake, right?" Eileen said, trying to recall the unusual first name.

"Oh, right. Yes, I think that's his name."

"So...no more calls?" Eileen asked.

"Well, there was one," her mom admitted.

"Oh? And...?"

Paula took a deep breath then began explaining how the call wasn't from her.

"And you're just now telling me? Mom! What the hay?"

Like her mother, Eileen avoided 'coarse language' whenever possible, and she laughed at her daughter's choice of words.

"I don't know. I guess it didn't seem all that important."

"Oh, no. Hold on there, Mother Dear! You spent time with this guy at a restaurant and you invited him to the house for coffee? Our house? And you think I wouldn't want to hear about that? Seriously, Mom?"

"It's just coffee, honey," her mom insisted.

"Right! And he just happens to be hot. And have a cute little boy. Mom. You are so crushing on this guy!"

"Oh, now you hold on there, Little Girl! I am not 'crushing' on anyone. He's...30 years old, for heaven's sake."

"You said 31, Mom? Not 30."

"Well, excuse me! One whole year. Big whoop," her mom said a bit defensively.

"All right. So one year isn't a big deal. But if you enjoy his...company...why not...enjoy it?"

Paula nearly dropped the phone.

"Did you just suggest...were you implying I should...."

Eileen laughed loudly then said, "No. I implied no such thing. All I was saying is it sounds like you're having a nice time. So just enjoy it. That's all."

"Oh, okay. That makes sense."

"So if he asks you out on an actual date, you'll say 'yes', right?" her daughter asked a little too seriously.

"What? Honey, get real. That's...crazy talk!"

"All right. Color me crazy then," Eileen replied with a smile her mother 'heard' all the way to Boise.

"You're really enjoying this, aren't you?" her mother said trying to sound put out.

"I kind of am," Eileen said with a small laugh. "But I know you well enough to know you're enjoying yourself, too."

Paula sighed then said, "Okay. I'll admit it's been nice having someone to talk to about it, and I apologize for not telling you sooner."

Eileen was going to kid her mom about how there weren't any women her age left for her to talk with. Nearly all of her mom's friends were married, and once her mom wasn't, they all seemed to start distancing themselves from her. So Eileen dropped it and spent some time talking about her new job and the people she worked with.

It was no surprise Eileen had already met quite a few people as both civilians and active-duty personnel routinely came to her office. It was also no surprise she'd been asked out. What did surprise her mom was that her daughter had said 'no'.

"I just don't want to get involved with anyone yet, you know? My job comes first. At least until I'm fully comfortable with it. After that...we'll see."

They talked for another half hour about 'stuff', and Paula ended the call by telling her daughter how proud of her she was one more time.

"And it probably won't be the last."

"Ahh! Thanks, Mom. And I'm proud of you, too, for at least being open to new possibilities."

"It's just coffee and chit chat, but thank you for encouraging me."

"And if he does ask you out, please...."

"Eye?" her mom said in that 'that's enough voice'.

Being an adult, her daughter only laughed, but she did 'cease and desist'.

"Okay, fine. I won't keeping reminding you he seems like a really great guy who's handsome and smart and...."

"Eileen! Please!" her mom finally said, even though she was anything but angry. She was actually enjoying feeling like the daughter for a change.

"How about this? I love you, Mom!'

"Much better. And I love you, too, Eye."

They said goodbye, and Paula sat there smiling for quite some time thinking about the conversation but mostly about what Eileen had said about Lake asking her out.

"Yeah, right," Paula told herself before sitting down to watch some TV before going to bed.

She settled on a Hallmark movie, and by the time it was over, she was tearing up, and for the first time she could remember, feeling sorry for herself. Not in the way she'd been 'sad' when her husband tore her world apart but sad in the classic sense. Perhaps she was confusing 'sad' with 'loneliness'. Either way, it wasn't a pleasant feeling, and it came with the realization that she was the only person on earth with the ability to make it go away. And that meant either giving up the unfulfilled expectation of finding someone that was causing it or...find someone to fill the expectation.

Friday night was the worst in terms of this new feeling Paula had been experiencing. There was no reason for Lake to call or even text, but when it came time to go to bed and she still hadn't heard from him, a new wave of sadness washed over her. She tried chiding herself for being so childish, but that did nothing to make the feeling go away.

She'd thought several times about calling an old friend, but the one and only time she had since her husband moved out, the call had been strained. It was as though she'd turned into a kind of social outcast her friend was uncomfortable talking to.That happened with two other, less-close friends, so Paula had pretty much given up on looking there for emotional support.

