All Comments on 'Once Upon a Time Pt. 01'

Outstanding! Reads like a Faulkner. I own a small ranch in East Texas and your setting characters and action.rings true. Hunted a sounder or two myself.

5 stars

Great couple! We need more and soon.

5

5/5, one star just for the .300 set up. Love that Trailboss.

Terrific story !

Nice storytelling and I enjoyed it very much. One complaint is why mention her getting test for the STD and turn around and have before the results come back.

Good story with caveats.

Stilted dialogue where words we normally use conjunctions are not placed.

Sometimes they're emphasized to accent the meaning but too often casual conversations are being overlooked.

You asked for honest criticism so take it as intended and definitely continue your story.

Too unrealistic to be a story other than a fairy tale.

A kidnapped woman is beaten, raped and beaten some more, has her clothes torn off and within minutes of being rescued will calmly sit in a strange guys truck and calmly listen to the night sounds. Yea, right.

No where in this tale does she exhibit traumatic effects.

I’m done.

I was able to suspend disbelief and enjoy the story. That said, when a woman experiences rape and is not drugged or high, it is an extremely traumatic event. At minimum she will go into a defensive fight or flight mode, like experiencing a physical beating. She will be hostile to men, and company in general. In the long term, it can change her personality. She will feel unsafe, distrustful, because her sense of self has been damaged. An outgoing person could become a stay at home introvert. It also changes someone's sexual behavior and identity. Some start becoming sexually promiscuous, since inside, their sense of self-worth has been damaged. Some become prudes or frigid, unable or unwilling to experience normal sexual response. All in all, it's extremely emotionally damaging. This means the baseline of your plot is unrealistic at best. That said, I was able to get past it and enjoy the story for what it was.