It was all she could do not to cry when she laid down alone in the king-sized bed in the big, silent house without even a dog or a cat to keep her company. Mercifully, sleep came quickly, and the next thing she knew, her desk clock read 7:24am.

Fully rested, she got up and made a cup of coffee, and as she sipped it, it reminded her how Lake was supposed to be coming by for a cup that afternoon. She checked her cell phone but there was no missed call or text.

What if he'd forgotten? Or worse, what if he'd changed his mind and decided to not show up?

Had she not had Yoga class that morning to help clear her mind, her anxieties might have run wild. But by the time the class was over, she felt more focused and re-centered.

After a long, hot shower, she felt like her old self again, and the thought of 'old' and 'self' actually made her laugh. She threw on a robe then went to the kitchen to make something to eat, when she casually checked her phone again.

When she saw the red number '1' by her Messages icon, her heart did a flip. She opened it up then smiled.

"Hey (hey) Paula. Sorry. I couldn't resist. I've managed to also resist the urge to text you (many times) since our lunch...get together...but I haven't forgotten about our...get together....for coffee today. I'm really looking forward to seeing you again, and Connor has been asking about 'that pretty lady where I ate French fries'. So I think he's excited about seeing you, too. If it's still okay, I'll be there at 1 o'clock. Sharp."

There was a smile emoji wearing sunglasses, and Paula was still smiling when she finished reading it.

"Dear Lake. I can't wait to see you (and Connor), too. And it would have been okay to text me! Paula (Girl)."

She thought about writing 'Love, Paula' but changed her mind and went with their now-standard play on words instead. And just like that she was excited to the point of feeling giddy.

It was a little after noon when she finished getting ready, and Paula laughed when she thought about how many times she changed her mind about what to wear for 'just coffee'. The funniest was when she actually considered wearing a very sexy cocktail dress. She hadn't given it any serious consideration, but just the thought of having even considered it at all made her laugh. Then again, she was in such a good mood, almost anything could have done that.

In the end, she narrowed it down to a more simple but still very pretty dress or a white blouse with a black sweater and a pair of black pants. It wasn't as though she needed to wear black to look slimmer as she was already quite slim. It was more that it was the nicest thing she could justify wearing without looking too 'dressed up'.

She hung the dress back up, and laughed again when she pulled out a blouse that had French sleeves and required cuff links, telling herself it was still a compromise between too much and too little. Even then, she could hear Eileen laughing at her and teasing about trying to impress 'the new man in her life' as she denied it a little too forcefully to be believable. And when she painted her lips a dark, glossy red then added some gray eye shadow, mascara, and eye liner, she gave up pretending.

"Okay, so maybe I enjoy Lake's company," she said to herself when she looked in the mirror debating whether or not to add a strand of pearls or maybe wear gold to match the cufflinks. After going back and forth she abandoned the necklace and settled on a pair of gold earrings.

As she looked at the earrings once they were in place, Paula took a final look at her hair which was now almost halfway between her chin and her shoulders. She'd been parting it on one one side for some time now, and a curling iron allowed her to turn it in at the bottom, a look she really liked and that worked quite well with the shape of her face.

She had just enough time to paint her nails the same color as her lipstick and let them dry before her...company...arrived, so she sat down and turned them a dark red, too.

At 12:50, Paula stood by the window and watched for Lake's pickup. Again, she told herself she was only doing that so she could be a good hostess and not leave them waiting at the door. Clearly, it had nothing to do with being excited to see her two favorite new men.

Right at one o'clock, she saw his truck pull into the driveway, and once it was parked, Paula opened the door and walked outside to meet them.

Lake slowly slid out of the cab, and Paula noticed he never took his eyes off of her.

"Hi!" she said very cheerfully as she walked up to him.

"Hi and...wow!" Lake said as he offered to hug her first this time.

Paula didn't hesitate and accepted his invitation and hugged him bag the way longtime friends do.

As she pulled away, Lake shook his head and smiled as he said, "You look...amazing!"

"Oh...thank you! she said as though it was just something she'd kind of put on without any thought.

He shut the door and went to get Connor when Paula said, "Would you mind if I got him out?"

"Not at all. In fact, my back thanks you," he told her as he stepped aside.

He did open the door, and Paula thanked him, but she was now smiling at the little boy in the rear cab.

"Hi there, Mr. French fry lover!" she said as she started unbuckling him.

"And I like ketchup, too," he informed her as she reached under his arms and picked him up.